Your Sunday Night NFL Football Open Thread

This is a great game…last year. Eh, maybe San Fran will rise to the occasion.

To The Game!

Niners/Bills:

-Who’da thunk that the Niners would sink to the bowels of the NFC West? (though it’s a very short climb to the top, no matter what AC/DC thinks in the form of song)

-I’ve said it before but they really stand out as a team that continually suffers key injuries to their stars on an ongoing basis.

-This is another one of those matchups that just doesn’t occur very often-they’ve met just thirteen times. Is this because the respective teams haven’t been good at the same time?

-Consistency, thy name is Buffalo: In their last four games the Bills have scored 31, 30, 30 and 30 points. The offense is only ranked 13th overall but they’re extremely efficient as they’re ranked third in scoring.

-Amari Cooper has been a bit of a disappointment so far though a wrist injury has slowed him. Brought in as a difference-maker to a wr corps that desperately needed one, he has but 7 grabs for 124 yards to this point.

-Another player expected to make a difference-McCaffrey-might find it tough going against a run D that held the Chiefs to just 78 yards on the ground.

-Reinforcing this notion is the fact that Bills linebacker Matt Milano, the lynchpin and signal-caller of the defense is finally activated after tearing his bicep (ouch!) in camp.

There you go.

 

 

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Unsurprised

I don’t expect the Bills to pull a 2016 SB Falcons boner, but … It’s the Bills.

blaxabbath

Happy Holiday to the SNF [W-2] Truckers!

Redshirt

This game has gone PLAID SCARF!

ArmedandHammered
Doktor Zymm

This game is great, LET’S BUILD A SNOWDOWN!

ballsofsteelandfury

Hook and Lateral to yourself!

WCS

Does Josh Allen get credit for a touchdown pass and a reception?

ballsofsteelandfury

Lemme check my FF stats!

ballsofsteelandfury

He’s got 2 passing TDs and one Receiving TD.

ballsofsteelandfury

So, yes!

Doktor Zymm

Only seems fair

Redshirt

Looks like he gets credit for a touchdown pass, touchdown reception but not reception itself.

Horatio Cornblower

That’s a great and fun play there, but how did they not rule Cooper’s forward progress stopped?

Doktor Zymm

No whistle?

ballsofsteelandfury

That’s no longer a thing

blaxabbath

Cris: “This is just straight line football. Nothing fancy.”

Also Cris: “I think a jet sweep would bring some good misdirection to the edge.”

Last edited 9 hours ago by blaxabbath
Doktor Zymm

Slippy sliding sledding!

Horatio Cornblower

21-3.

One more touchdown for Buffalo and Kyle Shananhan has them right where he wants them.

blaxabbath

Oh they’re playing in the snow! Woo!

Redshirt

That explains this weekend.

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Mr. Ayo

Wow, Maria Taylor in thigh highs.

Good thing she’s married so I’m not tempted in any way.

Doktor Zymm

Another fun solution for “kIcKiNg FiElDgOalS iS TOO eASY”
Snow and wind machines in all the domes!

Redshirt

Keep all kicking footballs and kickers in a freezer.

WCS

God is allowed one random lightning bolt strike per half while the ball is in the air.

Mr. Ayo

Brocky, DUCK!

Horatio Cornblower

Seems kind of mean to send a kicker out to try from 50+ twice in this game.

Doktor Zymm

And in a stadium that is CURSED with EXTRA CURSE ON TOP for kickers

Redshirt

In a season that has deicided Justin Tucker for BLEERGH’s sake!

Redshirt

Permission to join the Bills Mafia or should I give in to my poison pillness and root for the Chiefs?

Mr. Ayo
WCS

What’s wrong with the Fuck Loins?

Redshirt

Bengals and Bills fan bases have a weird relationship with the heartbreaks, Andy Dalton breaking the Bills playoff drought and the Damar Hamlin thing.

I’m fine with the Lions, though.

Unsurprised

“Don’t go fuckin’ up our lives, too” — Lions fans, inexplicably

WCS

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Unsurprised

That’s the line I was thinking of.

Game Time Decision

Don’t do it
Buffalo will give you hope and then rip it away. It may not be today or tomorrow but it’s coming

Redshirt

Ah, so it’s Cincinnati with snow and the weird neighbors are north of the river instead of south.

ballsofsteelandfury

Isn’t that Detroit?

Unsurprised

Technically, Windsor is to the south.

ballsofsteelandfury

My point exactly

Unsurprised

I’m picking up what you’re putting down.

jjfozz

Plan.

Fly to Buffalo.

Grab a huge mound of snow.

Shove it down Cris’s throat until he dies.

Game Time Decision

Fozz was in the clubhouse the whole time

jjfozz

My man crush on Matthew McConaughey knows no bounds.

Game Time Decision

All right
All right
All right

ThePirateSloth

I had a ginormous headache this morning, so I slept all day. Now that I’m watching the Seahawks game, I’m halfway into the 2ndQ and how in fuck did the Jets fuck this game up? They were in complete control until that Leonard Williams INT fat guy touchdown. And they STILL looked like they were gonna run away with the game.

WCS

“…did the Jets fuck this game up?”

Think you answered your own question.

jjfozz

“i’m going to pick up oldest Fozz.”
“No you’re not.”
“Why?”
“Why? You’ve been drinking all day. I wouldn’t let you walk the dog right now.”

Mr. Ayo

Poor puppy.

Horatio Cornblower

If I was given the ability to either eliminate disease from the world or beat Jimmy Fallon to death with a shovel well, I’m sorry I dented your shovel.

jjfozz

The epitome of smarm. How does an untalented fuck like him become succesful? I’ll buy you another snow shovel, if I can join in.

Horatio Cornblower

Please, join right in.

WCS

I’ll take the 9-1-1 call.

Oh, damn… bad reception… can’t get a fix…

Doktor Zymm

I would love to be at this game, but wow are a lot of people gonna feel like crap tomorrow morning

Spur

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Horatio Cornblower

BOING! BOING! BOING! BOING!

Redshirt

🎶 Dashing through the snow… 🎶

Redshirt

At this rate, SHAN’KLOR is gonna be more popular than Santa, Krampus and Hanukkah Harry combined!

jjfozz

Kicked out of the Ravens subreddit for posting about the fact I’m fed up with the Ravens. Reddit is a cesspool, and every mod should be made to drink a bubbling pint of diarrhea and pus.

Doktor Zymm

no matter what team we support, we can all agree on this

jjfozz

It’s crazy. My post wasn’t angry or negative. Just saying what i wanted to say. That site has been a toilet bowl for hte past several years.

Horatio Cornblower

That’ll get you invited back!

/I’m not kidding; Reddit loves that kind of talk.

Brick Meathook

And here I am just trying to find a ride from BWI to DC on the night of Dec 4th.

First world problems.

SonOfSpam

And now McCaffrey’s ded

Horatio Cornblower

But on the plus side, now Jordan Mason can save* my FF season!

*HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

fleshwound_NPG

BLEERGH dont take no snow days

SonOfSpam

Aw the penalty took away an INT for Damart Attack Hamlin

Redshirt

Aw, that’s gonna break his heart. Again.

Redshirt

AI is smarter than Ohio State.

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Spur

Not a real image, he’d have beard dye in that box. In fact I think its written in his contract a few years supply.

jjfozz

The first cold weather game I played in showed me that there was another level to pain.

yeah right

The snow games were always a blast but we never made it past 30 minutes or so because somebody got broke real hard.

I remember two torn knee ligaments for sure and neither one mine!

Spur

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King Hippo

Ike Yiadom is still in the League? Jesus, the Tomsulas really DO have an injury crisis.

fleshwound_NPG

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Redshirt

Either Allen hurt his wrist or he really needs to pee

Redshirt

Odd time for the defender to try to start a conga line during the pass route.

WCS

I’ll be back in a bit to hold things down till dawn.

I just wanted to remind everyone that Mike Tomlin still has never had a losing season.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IZBlqcbpmxY

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AHl_DaeMDpI

Mr. Ayo
BugEyedBoo

I think my brother was just trolling me yesterday when he was trying to get me to believe that 2024 Aaron Rodgers is better than 2024 Russell Wilson, and that the Steelers should try to get Rodgers for next year. At least I hope he was trolling because otherwise he’s amazingly dumb.

blaxabbath

Rodgers has basically taken two years off. He’s ready to *pop*!

King Hippo

I loved his Cat Burglar look today, too.

Mr. Ayo

We do not need the yard and line marker overlays you fucking asshats.

Doktor Zymm

You don’t like the Predator effect on the white parts of the unis?

Mr. Ayo

I don’t want there to be any doubt, so no, I do not like that.

jjfozz

There is a car dealership in Maryland that should thank its lucky stars that it’s not burning to the ground right now.

Three hours wasted with a bunch of fuckfaces.

They can eat my balls.

Gatoraids

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jjfozz

A classic 80s flick. Squiggy from Laverne and Shirley, plus Kurt Russel, and boobs.

Brick Meathook

GREATEST MOVIE EVER

“That’s too fuckin’ high!”

Doktor Zymm

Shoulda gone down to Eastern Motors
https://youtu.be/g6CslpftOe4

Last edited 10 hours ago by Doktor Zymm
Spur

White Field! Bosa still made the trip and is loving this.

ThePirateSloth

Pupdate:
Me: Come here Evelyn, play time!
Evelyn: *brings toy, jumps on/at me, lands with full weight on one paw directly into crotch*
Me: Ok, play time is now over!

jjfozz

Much like toddlers, dogs have an innate sense of how to step on a person’s balls.

Doktor Zymm

LAKE EFFECT!

Game Time Decision

Lake effect snow is the worstest snow

fleshwound_NPG
Mr. Ayo

SHUT THE FUCK UP CRIS!

Last edited 11 hours ago by Mr. Ayo
Spur

Some snowballs can cure his loose lips.

Unsurprised

Dungy hanging out there alone

Spur

Breakfast for dinner. Its the best on a cold night.

The Maestro

Oh man. We had dinner for breakfast today. Something I call “Italian ramen”… fettuccine with a pesto cream sauce, some parm-crusted chicken, and two poached eggs on top. What a dynamite way to start a day. It’s been 12 hours and I’m still thinking about it.

Redshirt

Say a team is cursed without saying a team is cursed.

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Mr. Ayo

JFC. But also, LOL.

Doktor Zymm

They are working their way up the *deep echoing voice* RANKS OF THE CURSED

jjfozz

Fuck the Ravens
Fuck Harbaugh
Fuck Tucker (twice)
Fuck my love for football

I’m going outside to hammer a nail into my knee

Redshirt

Embrace the nadir.

Unsurprised

Wear gloves!

Doktor Zymm

But…the most important thing. HOW MUCH SNOW ARE WE GONNA SEE??

Redshirt

Looks like the snow is over and the field is cleared off.

Mr. Ayo

Climate Change Isn’t Real!

Suck it Libs!

Doktor Zymm

I’m willing to accept snow blown in by the wind as well as any leftover flurries

ArmedandHammered

It could start again. Mr. Redshirt is being mean because the Bengals are shittier than the a used colostomy bag storage room.

Mr. Ayo
Doktor Zymm

Poor Burrow is gonna end up in the HoF w/o a ring and a lot of scar tissue unless he gets one with a different team at the end of his career

Mr. Ayo

As the olds call it, he’s living the “Marino Career”

Redshirt

At this rate, he’s gonna pull a Palmer and force his way out.

blaxabbath

Sounds like he needs to learn how to burn the clock. Use the run game, JoE!1!!!!