Request Line: Fútbol

INT. CASA FINA RESTAURANT – DAY

The PRODUCER is seated at the bar at a cantina in Boyle Heights, drinking a Negro Modelo. The PRODUCER’s cellphone is face-up on the bar, revealing an open line to DJ 3000′. 

DJ 3000′ [O/S]: SEE, ISN’T THIS NICER THAN HANGING OUT IN THE STUFFY OLD RECORDING STUDIO?

The PRODUCER takes a long pull of his beer. 

PRODUCER: Yeah, it really is. Thanks for the suggestion. I should probably get over there as soon as I finish lunch though.

DJ 3000′ [O/S]: THERE’S NO RUSH.

PRODUCER: I know, but I promised Rikki-Tikki-Deadly and Darkest Timeline Zack Morris I’d drop by and you know how impatient those two get.

DJ 3000′ [O/S]: OH, YOU DON’T HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT THEM, I PUT TOGETHER A LITTLE SOMETHING TO KEEP THEM OUT OF YOUR HAIR FOR A WHILE…

CUT TO:

INT. DFO PRODUCTION OFFICE – DAY

JERRY O’CONNELL: I don’t know about this, it seems kind of disrespectful to Rob Reiner’s memory.

RIKKI-TIKKI-DEADLY: No, no, it’ll be great!

DARKEST TIMELINE ZACK MORRIS: We’ll market it as a tribute!

RTD: And brand it as an acronym, those are all the rage.

DTZM: [makes marquee gesture] S-B-M-2:  Gordie’s Revenge

CUT BACK:

PRODUCER: Wow, how you’d you get Jerry O’Connell to subject himself to a meeting with those two?

DJ 3000′ [O/S]: OH, HE OWES ME A FAVOR.

PRODUCER: A big one, from the sound of it.

DJ 3000′ [O/S]: YEAH, THOSE HOOKERS DIDN’T BURY THEMSELVES…

PRODUCER: Wait, did you just imply…

DJ 3000′ [O/S]: [interrupting] OH LOOK TODAY’S WORLD CUP GAMES ARE ABOUT TO START! LET’S WATCH!

The camera pans upwards to the TV above the bar, which has switched on. A second later, the camera pans to the TV remote, which is sitting untouched on the bar. 

PRODUCER: [sips his beer] Well, maybe just the first half.

DJ 3000′ [O/S]: YEAH, DON’T SWEAT IT, JUST KICK BACK AND ENJOY THE GAMES.  I’M NOT GOING ANYWHERE AND NEITHER IS HUNTER.

PRODUCER: Wait, why would Hunter not be going…

DJ 3000′ [O/S]: AND HEY, HOW ABOUT SOME TUNES AS WELL.  MAYBE SOME SONGS ABOUT FUTBOL TO GET US IN THE RIGHT SPIRIT?

PRODUCER: [eyes have glazing over as he stares at the TV] Yeah, that sounds pretty good…

DJ 3000′ [O/S]: I’LL GET US STARTED WITH AN ALL-TIMER BY THE FARM

Today’s theme is futbol, AKA soccer.  We’re looking for songs that have anything to do with the sport – whether direct tributes to the game or songs that fans have picked up and associated with various clubs and/or players and situations.  Please post links as “https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n0_pUzzL3_t0d4Y” and they should embed in the comments after you refresh.  Last week’s puzzle answer of “Half a Person” by The Smiths was requested by yeah right but claimed as the puzzle answer by SonOfSpam.  Enjoy the games today folks, please feel welcome to use today’s post as an open thread to comment on the games as well. 

 

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King Hippo

Another sunny day
We pick eleven for football
We’re playing for our lives
The referee giving us fuck all

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rx08E0b0Rs0

blaxabbath

I don’t know about everything or whatever but, it seems to me, the sooner we can wrap up this war, the sooner we can get back to Epstein Files.

scotchnaut

“We should be thinking of the children? Way ahead of you!”

-Your President

ThurberHerder

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OIRE6iw-ws4

Heavily featured in a FIFA video game around 2007

scotchnaut

Canada is a much better attacking team that I’d thought.

WCS

— German Empire near Vimy Ridge, 1917

Mr. Ayo

Poutine for everyone!

Wakezilla

Cyle Larin scored, so it should be a donair.

https://youtu.be/KVVWDoffwy4?feature=shared

King Hippo

Best version of the bestest footy song (and FUCK TOM BRADY!!!!):

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PUNgHDC7r44

scotchnaut

Promise me you’ll score David.

Mr. Ayo

¡PALO!

Wakezilla

Solid first half by Canada. They’re unlucky to be trailing

SonOfSpam
DJ TAJ

Kind of feel stupid for this

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LkJ5WLZpQkk

DJ TAJ

I know a way to make it better. Remember “The Little Rascals” just imagine Buckwheat singing this

Otay Otay Otay Otay

Gumbygirl

comment image

King Hippo

I swear, when I first saw this (live as a kid), I laughed so hard I almost stopped breathing.

scotchnaut

Mine was Chris Farley blaming his lack of success with women on a “salt imbalance”. Jesus Christ, I’m laughing as I type this.

WCS

comment image

WCS

Well, not veury gooud for the Caunucks…

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ngInPEUpuHg
My Geordie mate at WVU informed me two decades ago that this is (at least was) Newcastle’s unofficial pub song before and after every match.

SonOfSpam

Let’s hear it for everyone’s favorite mid-second-tier English team!

(just me? screw you guys)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iKNMf2TdDu4

scotchnaut

Beaver Droppings!

SonOfSpam

This is about Aussie Rules

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KuXz2108hXA

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Automatic upvote

WCS

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xou_HMcIiPA

Didn’t say which kind of Cup…

Horatio Cornblower

The Irish fans belting out ‘Fields of Athenry’ while getting blown out by Spain in Euro 2012.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fZmYv6kDutw

If that doesn’t make your hair stand up on your arms check your pulse, you’re likely dead.

SonOfSpam
Horatio Cornblower

Let’s go you fucking Canucks!!!

Don T

Again the 3rd VAR referee shafted with no chair ✅

Horatio Cornblower

He knows what he did.

SonOfSpam

Hey, remember Everclear?

“woooo” – a ghostly voice from the ether

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xK_XWH7Ryd4&pp=ygUiZXZlcmNsZWFyIHZvbHZvIGRyaXZpbmcgc29jY2VyIG1vbQ%3D%3D

SonOfSpam
Fronkenshteen

Love this. 🥹

SonOfSpam

Alanis Morissette singing the Canuckian anthem was cool, but it would’ve been cooler if she had a verse about going down on someone in a theatre.

scotchnaut

Or maybe…a song about a witch from the town of Blair?

SonOfSpam

Ok ok, to be fair, I was too busy jerking it to refresh that often.

scotchnaut

Alanis Morrissette doing the National Anthem and somehow making it about giving blowjobs in theatres. Interesting choice.

litre_cola

Took deci out of school, we made it to the pub. Am vibrating.

SonOfSpam

Not enough parents pull their kids out of school to go to a pub these days.

Gumbygirl

Nobody wants to hear about your buttplug, Litre.

scotchnaut

Sounds like he wants to cheat at chess at some point.

SonOfSpam

well hold on now

SonOfSpam
Don T

Wait:Ireland qualified—no, it’s the Ivory Coast flag.
-Every Mundial

DJ TAJ

Not sure but it’s a chance to play INXS
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ROyk9PPBMTQ

Horatio Cornblower
Don T

Woof. The Tirana stadium sights looks beautiful

WCS

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OjY6k5aTgik&pp=ygUSc29uZ3MgYWJvdXQgc29jY2Vy

I know like three songs by the Lightening Seeds, and I guess this counts.

SonOfSpam
Don T

🎶URUGUAY, TE QUEREMOS, TE QUEREMOS VER CAMPEÓN. PORQUE EN ESTA TIERRA VIVE, UN PUEBLO CON 🩵🎶
https://youtu.be/RMfGIRSdlpY?si=FB8Jwx0FZSWcUUT-

Horatio Cornblower

No.

SonOfSpam

Disagree, “Mid” and “center” are synonymous, so Fogerty’s just singing about a midfielder.

Gumbygirl

Horatio, when nobody pays attention to his rules

1000010759
Horatio Cornblower

They’re not even my rules!!

Gumbygirl

That’s right, this is Rikki’s draft thingie.

1000010837
Don T

Los Fabulosos Cadillacs immortslize a tWBS (1-0)
https://youtu.be/ksN_cekus6o?si=itALLacurC87b1h3

2Pack
Don T
Gumbygirl

I was sure some English team uses this one- I was right, it’s Milwall
https://youtu.be/FOt3oQ_k008?is=2Ttqyk51FBBD_lav

Gumbygirl

And Celtic uses it too!

Horatio Cornblower

I believe Celtic is Rod’s club of choice. He may have some connection to Milwall as well.

ballsofsteelandfury
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