So. Much. Sports. As it should be. College basketball is starting to get feisty as you’ve got Villanova/Iowa State, Florida/Xavier and Nebraska/Oklahoma going on. And for those that love a parade there’s that as well. I think there was some footy earlier as well. A veritable cornucopia for one’s eyes is what this day is. I do hope that everyone is getting along in their respective houses but if there is drama, you’ve an obligation to spill.
To The Game!
Giants/Cowboys:
-This is going to be horrible isn’t it? Gah, let’s just go over the bloody details.
-Dallas is 72-46-2 vs the Giants all-time and have won 10 of the last 11.
-The Cowboys lead the league in sacks with 40 and Dimes is the 3rd-most sacked qb with 30. Both those totals will rise today.
-Since Dak has returned from injury the O has been just humming along to the tune of 35.25 points per game.
-He’s made his bones recently by picking on backup cb’s so he should have a field day today.
-You see, the Giants lost cb1 Adoree Jackson and some other starters so struggling rookie Cor’Dale Flott and Nick McCloud may get the pleasure of having burn marks up and down their backsides. The latter guy must be a recent callup from the practice squad because I’ve not come across his name before.
-The 0-line has its issues as well with up to 4 starters not being able to play today. Micah Parsons might go nuts.
-Hopefully the run game will be effective because the pass-catchers available are Cager, the dreadful Golladay, some dude poached from the Bills (Hodgkins), ball-dropper David Sills and sorta good Darius Slayton.
-It’s going to hurt.
Enjoy the festivities.
Dad: “Why are the Giants taking too much damn time?!”
Me: “This is your first Giants game in a while?”
And everyone who took Dallas does inside.
/Al Michaels chuckles
Le back door cover!
Garbagedown
Overpaid dickheads get free sweaters, let’s all be Thankful!
Not anymore — Elon Musk
Nailed it!
– B. Walsh
This isn’t giving the ball to Pollard!
Ok, no matter how hard you try a Dimebag just ain’t as good as whatever Jerry Jones is snorting
Just finished the first plate of actual dinner. Going to watch the rest of this game with a drink while I decide whether the next move is dessert or plate #2.
I went extra dinner roll, then nibbly desserts with mixed drinks
I do have some of the mini quiche and stuffed clams appetizers to tide me over…
That sounds excellent, many good options for allocating your remaining digestives space!
3rd and 25? NFL BLITZ!
Peyton Hendershot is my favourite recurring Ren and Stimpy character. Prove me wrong.
If you say he’s your favourite character, I believe you!
Hey, Giants, STOP SUCKING AND SCORE SOME SCORES
Once again, fuck the Salvation Army.
Religious military can fuck right off
CD Lamb is the name of my most conservative investment portfolio
Nawt bad if you can get 5%
Only seeing 4% right now. Stupid lamb portfolio.
I blame New Zealand for fleecing the market
You sound sheepish.
I bought it through my broker, E.F. Mutton
Job I have a first interview for on Monday is okay with me not starting until April or May, I wonder if they would be okay with me not starting until October? Will ask. Think I really want to do this 2 month sailing thing
Well, the lack of depth was due to get them into trouble in the end.
Of course the line is 10.5. Gamblor will forsake me, as is custom.
I can’t even begin to imagine what Daboll could do with a full deck of cards.
Do you know how much say he’ll have in the draft?
No, the internet will not crash, nor will it be made of tubes or become less than 80% porn and cute animal pictures
DID SOMEBODY MENTION THE TUBES?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mQ_k_VG6Syc&ab_channel=TheTubesVEVO
This one!
https://youtu.be/rs9wuaVV33I
Pugs, Peni$, and Pu$$y, the 3 P’s.
THIS GIANTS TEAM, I CALL THEM A CIRCLE BECAUSE THEY HAVE NO CORNERS
Man, I haven’t seen a Penn State product drop something like that since Joe Paterno couldn’t figure out what “rhythmic slapping” meant.
“unstoppable” is a funny way to spell “diving cunt” vis-a-vis Harry Kane.
My father didn’t finish this because he had to drive. I do not, and did.
Gonna need to switch over to water soon.
Vodka is a little water
Jesus, Dallas did everything they could to keep themselves out of the end zone there and they still scored.
Gettin’ Dak’s fantasy score to the HIGH single digits
Low double digits, TYVM.
Wink Martindale looks like the hardest-drinking defensive coordinator in the league by far.
/checks all of PFF’s stat charts
//YOU SAID YOU WERE THE MOST THOROUGH STAT SITE! WHAT THE FUCK!
This inevitable FG drive is so boring and forever taking.
Ist and and goal from the 15 seems like an ideal time to run it right into the fucking line, Mike.
Open another bottle of wine, or make a cocktail? Or maybe a neat Lagavulin?
Yes
Went with some of the last of Litre’s Winter Berry Gin, a splash of Lillet, a dash of orange bitters, and top with soda water. Delish!
Bought a bottle of Lagavulin recently. Why? Because the manager of the store fucked up and ordered the wrong item and can’t return it. She asked me, “I’m stuck with the entire case and I can’t send it back, can you help me out?”
Me: [rips off shirt] “I’ll help you out, ma’am.”
Her: “You really don’t have to rip off your shirt every time you come in here. Actually, the next time you do it, I’m calling the police.”
Me: “But, I really love ripping off my shirt in this store. Ripping off my shirt in other stores just doesn’t give me the same kind of kick. Nobody complains at the post office!”
Her: “Gotta admit, I love your hairy nipples.”
/Fin
I got a standard Lagavulin 16 open, and an Offerman edition I haven’t opened yet and might take to Chi
Gotta say that would be a breath of fresh air at the Post Office.
When I worked at the Post Office, we had a guy who opened his mailbox and pissed through it.
These Vertically Enhanced Persons just can’t get off the pitch on 3rd and long.
What is up with all the power button lookin’ avatars? Summin’ broke?
I’m just riding it out.
Pathetic call
Yeah, I go back with the Cowboys to the days of Staubach inventing the Hail Mary when Drew Pearson didn’t push off at all, and even I don’t see a hold on that.
I do love the fact that the Boys have to score a major just get ahead by one. They’ll probably get it on this opening drive.
If Dak! could stop throwing the balls into coverage and/or to the Giants I think Dallas has a good chance.
Apparently, a blind person on LSD dresses Kevin Olsen.
Is he wearing a knitted tie? That’s totally 80’s! Gumby has a box of ties through the ages. Some of them are rad!
Nah, the true 80s tie is the skinny leather. Still have one!
Hard to find something that matches that chin
Wife: “What are you doing?”
Me: “The Giants are playing Dallas and I’m trying to craft a joke that references Anne Richards.”
Wife: “I’m not going to even to bother to ask who that is.”
/we’re different her and I but it works
But Gov. Richards even did a guest turn on King of the Hill!
Ok, done with my Black Friday shopping before 3:15 pm on Thursday
I love me some Alpaca socks y’all
There ain’t nothing better than top-shelf socks.
“Not a fan of those socks. At. All.”
-Peter Dinklage
Gary Gnu is Gnold!
Sneak, spike, placement.
Guy #1: Why don’t the Giants get aggressive here?
Guy #2: Totally agree!
Dimebag: Hold my beer!!!
Somebody should give Daboll a fitbit. That gesticulating to the ref would be the highlight of his November.
Daboll is my current leading candidate to be clutching his chest on the sideline. Andy Reid is the obvious frontrunner but you get better odds from Vegas on Daboll.
Yeah, I read an in-depth piece on him a few weeks ago, he says he stress eats A LOT during the season, and is up a few stone since summer. Imagine if they get into the PLAYOFFS.
Doctor: [examining an x-ray] “Well, here’s your problem right here-you’ve been eating stones.”
Daboll: “In my defense, my mother never told me not to.”
Doctor: “……..”
Is it possible he is a bird and NEEDS to eat stones for his gizzard? Some sort of endangered EMU mayhaps?
I was actually eating leftovers instead of napping. But the turkey and gravy might get to me in Q3.
You know, you could eat in front of the TV like a bachelor. We missed you!
oh, I kept watching. Just left the laptop upstairs. I am so old, I have teevee boxes EVERYWHERE
Alrighty peeps arriving, time to be social with a side of bartending for myself. Grateful for all you online weirdos. Peace.
Bahahaha Dakerception 2.
Looks like Lamb led that pigskin to slaughter
DAKception. Oh my.
Good things come in threes, goes the saying. He’s 2/3’s the way there.
HAMCEPTION 2: IT STILL ISN’T TURKEY!
All right folks, I’m going to be radio silent for the rest of the afternoon. I wish you all a wonderful feasting, and I’ll see you on the other side of the banquet table.
Nice to know they couldn’t splurge on a World Cup version of the Fox music. BRING BACK THE MLB ON FOX MUSIC, YOU MONSTERS!
Nice of the NFL to schedule a boring game we can nap through.
You Shut Your Republican-Adjacent Mouth!
Jazz bath does NAWT sound bad
probably better than watching a football game where the last 4 plays have been 3 penalties and a time-out
If England loses to us in the World Cup, they should have to behead Liz Truss in the public square
Or the lettuce
No it should be that King Charles has to put hot dog buns on each of his fingers and walk around referring to himself as Sir Sausage-Roll-Hands.
Pretty sure that’s his kink. I mean, that and the human tampon thing.