Your “Just Go On About Your Business” Tuesday Evening Open Thread

NFL Noise:

  • Let’s start the day with a little Stealing from Crimebeat!:
    • Frank Clark got pulled over for a “moving violation” Sunday night, but was arrested for having an Uzi in the front seat.
      • Officers noticed a bag with an Uzi sticking out in plain sight in the car, so Clark was then arrested on suspicion of having a concealed firearm in a vehicle.
        • It’s a felony charge, which explains the $35,000 bond.
        • The passengers were released without charge.
      • The NFL office has released a statement saying it is “aware” of the incident.
    • Less worrisome but still concerning is that Cardinals rookie linebacker & first-round pick Zaven Collins was arrested Sunday morning for excessive speed and reckless driving.
        • According to the police report, he was driving 76 mph in a 35-mph zone when he was stopped.
          • The excessive speed was what caused the arrest, which is apparently standard under Arizona law once you are clocked at 20-mph over the posted limit.
            • Similar offences include being clocked over 85-mph, and being over 35-mph in a school zone.
        • At least there wasn’t booze involved.
    • Antonio Brown finished his probation after only one year.
      • He was supposed to do two years of probation for a felony burglary charge, one year for a battery charge, and six months for a criminal mischief charge.
        • He also completed 100 hours of community service and a 13-week anger management course.
      • He’s still facing a civil suit for the incident, as the guy he roughed up is seeking $30,000 in damages for bodily injury and mental anguish as a result of the altercation.
  • Cue the “It’s about his religion” lunatics – Tim Tebow wasn’t invited to George Kittle’s “Tight End University”.
    • Oh sure – he’s saying all the right things:
      • “Nothing against Tim Tebow… I hope he has a great year, but it’s hard for me to invite someone to this that just started playing the position when I can’t invite a guy that’s been playing it for eight to 10 years.”
    • Kittle said they planned for 20-25 guys attending, but got interest from 45-50.
      • They didn’t have the space available, under COVID guidelines.
    • The whole thing is being organized by Kittle, Chiefs’ TE Travis Kelce, and former player Greg Olsen.

The big news from yesterday – and today – is Carl Nassib telling the world he’s part of the 10%. 

  • National disgrace Roger Goodell quickly announced the NFL was offering its full support:
    • “The NFL family is proud of Carl for courageously sharing his truth today,” Goodell wrote. “Representation matters. We share his hope that someday soon statements like his will no longer be newsworthy as we march toward full equality for the LGBTQ+ community. We wish Carl the best of luck this coming season.”
    • The NFL also said it would match Nassib’s $100,000 donation to the Trevor Project.
  • Mark Davis had some surprisingly pure thoughts on the matter:
    • “It’s 2021 and he’s a Raider. If he’s happy, I’m happy. It takes courage. I thought we got to the point where this wasn’t (a story). It doesn’t change my opinion of him as a man or as a Raider.”
  • He’s been getting plenty of support from across the League.
    • Which you would kind of expect.
    • It’s kind of bad form, but many news sites also sought out Michael Sam to get his opinion.
      • Backhandedly pointing out that he was the first openly gay player drafted, but not the first openly gay player to play in the league.
  • His Nassib’s jersey is now the #1 seller at Fanatics.
    • And based on the comments on the Raiders’ Twitter page, it seems like most people don’t seem to care.
      • There are some “This Tweet was deleted by the Tweet author”‘s, but that’s to be expected when people get ratioed for being assholes online.

Tonight’s sports:

  • NHL:
    • Habs at Vegas – 9:00pm | NBCSN / CBC / Sportsnet
      • Game 5 – series tied 2-2
  • NBA:
    • Draft Lottery – 8:30pm | ESPN / TSN / Sportsnet360
    • Clippers at Suns – 9:00pm | ESPN / Sportsnet360
  • WNBA:
    • Wings vs. Sun – 7:00pm | TSN3
  •  MLB:
    • Blue Jays at Marlins – 7:00pm | Sportsnet1

I’m assuming Jake is here tomorrow night for not-Wrestling Wednesday, as the NBA playoffs have AEW on Saturday this week. But maybe I can arrange a switch with him.

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Beerguyrob
A Canadian man-child of indeterminate age, he stays young by selling alcohol at sporting events and yelling at the patrons he serves. Their rage nourishes his soul, and their tips pay for his numerous trips to various sporting events.
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Gumbygirl

SO CAL, turn on the news! Truckload of cows escaped in Pico Rivera, and they aren’t going quietly!

Brick Meathook

Which channel?

Gumbygirl

It was on 4 and 7. I’m sure they have it on their websites. It was crazy!

Gumbygirl

About 30 of them busted out of a slaughterhouse. They should get to go to a nice farm upstate, after all this trauma. The last one they caught was an angry mofo.

Brick Meathook

Good Lord I had to watch the opening to Jimmy Kimmel

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

[montage of Andy Reid strapping on cowboy gear]

Gumbygirl

I guess Scotland is the gray horse of the Euro’s. Figures! I’m still lurking in the middle of the pack in the DFO pool, no idea why!

1622002755029_50963753626130.jpg
Gumbygirl

I don’t know if anyone has ever done one, but I did one of those Cologuard home tests today. It was a unique combination of impressive, gross, and hilarious! But I guess anything is better than a stick up the ass.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Is it though?

–Balls, probably

Gumbygirl

Gumby sent me this one

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Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

In the close-ups the drivers are actors James Garner (in front) and Brian Bedford (trying to pass, with the tartan-striped helmet). In the wide shots, Bedford’s car was actually driven by racing legend Jackie Stewart, and Garner’s car was driven by . . . James Garner. Stewart said that Garner was good enough to have been a pro racer.

Brick Meathook

comment image

Gumbygirl

That was a good movie. James Garner was watchable in everything he was in.

Viva La Tabula Raza

My dad’s favourite was always The Pink Jungle. Reading about that movie now on the tubes, apparently it sucked.

Mr. Ayo

Sad that Monaco is just a boring parade now.

Mr. Ayo

What a Finnish!

Mr. Ayo

Sigh. I posted this 6 minutes ago and the game is decidedly not over yet.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Hopefully after a night’s sleep my brain will edit out the twenty minutes of LAWYERBALL that dominated the final two minutes of that game and I’ll remember that finish as it deserves to be remembered.

SonOfSpam

So how do we feel about Mayor Adams (the most likely conclusion)?

Minority: Good!
Cop: Bad!
Potassium Benzoate: …

Senor Weaselo

Decidedly meh.

SonOfSpam

Thanks, don’t know nearly enough to form an opinion, but I like Wiley.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I’m psyched as fuck that the DA slot didn’t go to that sleazy Tulsi Gabbard wannabe.

SonOfSpam

Oh, that’s good. The DA spot is important, for…reasons.

Gumbygirl

Shhhh, it’s a surprise!
I mean I’ll be surprised if anyone gets indicted.

Horatio Cornblower
Doktor Zymm

Truman Capote’s birth name was Truman Streckfus Persons

Mr. Ayo

Truman Persons sounds like a character name in the worst fictional novel ever.

SonOfSpam

Streckfus is a German word meaning “macho hog-dicked ladies man” so they nailed it.

Mr. Ayo

One thing I love about the association is their quick and efficient timeouts and video reviews.

Doktor Zymm

It has been a crazy day. I think also a productive day, but I’m ready for a few hours where I don’t have to think about any of the following: condo associations, windows, legitimacy, stakeholders of any sort, laundry room etiquette, laundry itself, qualitative metrics, transparency, accountability, aesthetic tastes in colors, and measuring abstract concepts.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

“Don’t want to think? I can help with that.” – the booze of your choice

Doktor Zymm

Unfortunately tomorrow is a morning training day, and after many, many trials I’ve reached the conclusion that it’s not worth it to drink the night before

Sharkbait

Have a double when training is over.

Dunstan

The lesson is, never do training.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

“That’s bad advice.” – Najeh Davenport’s parents

Redshirt

Holy crap. NFL Network showed a 1986 game between the New York Giants and the Washington ReeeeeeeuuuuuuhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhThoseGuys!

They ought to show more of that. Not just highlights or Super Bowls. Just great random games from the 90s and before.

Brick Meathook

That’s the great Jack Kent Cooke & Joe Gibbs era when the [*Redacted] s were considered the class franchise of the league. Then came Dan Snyder.

Redshirt

Beside the perfect ratio of insensitivity, “its not my problem”, “you’re overreacting”, and just good ol’ fashioned racism, that’s probably the reason why that name got a pass for so long.

“The Washington (fake static)s are a fine organization. There’s no way they mean to disrespect people.”

Brick Meathook

Here’s a Union Pacific Challenger steam locomotive hauling the freight.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GyZD7fJ12WI

litre_cola

Did my wife just give me a bag that is 90% Mandarin that says “I’m lovely peach Foot Mask” and ask if I wanted to give it a go? Yes, and I now have plastic bags around my feet that are kind of wet inside with a peachy odoUr. Have to keep em on for 20 mins. My feet are sweating.

She just said hers are too. It is quite warm here.

Doktor Zymm

If you want to amp it up a few levels, get one of the silky baby foot peeling masks next time. A few days after doing the footbags, giant chunks of dead skin start to peel off your feet in a way that is simultaneously gross and satisfying. Then you are left with ridiculously soft feet.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

God I hate Patrick Beverly. Nothing dirty about the play but still ends with the Suns’ best player in the locker room.

blaxabbath

7-10: USA Basketball plays Nigeria.

I’m just gonna set the tone right now—I think it’s great these nba guys can activist if they want or don’t and good for them for even occasionally speaking truth to power and questioning being patriotism.

But Team USA basketball must eliminate all comers.

So you all know your priorities and stuff but this team better murder everyone at the olympics. Any failure is on the guys who declines as much as it is on those who played.

Or don’t. Whatever.

ballsofsteelandfury

Can these Canadiens actually win the series at home??

blaxabbath

What’s with the H in the logo?

litre_cola

Habitants

Dunstan

NAWT TRUE

litre_cola

Teach me!

Dunstan

Mr. Ayo is correct — the H is for hockey, as in Club de Hockey Canadien

Doktor Zymm

Wait…So they are the French ice version of The Football Team?

Dunstan

Kinda sorta. They’re generally just referred to as the Montreal Canadiens. But the logo is a reference to the old (and technically still official?) name.

Mr. Ayo

le Club de Hockey Canadien.

Those francois are so clever!

Sharkbait

Apparently so

blaxabbath

“These Golden Knights, I call them next weeks line up at Brad Garrett’s Comedy Club because they are bombing out in Vegas”

herodotus450

Vegas shoulda pulled Fluery before the game even started, when they had the chance.

blaxabbath

Their offense doesn’t seem very effective.

This is also the third game I’ve seen all season.

blaxabbath

I turned on the knights game and then got called outside to help plant trees. Fortunately the mrs didn’t get enough soil so I was able to come back in. But then they’re down 0-1 and it’s intermission.

SonOfSpam

Is “trees” a euphemism for “tall vagrants” and if so, how often does this happen?

blaxabbath

No they’re like dwarf fruit trees.

Mr. Ayo

Small, gay vagrants then?

blaxabbath

“Boooo!”

-C. Nassib

blaxabbath

What’s the LC in Canada? I mean, I get that it’s the liquor store but is it government run or just licensed or what?

litre_cola

Old School. Liquor Commission. When there was 0 privatization.

rockingdog
rockingdog

found a funny:

just fucked myself up with the realization that phoenixes and the guy from chumbawumba have the same superpower

herodotus450

ppl forget Phoenixes love whiskey drinks.

litre_cola

They do have Lisztomania though.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4BJDNw7o6so

BrettFavresColonoscopy

I read that as Michael Sam’s jersey was the number one seller, not Nassib’s, and that was a little perplexing.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

To be clear, it was more of a reading comprehension issue than a writing issue.

Horatio Cornblower

My dog isn’t getting his walk tonight because it is cold and raining, and he is glaring at me like it’s my fault. Motherfucker, if I control the weather then why hasn’t a Cat 5 barreled into Mar-A-Lago by now?

Viva La Tabula Raza

And every single other Trump property around the globe, if I were to be consulted.

Horatio Cornblower

I like the way he thinks.
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Last edited 3 years ago by Horatio Cornblower
Viva La Tabula Raza

(Hand twice actual size.)

Game Time Decision

Stunt hands

Game Time Decision

It should just pour rain on him all the time

Gumbygirl

And frogs, and locusts, and snakes….

litre_cola

If he dies, can we give the Scottish ones back to the locals without destroying the places? They have been through enough.

Sharkbait

Quickly followed by an EF-6 tornado. Just in case the hurricane missed anything

Viva La Tabula Raza

“Nassib, huh? Sounds Mooslim to me.”