When I shot that photo there was no God, anywhere.

“Oh great, nothing good ever happens when the big blow hard shows up with his grand special effects and so-called spiritual antidotes”.

“What the hell is the exalted Peckerhead doing here anyway?”

[The skies open and the holy voice of God speaks]

“Fear not, for I have come with the promise of the, wait, did you call me Peckerhead?”

Peckerhead?

Satan starts mumbling, “Haven’t seen his old ass in what 8,9 years,and now he shows up and I’m supposed to kiss his, What?”

“He’s right behind me?

Dang it.”

“Oh hey G, long time no see.”

“Look Beez I know we’ve had let’s say our ‘troubles’ in the past, but I need your help.

It’s a very special moment in time that’s occurring right now. A moment that will change all the worlds forever. A rather urgent matter is afoot and I’ll need your assistance in this shall we say “delicate matter.”

“So, let me get this straight. You want my help?”

“As stated it’s of utmost importance and I am ready to pay the heaviest of tithe for your intervention.”

“A tithe, a tithe? I will command a tithe of blood. The blood of the just, the blood of innocence.”

“Listen Archfiend, I am forced into a tight place with an American football team that is horrible but must be saved for the good of all mankind.”

“A what? You want me to change reality for….”

“Not that footy nonsense but real football. An NFL team. To be more specific the team that plays in the very center of the creation of all that is holy. The very beginning of all of life that matters, there is but one place. The magi golden city down in the swamps of Louisianan, and If you think I’m going to stand by and watch as my beloved favorite city and football team gets it’s, what’s that?

No. It’s not the God Damn Cowboys. It’s the Hagios.

The set apart.

The chosen pietist.

The Saints you plebeian, barbaric, godless miscreants!”

“Jesus he do get to bloviating don’t he? Look Jehovah no one believes in Santa Claus or deity’s anymore, It’s too late it’s already been consummated.”

“Alright listen up dark stain from my bathroom rug you are starting to annoy me. You simply have no say in the right proper way of things and in the end you’ll kneel and pray just like all the stupid, vicious, pious followers of all my gospel lies and If not I will give your floating head a right smack with my 9 iron.”

“Jaws flappin’ like the porous Saints secondary I see. You and your pompous readings. Take a breath G, calm down, I get it. The Saints are stuck in a huge suck hole with no way out for at least the next 11 years. I feel your frustration but you are considering a task that once done can’t be undone, you don’t even have legs big fella so let’s discuss.”

“I do in fact have legs. Hey TAJ get to drawing me some damn pins post haste so I may smote this foul splotch will ya?”

Was I writing or was I drinking. Was I drinking or was I writing?

Holy Christ, God needs feet? Better get right on that.

I have corrupted the order of things that we hold dearest.

“I’ll right numen, let’s say I accept your proposal. I still need to know what your terms are for a ‘Successful’ season.”

So Adorable. Simply can’t wait to see it bleed.

“Not looking to change heaven and earth just looking to get over the “proverbial” hump if you will. Have you seen their quarterback room?”

“Only the sacrifice of the innocent will quell the blood lust percolating in the cauldrons of the doomed and you know it, keeper of the lead astray.”

“I Do fear sadly that only the oblation of the virtuous will suffice. You see I got 666-1 odds for them to win more than 5 games.”

“Wait blessed Shaitan you can’t go through with this?”

“It’s cool Witchy, there is no chance the big puss bag will sacrifice a chicken much less the small and meek. I’m just giving him the business for being such an ass all these years.

Your choice holy man, time is running. You must use the golden sword of justice and strike dead an innocent child for a 7 win New Orleans Saints football team in the year of your lord 2025.

You must choose.

And they call me the evil one. Here we are, the holder of sheep and keeper of stuff no one wants is advocating for the murder of a child for a football bet?”

See how it just kind of flops into place, neat huh?

“There is no way that big sissy will lop off that babies head, “No Chance, I Mean EVER will his whole God fearing..”

One quick swing of the cutlass followed immediately by the sound of spurting.

The sound of spurting?

Spurting? Dude

“Now you just hold on there one sec would ya?

So you wrote a story in which the devil talks the all mighty into killing a baby so a football team can perform in a mediocre fashion?

You sure you want to go through with this?”

We have now arrived at some silly football facts but all anyone really cares about is will the baby be butchered?

Just look around, everyone you see, and I do mean everyone, even you. Think that the Saints are going to suck.

February the seventh In the year of your lord 2010. A miracle did eventualize. 15 years later?

Running out the same 5-12 team they ran out last season. No worries. As of this writing every team in the league has announced a starting quarterback, well, all but one. Want a guess at which team is the negative number in that equation?

What am I supposed to do? Not watch?

Like that is ever going to happen.

Alright dear reader, two things. I want to hear your Saints win totals and there is a very disturbing (sort of) baby losing it’s head drawing that will only be revealed if you good folks have the desire to see it.

How many wins and do you want to see the baby bleed?

Ave Satanas!

All photos, drawings and stupidity is all TAJ Who Sucks fault.

08/2025

Went back and looked at some of my past ravings and noticed since I started this annual silliness my team has been abysmal.

If that continues on into next year I cant swear I’ll be back.

I’ll go first. Saints will go 7-10 and will be damn competitive in “most” of their games.

Thanks to my constant editor and instigator in some of these night terrors my beloved brother, Old what’s his face.