#TransformerNuAIDS – Sweeping the Premiership! Lesser Open Thread

Shitting on Urban Meyer’s Jaguras grave will never get old.  Bask in its warming glow.

Will the two fixtures left standing (as of this writing) even go forward?  I have my doubts.  I also don’t really give a fuck, because of what I said last week (Everton being ruined by an arrogant, fat Redshite cunt and his idiotic enabler in the owner’s chair).  Merry Shitsmas 2021, One and All.

Villa/Burnley (NBCSN) is the last match standing in the 10:00 window.  Try to contain your excite.  Desperate Leeds host the King’s Afrikan Water Pistols (12:30, NBC) in the Spotlight Dance, and I could see actually watching that.

Good thing we have lots of bad JV NFL to pass the time, until Glorious Saturday NFL (and the equally Glorious Scotchnaut) come to save the day.  If you haven’t read Ballsy’s excellent “first week” preview, please remedy that shit post haste.

Western Kenfucky (+3) v. Appalachain State (11:00, ESPN)

I mean, have you seen that nightmare hellscape Grimace-y mascot from WKU?  Goddamned terrifying.  I’d bet on them.

UTEP (+11.5) v. Fresno State (2:15, ESPN)

Fresno’s QB decided to stick around, after all.  They should roll, no matter how disappoint they are at their sad-sack destination.  It’s good to know UTEP still has a team, I guess?

UAB (+6.5) v. BYU (3:30, ABC)

Gumbygirl’s Blazers against Original Recipe Big Love!  So many initials, so little time (before Vegas and #ThePauls kickoff).

Eastern Michigan (+9.5) v. Liberty (5:45, ESPN)

As you may have noticed, there are a lot of bowl games.  Is Liberty’s 1st round-projected QB even playing?  Don’t know, don’t care.  Suck It, Libtards!!1111

Utah State (+7) v. Oregon State (7:30, ABC)

Shout out to Hippo payday homeys of Team Secular Big Love State!  And never did I expect to see the day that Niiiiiiiiiiiiiiiice Beaver would be a full-TD favoUrite in a bowl game.  Just go with the flow, y’all.  This is the Jimmy Kimmel gimmick game, which is fairly amusing. He’d like my beat-into-the-ground Niiiiiiiiiiiiiiiice Beaver joke.

Louisiana Lafayettes (-5) v. Marshall (9:15, ESPN)

Enjoy the 15 minutes of this that you watch at halftime of Humps/P*ts.  The Military Industrial Complex commands you!