NYG @ TB: JPP’s Back! will not be talked about nearly as much as his missing digits. If he can do something/anything to help it would be much appreciated by the league leader in yards allowed. Couple that with being last in the league in sacks and you’ve got a functional alcoholic examining his options. Thanks Steve Spagnuolo. LB Kwon Alexander won his second Defensive Rookie of the Week award under trying circumstances. His nickname is Genghis Kwon. Tampa came out with a win in OT against the Falcons last week despite blowing a 17 point lead. I expect the Giants to blow that sort of lead this week.
Atl @ SF: How do the Falcons come away with a win here? I think it all comes down to “don’t f*ck up”. They’ve given the ball away 12 times in the last four games-that’s got to stop. Things must be bad when as an organization you turn to QB Gabbert to solve your problems. Weird stat: In his last 4 games Kaep did not, repeat, not turn the ball over-no Int’s or fumbles. 30 yr. old RB Thomas joins this rapidly sinking ship. He hasn’t seen any action since being set adrift by the Saints last March. His legs should be fresh and ready to go though, right?
Den @ Ind: If I was a schedule-maker back in the spring I would have paired these two up in a heartbeat. Now it doesn’t look all that great. Peyton has been up and down all year long. His game-day QBR’s have ranged from 25.2 (2 weeks ago vs. Cleveland) to 93.6 (last week vs. Green Bay) Luck is 7th in QBR in the fourth quarter of games and dead last for the first three. I doubt he’ll put things together against the Denver D. Retread Rob Chudzinski who has been with The U (blarf!), Cleveland, the Chargers, Cleveland again, the Chargers again, Carolina, Cleveland again and now the Colts will set things right for the O. You just watch.
Non Cardinals Buzzsaw reference? FOUL!
Who thought it was a good idea to put Tomsula in all that brown?!
Can’t see the Philly cheese-steak stains
BY HODOR’S BEARD
Why we can’t have nice things, simply explained:
1) The Donks can’t beat the Clots.
2) The Clots can’t beat the P*ts.
3) fin.
God dammi the Jets are like fucking Tinkerbell, if you believe, they can win. THEY CAN BEAT NEW ENGLAND.
I’m gonna go have another shot before I commit this to long term memory.
Prepare yourselves to get really, really jelly yet again in February, you guys.
As long as they’re not also 19-0, because then I think we riot.
The rest of their schedule is about .400, easiest of the undefeated teams left.
They are going to get it, this time.
Eli, you’re our only hope…….
They play the only team to give them an actual contest again, at least once, this season. Yes, I mean the Jets, and no, I’m not so drunk I won’t recall saying that soon.
I hope.
Baby horses? Baby horses.
THE STUDENT OVERTAKES THE MASTER.
By which I mean the baby horse is ahead of the adult horse.
Talk to ya in a bit, when I rapidly get bored with the bar I walk to.
ah, it was a good run, my beloved horsey team. a damned good run.
Competent Clots?
There were times when this was not rare… long, long ago
http://i.imgur.com/VkhvKmp.gif
AH GAD JUST FUCKING SHUT IT PHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEL
He makes me want to gouge out my ear-eyes!
http://thewondrous.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/12/Shocking-Ads01-600×793.jpg
I have deaf family members, and damn if every now and again I don’t think of them like this.
I am going to get rich by inventing a Phil Simms mute button.
“Phil Simms Mute Button” is what I named the .50 Cal round I just chambered in my sniper rifle.
whiff gralen
I went with the red. This is it btw :
What a lovely pelvic symphysis you have my dear.
I’m a little concerned about that spot by the third rib.
So is your mom a doctor and your dad a Social Distortion album?
Damn, that was clever.
All right, Trevor.
You’ve teased the boys on the computer long enough.
Homework time!
Geez mah, no fro yo?
After you’re done.
Would like to play house? House the t.v. show I mean, I could use that dress as one of my x-rays and then diagnose you.
It’s never lupus.
Except for that one time. When it was.
OH WHAT THE EVERLOVING FUCK I AM TOO DRUNK FOR THIS SHIT
Goodluck being awake for the night game.
As I’ve said before, I’m very good at what I do (and, at the point where chemical additives are no longer necessary).
I have Eagles Fan family. They must be mocked. So I will be awake.
Godspeed.
I don’t like this Denver turning all back to poop.
Their pacing themselves. Lulling the baby ponies in a false sense of security.
Wow…did I just type “their” for “they’re”. Holy shit….am way too sober.
Heh. I’d have done that without noticing right now.
What you get when you combine Manningbot with Andrew Luck
http://www.r3vlimited.com/gallery/files/2/2/1/4/0/amish_robot.jpg
I imagined PeyPey with a neckbeard, my imagination harms me intensely.
Ugh, is there any rapper more obnoxious than Macklemore?
Replace “rapper” with “human.”
I know, he cries when climaxes! So sensitive!
Um, what the hell is this, Denver?
I must admit I sometimes miss the asshole Pats fans we used to have. Do you think they’re still trying to log on at that “other” place?
NOONE DENIES THIS
So drunk and laughing at this right now
As a (supposedly rational) Pats fan, I do not. I quite like not having the discussion dragged down around here by 20+ IQ points.
At least, without alcohol, that is.
One of my best friends is a Pats fan, and I find him intelligent, compassionate, and generally a lot of fun to be around. And then every week or so he reminds me he roots for New England and I have to threaten him.
But if anyone ELSE does it….
Afternoon people! Missed all the morning games :(. Fuck the Packers!
Salutations homos and shemos. It appears I haz arroved in time to experience most the the Hippo’s bitching live, rather than having to read it later. That calls for a drink!!!
http://www.back9network.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/07/Chevy_Drink_Caddyshack3.gif
Cuse destroyed the South Florida Whatevers.
I wouldn’t call what we did any sort of destruction, considering the level of competition. But on the other hand, dropping an exhibition would be sooooo NC State.
If Cat Barber goes down, we iz in trubble.
I literally had to look up this player to know who in televised sports could have the pseudonym “Pussy Shaver”
Power Kitteh
You should probably drink A LOT, in order to understand where I am right now, and thus experience what I am currently calling “humor” much more easily.
Still more missed FGs.
Good to know I’ll be having EagleCam POV nightmares for the next week.
Where’s Joe Jurivicious when you need him?
/yeah, I know I spelled her wrong
Going red. It’s less office friendly and I’ve stretched what I can wear to the office to the limit. These late game scores confuse and infuriate me. Despite my fandom, I do want the Giants to win the NFC East…so…go Giants? I guess? WTF baby horses?
That was Skeleton, yes?
Manning and Luck leading the league in picks halfway through the season.
You could have gotten some pretty good odds on that.
Remember all, skirts are OK, but not pants:
http://31.media.tumblr.com/207c9d04a56a4d3e58b2b52cf863dd44/tumblr_mqdlzzjfBK1s33f0ro1_400.gif
Kilts, the official garment of the Commentist Party!
http://38.media.tumblr.com/55466eda31677e264f3b4e387ebbc8de/tumblr_nx94001gon1r09l2vo1_400.gif
That’s making me dizzy.
Shit Weaveworld was REAL
Honey, you haven’t lived until you have seen Matthew Perry put on a pair of tightie-whiteys at the Ottawa Country Club!
PeyPey with 69 yards passing now, nice
CUE THE MANNINGFACE
The oldest wants to be fed. What part of “the Giants are playing” does he not understand?
You’d think he’d know better by now.
He’s a glutton…for punishment.
Fucking kids. Doesn’t he know how to hunt by now?!
Plenty of raccoons nearby, son.
That. Is. So. Cool.
(I draw fucked up shit as a hobby, leave me be)
I’ve put on leggings. I’m going out. Which t-shirt dress, skeleton, or creepy face?
creepy face
The Oxford comma was not your friend there. But I say skeleton, because I enjoy such things.
Skeletor.
http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m4b9qkCQFY1qkw3xco6_500.jpg
Further information, skeleton is red, creepy face is black. Otherwise, they’re the same cut and size.
Further info not required, still rock the skeleton.
Well, wait. Hair color *is* a factor (I’m an artist, I *know things*).
Your only options?
No, but I’m drunk and these are both comfortable and people tell me they’re pretty hot.
Go with your heart.
Sexy Dave Foley.. you have one of those right?
Like…Kids in the Hall Dave Foley?
I am going to draw SOMETHING at the end of this night, and when I wake up tomorrow, I’m gonna post it so you can all see what alcohol does to fine motor control.
*insert drunken supportive statement here*
See, this is where a sober person would say “you do not need support, you need control.”
Where is MY Lucy Lui Sober COMPAnion… that is too many caps… anyway?!
Giants aren’t afraid of the Darkwa.
Hilarious how loud the Giants fans are in teh pirate ship.
I was going to say “They had a really fast turnaround at MetLife. A whole several minutes!”
Florida sports fans suck. Florida has a lot of other shit to do, so they don’t go to sporting events (fuck ME that was hard to type), so you get fans of “teams that travel well” in the stands at every home game. Just move THOSE teams. No one will care.
Matty Ice vs. Blaine Gabbert for the title of “greyest man in football”
“Who are ‘People you will not notice in a crowd’ for $800, Alex?”
I see a terrible sitcom starring them and Joe Flacco in the works on CBS. It’ll be the biggest hit ever.
Oh, you said greyest… I got a little offended I wasn’t mentioned there for a second!
Denver, what are you doing? The Colts suck.
Someone please explain to me why Fox is showing a re-play of a Formula E race from Malaysia…
Wrong Fox channel?
It was a pretty good race though.
Pretty awesome until I realized they weren’t combustion powered and I can probably bike faster than some of those cars.
They’re like a really fast golf cart. It’s not F1, but for something different, the races are usually pretty exciting.
HAS to be the latest the Fat Humps have had the roof open.
Oh shit Jeem and Phil in close proximity to PeyPey
Fumblelina!
These early games just won’t end
Yes they go on and on my friend.
hey guys
Well at least the Bears game went well! They have a 10 game winning streak against the Twinks.
I was dead-on about Hurns-somebody beer me!
I have 14 Mich Ultras left… sending one along ASAP.
Pretty sure if you keep going at this pace you will be out by halftime.
I’m very good at what I do. And soon I will reheat pizza, because even I know a machine *this* fucked needs fuel.
Although, by halftime of ONE of these games (I just had to type “games” three times, each time it came out “ganes”), one of the TVs will become YouTube channel and things could get weird from there.
Don’t spill it on the tubes-you’ll wreck my computer!
Silly goose, the computer is not a series of tubes…. tha’s the *internet*
THE FLOW RETURNS!
Er… is that weird? Especially when I yell it?
And, uh… sorry about the carpet.
Alterraun Verner can’t even spell his favourite planet correctly. SMGDH.
It’s as if a million nerds cried out and were suddenly silenced…
People need to get over here. Switching back and forth between threads is having a lot of Unintended Shot Consequences.
You mean like having more of them than you thought?
Just faster than I thought. Yay more people!
Ah shit I’m back in this thread… one second.
Wow, so the “No Defense” Giants are here today.
Have you seen the “With Defense” Giants?
Not this year.
Wooo! Jets win and I still have 18 beers left!
I see you having an Ultra good time!
Thread change shots kept me from replying faster, but so far, this is an entertaining experiment. I’m not gonna fuckin repeat it, but it IS interesting.
Stinking G-men. Get your shit together.
Ok so I’m thinking…
Indy +3
Cowboys +3
And Falcons -8
A tall black man give Buddy the finger outside Raymond James Stadium, it turns out it was Mr. Pierre-Paul giving me a high five.
And by high five, I mean a prostate massage.