Your First Of Many (Two?) Saturday Night NFL Games Open Thread

No see, it’s Thursday Night Football disguised as Other Night Football. It’s more special that way. Do you feel the specialness that’s being imposed upon you by the heads that are talking? No? I knew that you’re the sort of commentariat that wouldn’t fall for that sort of thing.

NYJ @ Dal: Here’s a sentence you don’t see very often, The Jets are clearly the better team in this game. Whoa. I don’t know what you did/are doing Todd Bowles but I do know there will be hell to pay in the next life. The record for TD’s in a season for Jets QB’s is 29-the Fitz is at 25. He’s washed almost all the Buffalo off him and is looking fine. He’s got to be the poster boy for the “that system just wasn’t right for him” Narrative. Either that or this season is a one-off and Houston doesn’t really deserve the 6th round pick that they’re getting for dumping him. This is hard to type-INJURED TONY ROMO IS THE LEAGUE MVP! The Cowboys have fallen from 7th in yds. per game to 29th. As far as points per game are concerned they’ve gone from 29.2 down to 17.7. Enjoy the game folks.

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jjfozz

And Davis’s vertebrate quickly go into orbit around the earth. goddamn that was brutal

ballsofsteelandfury

That was a beautiful hit.

entropy

It was a nice hit, although I was waiting for a flag for some stupid reason.

ballsofsteelandfury

Because Goodell has destroyed our beautiful game.

jjfozz

The demons who occupy the first circle of hell could be playing the Cowboys, with the very fabric of reality itself at stake, and life as we know it could hang in the balance – and I’d be wearing a fucking Demons jersey #666, becuase FUCK THE COWBOYS

Buddy Cole's Halftime Show

But the Patriots played them already this year.

Smithchez

Always up the middle on first down. Forever. Kill me.

ballsofsteelandfury

Tracy still scares me.

Smithchez

A run up the middle on first down? Looks like Chan is changing things up!

entropy

Sticking with what doesn’t work.

Horatio Cornblower

Just took off to watch the Cerrone MMA fight, figured I’d miss 20 minutes or so of this game.

But I’m back now and, I assume, sometime in the next five to ten minutes Cerrone’s ribs will just fall right out of his body.

entropy

Th only thing Cromartie was halfway decent at was returning kicks, and now he’s even terrible at that.

Bortleback

He used to be pretty good at reminding the team that they desperately needed to get Revis back

jjfozz

Been drinking at kid’s bday party since 5 – want to keep the flame alive – have to be at inlaws tomorrow at 930 for gift opening with kids.

So, what do I do? Keep drinking, get real shitfaced and open presents with the room spinning – OR be a responsible adult?

Wait, fuck it. I know how this one ends.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

What a cunning array of stunts!

Sill Bimmons

Indeed.

ballsofsteelandfury

This is the only way I can think of to make this game better :
comment image

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

HEY PETER REMEMBER WHEN YOUR DATE TINKERBELL DISAPPEARED FOR HALF AN HOUR DURING THE PROM? THAT’S CAUSE I HAD HER BENT OVER A RAILING IN THE AUDITORIUM YOU LITTLE SHIT HOW DO YOU LIKE THEM APPLES?

Bugg

Are those 2 NFL referees there?

Spanky Datass

Yes. BEWBS!

God I fucking hate the Jets special teams.

litre_cola

I read that as Jets special needs.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Potato, po-tah-to.

Bugg

The whole”The refs are gonna get better’ thing. Forget about that. WHAT THE FUCK?

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Horatio Cornblower

My opponent in the FF play-offs started Bullock.

This night pleases me.

/gets fucking buried tomorrow

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Bullocks!

blordinaryfagicmox
entropy

I’m about ready to murder someone. Think I can get to Chan before the second half starts?

Buddy Cole's Halftime Show

WU-TANG CHAN AIN’T NOTHIN’ TA FUCK WIT

Bugg

Chan thinks this scoring TDs thing is overrated.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Anyone’s doubts about whether the authentic Jets were playing tonight should be put to bed with that.

Sill Bimmons

HE’S GOT THE SCOBEES TAKE HIM OUT BACK AND SHOOT HIM

King Hippo

Use the elephant gun.

Because he’s fat, you see.

Smithchez

This is the loljetsiest game in some time.

Fuck our kickers

entropy

Show a little more joy at the missed FG, Jim, you fuck

King Hippo

SO VERY THURSDAY

SO VERY JETS

ballsofsteelandfury

That’s So Jets

Gratliff

loooooooooooooool

Sill Bimmons

loljest

Smithchez

How has the Jets special teams coordinator not been fired yet?

Smithchez

Is the Dallas defensive line really this good or is the Jets offensive line just awful tonight?

entropy

Jets O line is AWFUL tonight, but Dallas has a decent pass rush.

ballsofsteelandfury

That’s probably the one thing they have going for them.

Bortleback

Greg Hardy gets a new gun for every QB pressure he gets

entropy

I don’t know about that one. Didn’t look like PI to me. If anything, Marshall got away with one there.

Smithchez

The bullshit PI penalty! Taking a play out of New England’s book.

Sill Bimmons

UNCATCHABLE BALL WTF

Sill Bimmons

Oh fuck fuck FUCK Pheel and Jeem tomorrow.

Going to see if I can sync up the DVE radio broadcast.

I can’t do this two days in a row.

ballsofsteelandfury

Follow Don T’s advice. I’m loving it tonight.

Buddy Cole's Halftime Show

Yessir.

Buddy Cole's Halftime Show

No wait it some dude who ended in -sky I think.

Buddy Cole's Halftime Show

Jared Zabransky!

Took a while, but I got it.

entropy

The fucking penalty rules states the tackler’s hand has to be inside the collar…. A pull on the sleeve of the jersey is not the collar. For fuck’s sake.

Buddy Cole's Halftime Show

Well then, the NFL and Buddy’s bar have different rules.

Horatio Cornblower

I don’t know; are we sure that Bryant “caught” caught the ball? Seems worth a challenge to me.

Sill Bimmons

Maybe even “Geoff Scotland” to throw you further off the trail.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Nice field vision there by Kellen “Hellar” Moore.

Smithchez

Make sure to both force him to throw quickly AND give Dez Bryant a 10 yard cushion. Ironclad strategy.

ballsofsteelandfury

Tove Lo’s “stay high” seems appropriate for this game.

King Hippo

Kellen Moore, Super Bowl L MVP

Sill Bimmons

Getting it to Dez: good idea.

entropy

Oh you assholes

Smithchez

God Antonio Cromartie sucks

Buddy Cole's Halftime Show

He never was good at the prevent defense.

entropy

That was some bullshit on that horse collar call

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

“Fucking Winters. God damnit.”

– Every Nazi in World War 2

Buddy Cole's Halftime Show

I think Jerry Jones is a closeted gay.

He’s been around more men in Lycra pants than Buddy at Toronto Pride!

ballsofsteelandfury

You may be onto something.

Smithchez

There you go, guys. Just herp and derp them into field goal range

Sill Bimmons

WOO GO POKES