Tonight, we crown a JV NFL shempion. Neither side is even evil, which makes for a nice change of paces. All in on the Bloodeyes, of course. Because HAIL ENTROPY (and the Hypnotoad). But first, some items of note.
The Producers-ish 500s front office fired the first A-AM shot, firing Hobo Lovie Smith for having the temerity to win Week 18. I absolutely loved how he clearly gave no fucks, and went out HIS WAY, middle fingers waving in the Texan air.
Next on the chopping block? Noted White Devil Koach Kliff Kingsbury. The Qards’ 4-13 skid mark was too much even for Qards’ management not to notice (Bill Bidwill’s sexuality aside, obvs). Who knows what they do with the 4th overall pick, or with their next head coach. I’m sure it will be hilarious, though.
Sean Payton is rumoUred to be playing footsie with the red-hot Donks. I am not particularly interested, because (i) ZERO interest in forfeiting even MOAR draft capital for a plausibly-burnt out has been; (ii) Ejiro Evero is a much cooler dude (and name); and (iii) Jesus, just look at that disgusting, fat fuck.
Now, to the main event!
TCU (+13) v. Georgia (7:30, ESPN in many flavoUrs)
Blood. FOAR. The. Bloodeyes GODS!! Sonny Dykes and TCU are the quintessential American “underdog” story. Dykes got run out of Cal-Berkley for fuck’s sake. I can remember mentioning his name for my Wolven Sort, but so long ago and can’t remember which coaching search it was (and also maybe I am just imagining this). Daywalker extraordinaire Max Duggan didn’t even win the QB1 role coming into the season. I mean, you couldn’t make this shit up, even for a franchise as untethered in FITBAW reality as “Friday Night Lights.”
On the other sideline? Welcome, my son. To the machine. Kirby Smart is like a less evil, but possibly even more competent, Nick Saban. Stetson Bennett IV will no doubt be Grumblelord’s focus on Draft weekend, because The Legend of White Mac might just not be overseer-enough.
But I still have questions. The blowout everyone expects COULD happen, but I think them thar Froggies got more than just a puncher’s chance. For one, they are legitimately good (NFL talent at almost every level), and the most physical “Air Raid” team you will ever see. They also run a 3-3-5 defense, a novelty in the B1G and SEC (completely so for B1G, just mostly in SEC play). I read on The Athletic how Michigan was seemingly flummoxed by this. Sure, I expect Kirby Smart to be better prepared than Lesser Harbs. But it’s still an issue.
Secondly, UGA doesn’t have the scariest offensive skill position players on earth. Especially if their mostrously large human TE is out or limited (ankle owie). If just “power in the trenches” were enough, the Wolverines would be in SoCal to make the Dawgs.
I think we are getting a good one tonight. Famous last words, I know.
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