Sexy Friday, Christmas Day! edition

My original idea for this post was to have a special treat for you today. Instead of using the pictures you had submitted in the previous week, I was planning on providing an extra special Christmas present by giving you a themed set of pictures.

However, Mr. Spur changed all of that for me over the weekend. You’ll see how later.

My family is a Christmas Eve family as opposed to a Christmas Day family. To those of you that may not get the difference, Christmas Eve families have the big dinner and unwrap the presents on Christmas Eve. Christmas Day families start the day on Christmas Day by opening presents and then have the big dinner later.

Each of them are equally fun and it really just depends on whether you are into delayed gratification. We are not.

This year, there will be no trip to the church for Midnight Mass. Honestly, I’m pretty grateful for that. For one, it bothers me that all the people that never go to church all of a sudden become very religious for Christmas and Easter. It’s like if your favourite dive bar became famous and all the hipsters started showing up and ruining the place. Yeah, the bar gets more money, but it feels… wrong.

Secondly, too many damn people go to church sick. I have no doubt the same thing would happen this year. That’s why I’m thankful we’re not going anywhere near that hot mess of cooties this year.

I wish the best to all of you and your families this holiday season. Please stay safe and healthy.

For those of you prudes that don’t like cheesecake or beefcake, click HERE to skip to the music videos.

***

Without further ado, here are the Top Twenty Five Pics of The Week:

h/t Brocky
h/t Unsurprised
h/t clint greasewood
h/t clint greasewood
h/t Unsurprised
h/t Don T
h/t Litre_cola
h/t Spur
h/t Spur
h/t Spur
h/t Spur
h/t Spur
h/t Spur
h/t Spur
h/t Spur
h/t Spur
h/t Spur
h/t Spur
h/t Spur
h/t Spur
h/t Spur
h/t Spur
h/t Spur
h/t Spur
h/t Spur

***

YOU’RE-A-PRUDE

***

And now, for the music!

As I mentioned before, I’ve decided that I must take up the mantle that tWBS ran with and help to make this world a better place. I will do this in the one way he couldn’t: By introducing you to good music!

Today’s selections are songs that I absolutely loved but that everyone made fun of. You can call them guilty pleasures if you want, but I usually am not one to give a shit what other people think. I like them and that’s all that matters!

Let the arguments rage in the comments!

Song Number One:

Hall & Oates – I Can’t Go For That

Canción Número Dos:

Hall & Oates – Out of Touch

Chanson Numéro Trois:

Hall & Oates – Private Eyes

Canzone numero quattro:

Hall & Oates – Maneater

Canção número cinco

Eddie Murphy – Party All The Time

Seigarren zenbakia:

Wham! – Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go

***

That’s all for this week, folks! Be good to each other and try to stay the fuck away from stupid people. That’s not COVID-19 advice, that’s just general good sense. See you next week!

BUT WAIT, THAT’S NOT ALL!

I want to talk about balls. Balls you put in your mouth. Balls that are delicious. Of course, I am talking about these babies:

This is probably the first dessert I ever tried to make and, to this day, it is my favourite to make. There are a million recipes out there but this is one of those that you can just make on the fly according to your whims.

I therefore present to you the official DFO Balls Recipe:

Ingredients:

  • Alcohol
  • Nuts
  • Vanilla wafer cookies
  • Powdered sugar
  • Corn Syrup

Tools:

  • Food Processor or Blender
  • Flat plate
  • Your hands

Procedure:

As you have noticed, I did not specify the types or quantities of alcohol or nuts. I similarly did not specify the quantity of powdered sugar. The reason is that you can customize this to your own liking. HOWEVAH, there are some general guidelines:

  • You WILL use a full box of vanilla wafer cookies. Preferably the OG Nilla Wafers.
  • You should use at least a cup of powdered sugar for the mix and a bunch more powdered sugar for the coating part. Use more powdered sugar if you want Type II diabetes.
  • You should use at least a cup of nuts and can even go up to 2 cups if you like your balls extra nutty.
  • You can choose any kind of nut you like but don’t be an asshole and choose cashews or pistachios. Those have their time and place and it isn’t in these balls.
  • You can choose any kind of alcohol and you can even do a blend of alcohols. I find that the dark alcohols work best with a combination of rum, whiskey, and orange liqueur being my personal favourite. This is also a good place for spiced rums or flavoured whiskeys like Crown Maple.
  • Obviously, add alcohol to taste, but a good guideline is to start at a 1/4 cup and work your way up to 1/2 cup if you’re serving these to drunken pervosaurs in the DFO clubhouse.
  • You WILL use corn syrup and, if you want to do it the old school way, you will use Karo corn syrup. You can substitute butter or honey, but you have to look at yourself in the mirror in the morning and feel your shame. You do you.
  • You can start with 1/4 cup of Karo and adjust based on how sticky the balls get. You don’t want your balls too sticky but they can’t fall apart either. It takes a soft touch.

Steps:

  • Empty the box of cookies in the food processor and disintegrate them into a fine powder. Put in a large metal bowl.
  • Throw your nuts (the ones you bought at the store) into the food processor and chop them fine into very small pieces. Add them to the large metal bowl.
  • Add powdered sugar to the metal bowl.
  • Add alcohol into the mixture and use your hands to mix everything together.
  • Dust your hands with powdered sugar. Trust me on this.
  • On a flat plate, spread a bunch of powdered sugar so it covers the entire surface.
  • Add the corn syrup and work everything together with your hands until the mixture sticks together and comes apart from the edge of the bowl without leaving any residue behind. Add more corn syrup if the mixture is not holding together. Add more powdered sugar if the mixture is too sticky.
  • Grab a chunk of the mixture and roll it in your hands to form a ball. The size of the ball is up to you, your experience putting balls in your mouth, and your willingness to experiment. Then, fondle the ball until it gets warm and is nice and round. Take the ball over to the plate with powdered sugar and roll it around with your hands until it is coated with the sugar. Place in a separate plate or in a container.
  • Repeat until you convert the entire bowl of mixture into sugar-coated balls.
  • Put in the fridge to chill for a bit before serving. If you can wait, they taste better the next day.
  • Put balls in mouth.
  • Enjoy!
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ballsofsteelandfury
Balls somehow lost his bio and didn't realize it. He's now scrambling to write something clever and failing. He likes butts, boobs, most things that start with the letter B, and writing in the Second Person. Geelong, Toluca, Barcelona, and Steelers, in that order.
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Dunstan

It’s nice that Kamara scored all those TDs, but nothing will ever match Al Bundy’s four TDs for Polk High.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Ok, i finished the mediocre bomber of beer and am having a treehouse as a palate cleanser

Dunstan

I’m not sure what a treehouse is, but I approve anyway.

Dunstan

Ugh. Was in a Zoom tonight with some dude who started spouting all sorts of shit about COVID and vaccines. He kept referencing his “scientific background,” so I asked him, and after dodging the question for a good sixty seconds about how that was an “appeal to authority,” (yeah, no shit dude, you’ve been appealing to your own authority this whole time), it turns out he’s an ecologist.

I’m trying to be less argumentative, so my compromise with myself was to basically pull a My Cousin Vinny: “Everything that guy just said was bullshit,” and then excuse myself as politely as possible before things got worse.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

The host should have muted that fucker

Dunstan

I was trying to gauge the audience. Sometimes you can tell that everyone else is thinking “god, this guy is full of shit,” and they’re all dying for someone else to call bullshit but don’t want to do it themselves because they’re afraid of being an asshole.

I, uh… have less inhibitions on that count, so I just plunged in even though I’m not really sure where the rest of the group was. My best guess is that one other person was skeptical, one was buying his bullshit, and two others were just dying for a change of subject.

I’m probably regarded as the bad guy for being confrontational. We’ll see. Maybe I get some back-channel messages in the next couple of days.

It’s just an meetup group that I’ve been hanging out with a few times, so not the end of the world if I’m no longer welcome. I’ve bitten my tongue on many subjects, in part because everyone is mostly nice about it, but listening to this guy seize the floor and rant about something dangerous was a bridge too far for me. And his reaction just sort of vindicated it for me. He actually started telling me “don’t be afraid, don’t be afraid” (re COVID I assume) in a patronizing way. Frankly, I’m considering myself a paragon of civility for not just telling him to fuck off.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Schedules permitting, I’m happy to join to tell him to fuck off

Unsurprised

Goodnight

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Unsurprised

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Unsurprised

For balls
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BrettFavresColonoscopy

Do we ruin everything canadian?

Doktor Zymm

I don’t think we’ve ruined poutine yet?

Unsurprised

The Queen’s Christmas message
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Unsurprised

Indeed.

I’m not sure why he didn’t like me, but I miss him.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Do I have to finish this bomber of beer before drinking something else?

Unsurprised

No. Pass it this way.

Dunstan

Drinking should be a joy, not a duty. Move on to the thing you want to drink

Doktor Zymm

You own a refrigerator, right? Pop a cork in it and save it for later when you’re more in the mood for it

BrettFavresColonoscopy

I did that. It’s more about the obligation

Doktor Zymm

Once this pesky pandemic clears up, I want to take a trip to Tequila

Dunstan

I’ll settle for tripping on tequila

BrettFavresColonoscopy

I haven’t been to mexico since I was like 3, it’s ridiculous.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

I honestly can’t tell if that’s a euphemism

Gumbygirl

More Hall and Oates you say? Why the hell not!

https://youtu.be/dYEpFJhuu1E

Doktor Zymm

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Doktor Zymm

It seems they let just any old dude be Santa back in the day

Sharkbait

$5 says being Santa is community service as a sentence for the black eye, which I assume was the result of a bar fight.

Doktor Zymm

That seems almost certainly correct

Doktor Zymm

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Sharkbait

Holidays look creepy in black and white

Dunstan

I don’t think it’s the black and white that makes that creepy.

Unsurprised

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Unsurprised

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Doktor Zymm

Turns out consumme is super easy to make, it’s just kinda pricey since you’re using extra veggies, eggs, and meat to get less broth

BrettFavresColonoscopy

So now what?

Unsurprised

Orgy?

Redshirt

That’s your answer to everything!

bk109

That doesn’t make it a wrong answer, though…

Senor Weaselo

It’s Christmas, so blood orgy!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hulS6xlnvNA

Doktor Zymm

Refreshing how well received this is in a group that’s 90% guys!

Redshirt

Get ready for the Final Boss of 2020?

Unsurprised

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Unsurprised

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Unsurprised

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Unsurprised

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Unsurprised

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litre_cola

Red head with curves? Yes fucking please.

Unsurprised

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bk109

Actually, a blonde (I read somewhere that she’s naturally blonde).. with curves and judging by the picture of her now ex-husband.. interested into more than a man’s looks 😀
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Unsurprised

This is for this week and next. https://pixxxels.cc/gallery/kWR7d3g

Unsurprised

I regularly update this as I find pics that are good NSFW. So you may as well bookmark that.

h

ttps://pixxxels.cc/gallery/16XMGkX

Unsurprised

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WCS

A Christmas with Hall & Oates?

Sign me up.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Finally busted open that belgian Christmas beer the liquor store delivered. It’s fine.

Unsurprised

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Unsurprised

If you open it in a new tab, the full-sized image is much larger.

Last edited 3 years ago by Unsurprised
Redshirt

/ annual Christmas tradition

“Redshirt! I’ve been trying to set up ______________ five times and its not working. Help!”

(one attempt and five minutes later)

“How did you do that?!”
“I followed the directions.”

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Just reinforcing that they shouldn’t be allowed to vote.

Redshirt

Based off of that, its entirely possible they messed up the voting process.

“There was a line at the scanner so I put it in the grey barrel next to it. I’m sure it counted.”

bk109

I can empathize, lol – I spent half of X-mas day solving IT issues for the family, including a laptop that got hit by a cryptolocker….. A laptop, that was perfectly set up and gifted (by me) literally 45 mins before it got fuckerized 😀

Redshirt

45 minutes? They do understand that when the popup/popunder appears, they are supposed to close it, right?

bk109

Actually it was a sad attempt at downloading Wonder Woman 1984 (Disney+ isn’t a thing here, I think… also Wonder Woman wasn’t a good movie) that went horribly wrong, lol

Redshirt

The lesson here, boy and girls? Have a good antivirus program that does scans everything it downloads, and don’t be afraid to pull the power cord or pull the battery if it looks like things are going sour.

bk109

Uhh, when was the last time you saw a new laptop with an user-accessible battery, lol? I’m legitimately asking, because those have become a thing of the past on business machines (which is why I’ve stuck to a slightly older ThinkPad as my road warrior) and I can’t even remember how long ago I last saw one on a mass-market one

Also – Chrome and SmartScreen both flagged the file, so my older sis in law helpfully googled how to disable both… and redownloaded XD

Redshirt

My current Dell has one, but it is a few years old, so it may be archaic. I run my devices until they blow up and then buy a model that’s a year or two old that’s on sale.

Also, I don’t think the hacker can be convicted for the crime, as your sister-in-law is at that point inviting him into the computer.

bk109

I don’t blame them for doing their job (or just trolling people for the lulz), but under threat of a death-glare from my wife I didn’t overemphasize my sis-in-law’s oopsie either 😀
…Then I spent like 30 minutes teaching her how to use a couple of private trackers (and 1 obscure, but public one) “I’ve totally only heard about and not ones that I’ve used so much that I have ~15TB uploads on” .
Edit: By the way, I am also the same with computers – unless I’m using a machine for gaming, I tend to use something to the bitter end … and beyond, because when I get used to something, I really hate having to move on to “the newest and bestest” (especially since of late that feels like a legitimate regression :D)

Case in point – my main gaming laptop’s like 3+ years old at this point, but unlike what replaced it, it has space for 4 separate SSDs (currently at 4+8 TB total storage,eheh), beefier cooling (thinner+lighter is invariably also hotter) and user-replaceable WiFi and WWAN modules, so until the 4 cores become a liability, I’ll stick with it 😀
Same as my work laptop – despite regularly trying newer machines (either company issue or “free samples” from the vendors we work with), I always return to a modded almost decade-old T430 as it’s a pleasure to type on AND has hot-swappable batteries, so I can run it full-bore at need 😀

Last edited 3 years ago by bk109
Redshirt

I thought Wonder Woman was good. It wasn’t Marvel good, but it was good for a DC movie. It when they started to realize that dark and gloomy doesn’t make a good movie.

I still haven’t watched “Justice League”. I’m afraid it will make “Batman Returns” looks like an episode of the 60s Batman TV-series.

bk109

That’s the problem – it’s the epitome of TV Tropes’ “so okay, it’s average” trope – it’s nothing new under the sun storywise, the plot in itself is mehtastic (especially the latter third) and when compared to even the blandest MCU movies (Captain Marvel or Ant-Man 2), it pales in comparison. The only reason it did as good as it did was that unlike every other movie in the DCEU, it actually had some bloody chemistry and charisma from the cast and was a departure from Snyder’s overstylized and under-written movies.

Unsurprised

Maybe take it back and see if they can handle an Etch-A-Sketch first. Then move your way up.

bk109

I was thinking about a CrApple (thanks to those things being made so lockdown that even development-challenged pet rocks could use those to vent on Twatter), but the machine has to be gaming capable … and nothing from Cuppertino fits that bill whatsoever

Unsurprised

Gaming is a privilege, not a right

Sharkbait

Good Lord. They should lose internet privileges

Senor Weaselo

Le grille? What the hell is le grille?

Doktor Zymm

Any of y’all play Crusader Kings? Is it good? Considering purchasing it from the Steam winter sale

bk109

Only for around 600 hours (after the annual family HoI game I’m up to around 2k hours in that one XD) – it’s nothing special on the graphical side, but it’s damn addictive (especially with some mods), same goes for most of Paradox’s grand strategy games. Honestly, the only bad thing I could say about CK3 is that the dev’s getting more and more EA-y with DLCs, but nothing that can’t be lived without.

Doktor Zymm

Good stuff, sounds like worth grabbing for 20% off!

bk109

Or you can grab it from “a certain otheRRRRRRRRR place” to give it a spin and buy it only if you like it/runs well on your machine. Given the funny little ways devs hide how good a game can actually be/run these days, the high seas may actually be the least morally dubious option, lol
Edit: By the way, I’d recommend giving the base game of HoI4 a try for the Keiserreich and Old World Blues mods:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X02I0Dkh-Ds

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HxM5FfdHVD8

Last edited 3 years ago by bk109
Senor Weaselo

I should re-download steam on the new Lappy, SBCG4AP is now available on Mac!

bk109

Oh ya silly git, you can’t game on a Mac… that thing is poorly cooled doing normal workloads, so gaming on it would just be a fun attempt at computercide :p

Senor Weaselo

Well, it’s a game from 2008, so maybe it won’t blow up in a Strong Bad-esque way?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1rQX6e-WGsk

bk109

Given the nightmares (and throttling) I’ve been dealing with at work with basically anything most of the past decade (we’ve issued basically every MBP/MBA since like ’08 and … not good lol).. I wouldn’t bet on it. Oh well, you can always keep an eye on temps (preferably using a coretemp-like app to warn ya) and decide for yerself

Senor Weaselo

I do have a fan control app, and so far it hasn’t gotten burnt to a crisp from Zoom+Finale (both are hot running apps), so so far so good!
/Knocks on wood

bk109

I do hope that you periodically use an air-duster on that bugger as well 😉 By the way, you may want to check if your machine supports undervolting, because that can slash 10C (easily) from the max temp under load (and can do wonders for thermal throttling and/or noise)

Sharkbait

Putin couldn’t hack the election, so he hacked Spencer Knight.

Am I the only one watching the World Juniors?

bk109

Probably? At least you’re not betting alone, for I have a hundred on Russia doing its best Operation Ur-anus impression on the US 😀

bk109

Good mornin’ lads and lasses an’ a happy X-mas (or… Boxing day gamblin’ slate … take yer pick)
Also, on a related note – wtf I’m doing up at 4:52AM ?!

litre_cola

Decilitre got you up, as is custom

Redshirt

(one hour ago)
“Okay, one YouTube video to post on DFO, then back to cleaning my room.”

(now)
“Son of a bitch.”

litre_cola

10 000 Days is an underrated Tool album.

herodotus450

Reading some wikipedia articles and discovered the existence of a British person named Hermione Farthingale. That’s enough christmas present for me.

Brocky

So the wonder woman sequel has 1 good point so far

my favorite frankie goes to hollywood song

https://www.youtube.com/watch?app=desktop&v=Mi-d33ImK4c

Redshirt

Is Wonder Woman 1984 worth checking out, or did DC fall back to the curve?

Last edited 3 years ago by Redshirt
litre_cola

I was just informed Tool, NOFX and Pennywise may not be appropriate bedtime music.

bk109

Lies, in fact I’ve noticed that sometimes the only thing that got my kiddos to fall asleep (when they were decilitre’s age) was some gentle Helloween, Maiden and Dio 😀
…I on the other hand am a functional insomniac, so proper music is less of a sleep aid and more of a “pleasant soundtrack” for hobbies XD

Last edited 3 years ago by bk109
litre_cola

*as i sit alone in the dark listening to Ænima.

Senor Weaselo

Auuuuugh, fruit flies got into my rum and ginger!

Brocky

I’ll never say no to extra protein

Senor Weaselo

“Hey, extra protein” is what Madre Weaselo said!

Senor Weaselo

Between MacGyver, Magnum, SWAT, NCIS, and Young Sheldon, is anything on CBS not a spin-off?

litre_cola

Mary was totally a virgin.

Senor Weaselo

Or at least like one.

Brocky

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Brocky

hands down the funniest stand up I’ve ever seen. my mother bought me the dvd knowing full well how filthy it was,

Brocky

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Gumbygirl

Those are some schweddy balls, Balls!

BrettFavresColonoscopy

(takes out kettle costume)

Is it just me or does Lebron look a little portly?

Fronkenshteen

Perhaps.

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Fronkenshteen

Imagine if that Kamara performance happened on MNF instead of being the very first game of fantasy championship weekend.

Redshirt

That would be painful. It would be the fantasy football equivalent of watching them setup the plastic tarps and champagne for the Championship celebration and then quickly tear it down as your team so your despondent players don’t see it when they walk of the field.

Fronkenshteen

Right? “All I need is for Kamara to not score six touchdowns…”

Horatio Cornblower

Kamara at 4 TDs

Me: comment image

Senor Weaselo

It would be a commence drinking moment. All of it.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

A) Party All the Time deserves all the shit it gets, it’s terrible.
B) Bourbon balls are delicious
C) Hall and Oates are fantastic.

litre_cola

These are all good taeks

Doktor Zymm

I made French Onion soup all from scratch (well, except for the toasts and cheese, but c’mon)! Just portioned myself out a bowl and about to enjoy with a fancy cabernet. Life is good right about now.

Fronkenshteen

That sounds fantastic.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

What he said

Redshirt

Family had prime rib for dinner. While not as good as French Onion soup, it was still a nice Christmas dinner.

Last edited 3 years ago by Redshirt
Fronkenshteen

Prime rib ain’t nothing to sneeze at, though. Horseradish cream sauce or Au Jus?

Redshirt

Au jus, but with it was cooked with cracked peppercorn for seasoning.

Dad had horseradish sauce. I don’t really like the taste of it. I’m a picky eater; if I eat something that I don’t like. I’ll never eat it again.

yeah right

All of the horseradish.

Brocky

I had ribs from an insta pot.

tasted fine, but stomachs been doing flips for about two hours.

too much eggnog?

Unsurprised

Well, it’s not like you can get Covid twice.

Redshirt

Its the immediate family so its safe. We are visiting our 87-year old mother/grandma tomorrow, but since we’ve had COVID recently we are safe and she is safe. Also, she is blind, diabetic with heart problems and her mind is all but gone. If COVID wasn’t happening, she would be in a nursing home.

We figured this will probably be her last Christmas, so the entire extended family is meeting her separately.

Unsurprised

That’s cool.

Gumbygirl

I will be there soon!

Unsurprised

That’s fine. There are worse things they could be doing with that money.

Besides, it’s not like they’re giving it all away.

Last edited 3 years ago by Unsurprised
Redshirt

Ah, the CNN website made it look like they were donating their whole profits.

That’s good for them. $250,000 is life changing money and it sounds like they are getting more than that.

Unsurprised

Your first problem was being on CNN.com

Unsurprised

No joke. It was within weeks of Ted Turner selling his empire to AOL being finalized in 1998 when the quality at CNN and its website just began to plummet and it’s just gotten so much worse since then.

Last edited 3 years ago by Unsurprised
Redshirt

I know, but my options were slim:

I’m still a Rational Republican, so I can’t watch MSNBC without getting a cramp in my neck from shaking my head no every 30 seconds. Its like we see the same problem, but the solutions are too wrong for me.

I can’t watch Fox News, as only a few of you know my real name and none of them don’t have the training or equipment necessary to counter the subliminal messaging.

I can’t watch OAN or whatever else Trump is pushing. I hate/loathe/rue/lament the man. Besides, if I wanted to see the pedantic bitching of an overweight man with a bad haircut ruining his life because of his painfully bad decisions and shattered psyche while also ruining the family name, I would think back to that dark spring in college when I got acute depression due to my GPA flatlining, quit going to classes and nearly flunked out of school a failure. (Don’t worry, I got better…-ish and I graduated three years later.)

I watch CNN, because its the closest to the middle I can get. I would quote Kevin Spacey’s character in “The Negotiator” where I say I listen to everything on a subject and then decided for myself what really happen, but with what happened to Spacey, I’m going to quote the late, great Aron Eisenberg’s character in Star Trek: DS9: “Hear all, trust nothing.”