Good day to you the banner is Skillzy the mascot. Does he moonlight as an underground DJ and coke dealer?

I hope you enjoyed your long weekend and are blissfully off the whole week for the last of our summer of futbol.

We get the Greg Louganis special first where it will be like a diving meet out there with Spain v Italy.

LC: During the prelims there is no way you could have anticipated Spain making it this far as the semis with Morata looking like RGIII out there hitting anything but his intended target. Their games have been ridiculously wild and really good watching. They are maddening to watch as they possess so much skill but aren’t on the same page like the Spain teams of the past. They are here and have 2 more games to win it all so who knows?

DAMN IT I HAVE ANOTHER MEETING.

We’re back, haven’t had to deal with Larry for a while, I wonder how he is doing?

This isn’t old Italy as the [DFO] futbol illuminati have be saying since the start. They are fun to watch and that pains me in the soul because their diaspora loves to tell you they support the Azzurri all the time. They still however flop about to waste time like they have been shot (looking at you Immobile) when nothing has really happened to them. Earlier in the tournament Mancini subbed in his backup keeper in the 89th minute and there was many questions as to why? Well, he is a good dude and gained a bunch of my respect. Back in the day he was the only one not to play for Italy in the 1990 World Cup and said that was the biggest disappointment of his life. He didn’t want any of his players to not experience playing in a big tourney so he subbed the back up keeper in. Huge respect.

This game is going to come down to who do we think can beat England. I think the erratic way Spain has been playing does NOT play well against the English. I think that our only hope is that New Italy wins it in Wembley and the English nightmare continues. 3-2 Italy in a bananacakes game because why stop now?

BALLS: Er, okay my turn. I have really enjoyed watching New Italy become an, dare I say it, enjoyable team to watch. That’s never been the case.  Italy has always been about defending and maybe getting a goal on the counterattack.

Spain,  on the other hand,  has always been about attacking using the death by a thousand passes technique. Their Achilles heel had been horrible defending but they’ve improved greatly. Sort of.

So now you have a great defense with a newly good offense versus a great offense with a newly decent defense. In any other year,  I’d say Spain passes and passes and can’t get it in and it goes to penalties. However,  this is 2021 and nothing’s the same as before.

I say one team scores a fluke goal and it’s good enough to take them to the final. The only question is which team will it be?

/ flips imaginary coin

Spain it is!

HIPPO:  Spain sucks.  Italy is somehow even MOAR boring (don’t forget hairy) than their “we’re just happy to pass sideways to each other” opponents.  They will hit Espana on the counter, as they have done all torneo.  Nobody has adjusted yet, and Spain views “adjusting” as pure apostasy.

Mussolini Men 3, Generalissimos Franco 1

DON T: Italy has been the best team of these European Euros. They’ve been playing the ball forward with gusto, and there’s an overall team atmosphere of togetherness. Point is: it’s unnerving as fuck to be flooded with positive feelings towards the Azzuri. But we’ve been here before.

The 2012 European Euros were held in the land dubbed “Polkraine” by the cornier-than-chowder English. Italy had a team similar to the current edition, i.e.: they played fútbol, not their usual counterattacking smotherball. Mario Balotelli crushing Germany in the knockouts was a nice memory. That Italy team lost twice, on the first game (predictably), and in the final (shambolically), to the same team: España.

Spain, blech. To the delight of Hispanic bandwagoners everywhere (¡pendejos! /*spits on the ground*/), España tWBS’d its way to the 2008 Euro title and 2010 World Cup, winning all of its knockout games 1-0 (source: hate, memory). Then defeated Italy 4-0 in that 2012 European Euro final, and the Spanish media depleted its purple prose reserves to announce a new dawn of goalkakking supremacy. That was their last trophy, praise Allah. As any Latin American will tell you, the world is worse when Spain can back up being uppity.

This current version of Spain, sigh. I’ve grown to like ’em. They make mistakes, but keep looking for goals. I can’t hate unafraid fútbol, even if played by backpassing 5’3″ españoles.

Predicción: Italy 2 : 1 Spain.