Your Monday Night Open Thread

NYG @ Mia: Having lost 4 of their last 5 the Giants are sending notice to the rest of the NFC East that as far as the championship of the division is concerned, they’re in this for the long run. The Fins are responding with, “Playoffs?, Playoffs?” Literally dozens of fantasy wins are on the line tonight. Shall we watch? Yes we shall…

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makeitsnowondem

Gentlemen.

Sill Bimmons

Tusked Gopher.

King Hippo

Perfect for the throwback endzones:

King Hippo

Dolphins don;t know the rules again. Lothar ain’t gon be happy.

Lothar of the Hill People

Don’t tell me someone fucked up the punt return.

Sharkbait

Aren’t we overdue for a backbreaking Manningception?

Sill Bimmons
Romonobyl

Where I grew up we called that a black cow.

Sill Bimmons

You called a root beer float a “black cow?”

Romonobyl

Yep…midwestern thing I guess.

Shogun Marcus

Isn’t a black cow with Coke?

Lothar of the Hill People

Yep. Root beer float is a root beer float. Black cow is a “coke float.”

Sill Bimmons

It makes descriptive sense.

King Hippo

NO OFENCE

Sharkbait

How many times will Fanny overthrow his receivers?

WCS

All of them.

Sill Bimmons

Landry is this week’s NOBYL Prize Winner!

King Hippo

He’s quite derpy! The people never really embraced the award, though.

Sill Bimmons

“The people” will like what I tell them to like.

King Hippo

Tame Impala is a good band.

Shogun Marcus

Have you heard about these wars in the stars? Do we have any trade interests there?

Sill Bimmons

I hear that the Trade Federation’s a bunch of pricks.

King Hippo

apparently there are intergalactic taxation disputes that make FASCINATING plotlines for prequel films

Sill Bimmons

I had also heard that.

Romonobyl

NO BLOOD FOR QUASARS!

Shogun Marcus

There Will Be Clones

King Hippo

Is this the MNF we finally get the bonus drinking period?

Sharkbait

Bleergh willing.

King Hippo

Blessed be He

Shogun Marcus

Capricious and Arbitrary be He,
Touchdown Seahawks,
15 yards, Amen

Sill Bimmons

Orange Crushed.

WCS

PK is AMAZED that the Giants haven’t played in Miami since the mid-90s. WEIRD

Sill Bimmons

MAYBE

Sill Bimmons

Point Break remake: Dumb movie or the dumbest movie?

Sharkbait

Yes.

Romonobyl

Dumb, but not quite Speed 2 dumb.

King Hippo

Why would you not let the shitdicks kick a FG if they want?

Sill Bimmons

STICKY RICKY BACK IN TOWN????

The Maestro

The year he was in the CFL was hilarious and amazing all at the same time.

ArmedandHammered

I wonder if Coughlin’s Life Alert went off when he fell down?

King Hippo

I’VE FALLEN AND I CAN’T GET UP!

Romonobyl

#GERIATRICCOACHSLIVESMATTER!

King Hippo

DRC, takin’ out the old man

Romonobyl

Oh how cute, they’re still playing football even after last weekend’s goat-rope. Can’t imagine why though…

Sharkbait

Odell, on your dance. Your footwork was great, but it the lack of stabbing will cost you. 6/10.

Sharkbait

Might wanna cover that OBJ guy, He’s good at football.

King Hippo

who would have expected a deep ball to THAT guy?

Recovery Whiskey

That is some derptastic defense Miami

The Maestro

ODB GONE

Sill Bimmons

hoo boy

Recovery Whiskey

The Miami Santa Machine

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I feel like Philip Rivers is taking that “Football is Family” motto a bit too seriously.

Sill Bimmons

Welp, I’ll never go to a BWW again.

No WAY can I deal with Pepsi products.

Recovery Whiskey

JPP needs some kind of robotic claw

The Maestro

And a cat. And a nemesis with the surname “Gadget”.

Sill Bimmons

Constable Gadget, perhaps?

The Maestro

Close enough!

Sill Bimmons

/nods sagely

Sill Bimmons

STICKY RICKY BACK IN TOWN???

Sill Bimmons

reply fail

King Hippo

Didya say Gidget?

Sill Bimmons
Sharkbait

As cliche of a food item as it’s become, bacon. It’s much more versatile as a food.

The Maestro

The answer, of course, is “all.”

Sill Bimmons

Anyone else wondering just where the fuck Fargo takes it from here?

King Hippo

NO SPOILERS!

Chairman Goodell said we should watch that in the morning.

Recovery Whiskey

She needs something for her show hole

jjfozz

I got into a show hole once, maxed my credit card getting out of it

Sharkbait

The Edmonton Oilers have won 6 in a row. Is Armageddon upon us?

The Maestro

Yes. And the fact they’ve done it without McDavid and a functioning D corps is a travesty in and of itself too.

Sharkbait

Are they….good?

Recovery Whiskey

Brown showing that free agent form he had his final year in Seattle

Sill Bimmons

Say, that’s a pretty girl out there!

I wonder if she dates one of the Jankees?

Col. Duke LaCross

“He should be ejected.”
~Jon Gruden

“I don’t like these penalties.”
~Jon Gruden eleven seconds later

King Hippo

so wait, they challenged a fumble they didn’t even goddamn recover?

jjfozz

“While I find the argyle pattern in the endzone to be traditional and hearkening back to the days when things were more genteel and dignified, I must say that the color combination is most brazen, and therefore, suited more to those of a, ahem, Mediterranean or Caribbean lineage.”

– Jason Garrett speaking to Fluffy, Muffy, and Buffy as he sips a most challenging merlot.

Sill Bimmons

Where were Mopsy, Flopsy and Cottontail?

JustStopDude

For Eli, pronouncing “Merlot” correctly is challenging.

Horatio Cornblower

Beckham has 69 yards receiving for my FF team.

Nice.

The Maestro

Gronk approves with an eyebrow waggle.

The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem

So…is this game the slap-fight it looks like on paper

King Hippo

EVEN SLAPPIER

packman_jon

I assume we all love Miami’s throwback unis?

The Maestro

Fuck yeah. They look awesome. Re-doing them was a travesty only slightly smaller than the Browns’ new ones are.

jjfozz

Odell’s beard looks about as comfortable as taking a sauna with Suh and Siragusa

King Hippo

After further review, the receiver is not Dez Bryant. TD!

Shogun Marcus

Finally something the catch committee can agree on!
Not Dez = Catch

Sill Bimmons

I hear this guy Beckham is good at catching footballs?

Is that right?

Horatio Cornblower

Meh

jjfozz

Today in the office, two guys sitting in different cubicles on the same conference call – both using their speakerphones.

God I hate people.

Redshirt

I’ve been paged to call my boss, leave my cubicle to go the 15 feet to his office, only to be questioned why I didn’t call them.

packman_jon

I’m so thankful all my coworkers have headphones

Spanky Datass

WHUT IZ ER KATCHE??!!1?

Col. Duke LaCross

Pylon-cam actually useful?

Redshirt

That’s a touchdown.

Sill Bimmons

Sausage or meatballs?

http://i.imgur.com/oCtI8xj.jpg

Sharkbait

Are the meatballs home made?

/may have made some last week.

The Maestro

I had homemade Moroccan-style lamb meatballs last week at my mom’s. It was just heavenly.

Sharkbait

Moroccan style lamb meatballs?
You had my curiosity, but now you have my attention.

Sill Bimmons
Sharkbait

Yeah…gonna have to make those.

Sharkbait

Ill bet. Yogurt based sauces and spices ftw.

BTW this is a decent DIY Tikka Masala:
http://www.thekitchn.com/recipe-chicken-tikka-masala-recipes-from-the-kitchn-195785

jjfozz

Tonight we learn that big people hate humidity.

The Maestro

With the reservoirs running low in California, more and more people are turning to GUNT SWEAT in order to stay alive!

JustStopDude

http://gifrific.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/04/Charles-Barkley-Falling-Asleep-Inside-the-NBA.gif

I got to call it a night folks…got to get up early as fuck to the airport to pick up a car…then pick up my boss…and then drive to another state.

I’m thinking about keeping creepy religious am talk radio going the entire time…

Sill Bimmons

Do the creepy religious radio thing.

No way you can possibly fall asleep listening to that.

JustStopDude

I was thinking it more of a way of making my boss uncomfortable so that he never talks to me again.

Sill Bimmons

It can do both!

Sharkbait

Has he heard of our Lord and Savior Bleergh?

Shogun Marcus

That would be awesome. Knock on the door, “Have you heard the news of our savior Bleergh the Capricious and Arbitrary?”
Uhh…no?
/throw flag in their face and yell
15 YARDS, TOUCHDOWN SEAHAWKS!
then peel off.