A Falling Out That Doesn’t Involve A Helicopter Over The Ocean? BOOOO! Your Thursday Night Open Thread

Let’s get right in there shall we? These kindergarten-level personal dynamics must be explained to the people!

Petulant Shitheads Alert:

Of course it was just a matter of time before these narcissistic users of people turned on one another. Speaking of, I give the Rodgers/Art Smith marriage-if they somehow make it out of training camp-the first four weeks of the season before it implodes in the form of snide asides, cheeky undermining and then outright vitriol.

Play It Again, Anthony:

Colts QB Richardson has a shoulder owie and it’s the same throwing shoulder injury that ended his rookie season back in 2023. We’re slowly approaching ‘chronic’ here folks. Do you think he makes it to his age 28 season? Anyway, the future’s so bright for Danny Dimes that he’s been spotted wearing shades.

Do The Right Thing:

Derek Carr tells ESPN (regarding his retirement) that taking money from them while being injured, “wasn’t the right thing to do. Besides, there’s a rumor out there that Skinny Puppy was getting back together and I needed to be available”.

Know When To Fold ‘Em:

The Lions Frank Ragnow shut it down a few days ago, citing the wear and tear on his body. This very much reminds me of Andrew Luck’s situation-the Union Army advancing in much larger numbers, only buckshot and blind hope left, a letter to Matilda in his breast pocket… Ummm, wait… No, it was the constant battle of rehabbing injuries offseason and knowing you’re going to reinjure that and suffer new ones so you were in a Mobius Strip of taking care of your body and knowing it wasn’t going to end. The Spotrac tells me that if he invests his whalebone corset futures wisely, several of his progeny will never have to shovel out a livery stable.

Go get it.

 

 

 

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WCS

Definitely a weird amount of paranoid androids in Allegheny County tonight.

70% of non-alarm calls are of the: “i cant talk because the people out to get me are outside the room right now”

and

“i dont know who they are but they followed me my entire life they listen to my calls they know everything about them i know who they are they think i dont know what their names are they are but i do know who they are but i dont know their names they always follow me and know their names”

types of individuals we’re experiencing on D-Day Versary.

Mr. Ayo

These are like my college gf’s texts she still sends me.

2Pack

Here we go Friday, here we go
/ clap, clap…

https://youtu.be/ErXbMB9R5-0?si=fgAojsB4OnKUrFE7

Doktor Zymm

I spent a good part of today at work figuring out how to read balance sheets in German

WCS

Sehr gut, Frau Doktorb.

SonOfSpam

They use the same numbers as us.

Commas instead of periods.

BallsofLacrosseAndMapleSyrup

and spaces instead of commas

Mr. Ayo

Always good to be able to commit financial fraud in two languages.

BeefReeferLives

A = L-ÖE

2Pack

Das iz good, ya?

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

How on earth do you not have any German minions?

Doktor Zymm

Gotta audit your minions every once in a while, keep em on their toes

fleshwound_NPG

how will the haliban destroy the juggernaut okc?

through-jihad
fleshwound_NPG

most of liberal downtown seattle, circa mid-2000s: man, fuck haliburton

most of liberal downtown seattle, june 5, 2025: …however

Mr. Ayo

lol OKC. Eat shit losers.

Jimbo

9.5 point favorites, smgdh

yeah right

Taj went to bed early saying “This shit is over.”

I said “Let’s get the Cavs and Knicks opinion about that.”

These guys are fierce!

Hell of a game.

Last edited 9 months ago by yeah right
2Pack

Ciao tutti

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Dunstan

Going with a Rob Roy cocktail tonight. It’s ok, but not in my regular rotation.

BeefReeferLives

It’s been quite a while since I tried scotch. Was not a fan.

Have enjoyed drinks made with mezcal of late however, & enjoyed the smokiness. Maybe I should give it another try sometime.

litre_cola

If you enjoy smokiness, have you tried chainsmoking a pack of darts and some Vodka? – Eastern Europe

WCS

“(Is passive-aggressive condescendingly in French)”

— the French

Dunstan

99% of the time I drink scotch, it’s just a single malt neat with a few drops of water. But I was thinking of a Manhattan today and wanted to use up an ok but not great blended scotch.

Jimbo

..

Screenshot-2025-06-05-at-7.14.51 PM
litre_cola

I may have to look at Twitter for all this drama. Deleted l_c account but have a real old one that should do the trick.

BeefReeferLives

Never had an account there, but I’m imagining something like this:

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Horatio Cornblower

That’s basically it.

I’m having to unmute a lot of people for the sheer entertainment available today.

Doktor Zymm

Not worth creating a truth social account though, I’ll just read the summaries other people put together

Senor Weaselo

I accepted a drink from the party planner after this New York corporate party I just played.

You know, like a fucking gentleman.

(And only got slightly razzed from the boys about being offered a drink from a lady. But the business pays to be charming.)

Last edited 9 months ago by Senor Weaselo
BeefReeferLives

You had no choice. It would have been rather rude to refuse her gracious hospitality.

Senor Weaselo

They both bounced, and as the leader on the gig it falls to me to be endearing!

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Her both what bounced?

WCS

Boobs, and the check she gave him.

2Pack

Gotta play the gig man…
I hope she was also attractive.

Senor Weaselo

Very lovely and was our point person the whole evening.

And is originally from the same neighborhood as Senorita Weaselo and has ties to my neighborhood in how she met her fiancé, so we toasted to that.

2Pack

You can’t beat a little time chatting with a lady.

litre_cola

Are the leopards eating each other’s faces? That’s hot.

BeefReeferLives

Gotta wonder if this is all just some kayfabe heel turn shit.

SonOfSpam

Occam’s Razor is that when two malignant narcissists get together, the good times ain’t gonna last.

King Hippo

But the sex is always HAWT, I’m sure they both miss it.

Unsurprised

Jesus Christ

The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem

They are both heels.

Also, this is so incredibly expensive for Musk, I’m not buying any 4D Chess theory

BugEyedBoo

The Genius That Is Trump doesn’t know what groceries are.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

That’s the way I see it. I refuse to tune in.

Doktor Zymm

Rearranged the fancy whiskey I have in Chicago

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Gumbygirl

You have a book about Malort. By the way, shouldn’t it be Maalort, because I would imagine a Maalox chaser would be perfect with that? I have no plan to test this combo myself, because I’m not completely insane, but some of yinz are! And it’s such a missed marketing opportunity.

Last edited 9 months ago by Gumbygirl
litre_cola

I enjoy drinking Malort with BC Dick. We killed the bottle.

Gumbygirl

And you’re both insane! Perfect!

Doktor Zymm

Or MAYBE it should be Mälox!

Gumbygirl

Hmmm, two umlauts might bring on the singularity. Or at least an oompah band and even more National Socialism. We probably shouldn’t risk it.

LemonJello

Can I get your opinion of the Larceny, Dok?

Doktor Zymm

I like everything on there, but I’m gonna go pour myself a dram and give you something more specific

Doktor Zymm

It’s the B524 batch barrel strength, quite hot, peppery and wood and spice, not sweet at all for a straight bourbon, overall very enjoyable

Sharkbait

I am extremely jealous of your whiskey collection. I’ll be in Chicago the weekend of the 19th, and I’m going to do my best to foist malort shots onto my friends I’m going with.

King Hippo

It’s hard to watch a sporting contest when you can’t find even the slightest reason to root for either side.

Brady P*ts v. Q-aron Stillers?

BeefReeferLives

That’s when you root for the brutal hits & pain.

Redshirt

I wonder if Vontaze can come back for a game.

BeefReeferLives

That would be just Burfict.

litre_cola

That is exactly what went through my THC addled mind

Gumbygirl

Oh my God, I love this place!

King Hippo

And the reference made me think of Balky and Cousin Larry

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Cousin Larry went to my high school!

BeefReeferLives

Baked minds think alike

Horatio Cornblower

/pours one out for VontazeMeBro

Unsurprised

I’m looking forward to seeing how Trump exploits the fact that without the Shanghai gigafactory, Musk is homeless in a week.

LemonJello

TRUMP! MUSK! THUNDERDOME! TWO SHITTY HUMAN BEINGS ENTER, NEITHER ONE LEAVES!

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Last edited 9 months ago by LemonJello
Doktor Zymm

Escalating!

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Gumbygirl

He may have planted one of those exploding chips in Trump’s head while he was snoozing. Mutually Assured Destruction!

Unsurprised

Remember, both of these fucktards have fans who wear T-shirts gloating about helicopter rides. This will end in the dumbest way possible. Meanwhile, I’m fully on the side of this random Seinfeld producer.

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Redshirt

Okay, between Reta—-, uh, Very Special Person JP Morgan and Liver Spot Analogue, I’m on Team Musk. At least he earned his money.

ballsofsteelandfury

He’s an asshole. They both deserve each other

SonOfSpam

No, he’s a trust fund nepo baby just like Trump. I’m rooting for a fight to the death. Of all of them.

Gumbygirl

Good idea! More drugs for Bannon!

Doktor Zymm

Just got a rather garbled compliment on my tattoo from a streetperson, however all my tattoos were covered so either he has a very specific depth of x-ray vision or he was so stoned that he thought the decal on my backpack was a tattoo. Which was it? You be the judge!

Redshirt

Not necessarily. He could be your stalker and he remembers your tattoos from when you showered.

BeefReeferLives

Wasn’t that Knick Knack?

SonOfSpam

Mrs Paddywhack. Give the frog a loan.

Last edited 9 months ago by SonOfSpam
LemonJello

Watch your ankles! Lowratio won’t let you besmirch his hero like that!

BrettFavresColonoscopy

His old man’s a rolling stone

Redshirt

Elon Musk vs. Donald Trump (Artistic Interpretation)

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Don T

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Horatio Cornblower

Mets announcer just now: “Aaron Rodgers signs with the Steelers (pause). Good for them!”

Gumbygirl

It’s pretty fucking gross, I feel icky.

BugEyedBoo

I agree, but your choice is that or Rudolph the Racist Reindeer, now with added MAGA!

Gumbygirl

Jeeesus.

Unsurprised

Time to reenact the Heinz Field scene from of Dark Knight Rises.

fleshwound_NPG
Horatio Cornblower

Probably figuring out how they can deport all those South Africans they just let in to Djibouti.

LemonJello

With Great Value Goebbels, he’s probably seeing if they can deport people to the Marianas Trench.

litre_cola

This is going to get spicy, does Musky have a robot army?

SonOfSpam

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Don T

Had to look it up immediately

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😂🤣