Let’s hope that Bama/Noles tilt was nap-friendly, cause BOY HOWDY does the evening slate tilt late af.
Coastal Carolina (+11.5) at Wahoowa (6:00, ACCN)
Fun Moneyline upset pick #2. Because why not? Chanticleers is the best nickname in sportsball, and it ain’t even close.
LSU (+4.5) at Clemson (7:30, ABC)
The Humbling of Brian Kelly, episode 4,582. Or he finally breaks through and does something. Other than kill a student manager, that is.
California (+1.5) at Oregon State (10:30, ESPN)
Jaysus, we better hope the Death Valley Showdown stays close. Niiiiiiiiiiiiiiicccccccccccccce Beaver to rise above the Golden Shower Bears. Ah feel so dirty…
Team Secular Big Love (-5.5) at Westwood Klavern (11:00, Fox)
Not a typo, national Fox game kicking off at 11 EST. Will the vast coaching disparity matter MOAR in a Week 1 context? Vegas sure thinks so.
Colorado State (+21.5) at Washington (11:00, BTN)
Classic Late Night with the Big Ten Network matchup. Who knows, some years JV RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRAM IT!! can be frisky.
I am at a high school reunion where I didn’t attend but people SWEAR we used to get high out back.
I am rolling with it because it keeps the drink tickets coming.
Are you sure you didn’t go there?
We got high in the bathroom when I was in high school. The 70’s were a strange and wonderful land.
Secular with a VENGEANCE this year, it seems
Just found out The Cowboy Junkies are touring twice in CT next month and I am unreasonably excited about this.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kMFJiHq8OD4&list=RDkMFJiHq8OD4&start_radio=1
Margo Timmins is so fucking good.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AsYmHoetXms&list=RDkMFJiHq8OD4&index=2
Bell ringing looks kinda fun
I bet you could rig the bells to one of those deep state weather machines
Handbells or the giant cathedral bells you hang from a rope to ring?
the more capitalism and greed keeps trying to fuck up college football the more college football remains glorious and in some cases even more so, in spite
college football: destroy the pac-12? BAMA IS DEAD. super-conferences? I WILL PUT A MANNING IN TEXAS AND MAKE ALL THE HANK HILLS CRY. trump with an executive order for nil? I WILL PROVE TO DABO THAT GOD IS DEAD
It’s made me reach for a fourth beer, which is a rare occurrence these days.
Switched over to the UCLA-Utah game and the UU on the Utes helmets reminds me of my father’s opinion on the Unitarian Universalist Church, to which a couple of our former neighbors belonged: “The UUs are the kind of people who would burn a question mark onto your lawn.”
They seem like a nice enough bunch
Nope, the arson would be too violent an act and they would be damaging the environment! UU is where people who cannot fit into other religions gather together, it is like the island of misfit toys, except for religion.
Trust me, lived it for two years. Wonderfully nice people.
Nobody wants a Charlie In The Box!
LSU QB giving all glory to God has gotta be killing Dabo.
Alabama vs Clemson shaping up to be a great matchup in the Bad Boy Mowers Pinstripe Bowl
multiple top 5 teams fall AND bama
What a fucking terrible play with the game on the line.
Where’s your god now, Dabo?
https://bsky.app/profile/sickoscommittee.org/post/3lxo4ssohus2c
THAT’S fucking funny.
rip brian kelly
https://bsky.app/profile/jeradwalker.bsky.social/post/3lxo4bemfuk22
nope, rip dabo!
You just had to try for ONE FIRST DOWN you fat pussy
BAHAHAHAHAHA SUCK IT ZVEREV!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a0fkNdPiIL4
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VNwigGCOIxk
Sadly these don’t stop
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K_yBUfMGvzc
According to the OSHA training course I just completed these ladies are not wearing the proper personal protective equipment for the job.
Indeed
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Kq4OtRsdXls
After watching that, I know my next destination.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aYDfwUJzYQg
Is there a catalog for these products?
Sadly no.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=otCpCn0l4Wo&list=RDotCpCn0l4Wo&t=16s
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tgivYC2s6hs
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8Uee_mcxvrw
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hat1Hc9SNwE
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XiMrrleH_hI
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TAqZb52sgpU
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5ohy4jQnvMM
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2EaE0_gQLw0
Watching the Cubs Rockies game.
These are my problems!
There’s a sign behind home plate that says Colorado’s leanist bacon.
You’re doing bacon wrong, Colorado.
Maybe they’re talking about cops.
Dabo and Bama go down in the same day? That is tasty business.
Anything is possible with large sums of money and violent young men.
‘Will they do it 3 times in a row?”
Kirk, my brother in Christ, if the other team proves itself unwilling, unable, or both, to stop a play I assure you the other team will run that play 7,000 times in a row.
the lsu touchdown had 4 wideouts all bunched up together, and they threw to the 1 on 1 matchup on the other side
next redzone possession will see on one side 4 WR and a Ford F-150 lined up to one side, and guess what, the other side will have the 6’6″ guy lined up 1 on 1
guess where the ball goes
The Ford F-450 that leaked out of the backfield of course.
Cheering for Brian Kelly? Feels pretty gross. But one must. One. Must.
(motherfucker promptly ices own 4th down stop)
I can root for a meteor.
Kind of saving that for ND/Miami tomorrow…
I root for ND now that they have a colored fella as the head coach, because I suspect it’s killing 2/3 of the fan base.
JV Football funny:
College football coaches on fourth down have gone beyond Analytics. They have entered Madden Gamer Who Thinks Third-Down Stop Was Not Canon mode
🏈
Finally getting around to reading The Only Plane in The Sky: An Oral History of 9/11 by Garrett Graff
Checked it out from the Library 📚
I know how it ends.
Well, don’t spoil it.
Well he can’t here, since it’s Oral.
Boy, wait until I tell you how “Habsburgs On The Rio Grande” ends.
“Running Into A Crowded Box” is also what I said when I ran into my ex at an Echo Jane concert back in the late 80’s.
(this is a lot funnier when you know Echo Jane was the lesbian band in CT back then. I was there for main act, which for the life of me I can’t remember, but I think it had something to do with the sister of the lead singer for Belly)
(Jokes are funny when they rely on 35+-year-old references that have to be explained)
I also love a loaded box.
— Travis Henry
Q: What has four legs and eats pussy?
A: The Indigo Girls!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F5r-jUW_Yew
WVU put down Bobby Mo, Duke WCS and her highness had great days, Lil’ and Lil’er WCS spent the evening with their idiot dad at a friends’, and now it’s time to putter around the county.
How’s it goin’, n’at, folks?
Fair to middlin’
I’m quite envious of the royal life. Enjoy it.
Doing right proper.
Stepson went back to his apartment today, so Its just me and the wife again.
Pants off and Bourbon on. Life is good.
Uh oh. LSU QB may have a leg owie from a late hit.
if that hit was any later it would’ve come with a doritos locos tacos and a baja blast at 1am
If it makes Brian Kelly experience negativity, I’m in favor of it.
not even at NFL Week 1 and we already at “what is a catch”
Not even that. We’re at the level of “that was a catch but fuck them gumbos”
god will not stop sending brian kelly to hell while he lives, before he actually does it one day
LSU probably don’t even got no backup Mess-kins no MOAR THANKS OBAMA!!!!11111
Found a funny:
Standing outside the supermarket asking people if they want to trade groceries
I got a first place (defended last year’s win) for my harvest spice loaf at the big agricultural fair this weekend. Third place for my cornbread. Didn’t place for my challah bread. It was a shit braid and I knew it.
The animals were in top form and I got my Nova Scotia style donair at the best of the Greek food trucks. Somehow there were 5 of them. I’ve met maybe one Greek person in my entire life here.
It was 33 degrees (91 for the U.S. of Trump) and busy. Got some yuzu sake for litre. Not even a single shooting spree. Good fair day.
Congrats on the motherfucking bread!
I am down for the yuzu sake my brother!
Padres are stomping the Twins 12-3!!! ⚾️
Looks like they’re heading to the Playoffs this year!!!! 💯
That’s ROCKINGGGG!!!!
Random day in the life. Had a few beers and ordered some tacos. Forty minutes later get a picture that says “Flawless delivery!”
To my same address number one city block away.
Sent help to their Ai bullshit messenger saying, “That’s not my house, dude.”
They redelivered and I got some very tasty tacos.
Few minutes ago I get a call and they said “Is this yeah right? I have two bags of food with your name and phone number on them. What should I do?”
“Have some free porch tacos. They’re yours. And thanks for calling, that’s actually pretty cool.”
“No problem. Let me get these tacos somewhere.”
How safe are porch tacos?
Hope they weren’t sitting out there too long!
It was 2 hours between misdelivery and phone call.
81 Fahrenheit. Light wind from the west maybe 4 mph.
In San Pedro.
Very borderline, usda says 2 hours unrefrigerated between 40f and 90f. Down to 1 hour 90-140
/me, looking at the expiration date on the guacamole I just finished off.
Hoo boy, Zymm’s not gonna like this!
Expiration dates aren’t real, although botulism is
You’ll be fine, wash them down with a couple of cold cervezas.
*wakes up from vodka nap*
Fucking Mariners. You suck. Just miss the playoffs. I can’t believe I’m going to spend another month following this stupid team. FUCK
Your broken image link to a an unserious and unfunny comic cel is quite appropriate. As such, I’ve given you a well deserved plus one.
.
I’ll give you another plus one because the image works now. BEGRUDGINGLY.
Christ, what a terrible comic strip.
You’ll like this comic:
I”m suppressing a full post on my irrational outrage about this.
I think we all want to hear it.
Also, despite this being your one character flaw Brick, you’re still my 2nd favoUrite person here.
I won’t tell the others.
Do it, do it, do it, do it!!!
“in which Mary advises a friend to commit suicide”
You guys aren’t gonna believe this, but Devin Williams blew the lead for the Yankees.
No! Normally he is so consistent, wait that is the issue, he constantly sucks.
Next you’re gonna tell me the Reds are in a perpetual, error filled slump!
/sets up Powerpoint
How much time you got?
bama, today:
-1st season-opening loss since 2001
-largest opening loss since 1970
-87 rush yards, fewest in opener since 1975
-coach deboer’s 4th loss vs unranked teams in just 14 games at bama
contract status:
I definitely wouldn’t be looking to buy in the area if I were him.
Stick with the lease.
I drink that in like the finest bourbon
https://bsky.app/profile/hollyanderson.bsky.social/post/3lxnuwz7bf22z
In a touching moment after the Texas game, Eli gave his juice box and PB&J sandwich to Arch and then gave him a hug.
“I know what it’s like to have a bad day,” Eli said, “maybe we can go watch The Wiggles together.”
https://bsky.app/profile/sickoscommittee.org/post/3lxntg4zhpc22
PAAAAAAAAAAAAWWWWWWWWWWWLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL
Vance is the same coloUr as my week old moldy bread.
You guys ever seen Midnight Express? Holy shit on a popsicle was that one goddamn brutal movie. I’m never going to try and smuggle drugs out of Turkey again.
They were also a helluva tag team in WCW.
Two things i am horrible at: teaching people and taking care of sick people. I’m about to poison my wife right now, she has a head cold and you would have thought she lost both her legs.
oh man, BROTHER.
I was just lucky my first chikd needed next to no instruction (she was reading Harry Potter books at age 4), and then I could pay her to help her sisters with their homework later.
Also, I HATE (my least male stereotype trait) a fuss being made over me when I am sick. I assume others would logically prefer to be left alone like I would.
Much better for all that Hippo get divoreced…
I don’t have the patience to teach, I get frustrated and wind up saying, ‘WHAT THE FUCK DON’T YOU UNDERSTAND?
One of the parents on our team was chirping at a player nonstop today. Even better, she’s a white Karen, long blonde ponytail and the kid was black. God I fucking hate people. I was hoping to run her over in the parking lot, but didn’t see her.
I’m a chick, I can hit her for you without breaking any social norms
After the game, I walked over to my car because I was so goddamn angry and didn’t want the other parents to notice. It’s so pointless and outright fucking mean.
shame the trump rumors turned out not to be true, croaking on the same weekend as texas and bama losing and starting 0-1 was too much to ask
Eh, he’s definitely dying, but it’s probably going to take a lot longer than any of us would like.
kissinger went to 100, so ill believe it when i see it
Like I said, a lot longer than many of us would like.
Actually, I said “any”. But I meant “many”.
Trump’s not making 100. Unfortunately he’ll probably see 83.
Evil is the bestest preservative, it seems.
I’m sure Vance isn’t averse to helping him along
Attn: Dok
You might want to try the Mälort flavour…
https://secretchicago.com/van-leeuwen-ice-cream-wicker-park-chicago/
I’ll try it, but more because I really like Van Leeuwen Ice Cream than because the idea appeals at all. If I can have a sample and then get a scoop of a good flavor I think that would be ideal!
Oh damn, it’s in Wicker Park, annoying neighborhood I might get eaten by hipsters
Aren’t they all organic and vegan? Don’t wear anything that might make it ironic if they did eat you?
New projector setup is basically the full wall. See the electrical outlet for scale. I got some stick on blackout film for the patio door to make it perfect during the day
One can only truly enjoy father brown at 2x life size
Projector setup? That’s Rocking!
Gotta love the middle finger to the camera there!!
I called that one.
True, it was only my dog and I in the room at the time, but he’ll tell you I said “Tucker, he’a about to flip off the camera”
Bama loses and Texas loses. The rest of the SEC is laughing their asses off right now.
Can’t wait to see Brian Kelly’s face after losing tonight.
I assure you it is not just the SEC.
“As an FSU rep, I’d just like to say this isn’t the first time photographic evidence as led to someone coming up short against us.”
That’s a healthy pair of bolt-ons.
She’s since had them removed and expressed regret, but of course she did that after those implants got her a whole bunch of publicity and a whole bunch of money and a couple of very unsolicited dick pics.
LOVE this line:
No, of course not. Everyone knows it was actually her sparkling personality that got her photo shoots in Maxim and Playboy.
The Fightin’ Horatio’s squeaked by a valiant, but possibly overmatched, CCSU Blue Devil squad, 59-14.
National Title Game, here we come!!
(Didn’t see a play of the game, was busy stuffing my face with fried dough with sauce and cheese, loaded baked potato, and giant turkey leg. Also lemonade. I do not feel good right now)
I honestly did not know that CCSU had a football team. Have they always had one?
In recent years. I’m not sure they’re D-1.
I was at U Chicago for 3 years before I realized they had a football team. Still don’t know where they play, I swear there isn’t a football field anywhere on campus
Why Alabama Isn’t Out Of The National Title Race Despite Getting Tubthumped By An Unranked FSU: My Column…
“The Tide showed inspirational resolve and composure…”
Remember, this is an FSU team that couldn’t get into the national playoff despite going undefeated in a Power-5 conference, in order to make room for Alabama and/or Texas. And yet somehow this loss will be counted as a “quality” loss for Roll Damn Tide.
I’m absolutely not going to remember that.
https://www.oregonlive.com/ducks/2025/08/watch-the-duck-mascot-loses-its-head-before-oregons-season-opener.html?outputType=amp
Heads will roll
SUDDEN CHANGE!
BAMA is back! For a few minutes anyway.