A sobering thought just occurred to me-there’s only three games left this season. Damn. Well, at least I’ve got the Senators and Sillycuse to watch. Okay, do me a favor and gouge my eyes out. If it was good enough for Zedekiah then by gum, it’s good enough for me!
To The Game!
Bengals/Chiefs:
-Much has been made of the bananas shootout game back in week 17 and how we might see a repeat of that. Can I throw a bit of cold water on that?
-Well, for one thing, Cincy has been averaging all of 20 points per game during their last three while K.C. has been on fire, averaging 35 in their last 5.
-Sure, Evan McPherson has been rightfully given his props for his swagger and coolness under pressure but settling for field goals in this game is going to get the Bengals a blowout loss.
-Is it Tee Time? A fella (Montgomery might be his name?) on a Rotowire podcast noted something that I found interesting. Wr Chase, in his first game with a few teams went gangbusters. Versus Pittsburgh he had 65 yards and 2 TD’s-after they made adjustments for the second game he was shut down and it was Higgins that had 114 and a TD. And it was the same with the Ravens-201 yards and 2 TD’s the first time around but it was Higgins that had 194 and 2 TD’s in the return tilt. No doubt Spagnoulo will tweak things regarding coverages on Chase and perhaps that opens the door for Tee.
-Is Burrow’s willingness to take a sack part of his overall strategy of protecting the ball? He’s had only one interception in his last seven games and that was off the hands of Perine last week.
-Yes, there were 9 sacks taken last week but previous to that in the 4 games prior he was getting dumped 2.4 times a game. As far as (very) recent history is concerned, the Titans game may have been an outlier.
-Can you outscore the Chiefs at home? The Chargers and Bills accomplished the feat but that was way back in week’s 3 and 5. Mahomes is 8:1 with a 9.4 YPA and a 76% completion rate in the playoffs so far.
-Another sobering thought but this time for Cincy fans-they’ve scored but one TD in their last 18 drives.
Enjoy what’s on offer.
Somehow, on the Everton forums, “Dawson Creek” came up. Which reminded me of my long-forgotten observation – they could have just named that show “Teenagers Fucking.” I’d like to hear Jim Nantz say “stay tuned after the game for a new Teenagers Fucking.”
I believe they could do that now with ‘Euphoria’
true dat
Now if the defense would be so inclined to actually do something…
THIS BENGALS DEFENSE I CALL THEM CONGRESS BECAUSE THEY GET THE SAME AMOUNT DONE
Meanwhile Los Ice Giants are getting outscored 2-1 by the Kraken, which is why it’s now 2-2.
WAIT K’ANDRE THANK YOU JEEBUS.
“Joey, you ever hang around the gymnasium?”
Gee no PI on KC
BLEERGH slumbers
yeah, the beefy lady might as well warm up them vocals
That was utter bullshit. There was all kinds of contact.
Chief cb’s-none of them having majored in history-have named themselves The Maginot Line.
Oh….oh dear, that’s precious
Even better when you consider the large German-American population in Ohio
CB1, ancient Chinese History major: “Actually, the Great Wall’s major asset was the personnel manning it, the wall itself was relatively useless where it was unguarded.”
CB2, ancient Roman History major: “No no, Hadrian’s Wall is a bad name, by the time it was completed it was uneccesary and was a drain on the empire’s resources.”
Nickel back, modern German History major: “Well you see, the Berlin Wall only served to highlight the bleakness of East vs. West Berlin, and ultimately became a rallying cry for unification, as well as being easily circumvented by corrupt border guards.”
“Ok, Maginot Line it is.”
Wait, did they really?
That would be magnificent. Like Britt Reid naming himself Bill W.
Let’s see if Burrow and pals heeded Scotchy’s warning on them placement kicks.
Run, Beaty, Run!
chili blowback rumbling, clench yer cheeks
Yikes, when the stadium goes “Ooouuwwww” to the replay, that’s not good.
The away team fans, too.
Chef’s D thinks they’re SEAL Team 6 cuz they just killed Uzomah.
If he had stayed home, he would be okay.
I do believe that I eat enough tacos to have an average of at least a taco a day.
You should sign up for the Taco Bell Taco Club
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o8EVwhikA1Q&ab
Quitter
The Bengals should just wear Zubbas. The pants are just as ugly.
Actual licensed Bengals Zubaz:
Stylish!
Wow, great camouflage for when you drunkenly shit your pants.
anybody else ever notice their hands are so cold that you go “holy shit, what if I’m DEAD?” Just us, Other Hippo.
People with Reynauds are basically zombies
One of our local channels is showing Airplane!, and I just stumbled on the bar fight scene.
Gonna be here a minute.
The ironic thing about Airplane! is that it became infinitely more remembered than the movies it parodied, the Airport series of the 70’s and those movies were pretty popular in their time.
That’s because it didn’t bore anybody
Tyreek Hill scoring for an Andy Reid coached team reminds me of that Louis CK line about slaves building the pyramids: “There’s no end to what you can accomplish when you don’t give a shit about other’s suffering.”
I’m not aware of anything else that Louis CK has said or done.
Slaves didn’t build the pyramids, so you can safely assume that he hasn’t done any research into classical civilizations. He must have been spending his time in some other way.
As I was typing that slaves line I thought about pointing out the recent discoveries have shown the Egyptians didn’t rely on slaves, but then I figured someone here would do it.
Smartest bunch of dick-jokers on the web.
Canada gol. I reacted reasonably.
/woke up everyone from their naps.
Something tells me KC is better than Tennessee and LV.
Advantage, BBQ Syrup. Let’s see how Bowel of Chili responds.
Hipster haggis sounds intriguing
served with a literal bladder of wine
PERFECTLY timed TP throw there – nice!
I saw that too and had the NBA Jam announcer say “Throws up a RAINBOW!” in my head
Well, they got the guy to the game.
at least Rikki’s favoUrite Chef made a TD
CANADA WOOOOOO!!!
Shut Up! Really?
ah, how will Mahomes get out of this one?? … ah, nevertheless!
Andy, you stupid fat fuck!
Won Challenge and lost timeout?
“The yellow line is not official!” I scream inside the art museum as my skin spontaneously peels back from my face
Remember the KSK “Yellow Bar Fail” post? God that was one of the great nights on the internet.
It’s not fair that this post has two sobering thoughts and Britt Reid didn’t have any.
Q1 spot challenge – bad idea, or worst idea?
Cheering for everyone on Cincy except for Eli Apple because I think he’s a petty punk.
I think they should start bidding out the anthem. Ghana pays up? We do their anthem instead.
“Ghana?!” [laughs in Petro dollars]
-Saudi Arabia
Woohoo! 8 yards on the first play of this drive. Suck it, Bungles!
What a Gay breakup!
didja stat that thing I sent ya?
Whoo A-10s!
America: where one will stand for anthem, then immediately proceed to use the Tomahawk Chop.
Gonna hazard a guess that Francis Scott Key would have been OK with it.
[licks tv screen during national anthem] “Needs more flag.”
-Trent Green
That wasn’t a planned flyover, those A-10s were on a ferry flight to “somewhere” in Eastern Europe.*
*probably not true
It’s been well established that Warthogs have a poor sense of direction.
So I bought the 49 inch Samsung monitor and it is going to make watching the game and the comment section much easier with the side by side.
https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B088HH6LW5/ref=ppx_yo_dt_b_asin_title_o09_s00?ie=UTF8&psc=1
Envy me!
post your battlestation thread
Is actually great for work, it can be split into two monitors, so I have work on one side and watch movies and stuff on the other side while I work. Looking forward to baseball season.
That’s what Gumby always did. I think we kept the monitors from his last job as a lovely parting gift.
Update: QB ownership:
47% Burrow
43% Mahomes
8% Stafford
2% Jimmy G
NFL PR: “Hey Tom Cruise, you’re a whore of the worst kind-would you want to extend your brand by doing an intro to the AFC Championship?”
NFL PR: [doesn’t bother waiting for an answer, tells legal department to draw up the paperwork]
Velvet Underground were there first
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dHJY-r54LsQ&ab_channel=TheVelvetUnderground-Topic
I can find no GAMBLOR angles here. Sad but true.
The silent anthem!
here we go football here we go *clap clap*
I need both teams to throw haymakers all day, and Cincy to keep it under 7 when the smoke clears.
*turns on NFLN*
…meh, this “Battle of the NFL Network Stars” isn’t any stupider than anything else they could have done anyway.
Rooting for Cincy
Ditto
Folks.
Am back from Anaheim. Corp insisted we have a the yearly in person again. Turns out we have a credit at the JW and needed to use it before expiring. A complete waste of time. Bunch of middle managers crying that they can’t micromanage any more. We need “A players only”. Just crap that annoys me.
These yearly meetings are notorious for hook ups. I’d never try to get laid at one of these but I decided on Friday to flirt a bit. The HR rep was cute and kind of interesting. Before I did anything really stupid I ran out of there.
I still think “Let me sign the form that says ‘You fine’ ” might’ve worked.
Sensible Spur! No good can come from hooking up with HR.
2022 Playoffs is the year of broken Bengals streaks
Wild Card Round: Bengals lost last eight playoff games including last seven wild card games? STREAKS BROKEN!!!
Divisional Round: Bengals lost all seven away playoff games? STREAK BROKEN!!!
Conference Championship Games: Bengals undefeated in two AFC Championship Games? …uh oh.