TGIF! I’m on the verge of an afternoon vodka nap, so let’s get this done.

Word Count Filler Time

Hey, baseball is happening. Even though the Mariners have suddenly forgot. But, this allow me to use some filler on balls hit into the stands. I’ll skip the Alice Roth story that got hit by two (2) foul balls of the same batter, but it’s still quite funny.

Robert Cotter
This 11 year old fan changed baseball history. While attending a Phillies game in 1922 he caught a foul ball. At the time, teams were rather cheap so balls hit into the stands were expected to be returned. Cotter didn’t cotton too kindly to that idea and refused to return the ball. As a result he spent the night in jail. The next morning, a judge ordered him to be set free, because, common sense. Although he didn’t get that ball back, he was invited to a Yankees game and got an autographed ball from Babe Ruth. Soon afterwards, thanks to an increase in home runs, teams finally agree to just let the fans keep the baseballs hit into the stands.

Alex Popov
This was the dude that caught Barry Bonds 73rd home run ball at then Pac Bell Park in 2001, only for a huge melee to ensue and the ball end up getting knocked out of his glove. That ball fell to Patrick Hayashi, a college student. As you can imagine, this ball was worth a lot of money at the time and this being America, a law suit was filed for ownership. That trial was held 13 months later with the judge ultimately ruling they both had ownership, the ball should be sold, and they would split the proceeds. By that time, the market for the ball had cooled considerably and it went for a paltry $450k at auction. And for all his troubles, Popov was later sued by his attorney for $473k in unpaid attorney fees.

Jay Arsenault
We return to Pac Bell Park the following season in 2002. Bonds is about to hit his 600th homerun. Jay received a free ticket from three friends to the game and made an oral agreement that if Jay caught number 600 he would sell it and split it among the four friends. Well, of course, Jay caught it and then tried to hide from his former friends. They, of course, sued for breaching their oral contract. Jay decided it wasn’t worth the trouble, sold the ball, and split the proceeds as originally agreed. The ball only fetched 600k, but still a good return for everyone for a ticket.

That’s enough ball talk here. No doubt, there will be more below.

Click here to get to commenting

Sexy Time

Enjoy the weekend, folks! Alright, now let’s get to the comments!

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WCS

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6zD1LM8E-y8

Regardless of whether the dad is/was involved in any way, I want to point out that it wasn’t a drag queen or group of gay guys doing this. It was the son of the guy in the TRUMP shirt. Again.

Projection is so very real.

Gatoraids

dead disco, dead funk, dead rock n roll

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cEsr5Mm3JfE

BrettFavresColonoscopy

I was just thinking how great it would be if Ted Cruz got a Google alert he was mentioned and came to DFO and saw our banner. It warmed my frigid heart a little bit.

Doktor Zymm

About to buy a dash cam and Honduras bumper sticker. Gonna put my middle aged white lady Karen powers to work

Doktor Zymm
WCS

Song’s all over the place, and I love it.

Doktor Zymm

If you merged the Bengals offense with the Browns defense you would actually have a pretty good team

Gatoraids

I like it twice as many to “honor”

–Mike Brown

Bogdanski

https://youtu.be/FnL6M8kCQ18?si=DD-REfofGOww0TE1
Such a good request line today. Sorry it’s late but I can’t pass up a chance to introduce more people to Tilt

Bogdanski

https://youtu.be/zLCRAalHhPc?si=dFFhXWVzEEZZhsfw
And this will never not be good, even if you don’t like Clueless

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Thanks! I was pretty psyched about the topic when I thought of it and everyone really stepped up and did a great job with requests. I hope everyone understood that any nitpicking was just to emphasize how tricky to topic was.

Bogdanski

You win the award for the most new-to-me bands i will checking out in the days to come

Gatoraids

Yoko Kanno did the best anime sound track lot of good ones, Rains female version is my favorite of the two

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1G1ABxk3CfY

Gatoraids

and a bit later Green Bird

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9POYDoHXUX0

yeah right

Honey?

“I brought the groceries!”

Hola everyone.

Long week but a good week.

Three years and 2 months to the day.

Who’s counting?

WCS

What’re we (or really, you) counting?

yeah right

My retirement and future home.

WCS

Yeah, that’s a good answer alright.

Redshirt

…I guess I should see how the Reds did. Extra Innings? Isn’t nine innings of trauma enough for one fanbase?

Redshirt

Yup, that’s my Reds, playing down to the competition.

If the Reds and Bengals ever meet in a charity ballgame, their respective ineptitudes would surely result in a black hole large enough to engulf the planet Earth and likely most of the inner planets of the Solar System.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

What would be a fair game for a baseball team to play against a football team? Not basketball; the football team’s size would be too big of an advantage. Maybe lacrosse?

Redshirt

Patrick Mahomes played tonight? Didn’t they learn anything from Joe Burrow nearly getting IR’d on Monday in Week -2?!

WCS

But… wouldn’t that be a good thing for everyone (Chiefs fans need not apply)?

Speaking of, besides Otto, who are the other Chiefsoholics here?

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Um…what’s his name…you know, mumbly Joe…?

TheRevanchist!

Gatoraids

cardiologists?

WCS

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You’re thinking of Bears fans.

Jimbo

Defense attorneys?

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

From a financial perspective it probably is.

2Pack

Enough of this talk about balls. Lady number 7 and I are going to need to hit the gym after all those sweets. Thanks Ayo, your hustle here is always appreciated.

FB_IMG_1755757485358
ArmedandHammered

I loved the 80s. Not as much as the 70’s but still they were great.

WCS

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Brick Meathook
Brick Meathook

DOUBLE DOINK!

WCS

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Gumbygirl

.

1000007660
ArmedandHammered

Watching the Titans/Vikings and they have a player named Wylie, which always makes me think of this:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v5iI7sD492A

Redshirt

.

IMG_1157
WCS

Glitch in The Matrix, and you cannot convince me otherwise.

ArmedandHammered

So if they are the most identical twins, then would them having sex be incest or masturbation?

ArmedandHammered

Who needs testosterone supplements, just watch this video!

WCS
Horatio Cornblower

The Red Sox have a player named Johystnixon.

Thought that bore mentioning.

Bogdanski

Nicknamed “The Password”

Brick Meathook

Atomic selfie:

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Horatio Cornblower

Put the draft on auto-pick, since I don’t recognize any other names.

Red Sox with an insurmountable 1-0 lead in the 7th. Judge about the lead-off and do nothing, which is pretty much what he’s done the last 10 weeks. Mike Trout MVP Ass.

Last edited 8 months ago by Horatio Cornblower
Horatio Cornblower

Oooh, a deep fly ball to…2B.

Entire team is softer than babyshit.

Horatio Cornblower

Yeah, I think the question about Boone was out to bed for good and for all when the Yankees had a 1-0 lead in the 9th inning of Game 1 of the World Series and Boone said “Nestor Cortes!” and then FUCKING FOLLOWED THROUGH WITH IT!!!

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly
Horatio Cornblower

How he wasn’t fired before getting back to the visitor’s clubhouse is beyond me.

Dumbest decision I’ve ever seen, and Anthony Volpe plays SS for my team.

WCS

Magic Johnson moonlighting as an usher 0:02

WCS

Oh. Because it is him.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Yeah, it looks like they were sitting right behind Dodgers ownership.

Horatio Cornblower

Just got Najee Harris with he 173rd pick.

If his eye rebounds from that fireworks incident this would be a great pick!

Gumbygirl

Justin Jefferson is sporting more diamonds than a dowager duchess at the opera.

ballsofsteelandfury

Horatio drafting Cowboys makes me think he wants to get relegated from the Lowratio League…

Last edited 8 months ago by ballsofsteelandfury
Horatio Cornblower

Well, Pickens was an accident. Dak is great for FF, because he accumulates a lot of points, and Dallas will be trailing a lot this year so he’ll be throwing often. I did take Aubrey, their kicker, because he’s the best kicker from last year and, from experience, I know that Dallas can’t get in the end zone with any degree of frequency, so he should get a lot of FGA.

ArmedandHammered

Damn that was a hard hit by Dallas,

Gatoraids

the death of JR?

ballsofsteelandfury

I didn’t know Dallas got an AFLW team!

Horatio Cornblower

-Jackie Kennedy, 1962

Horatio Cornblower

Someone took a Dallas RB.

You fool. You utter fool.

Gumbygirl

Oh fuck, hope it wasn’t me!

Horatio Cornblower

Kyle Pitts in the 8th. Remember when he was supposed to rewrite the TE positions?

Narrator’s Voice: He did not rewrite the TE position.

Horatio Cornblower

DAK! DAK! DAK! in the 7th!

That’s good depth-buildin’!!

Horatio Cornblower

Took the Philly D with the 6th pick, theorizing that 4 games against Dallas and NY can’t do anything but up the ol’ point total.

Horatio Cornblower

Took a flyer on George Pickens in the 4th, got Mahomes in the 5th.

I only took Pickens because I couldn’t find Burrows and thought someone had taken him. They had not. Alas and alack.

ArmedandHammered

What so instead of pretty as a picture, it is now as pretty as an instagram? Being able to retire and become an actual hermit can not come fast enough.

Horatio Cornblower

My son told me he went to a county fair and told the people at the Pro-Life tent, who had photos of the fetus at various stages, that he’d kill it at every single stage.

I think he’s kidding.

ArmedandHammered

It isn’t even really human till the end of the cooking process anyway, have a tail and gills and some point as they evolve to human during gestation.

Horatio Cornblower

I support a woman’s right to an abortion up to the 400th week and no, that wasn’t a typo.

ArmedandHammered

I pretended to call the fire department one time to ask (in front of me beloved misbehaving children) what the age cut off was for surrendering your children at a fire station. Then said “Great, so I can drop both of them off!” They behaved for a few days after that.

Gumbygirl

That’s good daddin’!

ArmedandHammered

Gumbygirl, I found a strain called Watermelon Mojito and it is fantastic, the watermelon is subtle but there, like a watered down jolly rancher.

Gumbygirl

Oooh, I like the fruity ones!

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly
Horatio Cornblower

Kyren Williams and Chuba Hubbard back-to-back.

I like it. Headed for the Yahoo D+

scotchnaut

Me: “The Giants could finish 3rd in the division this year.”

Everyone Else: “Are you fucking kidding me? How could that possibly happen?”

Jerry Jones: “I DON’T EVEN KNOW THE NAME OF MICAH PARSON’S AGENT! YEEEEEE HAWWWWWWW! I’M THE BEST DAMN NEEGOSHEATETOR YOU EVER SAW!

Everyone Else: “Ah, I get it now.”

Horatio Cornblower

-sigh-

Yeah.

scotchnaut

“Would a medium Pepsi salve those wounds?”

-John Mara

ArmedandHammered

Fact that it was a Pepsi would make it worse.

Horatio Cornblower

Doing a practice draft for the Lowratio League.

Just took CeeDee 5th overall. Passed on McCaffrey. Too many leg/knee injuries of late.

ballsofsteelandfury

That’s a fabulous top three!

ArmedandHammered

Which games are people watching tonight?

ballsofsteelandfury

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ArmedandHammered

This Dallas game has been as exciting as Mormon porn. Thinking about going back to finish Sorority Girls and the Slime Bowl-a-rama, definitely be more interesting than this.

ArmedandHammered

I wonder if there is a slasher cannibal version called The Hangry Games.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Ran it by my mother-in-law and she said she’s already seen it and it’d only be worth her time to watch again if she was immortal.

Jimbo

Cowboys/Falcons

ArmedandHammered

Trying to watch it as well.

Gumbygirl

Switching between that one and Vikes/Tits.

ballsofsteelandfury

Vikings-Tits?

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ArmedandHammered

She can en-thrall me.

Doktor Zymm

Civ 7

Horatio Cornblower

Watching the Yankee-Red Sox game and there’s a squirrel on the field. it’s frantic to get out, but of course there’s people all over the place. It’s running all over and back and forth and you’re starting to feel bad for it and it just found a peanut in foul territory and fuck everything, he’s gonna sit there and eat that peanut.

I wonder if he can close?

ArmedandHammered

Seems to have better concentration than the Yanks closers, that’s for sure.

Gumbygirl

I tossed a handful of blueberries to the local squirrel yesterday. A huge crow flew down trying to menace him, and squirrel was like “fuck off, bro.” Stood his ground like a badass, I went and got him more berries!

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

“110! Wait, no, 1000! Ah, I can’t decide!” – DJ 3000

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