A far less cynical commenter than I pointed out to me that this game isn’t exactly “eye poison”. Let’s take a look at this half-full game with some rose-coloured glasses, shall we?
Ten @ Jax: The Jags are 2-2 at home and with a win will tie the Luck-less Colts for first place in the AFC South. Bortles is tied for the league lead in game-winning drives. All three victories were the result of him marching his team down the field in the waning minutes for the last score. Not too shabby. Fantasy-wise the Jags feature the highest-scoring WR duo. Robinson made a bit of a splash last year but the real revelation is Hurns. He was the guy I made fun of in a snarky post at the beginning of the season. Well, he’s scored a TD in 7 straight, averages 17 yards a catch and caused me to place my tail between my legs when I picked him up off the waiver wire a few weeks ago. QB Mariota (do we have a nickname for this guy yet-I think he’ll be around for a dozen years or so) has thrown for 4 TD’s and no intercepts twice. He’s in a bad, interim-coach situation and hasn’t completely shit the bed which bodes well for his future but not his early development.
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I thought Zac Brown was the country asshole who threw water in football asshole JJ Watt’s face in that one commercial? I’m so confused.
“Bortles has a streak going…” Good thing he’s wearing that uniform then, maybe it’ll hide it.
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All of these “inspiring music” commercials make me wonder how pro athletes refrain from slitting their fucking wrists every minute of every day.
I want this ad to come to life as a cockroach so I can stomp it to death.
CRUSH PORN WOO
HEY SUCCOP YOU STINK
Manning is out for some time.
http://41.media.tumblr.com/b57fc9a6057d3f2ffb033f6ba89222cf/tumblr_nq32neqtE31spnykgo1_1280.jpg
LEAD IS STILL SURMOUNTABLE.
At least next Thursday is Thanksgiving. Food, booze and actual football.
Your backyard touch football game with drunk cousins will be higher quality than this…dreck.
http://gifrific.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/Subaru-Pass-Spin-Win.gif
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3NFILApRhIw
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Evening folks. I have to ask: HOW BAD IS IT?
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Imagine the Titans and Jaguars, playing in the usual shitty TNF game.
(friend whispers frantically in my ear)
Wait, you mean that’s ACTUALLY happening right now?! This isn’t a fucking test pattern or some shit?!
Your brain is trying to protect you from The Awful Truth
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NIO1rQaTiWk
http://www.best-gif.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/01/funny-gifs-pom-popom-popom.gif
A boy named Fu
HELL 2 DA NAW!!
Chad Henne is rockin that pornstache.
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There’s a lot going on on that Titans hat.
My feed froze. I’m not really that bothered.
And people said God didn’t answer prayers.
How will the goats make it through winter?!?! You’ll have to sell the farm!
Fuck it, this is terrible. I’m going to go find some porn.
Do they have porn on the internet these days?
http://40.media.tumblr.com/060acf3da4e4b1df78efdd5edb513499/tumblr_n8440t0A1r1skkfpco1_1280.jpg
According to something I Read earlier, they had to take down all the Traci Lords stuff, so maybe not.
75 to 1; let’s call it even.
Screw you.
Man, beat someone to *1* joke….
Hey I admitted my mistake with incorrect information in regard to porn history; I’ll try to do better next time.
I understand that Traci Lords is available.
GAAAAAHHHHH FUCK YOU NFL STOP PLAYING SHIPPING UP TO BOSTON IN EVERY GOD DAMN STADIUM, YOU FUCKS!!!!!!
http://41.media.tumblr.com/1bdc6a864a9c4833855f5cd93bfdb24d/tumblr_nq7rv1KJHC1qc1yc7o1_500.jpg
If it stops that song, I’ll take it.
OSZ, aren’t you happy you get to watch football this weekend?
It’s true, free of any Titans snuff films being broadcast to my area, it’ll be great.
Aside from the likely Chargers loss.
If they make the extra point I believe that qualifies as an insurmountable lead.
Needs to be 2+ field goals ahead.
Quack, quack.
THEY RUINED A PERFECT GAME
MURIATO!!!!!
Hey! A double-field goal!
No one the field believes that just happened.
Walker was a decoy!
Concussion is an important thing in the NFL. But the guy that horizontally piledrove himself in the wall is a-okay to play.
What is the proper expression for when a player gets a spinal injury from crashing into the spinal injury stretcher?
Crib death
I can’t even tell if people are injured or just tired of playing in this game.
I’m glad Norm MacDonald is getting paid, and if it’s to the detriment of the same people who didn’t find him funny on SNL, then all the better
THIS GAME, I CALL IT GONE WITH THE WIND ‘CAUSE IT’S GONNA BE OVER THREE PLUS HOURS OF MY LIFE I’LL NEVER GET BACK AND FRANKLY MY DEAR I’M TOO DRUNK TO GIVE A DAMN
SCARLETT WAS DRUNK TOO
http://45.media.tumblr.com/9eda2a1932f9a31c4628acf734c19372/tumblr_ms6zzhgkgg1rkqoe8o2_500.gif
Holy shit.
Half right!
Time to make homemade hot chocolate mix, because I’m worth it.
All you need is whole milk, Hershey’s cocoa and sugar. Heat milk in microwave for 2 minutes, two regular teaspoons of sugar, two heaping teaspoons of cocoa powder, stir and thank me later.
You email me an address and I’ll send you some, and you can compare it.
Deep throw, PI
Deep throw, PI
Run three times, stuffed
Field Goal
PFTCommenter: cumz
Tony Fasano’s Football :stretch:
Damn it. The Cowboys ruined it. We could have had a light blue versus dark blue game. That would have been fun.
http://national.suntimes.com/national-sports/7/72/2157203/nfl-reveals-color-rush-jerseys-cowboys-panthers-thanksgiving-game
Well the Cowboys should look terrific as they go 2-9.
SPLOOOSH.
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So I cut way back on my beer drinking to get in better shape, (I’m aiming for Rhonda Rousey), and one of the side benefits is being a cheap drunk. Two beers tonight, (OK, one was a pint+ of Arrogant Bastard) and I am buzzing very nicely.
Welcome to my life/tolerance level!
Say, What are you wearing?
Sadly I am still wearing pants.
Debating getting into the whiskey, because this has been a very long couple of months at work and I am working from home tomorrow and can probably do that with a headache.
In which case, adios pantalones!
Talk to me when the banana hammock makes an appearance.
Coming home late, worrying that I’ve missed football.
Oh…. oh. Well. Never mind.
This football-like substance brought to you by: Meth
This game shall have OVVVVVERTIIIIIIME
It shall go FG/FG/TIE
Why are we all watching this? We’re only encouraging them. We should tell a responsible adult where the Thursday Night Game touched us.
This is why we’re watching this:
http://40.media.tumblr.com/1b956447b2e49d14897575805b2cbe12/tumblr_nxxv57Uytj1uf51wyo1_540.jpg
Jared put his pee-pee thing into my pee-pee and poo-poo place. It made me feel weird.
FIELD GOOOOOOAAAAALLLLLL!!!!!!!!
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