Listen. I didn’t ask for this job. I was pretty content to stay in Mississippi, huntin’, fishin’, cheerin’ on our state’s imminent ban on contraception, land baronin’ and whatnot. But Horatio is missing in action, so I’ve been called out of retirement in order to electronically transmit today’s mock fantasy whatever topic: cameos. These can feature NFL players, other actors, politicians, you name it, making a brief – preferably uncredited – appearance in a film (or television show). You know the basic rules by this point, but a few more: appearances on animated shows must be *as themselves* or they are invalid (i.e. you cannot draft Dustin Hoffman for his voice work on The Simpsons. But you could select John Madden). Actors *playing* important figures (like Jeanette Charles playing Queen Elizabeth in The Naked Gun) are not cameos, and are similarly invalid. Now get to work! With his first pick, Rikki has selected Thomas Jane and Clifton Collins Jr. as the Vegan Police in Scott Pilgrim Vs. The World. Now have at it!
Editor’s Note: Horatio is, in fact here, but he has a headache from too much sun and maybe a smidge too much beer, and he is very grateful that Rikki came up with this idea last week, (when Horatio just forgot about Mock Draft Monday), and was able to slide it in, (heh), today. The only thing left to say, as you know by now, is
Stormy Daniels in 40 year old virgin.
I cannot find a SFW gif or clip
Marty Scorsese in Taxi Driver
Radiohead in “South Park” when they make fun of Scott Tennerman after Cartman makes him unknowingly eat his parents.
https://pbs.twimg.com/media/C5YxqUfU0AAAQgx?format=jpg&name=small
The Clash in “The King of Comedy”
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y-LJ0_rOgd8
2. I’m going to make a heel turn and pick Lance Armstrong in Dodgeball: A True Underdog Story
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jGtfpzT4Lqw
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UtGCWDhmYTs
Gumby has pissed me off in a big way, so I’m gonna go spend too much money at Gelson’s. Later, my taters!
Miles Davis as “street musician #1” in Scrooged.
Apt he’s playing with his back to him
Was William Henry Harrison’s appearance short enough to be considered a cameo?
Sticking with a duo, Al Michaels and Bob Costas in Baseketball. Yes, Costas’s “they promised me it wouldn’t make the final cut line” was great, but Michaels as his lecherous self was better.
https://youtu.be/J1fF2tkMUU8
Swear to God this happened. James Brown with Frankie and Annette in Ski Party
https://youtu.be/7_xBT_xavzM
After he was told there was a lot of snow on the set, you couldn’t keep him away.
One more David Hasselhof pick: Eurotrip
W.S. Burroughs in Drugstore Cowboys
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oKPcR3tADXc
Are we doing DOUBLE SHOTS? Yes, yes we are. Burroughs pops up briefly in Laurie Anderson’s Home of The Brave.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KvOoR8m0oms
Ron Jeremy in Ghostbusters.
Genius
Stony Curtis on the Flintstones.
Bob Sagat asking If Chappelle ever sucked dick for weed in Half Baked.
“I seen it!”
Tremendous value.
The Artist Formerly Known As Kevin Spacey in Se7en.
I don’t see the commissioner laying down the law here today so I’m going to get greedy and pick David Bowie and Billy Zane in Zoolander. Both really cool dudes.
https://youtu.be/KeX9BXnD6D4
https://youtu.be/1wf503WoaVA
Mike Tyson in The Hangover, that all time classic documentary.
Stan Lee.
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=HnByuUqMeko
Hmmm. Did Chris Walken have too many lines in Pulp Fiction as Cap. Koons for that to be considered a cameo?
Yes and no. Yes, because it’s a whole segment. No, because it’s not the longest part and it’s not completely attached to the others.
I’ll leave the actual commissioning to RTD, but in my opinion it’s too big a role to be a cameo.
Hmmm. Did Chris Walken have too many lines in Pulp Fiction as Cap. Koons for that to be considered a cameo?
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Billy Idol was fun in The Wedding Singer
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-eLPrrw1pz4
If I say he’s a Thin Mints-loving faux punk, will Moose come back? Let’s try it and see!!
Posted without comment.
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=6eWsFFQP0gA
Phenomenal pick
I absolutely LOVE this movie (criminally underrated) and Soundgarden was the best Seattle band. FIGHT ME!!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7J5H8YzfARE
For my second pick, I’m gonna have to go with the Trailer Park Boys kidnapping RUSH’s Alex Lifeson.
aye, twas the greasiest of greasy capers!
Steve Martin as “the insolent waiter” in the muppet movie was fun…
“Would you care to sniff the bottlecap?”
Kaream in Airport?
Can I choose Kareem in Airplane?
Why not?
/ certainly would never be a threat in the spelling bee.
Flea in the Big Lebowski
https://youtu.be/IQO29ibWvAU
oh, that’s GREAT VALUE
Smoking Joe Frazier wrecking Barney.
Looks like Elise Stefanik didn’t lock down a URL… Ooopsie.
https://www.elisestefanik2022.com/
“Comedian Toby Morton noticed Elise Stefanik missed a related domain name for her website, so he bought it himself. It’s especially useful in light of the mass shooting in Buffalo this weekend, since Elise pushes the same hateful replacement theory as the shooter:”
“If you’re a white person in America today and you can’t be successful, that’s on you!”
-Christopher Titus
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=2XJ7dhofvhY
DeForest Kelley in Star Trek: The Next Generation
Bones made Admiral?
Jesus, they’ll kick anyone upstairs.
Neil Patrick Harris in Harold and Kumar
https://youtu.be/M7bK3w9Mw6w
I love him in that!
Hasselhoff makes another appearance, this time in the SpongeBob Movie
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=brTGAgUYnIc
Since all my picks were taken, I’m going with Molly Ringwald from Not Another Teen Movie. It’s was unexpected, humorous and the perfect way to end the movie.
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=v1uRRcsEsnA
John Hurt in Spaceballs…he has the worst luck with stomach issues
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y-sBROXalU4&ab_channel=GeoWhisper
Pre-President Diamond Joe!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NvbMB_GGR6s
David Hasselhoff in Guardians of the Galaxy, Vol 2
Tom Cruise as Les Grossman in Tropic Thunder.
motherfucker. I was looking for a gif to post with this choice.
Another brilliant choice.
William Hurt in the incredibly undervalued “I Love You to Death”.
https://youtu.be/ql6pYxks6-0
Joe Namath: Vapor Lock
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ym-4Dnqyz-U
Bill Murray in Zombieland.
Carl Weathers, espousing the gospel of the stew going (Arrested Development):
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UZZ8atyryB4
Alannis Morissette as God in Dogma.
Also from the same movie…
Whats his name in that movie about the thing-a-majigg
You know the guy
He always does that thing *gestures with hands randomly *
oh man, this was gon’ be mines
Matt Damon singing Scotty Doesn’t Know in Eurotrip
Goddamn, that’s a great pick.
If I’d rewritten the post after having thrown it up in such a hurry, this would have been the #1 overall pick.
Probably could have done this draft just out of The Blues Brothers, but I have to take Aretha Franklin
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RTXszRHc0qs
Gene Hackman as the blind man in Young Frankenstein.
Winner.
Wait. Wait! I was going to make expresso.
For my first pick, I’m taking Ray Charles shooting a gun at a shoplifting child in the Blues Brothers.
Brad Pitt in Deadpool 2