NE @ Den: Both of these teams need to die in a fire. That is all. Enjoy the game!
Your Sunday Night “What Might Have Been” Open Thread
NE @ Den: Both of these teams need to die in a fire. That is all. Enjoy the game!
yes, touchdown new engl…. (throws up)
WELP
I used to laugh when big tough football players missed games because their big toe hurt. Then I hurt mine. Holy fuck is that painful.
You don;t know how much you use it until you can’t.
/had surgery on each
Turf toe is the shittiest sports injury I’ve ever had to deal with.
This includes broken bones and lacerations which required stitches.
That shit hurts.
Turf toe ain’t funny, especially if it’s caused by gout.
I’m an ass, so I frequently argue points of view that I don’t actually believe. As such, I’ve found that ingrown toenails are a surprisingly effective argument against evolution.
OWAH SNOW IS COLDAH THAN THEYAH SNOW!
Aww fuck. Well, I have an early morning class to teach, so there’s no point in watching any more of this soon-to-bee shitshow.
That just happened. Why did I wake up from my NFC East induced alcoholic stupor again?
Because you’re a masochist?
Apparently. It explains a lot.
SIGH. THe slow release.
YES! I mean…
hurray. patriot ball.
I really don;t want to drive up there and murder you, but I haven;t ruled it out.
i’m not happy about this either.
Well, at least I started the Pats’ D.
oh goddamnit
Every time that stupid commercial comes up, I think of this…
Is that a praying mantis killing a hummingbird? Because it looks like a praying mantis killing a hummingbird.
That’s Russell Wilson’s humming bird getting eaten by a praying mantis.
New Game: cast a sitcom actor in an uncharacteristic serious dramatic role
Ray Romano as Hitler during his last days in the bunker.
Brad Garrett as Goerring?
George Wendt as Himmler?
Shit boys, I think we got us a show.
Ted Danson as Rommel?
Ted Danson as Sheriff Lassen in ‘Fargo’
Oh and it works.
Bronson Pinchot as Vladimir Putin
Robert Reed as Dick Nixon
Kevin James as Pol Pot.
Christina Applegate as Margaret Thatcher, shitty accent and all.
Terrence Howard as a transgender rapper, raising two white orpahans.
Jim Parsons as Snake Plissken
Talib meant to poke the guy in the helmet on that play.
HAIL BLEERGH!
I noticed Collinsworth has gotten very good at relaxing his throat muscles when he talks about Brady.
Jesus…all these home videos on the net of Gronk as a kid features him taking a blow to the head…
DOWN GOES FRAZIER!! DOWN GOES FRAZIER!!!
I’m assuming his dipshit parents named that kid Frazier.
Things I could be doing instead of watching the NFL this season:
1. Improving relations with my family.
2. Learning how to lumberjack.
3. Starting a Night Ranger tribute band.
4. Drilling holes in my head.
5. Working on my one man tribute to Bob Hale.
I like no. 5 myself. How you doing brother.
There he is! Great way to end the weekend, I’m doing well, brother.
Surprised…I kind of expected a manifesto to be ranked somewhere in there.
A torn patellar tendon sounds really painful.
It is. Walking down a slope is particularly awful.
I got Gronk this for Christmas:
http://41.media.tumblr.com/54daeaf22c3c9a9bd45858b59bdcb530/tumblr_nu6ea73GhY1rkskbao1_500.jpg
GRONK WANT 40 POUND BAG OF HAPPY WHITE POWDER
I’m going to see Michael Bay’s Bengahzi movie just for the part where he has a Transformer sit down and explain that it was all Hilary’s fault.
Honestly the Grey Cup is more entertaining than this game.
If it wasn’t for the cool snow, think I would turn it off already. Fucking bullshit.
Needs more awesome snow.
The snow is the only reason I’m not watching Walking Dead right now.
Flag. Because I fucking can.
“You can see what Josh McDaniels plan is here”
Well, yeah, it’s the same as it is every week: Whatever Tom Brady calls.
Don;t forget the rank smugness and unearned sense of entitlement!
Jim from the Office plays soldier.
Wait is the guy from the office in a movie about Benghazi, holy fuck Hollywood.
I can see the 24 hour breakfast sandwiches but what kind of freak orders McDonald’s pancakes after breakfast? Or during breakfast for that matter?
The Gronk Family’s home videos…
http://media1.giphy.com/media/FQgc1FBNQlDBS/giphy.gif
Chapter 4 of “Parenting Tips From Buddy Ryan”
McDonald’s All Day Breakfast: So you won’t notice how shitty our burgers taste
Coors…cause it ain’t ice cold…you are gonna notice the taste…
So rubbing your chest is a signal to be an eligible receiver? When Andy Reid does that it means the bypass didn’t take.
When Andy Reid does that it means more ribs.
http://www.gifbin.com/bin/122010/1291751719_kid-drinking-water-from-hose-fail.gif
Seriously Gronk is the only receiver they have and you don’t have eight guys on him?
So the signal for making yourself an eligible receiver is to fondle your chest. So football is kind of like porn.
Always practice nipple discipline.
Good call:
http://41.media.tumblr.com/b832acb5a95fd3a15a8cf49ded724c30/tumblr_ntw9z4dMMt1rkskbao1_500.jpg
Is she 18? It’s very important.
According to the website yes, whoever is moderating can edit it out if uncomfortable with it.
None of these things apply to my question.
Nipple Discipline was the name of my band in junior college.
Nice of Brady to correct the refs on that call.
OH FUCK THE PATRIOTS!!!!
Seriously…how the fuck do they get away with that when it gets called as a penalty against other teams?!?
Because Bob Kraft is chums with Goodell, who has gone out of his way to nullify defenses to inflate the passing game.
“We are very sorry, New England. Forgive us?”
Of course.
Oh, Hai refs.
Frag on Patriots? Goddell’s getting a sternly-worded threatening letter tomorrow.
That was NAWT Tawmmy Terrific as a turkey. Jizzele has staff to handle such tedious parental duties.
Shit, my kids are the same age as Tom Brady’s, just opposite genders. I wonder if I might end up with Brady as my in-law?
Flag for breathing on Tom
Tom…your kids are going to grow up to be smack heads…
More of that.
Ohhhh boy. Fire up the furry fanfics.
It’s not The Wiz without Nipsey Russell.
What kind of shit is this?
More and more, it’s looking like this new Star Wars movie is JJ Abrams’ memo to George Lucas titled “How Not to Fuck Up a Franchise and Shit on People’s Childhoods”
Dear god I hate the juggernaut that is Star Wars…why the fuck are they even bothering with advertising? The neckbeards are going to show up for that crap no matter what.