Your Early Slate of NFL Games Open Thread

Apologize for the tardiness-when there’s no bye weeks it takes a bit more time to put my half-thoughts together.

To The Games!

Falcons/Bills:

Has Daboll finally figured out how to properly use Singletary? I’ve always felt he was the more dynamic player, Moss seeming to be a bit more of a plodder. Devin now has 75+ scrimmage yards in three straight as the Bills woeful running game shows some sign of life.

Giants/Bears:

Behold the mighty Giants and despair-under Judge (who has another year after this. YAY!) they’ve scored 25+ points in a game 4 times in 31 tries! Saquon is now in a time share with Booker and there are no wr’s of note playing aside from Golladay.

Chiefs/Bengals:

You’re staring at the game of the early window, folks. Over the last three games Patty has gone 8:1 TD/INT, 73% passing and has a 9.2 YPA. His opposite number beats him in every category with 10:0, 75% and 10.1 YPA. Thing is, Cincy hasn’t won three in a row all year (hey, they’re a young team coached by a youngster) and they currently have two in their back pocket.

Fins/Titans:

Beware the Waddle today. The Titans D gives up the 2nd-most points to wr’s and this fella has been remarkably consistent for a rook. Perhaps he’s the reason that Tua is giving the team a glimpse of his potential, finally. That Fins D tho-they’ve only allowing 11.7 ppg during the winning streak.

Raiders/Colts:

Wentz is a go but it’s Taylor that makes the team go. To win the division they’ll have to win out while the Titans do the opposite. That’s a tough request because Tennessee gets Houston next week.

Jags/Pats:

Whatever happened to the dead coach bounce that Jack Town was supposed to enjoy? Perhaps the rot goes even deeper than we thought… The Pats lost their grip on the division last week so I expect Old Bill will take out his frustrations today on the Jags-and it will be ugly in more than one way.

Bucs/Jets:

Tampa is strolling into the playoffs because the Jets and Panthers are left on the sked. Poor Zach, given the dearth of talent around him he’s decided to take it upon his wheels to make a difference, scoring 4 TD’s on the ground in the last five. Braxton Berrios who, in another timeline is a billionaire cereal magnate that wants to take over the world, has scored in two consecutive games!

Eagles/TEAM:

What is going on with teams (or TEAM) revolving their qb’s in and out of the huddle? It never works and yet Rivera is the latest to say that he’ll give it a shot with Allen and Heinicke. Philly’s backfield gives weight to the old adage that ‘the sum is greater than the parts’.

Rams/Ravens:

If you have a loved one playing in the Ravens secondary today it’s best to just close your eyes and say a prayer. I’m guessing Kupp goes for 15 catches, 150 yards and a brace of TD’s vs this cast of castoffs. Lamar didn’t bother limping thru practice on Thurs/Fri and is listed as questionable.

Type away…

 

 

5 3 votes
Article Rating
Subscribe
Notify of
305 Comments
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
The Maestro

PLAYOFFS Y’ALL

Sharkbait

Sharkette wanting to watch Sesame street instead of football:

“Ok guys. Its over”

Redshirt

Bengals don’t know how to win.

Redshirt

Yeah, let not get Joe Burrow killed trying to not score a TD, Cincy.

hippofant

Jinxed it.

NotShogunButShogun

Oh I feel the tears…
Magic on my tongue.
How I love to lap them up,
Your sad faces help me co…ohHAI Boss Irsay! Yes…sad.
*just happened*

NotShogunButShogun

*has no clue who I am, thinks I care.*

litre_cola

Jests gunna Jest.

Sharkbait
Game Time Decision

And give up the 2 point conversion…lol

ArmedandHammered

Fuck!

clint greasewood

New Year, Same Jets.

hippofant

Is the whole AB thing funnier if the Buccs win against or lose to the Jets?

Redshirt

Watch him sneak back to the sideline and act like nothing happened.

hippofant

Goes back up into the stands to ask for his gear back.

ArmedandHammered

The Harbaugh bros weekend of fail

Last edited 2 years ago by ArmedandHammered
Gumbygirl

You love to see it!

Gumbygirl

RAMMMIT!!!

Don T

CMON BENGAAAAAAAALS

Gumbygirl

Von Miller did the “I have to poop” dance!

Redshirt

JaMarr Chase!!!

Game Time Decision

50 points so far in the championship game pour moi!!!!

Sharkbait

Fun fact: While 50-10 is not a scorgami, it has happened only 1 other time, and the Jags lost that one too

King Hippo

That’s MOAR impressive, really.

hippofant

NOT FUN

WE WANT SCORIGAMI

SCORIGAAAAAAAAMI!!@!!!!!

hippofant

What a surprisingly ungritty play from Renfrow. Should’ve gone down at the 1.

NotShogunButShogun

I need to clean a bit of the field now.

NotShogunButShogun

Yeah still gotta clean. A NY handy! I remember it cost me more once.

NotShogunButShogun

Please let this be…I love the old yeller reaction (not right in the head).

NotShogunButShogun

Carr v. Horse…come on

The Maestro
ArmedandHammered

O.j. would prefer someone gets cut not quit

Gumbygirl

+1 slow white bronco!

NotShogunButShogun

Ffs…I wanna go home. Goodbye horses indeed!

WCS

Can DUVAL fire Urban Meyer again? Maybe into space without a suit this time?

Brick Meathook

Forget gull-wing doors . . . I need a vehicle with a balcony:

comment image

BugEyedBoo

Maybe they can form a joint venture with Boston Dynamics and make the first mech. For sure it would be a lot cooler than what DoD is spending our money on lately.

Sharkbait

DAMNIT Jaguars! You ruined the scorigami!

Redshirt

Zac Taylor is now regretting telling the Bengals defense to play like the Bearcats defense.

Game Time Decision

50 for NE. Damn

Redshirt

Urban Meyer has set that franchise back years.

NotShogunButShogun

Come on RTD…gimme one last rejoice before you leave LV.

The Maestro

This Pats game is even more lopsided than the CFB playoffs. Who’d’ve thunk?

Redshirt

Confirmed: hitting a Rock Bottom on your opponent is illegal in the NFL.

Sharkbait

Pats need to miss the XP here for Scorgami

King Hippo

Like they are gonna STOP scoring…

Game Time Decision

With your mom
-Bill Belichk

Redshirt

Joe Burrow is missing his nameplate.

Fronkenshteen

Holy shit this Cincy offense is as good as listening to Tony Romo is bad.

King Hippo

Parker gets a yellow card for dissent.

NotShogunButShogun

Between the clots trying to matter and the cfs whatever the hell…I disapprove. I hate this barn enough. Quit trying the pineapple trick.

Redshirt

So, did anyone chase after Antonio Brown had his mental breakdown, or is he running rampid in New York City?

King Hippo

Would anybody even notice a shitless guy running down the street in NY? Might have to let the wing-wang out for some air, to get the attention he so desperately craves.

Game Time Decision

Maybe he can do a Run Forest Run thing and be better after

King Hippo

This is the best spin-off idea in EVAR

rockingdog

Allen please throw it to Gabriel Davis
That would be Rocking!

King Hippo

The Giraffe’s passing line this week might be worse than Fromm’s last week. And I thought that was the worst I had ever seen (for an actual quartered back, not a fill-in WR).

clint greasewood

comment image

ArmedandHammered

One who should fly into the Cuckoo’s Nest.

The Maestro

Are we gonna be crass enough to start a Junior Seau date pool for AB yet?

King Hippo

Under!! I want to bet the under!!!

Redshirt

AB won’t kill himself; he loves himself too much.

hippofant

Antonio Brown has still made millions of dollars more than all of us will ever make in our lifetimes combined.

¯\\(ツ)/¯

Last edited 2 years ago by hippofant
hippofant

So he’ll have spent more money than all of us will ever make in our lifetimes combined too.

King Hippo

I don’t understand why DonT’s Magnificent Tits aren’t just punting on first down.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Because I need Tannehill points.

NotShogunButShogun

Between the clots attempting to be competitive and the college whatever the fuck championship, my schedule is shot to hell. I hate this goddamn barn. NCAA can kiss the entire circumference of my ass.

Gumbygirl

Look out Indy, Shogun is disgruntled!

King Hippo

Know what would help? Fire. Glorious fire. HOLY fire.

NotShogunButShogun

I know exactly where to start it.

Redshirt

Wow! Glennon has quadrupled his passing yards in less than a quarter!

Last edited 2 years ago by Redshirt
Brick Meathook

Brunch?

comment image

Spur

Most of the games are good. If only the Vikings can win today.

litre_cola

Guys, it seems Antonio Brown isn’t stable.

SonOfSpam

/crosses him off list

-J. Elway

Spur

He got the swinger party start time wrong. Honest mistake.

Game Time Decision

I hope he gets some help for whatever is going on with him

NotShogunButShogun

BREAKING: salt is salty!