Memorial Day Evening Open Thread – Warhammer Style

Normal disclaimer:  if it has to do with Warhammer in any way, Games Workshop owns it.  So do not give your kid a name from any of the lore or books.  Unless you are really annoyed at the kid.

Today is Memorial Day when we give thanks and honor our fine men and women for their final sacrifice to protect this country.  How this would work as a holiday for the Imperium,  I have no idea.  Think about it, you have a military with not millions but billions of troops and command cadre.  You never let the citizens know about Chaos or rebellions, the Astartes are known only as myths “Emperor’s Angels”, but the Empire takes millions of souls from each planet annually.  A lot are petty crooks, the young unemployed, or just anyone the recruiters grab to be able to meet the tithe of people for the Imperium.  Once gone, no one remembers them, except for families, if said family actually gave a shit (they may be happy to have one less mouth to feed).

Of course the legions the recruits are sent to may honor their dead, particularly if they are part of an elite legion such as the Vostroyan First Born or Cadian Stormtroops.  The Astartes always honor their dead, with particularly notable Astartes being entombed in Dreadnoughts.  They are alive upon entombment, usually so heavily injured that even their super human physique can not totally heal from the wounds.  They are memorialized within the shrine built to keep them alive and the Dreadnought in the absolute best shape.  The Astartes within the Dreadnought are placed into hibernation and brought out when needed.  But they go a little insane as they spend the centuries asleep only to be woken up and sent out to fight.  And when the fighting is over?  They immediately are placed back into hibernation.  Awaken, kill, sleep, awaken kill, sleep for millenia.

Obviously the Imperium would make being memorialized a one way trip to a personal hell.  The Eldar have the soul stones so they can be reborn, the Orks probably drink and fight to remember the greats who have passed, but normal dead orks, well they died so they were weak and not worth remembering.

Each world may have a day of remembrance, but it seems it always comes back to worshipping the Emperor more than the soldiers.

Sports:  Possible elimination of the Pacers by the Celtics and for the NHL Dallas vs. Oilers in game 2 of their series.  Pretty sure there is baseball being played somewhere.

 

I hope everyone had a great Memorial Day and that the shortened work week does not suck.

5 5 votes
Article Rating
ArmedandHammered
Mid 50's geek/nerd, avid reader of Science Fiction and Fantasy, manga, Chinese Web novels, and British mysteries, cult movies are my thing (have you seen Jesus Christ Vampire Hunter?)
Subscribe
Notify of
58 Comments
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
Redshirt

“In lieu of our nation’s National Anthem, we will be airing this in honor of Angel Hernadez’s retirement.”

Our long national nightmare (youtube.com)

Brick Meathook

Brick is hammered.

I should note that hammered Brick is a benign Brick. When I get hammered I turn all sentimental and funny. I ain’t got no time for anger.

Tonight I’ve mixed my alcohol with opiates. I have to drive a high powered personal vehicle to my job on a giant crane. I hope all goes well.

/Ron Howard voice: It did not go well

Doktor Zymm

I thought bricks were installed by getting laid with mortar rather than hammering?
Wait, when a lady has sex with you does that make her a bricklayer?

ballsofsteelandfury

Indeed!

Brick Meathook

You better believe it.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

It’s okay that I’m celebrating the Celtics victory with rye instead of Irish whiskey, right?

(note that the bottle of rye has a green label)

Last edited 4 months ago by Rikki-Tikki-Deadly
Doktor Zymm

It’s labeled with THE BEN’s penis?

That can’t be right

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Yeah, my keyboard typed out “grey” instead of “green”. Apologies for vaporizing that with my edit.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Also, I’m in the process of getting drunk and cannot be trusted.

Doktor Zymm

I can’t recall you ever trying to trick me into ingesting highly toxic substances, so you’re at least more trustworthy than Trump or Google AI

*MORE toxic than Malort

Last edited 4 months ago by Doktor Zymm
Doktor Zymm

Hm, still grumpy. More wine? More carbs? Something else?

Brocky

These indiana pacers right here I call them the dust from Jim Irsay’s last party becaise they’re getting swept Indianapolis!

Brocky

Senor, I’m heading back to new york on Thursday, any sights you can recommend for someone who’s visited roughly half a dozen times

Feel free to imitate an snl character

comment image

Brocky

I apologize in advance for distracting you from the hockey

Senor Weaselo

New York’s hottest nightclub is “ErAAAAAAK!” This Midtown East West spot, run by legendary kosher deli owner “Jew” Bajie, has everything: Illegal ATVs, Mike & Ikes, Matt Rempe’s Fight Club. All of this is with MC Devil Hernandez!

Last edited 4 months ago by Senor Weaselo
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

You can check in with my buddy in Park Slope. He might be kind of busy, though – they’re doing a full reno of a place they’re renting.

comment image

Doktor Zymm

Slightly recovered from the ‘work simulation’ by researching components for the horseback riding wearable I want to make, and now will complete the recovery with a glass of nice Zin and some garlic knots that came free with a past shame pizza and got tossed in the freezer for just such an occasion

Brocky

Went to the driving range for the first time in decades yesterday

My dad’s wrist hurts from hitting the ground so many times, and my uncle stopped giving advice after the first hour for so

So like Jeffrey said…

comment image

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

“Yeah, sometimes I get a sore wrist from hitting things too many times, but you gotta push through it.” – Adrian Peterson

Senor Weaselo

THIS SECOND PERIOD SO FAR, I CALL IT A FUTURE SOLAR-POWERED VEHICLE, BECAUSE THE OILERS HAVE DONE ABSOLUTELY NOTHING DUE TO THE STARS.

Senor Weaselo

(It took 12:49 for a shot on goal, whereas Dallas had racked up 14 of them and 3 goals.)

Last edited 4 months ago by Senor Weaselo
Sharkbait

First good call he’s made.

WCS

comment image

SonOfSpam

comment image

Gumbygirl

They booted his ass, this was not a retirement. Good, there has to be somebody better than him ready to move up. He is spectacularly bad at the job, it’s kind of impressive!

Senor Weaselo
Gumbygirl

Mr. Ayo, the Kraken are going to name Dan Bylsma their new head coach tomorrow. He’s currently the coach of the Coachella Valley Firebirds, Kraken minor league, and they are just about to start the western conference final. They lost the Calder Cup last year to the Hershey Bears, yes, they headed down the Hershey highway, butt lost. Shit happened!

Mr. Ayo

Saw that! I’ll be down there this Friday to do some in person scouting.

Game Time Decision

In person scouting is slag for Atomic wedgie, right?
/he was in the clubhouse the whole time

Doktor Zymm

I just did a so-called ‘work simulation’ and I want the last 3 hours of my life back

litre_cola

Were you in Wyoming? That is part of the simulation.

Doktor Zymm

I wish, then I would know it was all just a fever dream

Senor Weaselo

Since we’re going to a wedding this coming weekend in Boston, finally got tix for Sunday afternoon GRITSAWX action, and was convinced by friends not to sit right down the right field line or Senorita Weaselo might kill me.

WCS

McJesus

SonOfSpam

Where you can get drive-thru Christianity?

Senor Weaselo

comment image

BugEyedBoo

.

image.png
ballsofsteelandfury

A certain Redshirt might not ..

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

It’s really good.

Senor Weaselo

Paging Redshirt!

Brocky

He’s just gonna respond with a fan art of a pony crossed with a Gundam or something

ballsofsteelandfury

The Ork viewpoint is interesting. Celebrate those that fought and then died but not the ones that died during battle because that would imply they were weak.

I wonder what they would think of Elvis…

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Oh I forgot to mention that before the Cloud Nothings concert we popped into the discount grocery store and bought a bottle of 19 Crimes rosé that had been marked down from $18 to $3. It now appears that we overpaid.

Screenshot_20240527_164449_Chrome.jpg
Senor Weaselo

Well, take the S&H into account.

litre_cola

I could have told you that!

Horatio Cornblower

Finally got around to booking hotels for a trip to Montreal, assuming I don’t fall off Mt. Katahdin first. Good to have that nonsense out of the way.

I also paid the bills, scraped and painted some of the trim on the house, mowed, raked and removed the cut grass from the lawn, took my mother out for her birthday dinners, and got all the week’s recyclables to the dump. So enough about the troops; I’m the real hero here.

Buddy Cole's Halftime Show

Youppi! knows where all the best places for an anonymous john are

Brick Meathook

But you’re not dead. Memorial Day is for the dead guys.

In Montreal go to Schwartz’s Charcuterie Hebraique.

https://ibb.co/GvMX2Ty

litre_cola

La Banquise for Poutine.

Brick Meathook

La Banquise is pretty good for Montreal hot dogs.

comment image
comment image

Horatio Cornblower

OK, that just made the list for sure.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Also, since all of this is happening in different star systems, the way in which days and years are measured is going to vary a great deal as well.