Your NFC North “Race To The Middle” Open Thread

On a super lousy  shitty type day there was some quality distractification going on in last night’s open thread. My thanks to all those who took part. It was badly needed. Hey!-speaking of distractification…

GB @ Det: Here be two teams struggling in their own respective ways to get to 8-8. Neither will get there. Rodgers has done the gentle call-out to his receivers, saying “We’re not on the same page”. Apparently the Packers WR’s are on page 634 of Infinite Jest and Aaron is perusing GQ “for the articles!”. Over the last three games QB Stafford has been playing like a guy that was drafted really high and is expected to lift an entire franchise out of the doldrums. His new “No more gravyshakes/whipped chocolate pizza/slaughterhouse tasting menu/raw dough and Miracle Whip smoothie/post-game athletic cup tequila shooters” diet is starting to pay dividends! If only we fans of the game were capable of such discipline… The new OC The Jim Bob has worked wonders with the rushing game. Did you know that since he grabbed the reins the Lions have averaged 18 more yards per game in that category? I hope you were sitting down when I socked you with that knowledge. Who’d a thunk that was the difference between stinking and winning? Statisticians at ESPN, that’s who.

 

 

0 0 votes
Article Rating
Subscribe
Notify of
846 Comments
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
Brick Meathook

Browns and Lions fans really need to form a support group. I mean, shit, that’s fucked up.

I live in Los Angeles where we still *thankfully* don’t have a pro football team. (not counting USC, of course)

Shogun Marcus

So how many players families die by martha Ford’s order in front of them?

entropy

At least four people catch a bullet in their bubblegoose.

Beerguyrob

First the Jewish ones.

Don T

Had to go on Twitter for a replay. Damn; getting blown out would’ve been much, much better.

Sep

I finally got home late enough to finish a TNF game and I am gifted this…

GOOD LORD I SHOULD WORK LATE MORE OFTEN

King Hippo

Hey, I did make up a game on sunrise as a result of that play in the DFO contest!

sunrisesunrise

That was ridiculous. I am glad I didn’t have cable to see that live.

Darkest Timeline Zack Morris

I love that Richard Rogers just shows up in front like he’s photobombing the play.

WCS

comment image

WCS
ssi_bulldawg

Too late. It fucking happened

Sep

Gratuitous Simpsons References league

Senor Weaselo

Your ideas intrigue me and I wish to subscribe to your newsletter.

ssi_bulldawg

That was a fucking bomb.

Don T

Even in Gamecast arrows that looked crushing. Godammit.

Darkest Timeline Zack Morris

Rodgers gets weak facial, delivers big blow

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Clearly Olivia’s fault

Horatio Cornblower

“I got facemasked there.”

No, his thumb grazed your facemask and you turtled and got a call. Congratulations. Fuck off.

entropy

He has been taking acting lessons from Olivia Minn, apparently.

LeighAnne

That may be the most Lions thing ever.

WCS

Three days after Peak Factory. Unpossible.

Beerguyrob

That was not very cromulent.

King Hippo

If something can top that, not sure I want to see it.

Senor Weaselo

I’ll try my best, but I’ll need a good party, several ladies, and copious amounts of alcohol.

Horatio Cornblower

I think we saw it when the Seahawks did the same thing to the Packers; that one was worse because it was such a bad call.

Brick Meathook

DETROIT VS CLEVELAND: WHO IS SADDER?

...

It is a tie.

Beerguyrob

C’MON METEOR!

The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem

Trick question- neither one is capable of winning

Shogun Marcus

Holy. Mother. Fuck.

bourb0nblues

You gotta head out of that stadium tonight… and you’re still in Detroit.
Let that sink in.

Doktor Zymm

Things Green Bay can suck :

Senor Weaselo

Aaron Rodgers is listening.

King Hippo

Holy shit, that was really awful goddamned defense.

Sharkbait

Who has 2 thumbs and started Richard Rodgers tonight?

THIS GUY!

Darkest Timeline Zack Morris

Me too! My Gronk replacement!

Sill Bimmons

huhdafuq

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Call Cleveland, there’s some competition for sadness production

ssi_bulldawg

Only so much output. When demand for sadness rises, you must open new factories.

...

Oh, Cleveland is Detroit,

Doktor Zymm

Touchdown Seahawks.

ssi_bulldawg

You’ve been Caldwell’ed! Meow

WCS
Senor Weaselo

Cleveland: At least we’re not Detroit!

We’re not Detroit!

bourb0nblues

Spread covered!!!!

Senor Weaselo

Woo!

Horatio Cornblower

You know what that play really needs?

A flag for illegal formation.

The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem

CONDITION: PEAK DETROIT

makeitsnowondem

HOLY FUCKING SHITBALLS

BrettFavresColonoscopy

bhahahahahahahahahah

I COVERED!

Fuck you Detroit.

King Hippo

OH MY FUCKING GOD

Darkest Timeline Zack Morris

WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAATTTTTTT

Doktor Zymm

Shiiiiiiiiit.

Sharkbait

Oh Lions.

ssi_bulldawg

Wowowoeowowowozjdbskdjjf

The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem

And Detroit is going for a Cleveland Special

Dunstan

Industrial espionage!

Sill Bimmons

Tonight sucked.

entropy

Yeah, I suddenly got exiled to PhoneLand, too

WCS

Sweet Jebus, Loins.

Col. Duke LaCross

Oh holy shit.

makeitsnowondem

DEFCON LIONS

ssi_bulldawg

Haha! Fraggggggggg

Horatio Cornblower

‘That was a great no call’

Blow it out your ass Mike, that’s classic pass interference.

The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem

BEERGH is displeased….

makeitsnowondem

I know it’s the end of the game and all, but how do you not throw that flag?

Doktor Zymm

Dix blocking your Cobb? Call 2-800-HAHA

King Hippo

uhhhh, there will be no FG attempt

Doktor Zymm

ROAR. OR whatever sound lions actually make.

The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem

PHEEL was high on bath salts.

Horatio Cornblower

Was?