Some weeks, I just can’t really be arsed to preview all the Lesser Footy. Especially with the German Elton John up on his cross again, wailing about the Spurs match/VAR fuck-up. You’ve gotten waaaaayyyyyy more than your fair share of oopsie-doodles over the years, please just STFU.
Full schedule is here, talk about the fixtures in comments still. Please!
As y’all may have noticed, we got some good parity going on. For once, there is no dominant – perhaps no even “very good” – SEC behemoth. The deepest conference looks like the last edition of the PAC-(MOAR THAN 2), and I expect a lot of circular firing squad action. B1G remains same as it ever was. tOSU, Meeechigan, Paedo State, and chaff.
October will do some sorting, and hopefully some solid entertaining. First up…
Oklahoma (+6) v. Texas (Neutral Liek WICHITA! – Noon, ABC)
Steerfuckers Derby, Red River Shootout, whatever you want to call it (just not the sanitized, PC verbiage). Okiehoma got their shit pushed in last year, and will be out for vengeance. I’m not particularly confident that they will get it. But heck, maybe we will at least see a few fights. Gotta impress Bessie, you know?
LSU (-5) at Missouri (Noon, ESPN)
Shit or get off the (contention) pot time, for Brian Kelly’s lot. They’re cornered, and Mizzou is very much NOT used to the weight of expectations. Such a wide range of potential outcomes makes this a tasty watch (at least for me). Recall that Eli Drinkwitz was the former/last good offensive coordinator at NC State. I told my Wolven brethren we’d regret letting him leave town, and all agree. Now they do, anyway.
Washington State (+3.5) at UCLA (3:00, PAC-12)
This is a really good/fun matchup, and relegating it to PAC-12 network coverage is borderline criminal. Maybe a microcosm of how shitty this walking ded league has been at marketing basics?
Alabama (-1) at Texas A&M (3:30, CBS)
Another week, another Roll Damn Obituary is queued up and ready to go. Bonfire Cult has a legitimately excellent defense, so the placement men might rule the day.
UCF (+1.5) at Kansas (4:00, Fox)
Lookit Rock Chalk getting some national teevee love! It gets even stranger tonight, just wait. We’ll see how much hangover there is from last week’s loss in Austin, but if the KU quartered back is healthy, I really expect them to roll here.
Okay folks back to the DFO SoCal Weather Board!
Let’s get a 3 PM update. Looking pretty toasty out there, except for poor ol’ Playa, who are fogged in with miserable drabness. Sucks to be them!
Thanks for playing, folks. Remember, alcohol hydrates you and provides 8 essential nutrients.
It hasn’t really sucked at all in Pedro today.
Apart from hearing the Love Boat theme from the goddamn cruise ship.
It’s back in season.
https://vimeo.com/802503902?share=copy
https://vimeo.com/709912465?share=copy
Ballsy checking in from Pasadena:
Brick, It’s BALLS hot out here in the San Gabriel Valley. I went outside for a bit but quickly came back in to the air conditioning, as God intended.
Alcohol is indeed being consumed. Back to you!
Pedro update:
It’s fucking perfect.
Taken from my patio about 3 minutes ago.
It’s toasty here in the Coachella Valley. All of the headbangers here for Power Trip are sweating their butts off in their black tshirts, jeans, and Doc Martens.
PNW Update:
It’s gorgeous here. No earthquakes, no fires, and no water restrictions.
I hear they throw fish there.
Only in season. Many folks wrong think this is a year-round affair. Out of fishing season, no fish are tossed. Only salads.
(Yellowstone caldera bubbles menacingly)
Son went off to school, was in a two-year long relationship that he knew was going to eventually end. The girl moved on/cheated after ten days. Me and him? Tonight we’re both going to get…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wf73xqZvk6k&ab_channel=DSoTM
That’s good parenting!
You’re a good/enabling dad. Kudos.
Good? Meh. Enabling? Oh Yeah!
Let he who hasn’t enabled throw out the first beer.
I’d like to picture you two like Fred and Barney, sitting together at the base of a tree, beers in hand, and saying “Dames. We’re through with ’em.”
This is a fantastic song.
Am I too hard on Notre Dame?
[looks up college rankings, sees that Notre Dame is the highest-ranked one-loss team, and is ranked higher than seven other undefeated teams]
No. It’s the BCS ranking committee that is wrong.
In the spirit of the state moving backwards on pretty much every social issue, Alabama has -10 rushing yards.
I had no idea that the Short Circuit robot did a movie with Ernest Borgnine. You learn something new every other third day.
It sure looks like David Lynch to the right of him, but I know it can’t be.
It’s Robert Ryan showing Ernest Borgnine a movie camera on the set of The Wild Bunch (1969)
“Ernest, you’ve been in [checks Wikipedia] 210 movies and TV shows, I’d like to introduce you to the thing that records your image. Say hello.”
-R. Ryan
ROBERT RYAN: Ernest, this is a movie camera.
ERNEST BORGNINE: Ah, I see. What’s that other thing?
ROBERT RYAN: I don’t know.
Cast
Robert Ryan . . . . . . SIDNEY POITIER
Ernest Borgnine . . . ETHEL MERMAN
Lucien Ballard . . . . .JOHN H. HOLMES
Directed by WARREN OATES as SAM PEKINPAH
As president of the National Federation of Funny Names (NOT to be confused with the Federated Funny Names Association, those bastards), our official stance is that “Kool-Aid” is not a Funny Name, since it’s a blatantly manufactured nickname, obtained under false pretenses.
“Hear me out-there’s a big-HUGE-football game going on between schools in Alabama and Texas. The attendance is close to 100k folks equally split between both states. A wily group of career criminals that all own Austin Minis discover where all the money from the cash sales from the food kiosks are held. An extraordinarily intricate plan to do the heist is devised. Here’s the twist! They pull up to the stadium, unload rabid wolves that haven’t been fed in three days, lock all the entrances and then commandeer a blimp and rain down countless grenades from above on to the ensuing chaos. Wadda you think?”
-Q. Tarantino, pitching his latest project
Eh, Kubrick did it in “The Killing.”
I don’t want any wolves to get hurt.
They’re rabid, they’ll have to be put down anyway-that’s the beauty of the plan.
I’ll put them down.
Those wolves aren’t legit. just some jive ass wanna be dogs. Now roll over and let me rub your sorry ass belly.
Um, Florida State might actually be good, you guys
I found the DeSantis supporter.
The Scots are outing themselves as a contentious people.
I don’t say this lightly, but Syracuse just got well and truly screwed by the ACC refs in North Carolina.
I found this photo very cool.
https://twitter.com/James_Taite/status/1710676072688169066
That’s beautiful.
Hippo is nonplussed with these games (especially NC State’s) so Other Hippo suggests nap time. Gotta last 14 hours tomorrow, after all. PHRASING
“What a win by Oklahoma! That’ll move them up in the standings to just below Notre Dame. And that’ll knock Texas down in the standings to just below Notre Dame.” – BCS rankings committee
Also Alabama somehow moves past Oklahoma but not past Notre Dame.
Maybe, just maybe, some of these teams don’t pray enough.
Feels like tuning in to the end of the Allstate Bowl between tx and ok.