Wumbo Wednesday With Weaselo: In (Ty)rod We Trust, For Real This Time

Which is to say Tyrod Taylor is QB1 for the Jets. At least for this week. I will say, considering I drafted Fields somewhere in the mid-rounds I will consider it a substantial victory if I make the playoffs in Freezer Vodka. But anyway, Taylor in, Fields out, probably no coaches getting fired.

As opposed to Jets players getting shot, which did happen, but Kris Boyd is in stable condition.

Speaking of other injury news:

–No Penix for the rest of the year (ACL)

–Marvin Harrison, Jr. is out against DUUUUVAL (appendix)

–Our souls are questionable for Sunday (Shadeur will start for #ThePauls)

-Too Many Cooks is now any positive number of Cooks in New Orleans, which is to say Brandin Cooks has been waived by the Saints.

Great, what’s on?

Wednesday Night MACtion:

Definitely not Dolphins vs. Bills, but we’d understand you for getting confused. (Miami (OH) vs. Buffalo (Bulls), 7:00, ESPN2)

Hockey Tonight

-Really Wasting McJesus there vs. Please be Ovi’s last season (EDM vs. WSH, 7:00, TNT)

-Vichy Whalers vs. Still Not Worthy of Being “Wild” (CAR vs. MIN, 9:30, TNT)

Inside Inside the NBA (it’s just the roast of Charles Barkley by Shaquille O’Neal)

-“Dream Shake” would actually be an interesting idea if Hakeem wanted to market it vs. Not gambling on baseball, probably (HOU vs. CLE, 7:00, ESPN)

-The Jalen Brunson Memorial Cup (though he’s questionable) (NYK vs. DAL, 9:30, ESPN)

JV John Tesh:

-Fat Dog vs. ULowratio (Arizona vs. UConn, 7:00, FS1)

-Wait, isn’t this just a channel during March Madness? Though it does involve the First Four team (Dayton vs. Marquette, 7:30, TruTV)

-Well, they’re not winning football this year so screw it vs. Just like Quiet Riot did (Alabama vs. Illinois, 9:00, FS1)

May my jokes hit better than Chubby Kingman with advantage these days! Yeah, he’s running laps as we speak. Tying run on 2nd, nobody out, advantage +1, rolling an 11 will tie the game, and… nope. 13 games without a homer and counting for the guy with an 18+ homer on his card. More on that after the road trip concludes, in which there will be a Nocturnes Magazine recapping the good (Dakota Story) and the bad (Chubby, the bullpen kinda?)