We kicked off the Premier League under Boo-urnley’s Friday Night Lights. What is the bestest reality check for the confident champions of the Championship?
Oh yeah, a goal from Erling Haaland like 3 minutes into play. To their credit, the Clarets hung in, playing evenly for the next 30 or so minutes. Kevin the Broom left injured, and one started to wonder if sommet was brewing.
Then City of Men got a 2nd, which ended all hope. They added on a 3rd late, then the cherry on the shit sundae – a deserved red card. OOF. August might be a tad rough for the White Lives Matter crew.
Fortunately for the viewer, we get a shit ton more action! Most of it be on Peacock, though. So don’t be cheap.
Arsenal host even MOAR turbulent than normal Robins Hood, to start Saturday off (7:30, Peacock). We’ll probably be perfect 2-for-2 in arse kickings after that mercifully ends.
Next up, a 4-pack for the 10 am window, annoyingly all on Peacock. Litre and I must watch Mighty Whitey’s visit to Goodison Park, but y’all may want to opt for sommet a little less eye-bleedy. Spunky Luton Town away to Trashbirds seems a good bet, or even yeah right’s Cherries home to Fronk’s Retirement Home Hammers. Shit, even watch Team Knifey at home, back in the big leagues! Try to forget they’s playing Uncle Woy’s Palace, though. Ick.
Our first spotlight shines on last season’s happy surprise (Unai Emergy’s resurgent Villa) against the new universal enemy (Bonesaws FC). This is your usual 12:30 big NBC kickoff, so the Peacock suits won’t squeeze your bollocks completely dry.
Back to Peacock for Sunday Funday, though. Praise Beesus host new-look Spurs (9:00), followed by Under-New-Management Chelski hosting the German Elton John and his arsehole band (11:30). Two intriguing matchups, even despite all the late window evil.
Monday Night is back on USA (3:00), but it’s just Men Untied kicking the shit out of Big Lots varietal Wolves. Holy shit, have they ever had a wretched summer. The manager watched the talent drain, got to spend none of the resultant funds, and said ‘adios’ like 96 hours before the season started. Fucking ouch. The Red Devils have bought and sold well, in my estimation. Who knows if they’ll get off to a flyer, though. Always hard to tell. But they surely take all 3 points here.
Lots of NFL scrimmage fun today, too. Don’t be going outside or anything cray-cray like that.
After back to back 11 hour work days, a beautiful walk this morning and a kick ass Thai meal I can safely say this is going to be a short day.
Cheers people! This shit was earned.
Son had a buddy bail on him after promising to help him move to a place 7/8 hours away for school. I stepped in and I await my induction into the Dad Hall of Fame.
-the sweltering elevator
-the sweltering apartment
-the multiple items that didn’t fit in the elevator and had to be hauled up the stairs
-the endless driving
The vast majority of dads would do this without thinking twice but I’m a selfish piece of crap so I really went above and beyond. Once again, where’s my golden bust?
As Bourdain would say: “Now where’s my fucking Emmy?”
Have your wife put gold glitter on her tits.
That’s our Wednesday thing. I’ll not be answering questions about our Saturday thing.
The homeless population won’t be answering any more questions, either.
I moved my oldest between apartments last year. Basically by myself as the oldest “needed to pack” and then “unpack” stuff before the car was emptied every time. No elevator, so all stairs, but only the second floor in both places. Think my fitbit said I did 100 sets of stairs that day. Oh and it’s a 2 hours drive away, so fun to be tired and then drive home in the dark
I CALL GTD A SCIENTIST ON A SECRET CARGILL/ADM FARM BECAUSE HE HAS THE BIGGEST CALVES I’VE EVER SEEN!
https://youtu.be/C8dqCQ2MHfQ
Is anyone “watching” J-E-S-T/Carolina?
Panthers don’t really have a DFO… anything.
Hippo calls them the Black Panthers.
Huey Newton and The Motherfucking News was my favourite band/free information pamphlet from the 60’s.
Columbia House used to throw that band around like it was candy.
Turrible.