Halfway through the season I’d turn my nose up at these offerings but hopeful me is just going to ride the waves.
To The Games!
Raiders/Chargers:
Did Minshew win the job or did O’Connell lose it, letting it slip right through his hands? The latter for sure. No worries though, the starter is less than cromulent so we’ll be seeing both through the season and it won’t matter to anyone other than Davante. We know Pierce wants to play 80’s style ‘Grind and D’ so for that reason I think Zamir White has a ton of unrealized fantasy value.
Broncos/Seahawks:
At least Nix has a bit of history on his side in that he’s the only other Denver rookie qb to play in a season opener aside from Elway. Seattle’s OC Ryan Grubb is the latest offensive hot commodity and we’ll see what he’s capable of with Geno and that stacked wr room.
Cowboys/Rams:
That high-powered Dallas offense may not hit the ground running given that they’re playing that nasty Cleveland D in their own back yard. One tends to forget about Amari Cooper but he’s the very first Browns wr to record back-to-back 1,000 receiving seasons. Is Watson ever going to show his Houston credentials?
Commies/Bucs:
I don’t know, Washington-Dan Quinn and Kliff Kingsbury? They seem like retreads to me but once you’re in the club it’s almost impossible to be kicked out if you don’t want to go. So much hinges on Jayden Daniels’ arm and fleet feet. McLaurin will give him all the help he can, being one of only six players to have 900+ yards in each of his first five seasons. Speaking of, Mike Evans just keeps rolling along.
Get out there and type.
GEEEEEEENO!
Yay Jeno Smith!!!!
That scramble for a TD was ROCKINGGGG!!!! 💪
HOX!!!!!
New, coming in 2024, the NFL presents: Is It a Fumble?
oh noes, Hippo ain’t like that none
Some pro wrestling moves going on in Seattle
LEAPFROG!
Austin Ekeler is still alive?? And playing football?? Professionally???!
Jayden Daniel’s kinda can scramble for a 1st down….thats unexpected!
That’s kinda Rocking!
He’s actually looking pretty good, considering the context!
ahem, it’s not 0 points off 1 SEA takeaway. It’s -2.
Couldn’t help but notice Emmitt Smith NOT wearing his Arizona Cardinals jersey in that whatever commercial.
I saw his score a TD for them in-person. It was both exciting and sad.
Now, to see if we can keep SEA out of FG range more than once the rest of the game
Commies defense is as organized as a commie meeting.
not since the early days of barbarossa has the commies looked this disjointed
bunch of galdurn Trotskyite wrecking, ah tell yew wut
Quick! Somebody get me Ramón Mercader!
MUFF DANCE!
It needs a DFO deity, methinks
The Muffin Man is too obvious
Is Kyle Williams still alive?
Booberry Muffin!
Ahh, Booberry Cereal, I learned what fake plasticy tasting artificial blueberry flavoring could be from that cereal. I still associate the color blue with that taste.
just hand it off and take the FG, Jumpy McGee
“Welcome to Raider Naiton, we’re glad to have you onboard! Inside your welcome package you’ll find the following:”
A fella could have a pretty good time in …
Oh, right.
We have MUFF!!!
Need another Nix INT
So close, dammit.
he tried his level best
I like this Raiders team & QB
Minchew as their QB feels ROCKING!
TRUE HIPPO STORY – my oldest HippoSpawn went to Minshew’s alma mater (East Carolina) and is dating a RAAAIIIIIDDDUUUUHHHHSSSS fan. I’m sure they are enjoying the fixture.
FIRST SAFETY OF THE SEASON! DANCE Y’ALL!
HIPPO CALLED IT WOO!!!!!
This first quarter has been a fucking slog.
And the second quarter is no fucking better.
it really is an affront to humanity. You’d think it was being played in a blinding snowstorm, or raining frogs. Some Biblical shit.
Seattle Snatch is vegan
That reminds me. Last week I got propositioned by a girl from *one of* the vegan strip clubs here
D’oh Nix
HOX!!!!
just setting up the safety!
CORRECT!
Nevermind. Stupid team.
Mike Peirera either has COVID or hates Brady.
It can’t be both, otherwise he’d be kissing Brady like the latter does his ten-year-old son.
HAWT
Tippy-toe run for Jayden!
Wide right! Hate to see it.
Miscellaneous placement kicker is gonna miscellaneous!
Booooo. Fuck.
Cowboys-Cosbys :: kidney stone-UTI
Cosbys? Because watching them puts you to sleep and when you wake up your ass hurts?
Oh c’mon, let the Commies have 12 guys on defense, it won’t actually help
I decided to abstain from, well, everything while I was washing the ick off me between morning and afternoon games. And this is going to go super well.
RAIIIIIIIIIII
DURRRRRRRRRS
My son and I have a running joke that the two weirdo neighbor kids are actually porn stars with a website that’s the most popular on the internet.
So each month, I make up a special theme they will be putting on the site. My success is gauged on my son’s reaction.
This month, instead of “back to school”, it’s “Back to Drool”, featuring 24 hours of the sloppiest BJs on the internet.
October’s theme “PumpingKin”
Not Cock o’ Lantern?
No “It’s The Great Blumpkin, Charlie Brown”???
Given the rise of piss in the last year and especially since summer began (I pay too much attention but it’s also so fucking gross) in mainstream porn, I have some ideas for December
My idea was “Merry Pissmas”
Great minds
OctoberBreast is right there for the taking.
OctoberFist.
last holiday before ThanksGaping
Tittyfucking Awareness Month
Creative writing practice with your kid!
That’s ROCKINGGGG!!!!
“Rusty Trombone’s Band Practice” is there for the taking.
Footage of the two weirdo neighbor kids
I want to install a metal detector on their front door and monitor it before they leave the house to go to school, because they have that “vibe” about them.
.
Well played.
First first down by EITHER TEAM!!
My Stroud/Beatie team (Vodka) might at least not get relegated. Ain’t even checking score of Maths Is Hard. Maybe I will have good waiver priority.
Fozz: has Dallas D in his fantasy
I want to watch the game
stupid fuck shit local Fox channel: Nah, we’re carrying the Buc-Commies game
Fuck the NFL with rusty piece of rebar
Yarrrr
nflbites is your friend.
I ABSOLUTELY WILL NOT!
“Stop hate!”
-Hateable Enterprise
The league is subsidized by the military, insurers, and gambling. That is the most asinine and disingenuous horseshit ever to grace a football field.
“STOP HATE”
We did it. We stopped racism.
We did seem to stop Asian hate. No one has mentioned that in years.
The Fear Right’s “China Virus” jokes beg to differ.
If you see how asian wives run a household, you see why.
Let’s see I get the Tom Brady Show and…that’s it?! Haven’t I suffered enough in my life?
No
Like most people who were dead this time last year, Damar Hamlin had no problem stopping the Arizona Cardinals on that last drive.
BANNER
Sound is on the Donks/Truthers punt-a-thon, and will stay that way. Your late-game Hippoese likely less decipherable even than usual
Oh hey, Commanders’ secondary bailed out by a dropped catch!
damnation, any entertainment will have to be….MRSA v. Commies???
Could happen, although it’s probably more likely that Brady somehow gets injured in the booth
Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut the fuuuuuuuuuuck up.
Funny. My phone autocorrects to Shit
in-com-PLETE!!!!!
IN. COM. PLETE!!!!
like pattycake, these two offensing units
*Ahem*
Go Turds. Fuck Dallas.
Someone just fucking kill me.
Is someone Clockwork Orangeing you with the Dallas/Browns game?
Jesus fucking Christ. Even Redzone is playing his fucking announcing
This Hawks vs Broncos game seems kinda Rocking!!!!
Those Hawks jerseys & helmet are Rocking too!!!
Wow, super early Donkswoo, swiftly followed by Donksmeh
suspect you’ll see MOAR of the latter (and tell your Samoan friend Hippo says hey)
WOO!!!!!
So, which one of you poor bastards had to go against Chris Boswell and/or the Stillers defense, and why is only Brocky 45 separate times?
I had the Steelers D but had Boswell on my bench.
Bad Idea Jeans
1) Why would you roster TWO placement men?
2) Why would you bench the one playing in a domed environment?
That league has a really deep bench. 6 players IIRC. The talent at the skill positions drops off big time late in the draft.
I have the Steelers D in the Lowratio league. Only 12 points, which seems wrong.