Your Second Round of NFL Games

As I write this the Jets are losing and Qaron is all shook up. Life’s been good to me so far this Sunday!

To The Games!

Ravens/Bengals:

Here’s a stunner-Henry leads the league in rushing after four weeks. If he can avoid injury I don’t see him relinquishing the lead the rest of the way. It looks as though Baltimore has abandoned the tight end spot as far as the offense is concerned-Andrews has no catches the past two weeks and Likely has just 56 yards receiving in the last three games. From famine to feast-wr Chase is only the 5th player to reach 4,00 yards and 30 TD’s in his first 50 games.

Colts/Jax:

Richardson was in pads late in the week but he’s listed as doubtful. More Flacco means more opportunities for both Pittman and Downs who each scored a TD last week. Progress! Trey Sermon is your Indy rb and that’s a long way down from Taylor. Lawrence has enough of his own problems, he doesn’t need his skill guys dropping over 12% of his passes.

Fins/Pats:

You thought it was impossible but Huntley threw for less than 100 yards last week. Tyreek has never scored a TD in a game that Tua has not started. Mostert has been removed from the injury report so that Miami backfield situation is all kinds of muddled. Rhamondre has dipped quite a bit from his two 100 yard outings to start the season-all the way down to 33 yards total. With qb play being so bad, he’s seeing a ton of heavy man fronts.

Browns/Commies:

Watson can look across the field and see what he once was. If he’s ever going to regain form it should be against this 30th ranked secondary. Amari is feeling the pain as well, he’s got a 43% catch rate-he’s got be frustrated. The Commies backfield is up in the air what with Robinson’s status, Ekeler concussed and the slight emergence of McNichols.

Bills/Texans:

Beware Flying Balls! Also, Beware Revenge Game Narrative! (we seem to have one every week) Just curious, why do you sign Curtis Samuel and not play him? He’s participated in just 30% of all offensive snaps so far. With Shakir out look for Kinkaid to be involved more. Wait! A relevant tight end-what does that look like?

Panthers/Bears:

Old Man Dalton has actually given Carolina some life. Both Diontae and rook Xavier Legette have TD’s to their name now. Chicago’s pass D has been fairly stalwart so far this season so maybe the optimism comes to a grinding halt like it does everywhere all the time. I guess that just means more work for Chuba. He’s up for it, having crossed the 100 yard mark in his last two games. Swift temporarily stalled the Roschon Replacement Talk but for how long?

Enjoy.

 

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Redshirt

Huh, the injury prone draft pick got hurt? Who would’ve seen that coming?!

Unsurprised

Their GM?

Redshirt

Bless you, BLEERGH

Gumbygirl

Wacky!

ArmedandHammered

Looked better than a lot of the recent movies.

Unsurprised

Indeed

Screenshot 2024-10-06 at 12.04.17 PM.jpg
Unsurprised

I saw a Cardinals-Saints game in the Sun Bowl in October and it was 105°. I got sunburned, and I’m brownish.

Unsurprised

Fuck the Cards. Fuck the Bidwills.

King Hippo

Have we hit Maximum #ThePauls?

Last edited 1 month ago by King Hippo
Unsurprised

No. DeShaun is still walking.

King Hippo

But not all that well!

Don T

Fox Technology Center yeah!

Unsurprised

I won’t lie. For a microsecond I was hoping for a Sum of All Fears situation.

Unsurprised

Thank Christ he was drafted after Snyder left. He’d be fucking dead by now.

Unsurprised

Considering how much Snyder made from selling the team, I’m confident that karma is still a myth, at best.

ArmedandHammered

Well, without Snyder around, there was no one to give off those negative ways, man.

ArmedandHammered

waves, not ways, arrrrghhhhh

Redshirt

Interesting strategy not to cover Chase.

ArmedandHammered

Burrow burns Baltimore deep.

fleshwound_NPG

keep forgetting the bears STILL have another draft pick coming from the panthers (2nd)

ArmedandHammered

hahahahahahahahahahahahaahahahahahahhahah, deep breath, hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

Don T

Tough first QRT for Scott Hanson today. I suspect they switched to decaf at RZ Hq.

Gatoraids

hes suffering withdrawal shakes with the first bye week and first morning game

Redshirt

Okay, who covered LAMAR! with lube?

ArmedandHammered

Was there a Diddy party last night?

Mr. Ayo

Stop making up names on the spot.

Don T

I thought we agreed: no Parkinsons jokes.

ArmedandHammered

Banannacakes at Indy.

ArmedandHammered

Yeah, he finished all over a flattened Flacco.

Senor Weaselo

Am I mad for starting Geno over Caleb? Maybe, but I’d be madder if I started Rodgers!

ArmedandHammered

I started Touch of Downs instead of Stroud. I thought Darnold would do better against the Jets.

King Hippo

Not looking great for Black Panthers March on Chi****

Mr. Ayo

SAFETY DANCE!

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Gatoraids

Huuuuuuuuuuntleeeey

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Col. Duke LaCross

Gervon Dexter is a goddamn rampaging beast!

ArmedandHammered

I think that Panthers ball carrier is dead. Or at least concussed.

ArmedandHammered

The way he dropped the ball when hit, I swear he was unconscious before he hit the ground.

Redshirt

You’ll never believe this, but Joe Burrow was just sacked again.

Unsurprised

I miss making gif macros.

Unsurprised

GOODSon

King Hippo

Austin Seibert REVENGE Game!

Unsurprised

Why do they keep showing the Fins on RedZone? Is it their Make-A-Wish day?

Gatoraids

pick 6s still count

Col. Duke LaCross

Lot of good parabolic mic swearing in this Bears v Panthers game.

Don T

TARGET
Update:
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Unsurprised

Damn. Agalor had a worse landing than if he was on a Boeing.

BugEyedBoo

That CBS prime time lineup is something, alright.

King Hippo

Stroud is one cooooolllll motherfucker!

Doktor Zymm

You talking bout Stroud!

King Hippo

and Hippo can DIG it!

Unsurprised

That was pretty

yeah right

Holy fucking shit.

SKOL?

King Hippo

After Q1, y’all played as bad as humanly possible. But still won. Sign of a potentially great team? MAYBE

Mr. Ayo

CLANG!

ThePirateSloth

In the last 2 weeks, my 10mo old idiot puppy, has broken a toe on a front paw and now has an 1″ long tear in the webbing between two toes on a back paw.

5 brain cells just rattling around up there like an empty spray paint can. No impulse control, no self preservation. Just pure chaos.

Gatoraids

knew it had to be another injury for the fins to make Red Zone

litre_cola

As predicted earlier, Mrs. Cola is taking it to me in FF. I asked if I could put on leather and she said this beating was enough. Booooo

blaxabbath

litre_cola (artists conception)

https://imgur.com/l1KFQv0

Last edited 1 month ago by blaxabbath
Game Time Decision

Just remember to ICE UP SON, after

Unsurprised

What the fuck happened to Balmur?

Don T

He went with Aegron to the hills of Westmuth to seek the FUCJINF THROW IT TO MARK SNDREWS GIDAMMIT

litre_cola

RIGHT!?!?!?!?!?!?!?

Unsurprised

Wow. What a pass by Daniels. Commies!

Unsurprised

Okay. This one was not that good

Col. Duke LaCross

Chicago? Offense? WHAT IS THIS DEMONRY?!

Doktor Zymm

So I knew pointing was rude, but I didn’t know it was too violent for the NFL

Horatio Cornblower

Welp, looks like the 14-year-old Old English Sheepdog my mother adopted, (and I financed), after a friend of ours passed away three years ago has reached the end of her path. Making plans to juggle jury selection and “putting a dog down” this week, which should make for an interesting motion to continue.

2Pack

Always a difficult time. You’ve heard the bit about being with them as the pass right. That makes it all the more painful for you, but I understand it and will always do that.

2Pack

They… Damn do I hate auto correct.

Horatio Cornblower

Someone will be there. Definitely my Mom, me if I can get away from Court, my brother is on stand-by.

We don’t send dogs off alone.

Spur

Don’t pass the barrier. the soil is not good

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Don T

Make sure the judge and jury know of your compassion, integrity and AND being a dutiful son.

Spur

I have to wait all day to see my Cowpokes get their heads kicked in. Gonna be a long day.

Spur

Picks today
Ravens -2.5
Bills/Texans – over 47.5
Seattle – 6.5

Spur

Vikings terrorize elderly loon in the small village of London.

Gatoraids

watching some age of empires/age of mythology championships presented by redbull on top of a Spanish castle with the games today too

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I believe at the time the Vikings were active it was known as “Londonium”.

/or maybe not, I just finished a King Arthur novel and want to sound smart

Doktor Zymm

That was the Roman name, predates the Vikings by quite a bit

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Yeah, this book (The Bright Sword) was very enjoyable but the author said he didn’t lose sleep over hewing too tightly to the facts (which is perfectly fair, given that it’s full of faeries and magic and all kinds of stuff).

Doktor Zymm

Totally cool with that when people own it, good on him

King Hippo

6 minutes to revel in Heroic RedZone Muzak