Wall of Nothingness Saturday Lesser Footy Thread

Thanks the Good Lord we shall have JV exhibitions and flexed NFL goodness next Saturday.  But this weekend?  WE SUFFER.

My brain also hurts, so this will be brief.

Yesterday was pretty great early, with noted sister-fucker Neymar putting the Boiz from Brasil on the board in Extra Time.  But alas, they forgot to defend, conceding a late equalizer and death by pennos.  I am sure Brasil will React Reasonably.  Very, very reasonably.  Ustase are through to the Final Four, where they will play the boring, Narrative-laden Argentines (who sucked out on pennos after blowing 2-nil lead to the Atomic Dustbinz).  Just fucking go away, Messi.  Your cult has no quarter here.

That leaves two MOAR Lesser Flacco Eight contests, Portugal (de Narrativo) against plucky Morocco at 10a EST, followed by the (hopefully) delightful Englen/France war at 2p.  I will have it on mute while doing billable work.  France is going to win it all, FWIW.  Mbappe is just a level above everyone else.  Maybe two.

There’s also Army/Navy at 3p on CBS, with neither service making a bowl.  Who knows, the game could still be good.  It’s random that way.

I will close with a Lesser 2026 proposal.  Since FIFA is too much of a cuck to get on board with my Shithole Countries World Cup, they plan to expand to 48.  Thankfully, the initial idea of 16 groups of 3 (and a 32-team knockout phase) is being re-considered.  That would be awful for TV and for the competition.

Let’s start with the foundation – twelve 4-team groups.  Non-negotiable.  But how do you handle the knockout structure?

Why not be random as fuck?  Eight teams get byes to the Round of Sixteen.  Let’s say you only get a “clear pass” if you get 9 points from the Group Stage (I will hear arguments for 7).  If there are fewer than 8 such sides (as will be the case) 0 you draw for it.  Leaving heavy incentive to play for a win all the way through.  The unlucky crew of 4 go to the play-in round, along with the 12 2nd-place sides.  Random draw for the matchups, except you can’t play someone from your own group.  The Sweet Sixteen is done completely by random draw.

It’s not perfect, but I think it’s better than any alternatives I’ve heard.  Thoughts?  Other ideas?