That thing that everybody saw happening has now happened. The American landscape is such that bald-faced lies are not only acceptable but almost expected so of course it was called ‘a football decision’. So now he goes home at night and stoically sits on his moneypile and ruminates about what’s ahead-he’ll be a backup somewhere, maybe a spot starter in a year or two once the Giants stink washes off. His career record was 24-44-1 as a Giant and he was by no means responsible for all those losses but his inability to finish out games allowed him to contribute his fair share. He started off ok-he threw 34% of all his TD passes in his first year.
And now the fans have what they want-change. It comes in the form of Tommy Cutlets, who won three games last year and pushed his team out of QB contention in this year’s draft. Can he do it again? He probably will because if anything, he’s going to energize the team in the short term. So stay tuned for that unflexable Thanksgiving tilt with Cutlets and Rush as the stars. You know what you did.
Fallout:
-Incel-Adjacent Behavior?: The Bears lost in the most Bears fashion but are not letting it be. They’ll be sending tape of their losing blocked field goal to the head office and that sure as hell is going to show someone! [I hear the sounds of thousands of tiny fists shaking]
-The Jags Pederson-holding on dearly to what some people would call a “job”-has said that the team’s problems ‘start with me’. No comment. He also said that ‘everything’s on the table’, except his balls-they’re in a vice.
-I said it elsewhere but that Indy win over the Jets was unexpected and also sweeter than Shirley Temple singing “Good Ship Lollipop”.
To The Game!
Texans/Cowboys:
-It’s Cooper Rush O’Clock! Last we saw this fella was back in ’22 when as a fill-in he guided the team to a 4-1 record. Things are a touch different these days. The team is following it’s owner into a very obvious and loud-mouthed decline and the fact that the term “Curtains” is being thrown into the mix makes me smile for days.
-After the anticipated quick takeoff Houston has leveled of, losing 3 of their last 4 to sit at 6-4. They’re still sitting somewhat pretty in their division.
-Not that it matters but Dallas is 5 games back and fading.
-Stroud during weeks 7-10 has the worst passer rating of any QB with 100+ passes. Everybody watches film, ya gotta adjust to the adjustments.
-He has some relief in the form of Nico finally being back from a hammy. His completion percentage rises 12 points when Collins is on the field.
-He’ll need some more help from Danielle Hunter who leads every defender with 62 pressures. The next closest guy is 10 pressures behind.
Enjoy.
Jim Gaffigan making Belichick look like Jolly Saint Nick
Two calls in, and people are already too amped for this time of night on Monday in the middle of November.
Take a breath or seven, everyone.
I’m not currently responsible for ANY emergencies in your area, so I’m doing my part!
A few days into my tolerance break and my life has becoming Episode XII: Return of the Migraines
Doink! So nice to see you!
🎵 Hello Doinkness my old friend… 🎵
The festival of SHAN’KHLOR continues!
PALO!
Another thing, besides fumbles and sacks, that would make a Dallas QB not trust his protection would be watching game film.
Hey are we sharing Bluesky posts? Because this one is right up DFO’s alley:
https://bsky.app/profile/jentaub.bsky.social/post/3lbbcsoesjc2o
I may join Bluesky and I have never joined Twitter.
I was never on Xitter nee Twitter, either. Gotta say I like Bluesky. Buncha freaks.
Bluesky is a breath of fresh air.
Are we talking Diddy-level, Epstein-level, or what?
What kind of sex parties are we talking?
Stupid timid fucks at the DOJ who were like “yeah, but what if he’s acquitted?”
SAME EXACT FUCKING THING THAT’S HAPPENING TODAY, YOU STUPID SHIT-FOR-BRAINS HAND-WRINGING COWARDS.
Merrick Garland is a complete waste of oxygen. The GOP could have let him on the Court and I doubt that milquetoast little fucker would have made a goddamn bit of difference.
That was why he was nominated
Chuck Schumer continues to run the Senate.
Fuck him even more.
Cooper Rush yelling “Yeeeeeaaaaahhhhhhh, here we go!!!” just seems so wrong.
Evening. Just finished some work that kept me awake for days. Got briefly into a pack a day. Man, cigs are the fucking BEST.
Quit last Saturday. Again 😅
https://youtu.be/NUFqhREiqm4?t=39
Uf. Duro.
This keeps my resolve:
1. Don’t buy cigs
2. Mooching cigs is 😖
3. Gotta push the first stroke to 2027
Did Fozz leave? Devito is startin for the Gints!
Just watched the Netflix doc about Connor Stalions and the Michigan sign-stealing scandal after not having paid attention to it for a single second in real time. My takeaways:
1) The NCAA is a massive, steaming, shitpile.
2) Barstool’s Dave Portnoy is the human equivalent dog shit on a stick being waved aggressively in the face of American sports.
3) Harbaugh is the new Pete Carroll
How were you able to watch it with all the lag?
Am currently being crushed by influenza. For all I know, the lags were there.
Those school kids are germ factories. By the time your immune system is able to ward the cooties off, it will be summer vacation.My advice is to teach summer school.
Portnoy could be one of the worst humans in America.
He would certainly be on my train to Bergen-Belsen. It’s pretty full, but I would squeeze him in.
Yeah but his time at the top is coming to an end. There’s no way he stays in the top 50 for the next four years.
He did one of his pizza things in Danielson, CT, which is easily within driving distance of me. I was pissed I missed him. With my car. Repeatedly.
THIS MNF GAME I CALL IT THE TYSON-PAUL FIGHT BECAUSE IT’S TAKING PLACE AT AT&T STADIUM BUT I CAN’T WATCH IT BECAUSE MY FUCKING STREAM KEEPS CUTTING OUT.
Production team having Eli’s back with running the clip almost instantly.
Free sheet metal at the Jerrahdome tonight!
OK, this is pretty hilarious
https://twitter.com/awfulannouncing/status/1858677215585554792
America put Trump back in power. They must suffer.
How about the Donks. I was wrong about Bo Nix and Sean Peyton. Keep it up Donks
And Cincinnati didn’t think that dude had any gas left in the tank?
People tend to perk up after not having to live in Ohio
In our defense, he wasn’t this good.
(grumbles; kicks rock down road) Stupid functional o-line. Stupid dysfunctional franchise. Stupid dysfunctional life.
I just realized that Peyton facing the camera looks like a Picasso
Plump period fo sho
That is pretty fucking accurate of brotherly love.
That or complete indifference.
Yes, the Venn diagram between people watching MNF and people interested in a Lion King prequel must truly be huge.
What a move off the line by Turpin. What’s that called, a drag?
Don’t say that in Texas!
Drag in Texas involves a truck and chains
Or weird looking cars that are loud and fast.
Hey let’s go halfsies on the 10k bounty.
Finally a Dallas TD. Throw a party Double J.
/revision/latest?cb=20140925132255
Goddamn Turpin is quick.
He was shot out of a cannon!
The good news for me is that Blax is not getting a whole lot of points from Dak Prescott in our FF tilt.
See you guys in Ligue 2 soon!
WTF!
Beatie is getting me unneeded points. Sorry A&H! But Yahoo still thinks you have a 1% chance. Silly Yahoo.
He’s giving Hippo hope in his matchup against me which, as we all know, is the worst thing you can give teh Hippo.
Well, that and more opiates.
I thought that was the BEST thing?
I was thinking cheese.
A bowl of Chem de la Chem and me no care. Actually, Congrats!
I needed to catch up to los otros with points, I had some very low scoring games.
That might be the fastest VAR reversal ever. That wasn’t even close to a TD.
Now, the next play I’m quite sure will be a TD.
And there it is
So it is written, so it shall be.
Maybe they should switch each other’s defenses for offenses. That way we’ll avoid what is bound to be an embarrassing INTERKKAKE
I’m still at work, is Jerry World leaking shit like Redacted Stadium or did the scoreboard finally fall on somebody?
Looks like a chunk of one of the upper walls fell off. Apparently narrowly missed a bunch of people, Jerry Jones unfortunately not among them.
The average new homeowner age is 53, up from 46 a few years ago. They’re corny because they are middle-aged.
Good to know the next two or three generations get to keep picking up the pieces from 1914 still.
I bought a house at 28. And I’m still in it.
My kids? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. No chance.
https://ih1.redbubble.net/image.1527288559.1519/pp,504×498-pad,600×600,f8f8f8.webp
https://www.nar.realtor/research-and-statistics/research-reports/highlights-from-the-profile-of-home-buyers-and-sellers
Realtors are a cartel, but interesting report
Just 3 more Cowboys primetime games left.
Is that counting the Thanksgiving game?
yes
Pooper Rush vs Tommy the Tank Engine
https://imgur.com/rxrzQGL
Dallas Defense did a good.
and their O did a bad.
Looks like Jerrah micro-managed his construction managers as effectively as he micro-manages his football team managers…
I actually don’t mind that fake punt, even if it failed. Season’s over, what the hell; throw everything at the wall and see what sticks.
If enough of it sticks, maybe it will block the Sun from shining through the stadium.
Who knows? You might accidentally find the next Danny While.
Ha, Jerrah’s Shithole is falling apart. Good.
He’s the next Dan Snyder
Here and Now Dan Snyder
He was here before Snyder, and after. In the grim, dark present, there is only Jerrah.
There’s a comforting thought: 10,000 years of Jerry Fucking Jones connected to god knows what kind of life support systems and just constantly fucking over the team and the fans.
So Al Davis?
I’m perfectly content to see thousands of Cowboys and/or Raiders fans sacrificed daily to power the God-Emperor
JJ is Daedalus to Danny’s Icarus. Danny flew too close to the Sun of Corruption and plummeted out of the League while JJ flies just close enough
A donnybrook has broken out!
Jerry World falling apart? Yeah, that checks out
So, when does Dallas take the field for tonight’s game?
Next Christmas.
We all know that Dallas can’t play football after that
/choke in the playoffs
Touché
Dear Jesus I need Nico Collins to get hit by a truck.
Man, owing people means a ton. I was depressed as a motherfucker this morning but my teammate was coming in on her day off to work on a project and so I oozed my ass to the desk and it shook away completely until I had time to myself to be miserable. So …
How long and wide was the ooze trail?
Fatass-sized
Evening Folks.
Yo.
Hiiiiiiiiii
Tits. Is there no problem they can’t solve?
Restraining orders
I can’t believe I’m anticipating listening to Peyton Goddamn Fucking Manning.
Then again, I’d rather listen to the death rattle of my only child than to Troy and Joe.
I would pay good money for an uncensored audio stream of Rex and Rob Ryan watching the game while killing a bottle of Jim Beam and talking shit about everyone.
Oh, fuck yeah.
If that stupid fucking caricature of Italian Americans -Sean Stellato – is anywhere in the spotlight, I’m going hunting. Also, who fucking names an Italian kid “Sean”? That’s a fucking Irish name.
I think his family may be a bit stupid.
New York and New Jersey Italians are the Uncle Toms of our culture. Fuck them.
It’sa making me so mad, I’ma spill my pasta FAZOOL all over my wifebeater-a
WHY DID YOU SPILL YOUR FUCKING FOOD? YOU KNOW YOUR MOTHER HAS BEEN COOKING ALL GODDAMN DAY? YOU SEE HER CRYING? YOU’RE BREAKING HER FUCKING HEART!
Yup. We all know that when we’re naming our son, we’ve got two options…
“What he say fuck me for?” – Lowratio