And then there wuz FOUR. Rage on, y’all!
2MW Houston (+5) v. 1S Baylor (5:14, CBS)
All Texas early on, but not with the squadrons one is used to seeing. It’s been easy to overlook, overshadowed by Gonzaga’s dominance, but the JV 500s and Bay-Bay have looked mighty strong, too. Expect this one to go down to maybe the last possession. I certainly expect/hope for some dramatics.
11E UCLA (+14) v. 1W Gonzaga (8:34, CBS)
CBS did us all a solid, putting this one on late. If it’s an ass-beating, we can just pass out, without any worry that we will snooze through the other fixture. But like I said last round – Mick Cronin’s bunch are REALLY good at forcing their tempo on you. They did it to Michigan, and were able to pip them late. Zags haven’t been in a legitimately close game since…maybe December 2019? I ain’t looking it up.
Do you think scientists will ever figure out why time slows down when a basketball player has the ball inside the key? It’s IMPOSSIBLE for 3 seconds to elapse.
Gotta switch to the Elam ending
Jason Elam is a God- K. Hippo
Shame Hippo is in a pill coma and missing the best game of the tourney.
On the positive side, I’m sure tomorrow’s footy games will *totally* make up for it.
Asked for Bruins to outscore the Zags in the 2nd half, and they did by 1, so thanks?
5 LONG-ass minutes coming up.
Maybe UCLA doesn’t want to win after all.
Aaaaaargh overtime.
Diablo’s Shadow Navy Strength rum, Grapefruit liqueur, Bolivar bitters, soda water. It’s good, but packs a punch. Wish I had some actual grapefruit to garnish
Dehydrated grapefruit wheel garnish for the full effect?
I just remembered I have grapefruit sour candies! That’s going to be the closest I get I think
TIMME!!!
Also, where’s Gobbles?
Another beer, or cocktail time? I think cocktail time, I have a local navy strength rum to try
Navy Strength Rum is dangerous. But yes.
It’s always cocktail time.
Yes.
The Harley Quinn cartoon is having a Season 3 in Late 2021?!
(looks Heavenward with arms open wide in worship)
God, I’m sorry, I love my country.
I was really impressed by that show.
We need something to watch and John Wick was last night. John Wick Chapter 2 was rejected, as was the new Bill and Ted. So what else is there?
youporn, pornhub, xhamster, etc.
I watched the new Bill and Ted’s today. Don’t waste your time on it
YOU’RE NOT MY SUPERVISOR
I’m waiting for it for it to be shown on TV for free.
Still not worth it
I saw the Sonic the Hedgehog movie last night. It wasn’t that bad really.
Movie or TV show? Ted Lasso was good for TV. Movies? No idea what is out there that would be good
Ted Lasso was a masterpiece
Tyger Tyger burning bright
Dragged his pivot, it’s alright
i like how ramese’s son sounds like he just walked off the set of little rascals
Sup
for once in our lives, the most of us are rooting for a team called the bruins
God bless Canada.
There haven’t been that many people laid in Dallas like that since Debbie.
….so apparently abc showing the ten commandments is an easter tradition.
and moses met jesus when?
Easter is about when Moses parted the Red Sea and found the drowned body of Jesus. Have you not read Ecclesiastes?
I thought it was when Jesus Shuttleworth challenged Moses Malone to a dunking competition on the mean streets of Brooklyn circa 1985 BC
A little closer to Bill Simmons than we’re all comfortable with
Of course, he was found in an egg and that’s why we have Easter Egg hunts.
(That comment may not send me to Hell but it will be, yet another, awkward moment in my Final Judgment when the book of my life is read. “This isn’t counted against you; we’re just saying out loud to show everything, you included, that this happened.”)
lets just say its been a while.
also, jesus drowned, uh, like, uh….
shit i thought he rose from the dead then ascended to heaven
I think they do it for Passover. Also, it would get both the Jewish and Christian viewerships.
Plus, the story of Jesus’ death and resurrection has been hard to show as a movie. The Passion of the Christ shows in vivid detail the torture and death of Jesus Christ, but nothing about what happens after he is resurrected. It would be showing a football game, but you can only watch the quarterback and not what happens when he hands off/throw the football.
Flagrant Foul 1 Example #35: ARMBAR!
Hey, Daddy Day Care is on. I worked one year as a Day Care Teacher and I can confirm this movie is a chilling accurate documentary. Too bad they didn’t do a sequel, like the Matrix stopping at one, Police Academy stopping at two, Terminator stopping at two, Rocky stopping at 4, Rambo stopping at 4, Disney stopping at one multiple-ass times…
I saw that film as a teenager as part of the drive ins double feature with Bruce almighty.
was a far better film than i thought it would be
A friend stopped by with his kids to get “parent buzzed” this afternoon. I could either stop drinking now or… well, I think we all know where this is headed.
Well, I asked for competitive. So now I’m gonna ask for the Bruins to win the 2nd half.
Oh, and a pony.
Thanks!
[monkey’s paw curls]
Well, I asked for Brie Larson. So now I’m gonna ask for the Bruins to win the 2nd half.
If i had a genie give me 3 wishs I would legitimately use one of them to watch a fight between Larson and this fat neckbeard who hated captain marvel.
it would be like when cartman fought wendy, but somehow even more one sided
I can see someone not liking it (Captain Marvel is overpowered like Superman, so that eliminates the risk of them losing), but hating it?
I’m going out on a limb here, but the guy shouldn’t take it out on Brie Larson that he’s been rejected from everyone up to and including his dominant hand.
superman_dark_knight.png (350×260) (tvtropes.org)
Thanks!
In honor of Trans Day of Visibility, I did the Buffalo Bill dance and tuck for the company talent show. Apparently they would fuck me, in the form of getting suspended.
That’s odd. I didn’t even do a dance and my old job fucked me over after 12+ years of service.
I do have some leads so I might be able to get a better job with a small raise.
Too bad they couldn’t have waited until Kings Island opened up. I gotta a season pass with a meal plan. I could’ve lived there, camped out in my car, and floated around on a innertube on lazy river in place of bathing.
pics or it didn’t happen
I just checked on the game, and now UCLA needs a timeout. I will go away for awhile, because I’m kind of jinxish.
evening.
It’s still daylight here, damnit!
Thanks, Lyndon Johnson
the hell is that profile picture?
I changed it when I couldn’t take that fucker’s politics anymore
At least you have a profile picture. Mine was snapped away to preserve the delicate balance to keep the website running.
UCLA was criminally underseeded in this tournament.
There’s no consequence for underseeding though, except maybe if it throws off the betting
It is detrimental towards the other teams. Imagine being a #3 seed going into the Sweet 16 facing a double-digit seed. You may be caught looking ahead.
They are doing textbook Mick Cronin-style ball: Defense and ball control.
Those also made AC Green standout on the showtime Lakers.
Criminally underseeded was Andrei Chikatilo’s raison d’etre.
I had a really entertaining internet argument the other day. Some gal was insisting that Africa is not connected to any other continent by land
Doesn’t the suez canal make that technically correct? Or am I as stupid I as presume?
That’s the argument I’d have made if I had backed myself into the corner the way that gal did.
What’s the ocean except for land with some temporary water on top of it?
Amen, we’re all connected by land through the earth’s core.
Technically yes (although there are tunnels, which could also technically invalidate that), but that wasn’t what she was claiming. She was totally fine with N. and S. America being connected. She went so far as to post a standard political map and told me to zoom in and I would see they aren’t connected!
Yeah, I wouldn’t count tunnels or bridges as counting. So canals wouldn’t either.
That may be first refusal to acknowledge the existence of Israel that is free of anti-Semitism.
unrelated, the ten commandments is on ABC
Is that the one with Yvonne DeCarlo? I get my biblical movies mixed up.
yep.
i have the same problem, ben hur and this movie just run together. share the same universe
(Hippo puts 1500 LE on Ramesses)
I made a similar joke, i come in and ask pops if the game is on, he says yeah, i see its the movie, and i ask who’s winning, without missing a beat, he says rameses
Huh. I hadn’t thought about MTV in so long I just assumed all their content had entered into the public domain.
Is there any argument that UCLA collectively has the best hair in the tournament?
“Where’s Kevin McHale?”
At a Trump rally, wrecking my memory of him as my favorite player.
Really? That’s disappointing, but it at least justifies my 80s hatred of him.
Yeah, it means I can look back on some of his biggest fuckups and take some joy in them.
So he’s as dead on the inside as he looks on the outside?
His nickname should have been The Undertaker.
Tyger is a mini Sideshow Bob
Sideshow Tyger.
Let’s stay competitive Bruins!
(Being realistic)
So are we all choosing spiffy new avatars?
Dodgers turned into Burnley so fast, I didn’t even notice. Jackie Robinson would be so proud.
Toilet brush with a stand up double.
Took LAD -1.5 after4. Sonny Gray looks unhittable tho. Also, if yer styling with a big bushy beard, and you ain’t Qanon? You deserve the shit sandwich you’re forced to consume every day.
“We’re getting closer to the tip” says Greg Gumbel, reminding everyone how he got that job in the first place.
New show from CBS: “Immigrants are funny!”
If I ever saw a sign with an arrow that read “free wood” I would stand next to it so it pointed at my crotch.
I like how some people are declaring that it’s now un-American to support baseball.
I got on Mike Huckabeast’s Twitter and flamed his dumb ass. Idiot.
I did the same to Ronna “DON’T CALL ME ROMNEY” McShithead.
Her relatives should disinvite her from every family event for the rest of her life.
Yes, because she’ll eat everything.
I told her that her father was a better person than her, and that he’s pure garbage.
Spending too much money to waste time watching something that employs a bunch of immigrants and is ultimately kinda boring while complaining about how much better it was back in the day? Sounds pretty American to me!
Very daydrunk at the inlaws.
Yeah, definitely the inlays’ fault.
Look, some people don’t handle tile work very well.
“You’re telling me!” – Tim Tebow, frustrated that his opponents keep rejecting his attempts at spelling words in Scrabble
I meant Irsay.
The place with all the peaty Scotch?
This place officially ded? Nothing, and I mean NOTHING makes sense trying to log in here anymore. If the place needs $, you can have my bank details, like, today. But it hurts to watch this joint shrivel up like a worm on the sidewalk. Uproxx can go get fucked.
Legit the data transfer should be done by the end of the weekend. The site is bigger than expected. Howevah slowly we are getting back to normal, I ain’t have to refresh after kommenting.
Thank god. I’ve held back so many banner quotes because I didn’t want to refresh.
I was genuinely touched by how many people contributed to Request Line given the issues we’ve been having.
That was a great Request Line!
Thanks!
It’s being worked on, just hold tight for a couple more days and will hopefully be worked out
If I remember correctly from that other site, it’s not over until the fat lady posts scheisse porn
Ume plum potato chips? Yum!
Is it wrong to have the hots for Hannah Montana?
Based on her music? Yes. Based on her loooks? …maybe.
*slides a stack of lps and cds under clubhouse couch*
From what I’ve seen of her on The Voice, Miley seems like she’d be a gawky, goofy, fun lover. There’s not too many women I’d turn my nose up at, and she’s certainly not one of them.
Currently listening to her
It’s been pretty nice not hearing about our former president here in the U.S. as we’ve been pretty focused on cleaning up the mess he left behind, but it was fun to take a break from ignoring him today to read about how he fleeced people who donated to his campaign by automatically opting them in as recurring donors. We told them his campaign would steal from them, and it did.
Oldest trick in the book, just put a little checkbox on your payment page:
“Check this box if you don’t want to not ever be considered for not declining heretofore any and not all negative payments from us to you”
3rd Reds Hit By Pitch – 2nd HBP after the Benches were Warned.
Even the referees who did the 2016 Bengals-Steelers Wild Card Game is wondering what the hell is going on.
Steeler_Ref.jpg (1600×900) (vox-cdn.com)
WATCH: First trailer for Space Jam: A New Legacy, starring LeBron James, released – CBSSports.com
HA! They are two days too late for April Fools Day!
Ted Cruz’s attempt to insert himself somehow into the Bay-Coog matchup did not go all that well.
https://www.rawstory.com/ted-cruz-texas-2651353724/
https://twitter.com/jonathanvswan/status/1378005545718800388
“Freedom also means the freedom to obstruct 4 (or was it 6?) years of legislative progress in your country because the president is
blacka guy you don’t like.”But he cries a lot. Doesn’t that mean he’s a nice guy?
Just kidding, I don’t like this guy.
Also, lot of people seem to come out with their hate of Ted Cruz AFTER they quit their positions of power where they could have actually effected Cruz in some way.
I was hating Ted Cruz before it was cool!
In 2016, I would’ve voted for Trump over Cruz if I had to (assuming Seppuku wasn’t an option). Today, with everything I know that happened, I still would vote for Trump over Cruz.
Isn’t he from my neck of the woods? Lunatic conservative area in Alberta so it would make sense.
While I would find him to be a Born Canadian after all the BS he’s pulled for immigration and Conservatism orgasmically hilarious, I wouldn’t want to impugn my Canadian Brothers and Sisters or take credit away from the Devil’s Ass Hairs that dingleberry feel from.
Redshirt I live in a backwards ass province where Cruz is from. I would not wish our current premier right now on my worst enemy. He is trying to be Trump with less personality. It is a fucking joke.
Boehner is not a good guy. But I would gladly put down a bottle or two of wine with him to hear nasty stories about Ted Cruz.
MLB: “We want our players to show emotion on the field.”
Reds RF Castellanos: Hit by Pitch but doesn’t rush pitcher
Reds RF Castellanos: Scores on Wild Pitch and Flexes in Pitcher’s Face at Home
Cardinals C Molina: Pushes Castellanos in the back as he’s going toward dugout
(5 minute fight ensures in infield and outfield)
Player(s) Ejected: Reds RF Castellanos (Showing Emotion on the Field)
Gotta love BLEERGH bias against Cincinnati teams.
Bally Sports Cincinnati on Twitter: “The Reds’ and Cardinals’ dugouts have emptied after Nick Castellanos scores on a wild pitch. https://t.co/M8sSctUjbo” / Twitter
Absolutely nobody in sports tougher than Molina as long as 4-5 guys are “holding him back” from getting at the guy he started shit with.
I don’t think there’s any dramatics forthcoming in this matchup, Hippo.
May as well start the heavy pill applications now and be up early for the footy.
This is a solid idea. Pill O’Clock!
It’s been wine o’clock for hours. Not to mention edibles since I woke up. (am at inlaws)
It’s been Vodka O’Clock since I woke up. Catch up.
Just you and I in here Hippo, have any aktion tonight? You know I am all in for a SecsiMexi 3 way( heh) parlay!
I am trying to be good and quit for the day on my Troyes win. But this game isn’t doing much to distract me from my demons.
Have you found Jesus? He may be behind the couch with the demons.
He does like His naps, chuh chuh
You know, I do find the Spike Lee, Barkley, Nantz, fucking Samuel fucking Jackson commercials quite humoUrous
Is Bey Bey Jesuit? If the Zags win as well to quote Hippo will we get hawt Jezzie on Jezzie aktion?
Nah. Baptist.
The old joke down South is that “as long as Catholics marry Baptists, there will always be the Methodist Church.”
So collegiate rapeyness is ok with the Baptists? Got it.
They can be on the patriarchal side, no doubt.