Request Line: Stick to Sports

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly -
131

INT. RECORDING STUDIO – DAY

Ah, so back to normal.

Well, not really.

Oh, shit. What now?

You’ll see. 

INT. RECORDING STUDIO – DAY

The studio sits vacant.  The PRODUCER is nowhere to be seen, and DJ 3000 is in his normal position, lights flashing like a pinball machine. 

DJ 3000: …HE SHOOTS HE SCORES! [looks around] HEY, WHERE DID EVERYBODY GO?

— [VOIP LINE FLIES OPEN] —

DJ 3000: HEY, WHERE ARE YOU? IT’S TIME…

PRODUCER’S VOICE: Hello, you’ve reached [PRODUCER’S NAME].  I’ll be out of the office until March 28th.  If it’s an emergency…I don’t know, call the fire department or something.  Bye.

DJ 3000: AW MAN I DON’T WANT TO HOST REQUEST LINE AGAIN.

DJ 3000 is distracted as another exciting incident happens in the college basketball game he’s watching. He sighs and the ON AIR light comes on.

DJ 3000: HEY FOLKS, IT’S YOUR OLD FRIEND DJ 3000 HERE.  I THOUGHT TODAY WE’D CHANGE THINGS UP AND INSTEAD OF WORKING WITH A THEME, WE’LL JUST WATCH SOME BASKETBALL AND IF YOU’VE GOT SOMETHING – ANYTHING – YOU’D LIKE TO HEAR WHILE WE’RE AT IT, GO AHEAD AND CALL IT IN.  OTHERWISE, I’LL BE TRACKING THE FOUR HUNDRED AND SEVENTEEN BRACKETS I AUTO-GENERATED THAT AREN’T COMPLETELY BUSTED THANK YOU VERY MUCH YOU STUPID TOOTHLESS HOLLER-DWELLING TROGLODYTES. I’LL GET US STARTED WITH SOMETHING THAT I GUESS IS TANGENTIALLY RELATED TO BASKETBALL.

There is no theme for today, other than maybe things that are vaguely related to basketball. But don’t feel constrained – just enjoy the games and if there’s anything you’d like to hear, go ahead and throw it into the comments. Post links as “https://www.youtube.com/watch?PUZZLES

nxtWK and they should embed in the comments after you refresh.  

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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly
Law-abiding Raiders fan, pet owner, Los Angeles resident.
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SonOfSpam

Gary Numan explains why there’s only one free throw

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PXHObgshCK8&ab_channel=GaryNuman-Topic

1
scotchnaut

“Can I request something from The Stranglers?”

-L. Sprewell

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cYQTL-ws6p4&ab_channel=thestranglerstvVEVO

2
SonOfSpam

Sleater-Kinney does not take set shots.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vZA_7FtttRY&ab_channel=SubPop

1
scotchnaut

Double (Three Point) shot!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gRYZijLZR-Q&ab_channel=ThirdEyeBlindVideos

2
scotchnaut

Kentucky getting bounced early again? Shirley Bassey called it some time ago.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yzLT6_TQmq8&ab_channel=WallofSoundRecording

0
DJ TAJ

Not sure is this anything to do with basketball but I do like me a highball, shit, I’ll be right back.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DTLwiaqDrYA

2
scotchnaut

Wemby of the Spurs certainly is one.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XedEne6TXXA&ab_channel=JesusJones

1
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Hah, was thinking this was going to be “Freak on a Leash” thanks to his minutes restriction.

2
SonOfSpam

When I think of basketball tunes, I think of…Quiet Riot?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mxV7cW95O8o&ab_channel=QuietRiotVault

1
scotchnaut

Do the refs cook in the women’s tourney? LSU had 25 free throws before Rice got their first. Rice was only down 8 at the time.

0
SonOfSpam

Terrified of Kim Mulkey.

0
scotchnaut

And her cleavage, apparently.

0
litre_cola

You have Truth Biscuits attention.

2
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

[holds envelope to forehead]

“What Michael Jackson puts on the toast that he serves to an eleven year-old after a ‘sleepover’.”

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g_BeHElKX-o

0
SonOfSpam

also would have accepted “moar drugs”

0
DJ TAJ

I believe that is a Ryden painting behind that there video

0
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

i mean come on

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nK8HWMrAEUg

1
scotchnaut

I mean, we’re trying to be more imaginative than that.

0
SonOfSpam

lol…great song, but also lol

comment image

1
litre_cola

Dammit!!!

0
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Someday Jokic is going to put up this statline.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m8bFT4HsLfE

0
SonOfSpam

The Cars’ tribute to Earvin Johnson

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E0Kv6vxZwL8&pp=ygUObWFnaWMgdGhlIGNhcnM%3D

1
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

DOUBLE SHOT (with the lame front end of the song properly skipped by the Ghostbusters sound editor)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-DpPicOZOig

1
SonOfSpam

Beach Boys singing about basketball if you ignore the lyrics

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N2IwGflp4cY&ab_channel=TheBeachBoys-Topic

0
Senor Weaselo

It’s still hilarious, offensive, and hilariously offensive.
https://youtu.be/HBQ2mjkvYY8?si=DnSgoYfKXcq6qydV

1
scotchnaut

Shaq in his prime, backing a guy down in the low post

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BM_OWaItNJM&ab_channel=Herotriss

0
SonOfSpam

How a dumb coach talks to potential point guards

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dg8Tx1bXRRA&ab_channel=TommyBoy

0
SonOfSpam

chick, dumbass

0
Horatio Cornblower

“This check shreds”

Donald Trump’s attorneys, disposing of yet another bounced payment.

3
Mr. Ayo

comment image

3
Brick Meathook

https://ibb.co/r4066S1

1
SonOfSpam

Jeff Bezos’ ex could easily be on there

1
Mr. Ayo

I was surprised she wasn’t included

0
SonOfSpam

accurate

0
King Hippo

a kickass drinking/mosh pit song, from the “Second String” album

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MknoA6d2koQ

1
scotchnaut

Fightin’ Horatio’s haven’t doubled the score yet on Stetson so the protruding vein on Hurley’s forehead is telling him the team has to run laps after the game.

1
scotchnaut
  1. After their PhD dissertation is done

2 Getting the “and 1” after a foul call

/appropriate times for a Yalie to flex

1
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Blatantly lying in your confirmation hearing and getting appointed to the Supreme Court anyways.

comment image

1
SonOfSpam

Callback to a recent draft…VERY punchable.

0
Mr. Ayo

Wish I knew how much work I ending up doing today before I started drinking. Would’ve saved a lot of time!

2
King Hippo

Some nap-worthy “action” eh?

0
litre_cola

Sure was! Gamblor was not kind to me this morning. We are still up though!

1
Horatio Cornblower

Fightin’ Horatios on pace to win 104-38 and Hurley is about to go into the locker room and tear his players new assholes because they let up in the last 3-4 minutes.

1
Doktor Zymm

I think I found out what happened to Kentucky
https://www.lex18.com/news/we-can-not-stop-him-covington-billboard-of-man-eating-mac-and-cheese-goes-viral

1
Game Time Decision

basketball adjacent

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BfzsMQGqrt0

0
Doktor Zymm

100% chance that Putin blames the Moscow shooting on Ukraine

2
SonOfSpam

Non-zero chance Putin orchestrated it to justify whatever comes next

1
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

My money is on classic Islamic terrorism taking advantage of the fact that Moscow’s ability to exact retribution is fairly limited at the moment.

1
SonOfSpam

Those wacky Chechens!

0
Fronkenshteen

“DAS IS ARROGANT! DAS IS ‘TAUNTING!!’”https://www.instagram.com/reel/C3x2vabrVXM/?igsh=bWNzbmJvazdlbWxi

0
Mr. Ayo

This is really going to mess with our sport naming conventions

0
WCS

Lowratio’s in for a busy weekend, nay, month.

1
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

UConn looking very much like a #1 overall seed.

1
King Hippo

Also, Mister Hat not putting up much resistance. Like in that sauna with Brittfar!

1
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

This defensive formation by the Huskies really has the Stetson Hatters confounded…

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tzwP0d5YcP8

0
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

cut it out uconn that’s mean

0
SonOfSpam

Seger knows the Eurostep is bullshit

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zQOSfqPknP8&ab_channel=ConCherry

1
WCS

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=96PiX9tnMwE

This is proper version.

1
SonOfSpam

He was my first concert…kicked a lot of ass.

1
WCS

My parents’ first date was Lynyrd Skynyrd, and a guy standing in front of them vomited into his cowboy hat.

That’s the only real takeaway either mom or dad has about their first date.

1
WCS

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KtPjIWwpIIs

1
Brick Meathook

https://ibb.co/kyDHj3g

2
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

SUPERSONIC DOUBLE SHOT!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ti1bFMBd6V4

0
Mr. Ayo

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r-uSWAJd9GE

0
Sharkbait

The Blair Witch from downtown!

1
Senor Weaselo

In fairness the lyric version should be its own song.

1
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

This video actually has basketball in it! Plus, “HE’S ON FIRE, BABY!”

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t5ZtotlZ0ug

0
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

But seriously this is also an open thread for basketball this afternoon.

0
Brick Meathook

Here’s a rap song about basketball, which is the equivalent of a C&W song about NASCAR:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2SRuy_ufMoI

2
King Hippo

The Lakers beat the Supersonics! Also, Cube sounds kinda like a ballhog.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5VtDM5jicRQ

2
ballsofsteelandfury

You can’t be a ball hog if you got a triple double!

2
Senor Weaselo

It’s also the official song of getting ready for TANK BOWWWWWWWL!

1
SonOfSpam

Let’s get some Kurtis Blow up in this piece

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_shxzlTRK44&ab_channel=KurtisBlowVEVO

0
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

That was actually going to be the banner song, but I held back on it so it could be part of a DOUBLE SHOT!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LIzPbnIp2QM

2
SonOfSpam

Nice.

0
2Pack

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bp2-c0szaV8

1
Senor Weaselo

Only one possible first pick:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IAJHDiO8Fr0

Edit: WAY TO NOT READ THE BOTTOM. Okay, one other first pick.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gO3cFz53vs8

Last edited 1 month ago by Senor Weaselo
1
2Pack

Oh good a free for all…

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uWiQ6k4HCwo

0
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