Your Sunday Night Fight Open Thread

Cin @ Ari: Despite what your brain might tell you, you’re looking at two of the best QB’s in the league right here. Cincy is the dog in this one spread-wise. Since the start of the 2013 season they are 11-2-1 when occupying that status. Go for it, right? [slams the brakes] Hold on there, tiger-Dalton is 1-5 in prime time games. WR’s John Brown, Floyd and Fitz are all fighting injuries. If you happen to be in a 20 team league (raises hand) you may want to take a look-see at one Jaron Brown and pick him the hell up (done!) As much as I liked the Hopkins/Revis matchup earlier, I think the Green/Peterson battle looks even better. By the by, get yerself ready for some tired Palmer vs. His Former Team crap, despite the fact that he’s played against them before. Your re-run narrative awaits!

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WCS

NOW DO THAT 18 MORE TIMES

blaxabbath

The Red Zone is the place to get cute.

Old School Zero

I thought the place to get cute was the butthole.

Romonobyl

“Sorry honey, it must have slipped in’.

Old School Zero

REAL TALK: it’s impossible for it to just ‘slip in’. Anyone who brags that they just ‘slipped it in there’ is lying their face off.

Sill Bimmons

Or has a needle dick.

Lothar of the Hill People

That’s what my wife said during her last period.

WCS

Remember when Mel Kiper and Todd McShay said Andre Smith was going to be better than Anthony Munoz?

Sill Bimmons

Wrong And Wronger

Redshirt

What?! Munoz was pure muscle and athletic talent. Smith is a chocolate-flavored Stay Puft Marshmallow Man.

Lothar of the Hill People

THIS GUY ANDY DALTON, I CALL HIM DOUCHEBAG BECAUSE HE HAS CRAPPY HAIR AND I JUST HATE GUYS WITH CRAPPY HAIR AND OH MY GOD I SNORTED TOO MUCH COKE SOMEONE CALL 9-1-1 I’M NOT JOKING GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH THERE ARE SPIDERS ON ME! SOMEONE CUT MY COKE WITH BORAX! AGAIN!

Sill Bimmons

You should really just assume that the coke is cut with Borax at this point.

Sill Bimmons

wtf

JustStopDude

Terrible punt by Carson there….

ballsofsteelandfury

Field goals for the field goal gods!

Col. Duke LaCross

You just kinda know there’s gonna be a Palmer mysterious arm injury announcement tomorrow.

Redshirt

Yup.

Redshirt

WHERE WAS THAT LAST MONDAY, YOU DOUCHBAGS!?

I mean…

GOOD PLAY, GREEN!

WCS

THROW IT EIFERT YOU CHEESEFUCKS

blaxabbath

I blame this all on Peter King.

WHO THE FUCK THOUGHT LETTING THAT PIECE OF SHIT HANG AROUND WAS A GOOD IDEA?

Romonobyl

Palmer is channeling his inner fetus-head.

King Hippo

Not fair, PeyPey can’t throw that far.

ballsofsteelandfury

That counts as a punt!

King Hippo

HAI, Oakland Carson Palmer!!

Lothar of the Hill People

Why punt when you can throw a 45-yard INT?

It’s like a pre-emptive punt.

WCS

Nice punt, Carson.

Sharkbait

The fuck was that?

Redshirt

Thank you Carson!

blaxabbath

This game will have no TDs under 45 yards.

Recovery Whiskey

Calling it 16-13

Lothar of the Hill People

Why do they advertise Google apps when every goddamn Android phone comes with it pre-installed?

ballsofsteelandfury

Exactly. No one is going to buy it. Is it to make people aware the Android Siri exists?

ballsofsteelandfury

This is going to be a puntfest, isn’t it?

King Hippo

These teams are pretty good at stopping the obvious up the middle run play

blaxabbath

Is this some kind of ode to Caldwell with all the obvious playcalls?

Recovery Whiskey

At night I drink myself to sleep

Sill Bimmons

And pretend I don’t care
that you’re not here with me

Lothar of the Hill People

True fact:

The first few times I heard his name, I thought his name was Huge Action, and they called him that because he favored play-action passes where an oversized FB got the fake.

Romonobyl

The Whiz, starring R. Kelly.

WCS
blaxabbath

Good see ARI is still giving up 10 yards to the halfback outlet pass that Brees pulled off like 15 times in Week 1.

Recovery Whiskey

Knowin when a body says hello they won’t talk to anybody they don’t know

Sill Bimmons

Recovery! Whiskey! Sexy!

blaxabbath

The Bengals have cool helmets but their B logo is gay af.

Redshirt

YES! Completely Agreed! My theory is Mike Brown paid someone to make that when he was threatening to move the team to Baltimore in ’94, but decided that he didn’t want to waste the money by not using it.

WCS

The Wiz Live!: Watch and hope someone falls into a piece of scenery

Sharkbait

Or someone offs themselves like in the original!

Lothar of the Hill People

Maybe Allison Williams will get her salad tossed by a black guy in a Tin Man suit on live TV!

Lothar of the Hill People

What dad carries a click-sharpie with him to his son’s peewee football game?

A: The type of asshole who writes on peoples’ cars when he doesn’t like how they park, or they have a rainbow bumper sticker.

Sharkbait

Or Jim Harbaugh

Redshirt

♪ Two steps forward, One toe shot off. ♪

Lothar of the Hill People

FRAGS FOR THE FRAG GOD!

blaxabbath

Marvin Lewis looks like he’s see war.

King Hippo

UNDER ONE ROOF!

King Hippo

CJ2K…if he got about 1/2 of his nickname tonight, I would have a shot?

blaxabbath

Hope the NBC camera is on Iupati when blood begins just gushing out of his ears.

bourb0nblues

Quite enjoyed hearing The Refreshments heading into that commercial break.

Lothar of the Hill People

Did they play “Banditos?” I mute like a gunslinger.

bourb0nblues

Yup.

Lothar of the Hill People

At least it’s more current than the 90s grunge they play when Seattle’s on.

Lothar of the Hill People

Who goes to a car dealership on Black Friday? What car dealership needs Black Friday to make money?

blaxabbath

Car dealers capitalize on people being chumps.

It max-Chumpness on Black Friday.

blordinaryfagicmox

Buying a car does not count as SAVING money!

WCS

The ones owned by Josh Brent and Donte Stallworth?

Sill Bimmons

You can actually get some really amazing deals because it’s basically the last weekend of the year anyone goes out to buy cars.

Dealers know that it’s their last chance to get rid of shitty inventory/take losses before EOB. It’s not about making money, its about working the books.

King Hippo

At halftime, Flight of the Conchords should sign the Cheer Up Murray/”Ginger Balls” song

JustStopDude

Fuck me I just now got to my parents’ place in Baltimore. I81 was a disaster. Fucking 5 hour drive took 9.

On a positive, got to hear the Skins commentators practically call Cam the N word as Carolina blew them out of the water.

blaxabbath

That is awesome.

Senor Weaselo

So… Slurs gonna slur?

King Hippo

The fuck Jeremy Hill have to taunt about??

blaxabbath

He’s rich, bitch!

Sill Bimmons

haha

Redshirt

What the fuck, Hill?!

Spur

comment image

Spur

Is Palmer also a ginger?

WCS

Daywalker

Sill Bimmons

Ginger programme-related activities.

blaxabbath

Salute to Service Month + Cardinals = Pat Tillman.

When is Salute to the the Cover Up of Tillman’s Fratricide?

Sharkbait

That’s taken the form of the NFL’s care for concussions.

Redshirt

Alright. Time to see if the Bengals offensive is going to lay another egg.

Don T

“Although no one was ever charged with the theft of the copyrighted clip art, the online fraternity was warned that further misbehavior would result in serious disciplinary action.”
Everytime I hear “University of Phoenix Stadium”
http://www.theonion.com/article/online-university-cracks-down-on-rowdy-online-frat-1214

Romonobyl

JJ Watt could probably roll it back a notch.

WCS

YOU DON’T #GETIT HE’S A #WARRIOR IT’S ABOUT #HARDWORK #NOOFFDAYS #RISEANDGRIND HE DOES IT THE #RIGHTWAY

Sill Bimmons

#LUNCHPAIL #BELTSANDER #TUNNELBORER

Romonobyl

Whoever invented the hashtag needs to die in a chemical fire.

Sill Bimmons

#DIEINAFIRE

blaxabbath

He knows it’s #AboutPrideNotPrejudice

Sill Bimmons

Fucking idiot.

blaxabbath

I swear, Fitz has more tackles than any other WR. Dude has been having balls forced to him for a decade.

Lothar of the Hill People

That’s what they’ll be saying about Aaron Hernandez in 9 more years.