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Your Monday Night Doubleheader Open Thread

scotchnaut

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, ,

I don’t mind this at all in theory. (will not be watching till the end of the second feature) And I’ve been told there are three more over the course of the season. Choice is good!

Fallout:

-Of course most of the salient reportage revolves around injuries to Burrow, McCarthy, Fields and Daniels. This will be the third of six seasons that Joe will only play 10 games or so. Another circumstance not given much attention is that two of the Panthers starting o-linemen are down. This might be a lost season right off the hop.

-Maybe the Packers D is all that? They tamed both the Lions and the Commies, causing Detroiters to fuss and fret and then low and behold they hung a 50 spot on the Bears.

-Not All That: There was a time not long ago that Trevor Lawrence strutted into the league and coaches, scouts and media alike designated him as “The Next One”. He now has 70 turnovers in 62 games played and progress sure seems stalled. I think this is the time/place to realize that he is what he is.

-Two Updates: The Chiefs are 0-2. The Colts haven’t punted yet.

To The Games!

Bucs/Texans:

-Baker has a streak of six straight games throwing 2+ TD’s.

-Nico was started everywhere but delivered 3 catches and 25 yards. The good news is that he’s back at the friendly confines of NRG Stadium and of his last 15 TD’s caught, 13 have been at home.

-Looking forward to the battle between Chubb and Vita Vea, the 357 pound destroyer of running lanes.

-There’s plenty of grumbling out Texas way that Houston did not fully address their offensive line woes-something to keep an eye on.

Bolts/Raiders:

-Both teams are in a great spot if they get the W, what with the Chiefs where they are and the Broncos at 1-1. Early division games matter.

-This will be the first time they’ve met with both having winning records since wk 4 of 2021.

-Carroll thinks it would be great to win, given that they have a long covered wagon trip to the east coast to meet the Providence Steamrollers.

-Sounds like Bowers is a game-timer.

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Unsurprised

Well, at least we won’t have to sit through the second half now.

0
Jimbo

Geno moar like G no make a good throw.

2
Doktor Zymm

Very considerate of the Raidurrrs to finish up the game at a relatively reasonable hour for most of the country

2
BeefReeferLives

Does the NFL have to cut out with Lunatic Fringe playing once per game or what?

1
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I hope the call comes in from New York to not let the Chargers score a touchdown before halftime or too many viewers will turn the game off and go to bed.

2
Sharkbait

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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

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Redshirt

Expert, Paid Commentator: “The purpose of this drive is to get the running game established.”

Me: “They are on their own 8-yard line with 4 minutes left. By the time they pass midfield, they’ll be 7 minutes left in Halftime!”

1
Wakezilla

Got damn the Raiders are awful. Yes, I’m aware that water is also wet.

2
WCS

Dan Marino has an disclosed liver disease, and has been receiving treatment for it.
Taking that Backyard Brawl loss really badly, I guess.

3
Unsurprised

They have a pill for Hep C now

0
Gumbygirl

I had a cat that looked like a bowling ball with legs. Her name was Hazel Jean(ty) jelly bean dancing queen!

4
Sharkbait

This windows build is so old and outdated I can’t even side load a modern browser. Linux is looking more and more appealing for this device

4
Unsurprised

Tweets from 2000.

1
Unsurprised

Pete Carroll seems intent on coaching every group of the most insufferable assholes in the world, outside of South Bend.

Last edited 7 months ago by Unsurprised
0
WCS

He’s never been with the Ravens, Iggles, or University of Maryland, though.

Yet.

0
Unsurprised

He’s been cursed with the Mark of Billy Martin to live forever in pursuit of this mission of the damned.

0
WCS

Took a call for a residence at the top of the street my parents live on, where I grew up.
I think this is house where the girl I had a YUGE crush on in high school lived.
Note, said crush was before princess walked into my life during tenth grade algebra.

Anyway, it’s an anonymous tip for possible animal abuse; said the dogs in the yard look and act like they’re mistreated. They are still outside, caller says have been all day and yesterday as well. Hasn’t seen the owners, so no idea if the dogs even have water available.

Last edited 7 months ago by WCS
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Sharkbait

Theres a special place in hell for animal abusers

5
Unsurprised

Statistically, it’s the same one for serial killers. I hope they hunt each other for eternity.

2
WCS

Exactly how they drew it up!

1
Redshirt

♫ ♪ ♬ Buttsnap. Woo-oh!

1
Doktor Zymm

So true

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BeefReeferLives

Spot!

2
WCS

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*Spock

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Unsurprised

I’ve been reading The Power Broker, and holy fuck, everyone in power who supposedly read this book, if they did, took the exact opposite lessons from it.

0
Redshirt

..and of course, after shitting the bed and rolling around in it, the Reds decided to win a game.

0
Horatio Cornblower

Holy shit what a stupid pena…Oh. Oh it’s the Raiders. Never mind.

1
King Hippo

I am pretty sure that, when I die, I will deeply regret not spending MOAR time asleep.

4
Sharkbait

You really are a cat aren’t you

5
Gatoraids

plenty of time to catch up on it then

1
Spur

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Horatio Cornblower

One of the things I do to get through, (frantically waves 1080 degrees around self), all of this, is to donate money to various environmental groups in the admittedly slim hope that there will still be clean air and water when I shuffle off my mortal coil.

I have noticed a distinct difference in the responses of various groups. My local conservation group*, for instance, sends me nice thank you notes, handwritten updates on what they’re using the money for, and invitations to various gatherings. The Audubon Society does the same.

The Sierra Club responds to my recent renewal and donation with “GIVE US AT LEAST $180 OR ALL THE WOLVES ARE GONNA DIE AND IT’LL BE YOUR FUCKING FAULT YOU CHEAP SON OF A BITCH!! AND SIGN THIS PETITION SO WE CAN SEND IT TO WASHINGTON AND SOME SENATOR CAN USE IT AS TOILET PAPER!!!”

You can probably guess who’s getting another donation and who isn’t.

*If you have a local conservation group I urge you to donate more money than you can afford to to that group, more often than you should. They’re generally underfunded but still very effective because they focus on and build off of small scale efforts that can quickly add up to something very significant. And they don’t send you shitty letters implying that you’re somehow at fault for the Yangtze River dolphin’s probable extinction.

10
Horatio Cornblower

As I continue to open mail I got another solicitation from the World Wildlife Fund, (they ask for money a lot, but they at least send me things like bookmarks and will throw in a pair of socks or Xmas wrapping), and in their update they mention efforts to save the snow leopards of Nepal which, read the room WWF, I don’t think is a priority for the Nepalese right this second!

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Sharkbait

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Horatio Cornblower

Love that one.

3
BeefReeferLives

Geno takes a play off to do the Hokey Pokey in the pocket,

then recovers to throw a strike on the next play. Nice.

Last edited 7 months ago by BeefReeferLives
1
Horatio Cornblower

That’s what it’s all about.

3
BallsofLacrosseAndMapleSyrup

Surprisingly I made it to the start of the second tilt. And prob saw the winning points, so going to bed. Or the game will go plaid but I will be asleep and won’t know until the morning

1
Horatio Cornblower

it was never in doubt, as Baker Mayfield ensures I survive another week in the DFO Eliminator Pool with, (checks notes), 9 seconds left!?

Jesus, glad I was watching the Yankees game through most of that.

2
King Hippo

Don Henley’s a lot younger than I thought. BLACKER, too (no ofence).

1
Beerguyrob

When do we get “the boxing ruined the field” takes from the broadcast team?

0
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

That’s My Raiders!

(first Raider football I’ve watched in a long time and of COURSE they turn it over on the first play from scrimmage)

6
BallsofLacrosseAndMapleSyrup

Scribbles “game over” in notebook

2
Doktor Zymm

They know you’re watching and wanted to make you feel at home!

3
BeefReeferLives

Man, Geno came out and just got punched in the jaw.

so, just like he’s back in NY.

5
Beerguyrob

A receiver DOINK into a Geno-ception.

Drink!

2
fleshwound_NPG

GENOCEPTION ALREADY?!

4
WCS

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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

That was literally me.

2
Jimbo

Mute button engaged, this guy’s voice annoys me.

0
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Did you know that Phil Collins is a huge supporter of the Alamo? He really is, like half of the artfacts there are from his personal collection.

3
Jimbo

The rental car place?

7
litre_cola

No, the steakhouse.

3
Beerguyrob

It’s like Geddy Lee being a Negro League baseball collector.

4
Horatio Cornblower

never been happier to see the words “league” and “baseball” inserted into a sentence.

/Joking aside, I think Lee recently donated something pretty incredible to the Negro League museum in KC. Something like a bunch of significant game balls. Good on him.

3
Bogdanski

Rod Stewart is a huge model train fan. Not as singular an obsession but the model train museum here in San Diego has an exhibit dedicated to him and his collection. Not sure if any of his artifacts are included

3
BugEyedBoo

Ozzy was a big airgun shooter. Has a video where he was showing off a hole he shot in his outdoor fridge.

1
Unsurprised

What about the hole in his septum?

0
Downfield Matriculator

Meh, hardly the first time Houston gave it up to a load of MRSA men

3
Mr. Ayo

That was some great timing between the two games. End of game straight into the start of the 2nd.

1
Sharkbait

In apropos of nothing, I’ve resurrected an old surface 2 tablet that had a locked down windows 8.1 RT on it, and put windows 10 on it.

/nerding out

3
Doktor Zymm

And now you can’t get the memory usage to drop below 97%?

2
Sharkbait

We’ll see how it runs. All I need it to do is log into Home Assistant so I can make it control shit.

1
Horatio Cornblower

This is how Skynet starts.

5
Gatoraids

didnt hook it up to your ZUNE?!?!

2
Sharkbait

If I could get a functioning browser on it I just might

0
ArmedandHammered

My gen 1 Zune still works and holds a charge.

1
BugEyedBoo

My nerding out has been Arduino IDE and the Cheap Yellow Display. These will intersect my airgun shooting when I steal enough Bluetooth LE code from other, better projects to let it talk to my BLE-using chronograph.

Hackers use the CYD to run network hacking tools, such as Bruce and Marauder. I set up Marauder on it once, but I really didn’t feel like running stuff like, “Deauth Attack” on my internet connection’s router so I took it back down. “No, Spectrum customer service, I don’t how how your router got bricked.”

It’s also fast enough, and old-timey games were slow enough, for the CYD to run emulators. Stole this picture, but the one I have cost all of $20, including the case.

Screenshot-2025-09-15-225008
4
Spur

I want to see Carroll take a swing at Harbaugh by halftime

5
litre_cola

Do we need these fucking musical intros? So fucking pointless, someone isn’t flipping channels when this comes on and says “hey, this is catchy I guess I will watch footed ball.”

4
BallsofLacrosseAndMapleSyrup

Also let’s see how many musical genres we can incorporate into a single song to not offend anyone but then offends everyone

1
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I haven’t seen that much magic from a Baker since Heirloom Hearth was able to fill Coach Reid’s order without having to call in extra shift workers.

1
fleshwound_NPG

the team dominating the afc south is quarterbacked by…danny dimes!

1
WCS

JUST LIKE THE GYPSY WOMAN SAID

3
Unsurprised

A gypsy woman told me I’d have two kids.

….

0
WCS

She never said “when” you’ll have them…

1
Unsurprised

…

1
Beerguyrob

I’m already sick of the Indiana Jones bullshit.

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1
Unsurprised

“We called the dog Indiana …”

0
Spur

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King Hippo

Baker threw that up for grabs, like he didn’t know teh RULES (ie, 500s could have run back a pickerception).

0
Gumbygirl

Oh, hook it to my veins. All this Texas trash going home unhappy, yesssssss!

4
Downfield Matriculator

I am not a fan or follower of either team, but JFC Houston truly appears to need some linemen on both sides of the ball.

0
Doktor Zymm

Yeah, the NFL is NAWT KIND to non-linear teams

3
Unsurprised

How about non-Euclidians?

— HPL

1
Spur

Nice play calling from the Bucs. Run that shit in.

1
Dunstan

Marshawn Lynch nods approvingly

3
fleshwound_NPG

doesnt matter the name, it is always the same

oilers, texans, lmao

3
Gatoraids

newest low by the Texans since the basement of the Alamo

6
BallsofLacrosseAndMapleSyrup

Troy needs to STFU

3
litre_cola

Forever and always

2
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Inexcusable clock management by Tampa not taking the timeout after the first down. Now they have only nine seconds left with three downs left.

2
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Moot point but I’m still irritated.

2
Downfield Matriculator

Followed by Houston running out the clock on the kickoff return (w/o any effort to razzle dazzle or otherwise make that a score). WTF?

0
Sharkbait

Make it Evans!

2
Sharkbait

Damnit

0
BallsofLacrosseAndMapleSyrup

Bob Evan’s?

3
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

These Texans are tackling like they are figments of someone’s imagination.

3
Spur

Now the The Baker has slathered Bucky in butter!

1
King Hippo

Brock Bowers, high as balls!

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