Your NFC North “Race To The Middle” Open Thread

On a super lousy  shitty type day there was some quality distractification going on in last night’s open thread. My thanks to all those who took part. It was badly needed. Hey!-speaking of distractification…

GB @ Det: Here be two teams struggling in their own respective ways to get to 8-8. Neither will get there. Rodgers has done the gentle call-out to his receivers, saying “We’re not on the same page”. Apparently the Packers WR’s are on page 634 of Infinite Jest and Aaron is perusing GQ “for the articles!”. Over the last three games QB Stafford has been playing like a guy that was drafted really high and is expected to lift an entire franchise out of the doldrums. His new “No more gravyshakes/whipped chocolate pizza/slaughterhouse tasting menu/raw dough and Miracle Whip smoothie/post-game athletic cup tequila shooters” diet is starting to pay dividends! If only we fans of the game were capable of such discipline… The new OC The Jim Bob has worked wonders with the rushing game. Did you know that since he grabbed the reins the Lions have averaged 18 more yards per game in that category? I hope you were sitting down when I socked you with that knowledge. Who’d a thunk that was the difference between stinking and winning? Statisticians at ESPN, that’s who.

 

 

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Senor Weaselo

Wow, an NFL coach going for it on 4th down?

Doktor Zymm

I’m a fan of what I hear them playing at Ford Field.

Sharkbait

HAIL BLEERGH!

...
entropy

BEERGH FINDS YOUR OFFERING ACCEPTABLE AND BESTOWS UPON YOU FIVE YARDS OF BLESSING.

King Hippo

How long ya figure since Mike McCarthy has actually seen his wee-wee?

WCS

circa 1988

The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem

Mirrors are illegal in GB, so….

A while

Recovery Whiskey

lions are remembering who they are

Dunstan

Are they who were thought they were? And if so, should we crown their ass?

WCS

Sill Bimmons

Still can’t log on with anything but my phone?

Darkest Timeline Zack Morris

Hey man, I just got back from the movies (I know, bad overolrd) and I’m sorry I couldn’t be here to help. Have you tried clearing your history/cache on your ipad?

The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem

What did you see?

Darkest Timeline Zack Morris

The Night Before. Pretty good!

Doktor Zymm

GO FELINE SORTS

entropy

BEAT THE SHIPPING PREPARATION EMPLOYEES

JustStopDude

OH SHIT!!!! PYSCHONAUTS 2 WAS ANNOUNCED!!!!!

Fucking loved that game. No bullshit, stuck in the middle east, that game got me through some rough times…

Doktor Zymm

That was a fantastic game. Looking forward to 2.

Sill Bimmons

YOUR ALL BANANA EATING HIPPO LOVERS

King Hippo

no ofense?

Shogun Marcus

Hey! That’s my team. But you’re right.

Shogun Marcus

Yup.

Recovery Whiskey

Demolished Rodgers

Sharkbait

The NFL shop 2 team family commercials is like looking into the future. A Giants fan and a Pats fan coexisting seems like it shouldnt work.

entropy

Do we really need an NFL Roots segment on fucking kickers?!

King Hippo

I DO think we need another fucking barefoot kicker. I mean, have we had one since Rich Karlis?

entropy

That would be fun, agreed. But I don’t want to hear about Justin Tucker worshipping Adam Vinateri during a Lions/Packers shit show. Even I only have so much hate.

entropy

In January we will have what looks like an awful comedy called “Angel from Hell,” and a terrible adaptation of Lucifer on Fox. I think we’re good on angel TV shows for a decade or so after they get canceled in February.

Senor Weaselo

Does Supernatural count?

entropy

Not really. Cas has been demoted to comedic relief.

Shogun Marcus

I wish you were wrong. Constantine had hope, but nbc gonna nbc. Lucifer has so much going for it that it will plummet much like its main character.

entropy

You cannot tell the Lucifer story without the Season of Mists Sandman story; and they probably will make Mazikeen just some ditzy actress wannabe instead of a badass demon. Constantine could have been great (and they tried, I’ll give them that, even if they made Chas an awful character), but you know some executive asshole stepped in there.

Shogun Marcus

If it was netflix or hbo, then maybe. Season of Mists IS a season all on its own.

entropy

We should have an Otto Man of the Year award, just so we have something to nominate each other for.

WCS

He’ll be back after his race for President under his pseudonym “Ted Cruz” is over.

Doktor Zymm

I’ve injured my ankle loads of times. The worst ankle injury I ever had? It was on my good, never injured before ankle, and it was from tripping over a cat.

King Hippo

Silver lining – just think how happy you made that cat!

Doktor Zymm

You don’t know how right you are. She wasn’t allowed in my bedroom, I tripped over her sneaking into my bedroom. She sat on my bed in comfort and surveyed me writhing in pain because I horribly injured myself rather than step on her.

King Hippo

Sitting there like Walter White “I won”

WCS

Tripping over a cat is probably how I’ll split my head open. Then they’ll feast on the innards.

litre_cola

In Alaska that is called not wasting a game animal.

King Hippo

Which is probably pretty close to how cats view us.

Recovery Whiskey

Detroit you had one job

Shogun Marcus

Make inferior domestic cars?

WCS

Senor Weaselo

New poll: Commentist most likely to look like and/or be Senor Cardgage?

Shogun Marcus

THIS PACKERS TEAM I CALL THEM ROMANS BECAUSE THEY ARE KILLING SOME LIONS TONIGHT.

Sill Bimmons

I hate my gear.

Sill Bimmons

Everything is broken.

WCS

Crown Royal Black – not bad! Piss off, rye allergy. You won’t stop my intoxication.
http://images.complex.com/complex/image/upload/t_article_image/igdkjt28egq9ww6xob0w.jpg

King Hippo

Return to Jim Caldwell Classic

...

Every time the Lions fuck away a game, I think of poor ZODIAC MOTHERFUCKER.

Senor Weaselo
Sharkbait

http://49.media.tumblr.com/d7e15e76dbd260c68ea1d46625b5a733/tumblr_msbr8elkWs1rc0yuao1_250.gif

Every time the Lions choke away a game, an angel gets its wing!

Sill Bimmons

All my connections are belong to you.

ssi_bulldawg

Act like you’ve been….oh, never mind.

Senor Weaselo

Is it happening?

Sill Bimmons

Huh.

Doktor Zymm

Which Adams was that? Quincy?

Beastmode Ate My Baby

Wednesday.

entropy

Rodgers: “32 and a half sacks? I call that a slow Tuesday.”

Buddy Cole's Halftime Show

I don’t know how to embed YT videos but this B&B kills me everytime.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0O33ld6Dl3k

King Hippo

God has a 2nd middle finger, it would seem…

Senor Weaselo

It means “peace between worlds.”

http://i.imgur.com/SIE03Un.gif

...

Sexy time?

Sharkbait

Lions gonna Lion.

WCS

Don’t ask me for lottery numbers. I’m keep them for myself.

King Hippo

saved me some typin’

litre_cola

ITS HAPPENING

ssi_bulldawg

The derp is upon us!

JustStopDude

comment image

litre_cola

I honestly could crush hash browns at any time of day, but hot cakes seem to be a bit of a stretch.

WCS

Buddy Cole's Halftime Show

I laugh like an idiot everytime I watch this one.

King Hippo

I saw Friday in a movie theater where my platonic friend Kasia and I were the only honkies there. They played this music video before the movie. There was singing and dancing. It was glorious.

Buddy Cole's Halftime Show

THIS LIONS TEAM I CALL THEM JAMES DEEN BECAUSE THIS HAS BEEN A SHIT DAY FOR THEIR FANS

Sharkbait

Ugh. The fiance is playing Cobb. It’s win and in between myself and her. Fuck you starks.

ssi_bulldawg

That should not count as a touchdown for anyone. As in, not in real life. Not in fantasy. Not in Narnia. No where.

Senor Weaselo

Well in the Narnia Football League the Lions always win.

Sharkbait

Its Lions-Browns in the super Bowl every year.

Senor Weaselo

69 minutes? Nice.

King Hippo

FUCK YOU LIONS!!!!

ssi_bulldawg

Does Starks get a TD pass on that?

Senor Weaselo

DERPDOWN

Doktor Zymm

That’s a stupid TD

WCS

The Lions are sooooooooooo boned.

ThursdaySkyGoddess

The prophet speaks!

Recovery Whiskey

FUMBLEDOWN

ssi_bulldawg

Womp womp