Your Thursday Night NFL Football Open Thread

Welcome back folks and folkesses! This game may not be very many people’s cup of tea but we were gifted a 5 game late slate and two games on Monday night so the universe is just righting itself again. These Giants and Cowboys-I don’t think they’ve ever both been good at the same time for any extended period of time? NY was horrible in the 60’s and 70’s and then when the Parcells era came along Dallas was in their post-Staubach phase. Then when Jimmy Johnson came around the Giants were handed off to Ray Handey. I guess there was a period when Romo and Eli co-existed-that was fun. Ah well.

Notes:

Foot In Mouth Disease?:

I think that’s what Deshaun Watson might have. Commenting about designed runs he ventured-“I’m not a running back”. Well, listen, when you’re playing as badly as you are somebody should be advising you to say you’re all about the team and you’ll do anything to win. Thing is, he leads the team in yards per carry and actually has more total yards after contact than Jerome Ford on far less carries.

Back In The Folds:

That would be one KHunt. He’s been elevated from the practice squad to the 53 man roster. It was a long six years but we’re all aware of Andy’s philosophy when it comes to players, “The devil you know”.

To The Game!

Cowboys/Giants:

-not looking forward to this-it ain’t pretty

-Dak is 12-2 vs the Giants

-Dallas has won six straight and is 13-1 in their last 14 vs this squadoo.

-Lamb only has 13 grabs so far but Deonte Banks isn’t a #1 cornerback but he plays one on the Giants defense. I was hoping that Adoree Jackson could catch time in a bottle and help to bottle him but he’s a scratch this evening.

-Dallas has trouble running the ball-I guess that’s what naturally occurs when you go “All In” with a Zeke/Rico backfield.

-Dimes has gone two (2!) whole games without tossing a pick.

-The Giants D hasn’t sacked a Dallas QB since December 19, 2021.

-89-17 was the combined score between these teams last year.

-Singletary will rush for a TD and fumble the ball for the third straight game because that’s what he does.

Have a good time out there. I won’t.

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Horatio Cornblower

As a frustrated Whalers fan I’d like to extend a hearty “fuck you” to John Fisher, and to paraphrase Stephen King, I hope you get stomach cancer while trapped in a part of the world that hasn’t discovered morphine.

Sharkbait

I think the Coyotes really are the only franchise that has a legit excuse for moving. The As situation is hot garbage.

Horatio Cornblower

Oh yeah, the Coyotes are simply a failed franchise all the way around.

WCS

comment image

Never forget

fleshwound_NPG

nordiques are the other one

-shit-tier franchise (sadly, became great at the 11th hour)
-small market facing quickly increasing salaries
-that small market? ultra-french speaking
-weak canadian dollar in the 90s

hell, the lindros trade involved 15 million in cash, and they burned through it in just a few years, and were still facing massive debt

Horatio Cornblower

I was never sure how an NHL team in Quebec was supposed to compete with the Montreal Canadiens.

And it turns out they couldn’t.

herodotus450

Unfortunately your “fuck you” got stolen out of the Oakland parking lot before John Fisher could receive it.

fleshwound_NPG

THIS GAME LEMME TELL YA I CALL IT THE 1991 LAPD RODNEY KING VIDEO BECAUSE THERE ARE SO MANY KICKS

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Yeah I gotta be honest watching hurricane coverage is more interesting than this game.

WCS

There’s a meteorologist tracking Helene who could be Seth Rogan’s character from The League.

Sharkbait

Not for nothing, Daniel Jones has looked pretty decent tonight

Horatio Cornblower

He’s playing Dallas.

WCS

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_QIamHMnN3c

Merry birfaversary, Gumbygirl

Sharkbait

My go to Cult song. Thanks GTA: Vice City!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cts0VN1-wgk

litre_cola
2Pack
Unsurprised

Was your cut-to-commercial music Gangnam Style? No? Spanish broadcast, dudes.

Unsurprised

I should’ve gone to the picture show

Spur

Watching this game is punishment

Sharkbait

We’re all masochists

Don T

Game recap
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SonOfSpam

Why is every kicker except Justin Tucker awesome now?

fleshwound_NPG

it isnt cold and windy yet, FOOTBAW WEDDER starts around oct

Doktor Zymm

Mad respect to the Bills for building a new stadium that IS NOT a dome

Col. Duke LaCross

The Bears gave Cairo Santos 7 million a year for a hard cap of 52 yards.

WCS

Forgive me since I’m tardy to the pardy, but is it GumbyGirl’s sun lap-a-versary?

SonOfSpam

Yes, to celebrate they’re seeing The Curt.

Don T

They do a strong 9 minute set.

SonOfSpam

“Wow, that’s some kinda endurance!”

-R. Pitino

ballsofsteelandfury

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Unsurprised

GOD FUCKING DAMN IT

Doktor Zymm

For a close game this is fairly lackluster. How funny is it that the Turkish government bribed Adams to get around fire regulations?

Sharkbait

THATS the bribe??

Unsurprised

A pallet of Zyn worth $50,000, dude.

Sharkbait

Politicians are surprisingly cheap to bribe

Unsurprised

Understatement of the millennium

Horatio Cornblower

You have to take into account that Eric Adams is one of the dumbest motherfuckers out there.

Doktor Zymm

Wait, the snus things?

WCS

I thought “Zin” as in wine?

Now, I’m even more baffled.

Doktor Zymm

These dealys: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Snus

I remember they were huge the first time I visited Sweden, tried em out and didn’t see the appeal. It’s basically chewing tobacco but nicely contained so you aren’t as gross and spitty

WCS

I know what snus is… I didn’t know there was a black market that sadly in demand.

Doktor Zymm

ah yeah, totally with you there

Unsurprised

Yes

Doktor Zymm

That’s…..just bizarre. Now I’m imagining him personally going around to bars asking people if they want to buy them because they totally fell off the back of a truck, lol

BugEyedBoo

Corrupt cop? NFW.

BugEyedBoo

Ex-cop, my bad.

Unsurprised

They’re like Marines. They never stop being pigfucking. cocksuckers.

yeah right

Downtown LA. Orpheum Theater.

Lovely fucking night for a show.

SonOfSpam

James who?

Johnny Marr is cool though.

yeah right

He’s opening tonight. James closes.

SonOfSpam

Enjoy! Saw Johnny Marr open for The Killers, he was great.

litre_cola

I believe it is pronoUnced Ha-Mez in LA.

King Hippo

I am starting to question some of my life choices. As should Brian Daboll.

litre_cola

Every damn day.

Bogdanski

That’s the fuckin “bugaboo” about his whole career, Al

Sharkbait

GO FOR IT!

Unsurprised

Fifty K in Zyn. Fucking cops.

Sharkbait

Not gonna lie, I’m kinda digging snarky “dont give a fuck” Al Michaels tonight

Unsurprised

You know there a Spanish-language option, right?

Don T

And without
-gimmicky graphics
-credit counseling ads
win win

Sharkbait

I just need Mrs. Sharkbait to watch with me so she can tell me what the fuck the commentators are saying.

Don T

They’ve been flogging to death the Cee Dee Lamb stuff, but otherwise ye mm nhe

Sharkbait

This game is the definition of FLAGKAKKE!

Last edited 1 month ago by Sharkbait
King Hippo

Do I likey Charissa Thompson in a power suit?

Yes, Hippo likey Charissa Thompson in a power suit.

/bare shoulder season had to end sometime

ballsofsteelandfury

She dresses REALLY well. All her outfits compliment her.

King Hippo

100% agreed. As an older pervert, I truly have started to appreciate fashion sense MOAR.

litre_cola

Starter jacket and Zubaz are still cool right?

SonOfSpam

Wait, since when are we PRO-clothes?

fleshwound_NPG

mike mccarthy and myself have one thing in common: we are about to enjoy a tub of ice cream in a few minutes

Gumbygirl

I was supposed to get a birthday cake from Duff Goldman today, but it’s not coming until the1st now. I do have ice cream, so yay?

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Any kind of a story behind that, or was it just something you ordered?

Gumbygirl

My SIL ordered it for me. I’m this old
https://youtu.be/HCTunqv1Xt4?si=hsHQh_GeU8zZbOZ1

Don T

Happy birthday!

Doktor Zymm

Happy 8 squared!

Gumbygirl

Thanks!

litre_cola

Times have changed. I just said aloud “Ooh Bucs Falcons next week, nice.”

Unsurprised

My condolences

Don T

I had that same reaction. Then got joled by a Carnhartt ad.

BugEyedBoo

Important halftime news: my wife made a hot dish out of sausage instead of ground beef and it was awesome! I could live off of that. Not very long, mind you, but…

litre_cola

Hot dish? Minnesota no?

BugEyedBoo

No. I have Walz to blame.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I haven’t had enough beer to be able to enjoy BEERGHFEST ’24.

Doktor Zymm

Well get on it then!

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

That’s tomorrow night, when I’ll be home alone.

Spur

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fleshwound_NPG

al michaels is ready to murder a bitch right now

Doktor Zymm

Alternative pro-bowl idea: The refs play football and the players officiate

Doktor Zymm

There are 121 officials, so they could totally field 2 53-person rosters even leaving out a few, and they could play flag

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

No, tackle. I want to see Hochuli clothesline somebody.

jjfozz

another idea: The Germans rebuild the Atlantic Wall, specifically the portion above Normandy. NFL players man those fortifications, and the refs must storm the beach, with only flags for ammunition

Doktor Zymm

Some good hang time on that first flag

fleshwound_NPG

BLEERGHKKAKE

Spur

this game is going to end at 2am with all these flags

litre_cola

So many flags for the flag god!

fleshwound_NPG

score

DAL – 14
NYG – 9
BLEERGH – 69

LemonJello

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jjfozz

Is Eli allowed to watch his old team play or does it get him all revved up and too wired to sleep?

LemonJello

Olivia just cuts his chocolate milk intake by half on game days.

LemonJello

And only regular Oreos, no double stuff.

WCS

*CERTAINLY* not after 16:00.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Assuming he hasn’t already negotiated away his chocolate milk rights for the rest of the week by Tuesday, which is fairly common.

Doktor Zymm

D’oh!

litre_cola

Totally forgot I took an edible an hour ago. What triggered me is decilitre eating a fruit salad and was thinking I could go for that.
Guess it worked like a charm.

Doktor Zymm

It’s a surprise from past you!

litre_cola

Better than the vodka beside the bed that drunk me has left hungover me. Happened once and only once.

Doktor Zymm

I can see that being disastrous, what with vodka looking a whole lot like water and all

fleshwound_NPG

sun rises in the east
sets in the west
we are born
we die
we pay taxes
cowboys taking too many penalties

jjfozz

My wife had a rough weekend last week, and went to brunch with her friends.

So I can up with this nutty idea:

“Let’s call mom and tell her I was taking the turtle tank to the bathroom, dropped it, and all the water is coming down the steps.”

My son said, “Jesus Christ, what is wrong with you?”

Horatio Cornblower

Once my wife was in the bar up the street with a bunch of the other Little League moms and I brought my kids up and sent them with instructions to pretend they were crying and say “Mommy please stop drinking and come home!!”

They did it, too.

Spur

Micah is back for Dallas. Good as new

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LemonJello

You’d think with the name “Hooker” you’d be good at handling balls…but I guess not.

Spur

my mind went right to “packing a musket”

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8mprjD74T90

SonOfSpam

Ha, in your face Scotchy, Singletary only ALMOST fumbled.

Spur

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jjfozz

Rings of Power is a river of shit.

BugEyedBoo

Absolutely gorgeous, but total crap. What they get for spending $50M or whatever for the contents of J.R.R. Tolkien’s trashcan.

Horatio Cornblower

I’ve never seen it, but isn’t it supposed to be based in The Silmarillion?

Spur

Damn that hurricane went from Cat 1 to 4 in 12 hours.

Republicans response:

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King Hippo

Just so long as it takes out the most GOP parts of Florida.

Redshirt

.

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King Hippo

Emmett Smiff pees his pants? GOOD 2 NOE

Spur

Guess the taunting flag was the 1st make up flag for NYG

Spur

that’s taunting now?

jjfozz

CeeDee Lamb, showing their lots of ways to act like an asshole.