There are three contests on offer-let’s take a looky-loo.
To The Games!
Rams/Cards:
With Nacua out early in the game last week Kupp had an insane 21(!) targets. So I guess the latter is going to get overworked until he goes down with another wear and tear injury then? As a football guy he’s not exactly a spring chicken. Ever notice that these wr’s that rack up insane catch totals tend to get injured the following year? Kupp and Michael Thomas come immediately to mind. Perhaps the pigskin should be spread to Robinson and Tyler Johnson-just a thought. I’ll bet Harrison Jr wants a do-over on his debut-three targets and a dropped pass?
Steelers/Broncos:
Fields responded about as well as he possibly could have last week, hitting the 74% mark on completions and doing the usual running for 57 yards. Najee is a notoriously slow starter in the month of September (46.1 avg.) but was able to turn that around with a 70+ effort. Ballhog Pickens had 85 yards receiving, the rest of the team combined had 71.
Bengals/Chiefs:
This is a fantastic game two years ago. Burrow didn’t look good last week but he was missing some weapons. In related news, Tee Higgins is incredulous that some folks would think that he’s faking an injury. He’s out again today. Start Xavier Worthy at your own risk-he had remarkable production but that was on three touches and a completely blown coverage assignment. Kelce needs just seven receptions to tie Gonzo for the career mark. To say that K.C. got lucky at the tight end spot, having two all-timers over the last twenty years, is an understatement.
Do your thing.
Bo Nix — the JP Losman of the 2024 draft class!
NIX PIX!!!!
BEAUEX PIX
FAT GUY TD!
Aw hey, look at Nix getting a self-esteem boost!
Aww, that didn’t last long
#FixNixPix
I’m pretty overjoyed that only two weeks into the season and I no longer have to worry about the Raiders going 0-17.
They’re gonna drop the Falcons.
“Mr. Trump was on the course, a few hundred yards away, when Secret Service personnel opened fire on a suspect, who fled the scene in a vehicle and was later taken into custody, law enforcement officials said at a briefing. A rifle with a scope was recovered from the bushes, officials said, along with a camera. A Secret Service representative, Rafael Barros, said it was not yet clear if the suspect had fired any shots.”
I wonder if this is going to turn out to be another dumb kid who thinks spree shooting is too easy? It’s entirely possible that taking shots at Trump is going to be the new fashion for those types so they can prove they’re better than the aural assassin
That’s what happened here.
Some Gen-Z or whatever is going to see themselves as the next Princip somewhere, and see an opportunity and exploit it.
This is in Florida right? Probably just Florida Man trying to find a ground hog, possum, or squirrel to fill the pot. And he was just awestruck being near his idol.
If the next two assassination attempts are thwarted because some kid started his live-stream too early, I’m good with that progress.
Jesus christ, another assassination attempt on Trump? WTF?
Consequences of his actions. He started the MAGA Train; buy the ticket, take the ride.
No sympathy.
Ditto. Reap what you sow
Absolutely. Genuinely confused now about hoping for third time being the something something
I admire your restraint.
He keeps setting them up so they can fail and he gets a bump in the polling numbers.
Surprisingly, there wasn’t much of a bump last time. Who knows now?
It’ll get even less interest; he wasn’t even shot at.
[shrugs]
It’s a sign that he should probably retire from politics, but otherwise nobody really cares.
Seriously. Two people were willing to risk death to take you out. Take a fucking hint.
GOP: “It is outrageous to suggest that us stirring up hatred against Haitian immigrants is in any way linked to bomb threats.”
Also GOP: “These assassination attempts are the Democrats’ fault for presuming to run against Trump.”
Sometimes you need to get a quick easy score to kind of get your mojo back.
I suggest whoever needs that advice should maybe assassinate JD Vance.
The youtuber puppet who is a fictional character, Jerry Dee Vance, tuna upholsterer.
If someone does assassinate Vance my first suspect would be Trump. Because Vance is fucking killing him.
Yep. But hey, he made his pick, gotta stand by your decision. LOL, like he has ever stood by his decision. I would love to see him panic and dump Vance just before the election and bring on Loomer as his VP choice.
Kyler Murray and Marvin Harrison Jr. are leading a hell of a comeback for Heather’s Horrible Hikes, (named after our favorite Blair Witch tour guide), and I may have to take back a lot of terrible things I’ve said and thought about Yahoo’s drafting.
Only the Bengals can turn running out the clock into a stressful situation.
I laugh in Jaguras at you
Two thing, Lahey. Put some fucking pants. And fuck off.
You frig off, Blax.
Oh hey, I picked the Chargers, not the Ravens! Still alive!
Avoided the Bungles last week, then walked right into the stupid Ravens. Dammit.
Femur drums rumble in the distance
Likewise.
31-3… Qards?! Over the Rams?!
It got out of hand early.
So long as their health keeps up, these Cardinals can make some noise!
Everyone looks fat in away whites.
I look fat in any color, including clear.
Totally. Ask nuns 🤣🤣🤣
Especially after Labor Day, tsk tsk
The AC is back together, runs fine, and as an unexpected bonus, we have two extra screws we can use for other things!
LOLRatbirds, damn it WVU, let’s go Stillers…
Haldo
The Chiefs misunderstood Coach Reid saying he wants another turnover.
I think the Panthers finally broke Bryce Young.
https://dailysnark.com/2024/09/15/bryce-young-looked-like-he-was-crying-as-fans-booed-him-during-loss-vs-chargers/
making a HARD run at worst trade since herschel
Bryce Young to Miami for a 3rd. Who says no?
you mean 3rd…day pick?
Yeah, I wouldn’t give up more than a conditional 6th for that disaster pile of quartered backing.
hey now its our QB with a concussion not the GM
That’s fucking brutal. That team is one of the worst I’ve seen in a decade.
He seems like a good dude but they threw him into an impossible situation.
That O-line is horrible. Fraid he is going to be another David Carr, way too skittish behind the center.
Poor guy never had a chance.
Probably kept up for half a mile.
Being a high first round pick is definitely a mixed blessing, especially for QBs
My word! I haven’t seen a Chief run that fast since the Battle of Ulundi!
You’re not Xavier Worthy
Fuck you
Praise BLEERGH from who all blessings flow
Oh, BLEERGH, why this thou forsake me repeatedly?
WHO’S READY?!
HI is for Hawaii
“No, HI is for HI I’M MARK DAVIS!”
I hear you surf now.
He’s Moondoggie.
He gets to hang with Frankie and Annette now?
THEY’RE EATING THE MOONDOGS!
Well, I ride the waves. “Surfing” makes it sound like I’m so obtuse I think I can control the Pacific…
And brandy + gummy = 🙃
I miss weed.
This is one of those countries that don’t fuck with the devils lettuce.
I’mma get high as a motherfucker if I ever decide to go home.
There’s hope for them. They legalized abortion, who woulda thunk it?
Took em long enough though!
Scoot over to Amsterdam
Next time.
Fuck me this place is wonderful.
‘Tis.
Feet drag catches make America great. That is all.
The next toe drag catch this afternoon will surely Make America Great Again!
TD YOSHI!
Shot of Swift = Mahomes INT
Shot of Swift=Trump getting shot at again
HI SECRET SERVICE
HOW DARE YINZ MOCK OUR SACRED SALUTE
Man. The Rams suck.
Fatty put all his weight behind that throw!
If you live in Monterey County, why are you advertising to Non-Monterey County people to come to your neighborhood?
Chiefs…no…gain?
fucking lol
(fyi this is at the stillers/donks game, making it even funnier)
.
RAMMIT may want to cover this Harrison kid a little better.
Donks new jerseys are better but if they went with the light blue instead of navy would’ve been a better choice
You know what? If Tom Brady wants to star in a commercial that explains siting in a booth rambling pre-AI statements is the same kind of *work* as being a professional athlete — I’ll gladly buy it.
I sat Burrow for Fatthew. I’m not good at this.
You’re beating my ass so bad, I could call you Adrian Peterson.
I was whoopin’ Horatio last week too. And I lost.
He had the Luck O’Lowratio on his side. My bench almost has as many points as my starters.
No one is good at this, that’s what makes it that perfect combination of infuriating and fun!
HOX!!!
Never a doubt!
Now let’s see how the Bungles and DONKS will entertain us.
holy fuckballs do I hate this Donks kit. No WOO!! whatsoever.
I like how they made me feel super SMRT for putting in Charbonnet and sitting Chase Brown
MHJ is announcing his presence with authority.
Marv got better
ratbirds 0-2 is not that big of a shock
but losing to the damn raidaahhhss?!
Wait, WHAT?
OH YE OF LITTLE FAITH
Getting my butt kicked in my superflex league to the point where I’m 11% to win with 6 players to go. Fully expected to lose this week so don’t actually mind Kamara making it a blowout
Stroke of luck as Mrs. Horatio decided that some pieces of the AC weren’t up to her standards of cleanliness, (I mean really, “black” mold! Why are we even bringing race into this), so she took them further apart and cleaned them so now if I can’t get the AC back together it’s her fault.
You will be able to get it back together.
All thanks to a clean rod.
Ah shit. The parts she took out just snapped right back into place. We’re down to the carnage I left behind.
Welcome to the 4th Annual Bengals Must Win Week 2 Game against the…
(checks notes)
…of course it’s them.
Shooting at Trump International Golf Club?
How does the Secret Service know the shooter wasn’t just targeting one of the foreign agents who are frequently in that orbit?
having a candidate living in the capital of Florida Man is not the best idea
We keep trying to have him killed there but this nation doesn’t take HAVING GUNZ seriously enough, outside of our schools.
I got a ‘breaking news’ email from the NYT about this and the preview read “trump is safe..” so I immediately knew there was a shooting in his vicinity. Should be good for his possible PTSD
I like that the dude was shot in the ear and cried, “Harris and all these people are getting me targeted!” and that was met with less belief or interest in conversation than, “THEY ARE EATING THE CATS!”
Something something “shooting a 78 at one of Trump’s golf courses”
Are any of the groundskeepers Haitian?
I think so – they displaced the Scots they had previously been using. Leading to eternal enmity, of course.
hey, saints/cowboys was scorigami
Arizona Cardinals, Week 2 Opening Kick: “How does this thing work agai — oh shit he’s coming right at us!”
Unfrozen Caveman did mostly a good today and Kyle Shanahan’s playcalling (and to be fair, shitty execution by Purdy) doomed the Niners. What a weird start to the season.
CMC is everything.
To really fuck up Tee, Trump needs to post, “I BELIEVE TEE HIGGINS!”
The only tees that Trump believes in are the ones he uses to prop up his ball when he’s playing from the mud.
Wifey and oldest are at an opera at the oldest indoor theater in the world. I’m killing time at a fest downtown. It’s tough.
Dancing girls are making me tired…
Found better music, but worse visual.
Rock, folk. Meh…
That’s good exercise!
They were bouncing around for a good 20 minutes.
I love dancing
LOVE IT!!