csb/ When I was at university I would go back home for holidays, spring break and the summer and sling milk for my dad so that I could have spending money. Pere had the expectation that when I was finished schooling I would join him in the business. One morning during Xmas break I was on my way to make a delivery at a grocery store and the announcer on the radio said, “Congratulations folks, today [insert hometown] is the coldest place in Canada!” Shortly thereafter I decided that the cow liquid business was not for me…
Sea @ Min: TAKE THE UNDER! The Weather Network tells me that by game time it’ll be 1 degree but will feel like -11. This would be a good spot for Peyton because he’s accustomed to not having any feelings in his fingers. But this is the NFL and we can’t have nice things. Sigh. Pundits (that have completely forgotten that Minny has been a dome team for 32 of the last 34 years) think that this will give the Vikes an advantage. Coping with the weather? No. Given these D’s I wouldn’t think that this was going to be a high-scoring game under any circumstance. Seattle did blow the Vikes balls off in wk. 13 but the former was cracking on all 24 cylinders and the latter was missing a couple of safeties, LB Barr and DT Joseph. I give Minny a puncher’s chance here-they’ve got to win the turnover and special teams games. That said, I’m making Seahawks Tyler Lockett my game MVP. Now, START YOUR TYPING FINGERS!
v
http://i.imgur.com/2EOuaLF.gif
Is that the North Korean ICBM program?
Damn it, I had to jinx Zimmer.
GANG TACKLED
I need either AP to have 2 fumbles or Pete Carroll getting blown up by an overzealous safety.
I would really enjoy him taking a swing at a player and incurring a 15 yard penalty.
What kind of fantasy league are you in?
Seahawks going for the “cover none” defense so beloved of all the other non-playoff teams this year.
The wood frog can survive being frozen by raising its blood sugar to prevent the blood from crystallizing. Some people think that diabetes may be caused by a similar mechanism in humans that are poorly adapted to colder temperatures. Clearly, EVERYONE WILL HAVE DIABETES AFTER THIS GAME!!!
The Minnesota Wood Frogs was actually second in the original newpaper poll. People forget this.
http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/41-XTd93vdL._SY300_.jpg
Shouldn’t those be on the back of a huntin truck in Minnesota?
The Vikings aren’t even doing bad right now, but it is still painful to watch.
?w=628
I think Zimmer might know what the fuck he’s doing.
We’ve replaced Mike Zimmer’s head with an overripe tomato; let’s see if anyone notices.
I doubt Mike would.
In Ice football news, I am torn as Evander Kane is back in Winnipeg to play the Ice Bombers and it is tracksuit day at the game. My buddies are all dressed up in tracksuits bringing money phones with them. This is one of the times I wish I was back in that arctic wasteland. It will be glorious.
This is pretty awesome.
Thank you for not blocking!!!
“Jeremy Lane…KinderCare”
Pre-snap…looks like everybody chain smokin Marlboros
Old school football
Weather not a factor so far
Today’s drinking game:
Every time they mention the cold…stop drinking.
NAWT FAIR
You dick.
I respectfully return the ticket.
Mike Wallace signals first down, two yards short.
aaaand we’re off
Mike Wallace makes a catch? What what?!
Say whaaaaaat!?
As a Vikes fan, I don’t think the Vikes are gonna do great today BUT if I have one solace it’s that Russel Wilson’s “hot streak” was against Cleveland, Baltimore, and a Cardinal’s team that didn’t give the slightest fuck about winning. So… maybe I can have hope?
don’t
No shit? An outdoor stadium in a northern clime has coils in it? Wow.
Moon pie! What a time to be alive.
No opening kickoff return for touchdown or boneheaded penalty? I’m bored.
I know, right? Also no catastrophic injury to a key player!
Every time I see a fan in a Vikings Jared Allen jersey, I say, “Minnesota Nice.”
I’m just gonna apologize now for TheBuccaneerGrizzly and TheCorsairKoala.
WHOOOOOOOOOOOOO SEAHAWKS
I don’t think I can handle another joke, NBC.
I’ve put on my 1975 Alan Page throwback jersey, I’m heading out to make a beer run and I will be back to watch the game on the DVR because I hate commercials so fucking much.
See you all after the game.
SKOL VIKINGS.
http://40.media.tumblr.com/9a50e45d9c734d403d98eaf3856ea4d3/tumblr_nz1o4fVd3L1s2wio8o2_1280.jpg
Bud fucking Grant
61 and sunny in North Cakalaky. My living room windows are open. SUCK IT, COSTAS.
And then you realize we play Wake today, and you wish you would freeze to death.
I may just take a muscle relaxer and pass the fuck out instead.
The gf and I did a handful of distillery tours here in Derm yesterday, so I’m getting blasted before I watch Cat dribble into four defenders while the rest of those ass hats stand around.
hey guys
Yo.
I think this is a good morning for kombucha mimosas.
Those are nice. We’re Irish Coffee and bacon sliders here. Kind of a brunch side of things
Brunch is a genius meal invention.
Baileys and coffee here
I’m drinking my Jameson and beer kick-off combo. This will slide nicely into some Vodka and Iced Tea by halftime.
Is the booth feed cutting out intermittently for everyone? Wonder if that’s a cold effect.
I DIDNT DO IT!
/Has amazing self control
http://stream1.gifsoup.com/view5/3984540/techno-viking-o.gif
Teknoviking is ready!
Ice Station Zebra reference…..I was gonna wait till halftime to start drinking bit that does it.
“No, its not the Pro Bowl…”
I hope not, because if Honolulu is freezing, then we’re in the middle of a Ice Age and we’re all dead.”
Are sportscasters not allowed to wear ear warmers?
or fucking gloves??
It might not feel comfortable with their earpieces in.
However, a producer in Chicago got a ton of shit for telling his female reporters they couldn’t wear hats during outside live shots on supercold days.
what percentage vodka is Al Michaels today? Perhaps he will tell us how he REALLY feels about Obama?
How the hell are you fine people.
West coast means breakfast shots. GO HAWKS. SKOL VIKINGS.
Coldplay… see, it works on so many levels!
/hangs self
http://56.media.tumblr.com/edc686cf902fddfd885aaeb1d5997835/tumblr_na4w2oYBfP1r0jlbgo1_500.jpg
I believe that’s the level it works on the most.
First order of business this morning is to read your guys posts from the Pacman Big Ben debacle. I was slinginging drinks and dying that I couldn’t be in the chat last night.
I don’t know why, but Teddy Bridgewater’s season reminds me of Drew Brees’ 2003 season. It’s crazy, but hear me out:
Overrated expensive WR (David Boston/Mike Wallace)
Hall of Fame RB (LaDainian Tomlinson/Adrian Peterson)
Physically gifted draft bust at WR (Reche Caldwell/Cordarrelle Patterson)
Unknown Rookie Phenom (Antonio Gates/Stefon Diggs)
Offensive Line ravaged by injuries
Young Qb with average arm strength and mobility
(Checks the Likes button)
Get off the Internet, Teddy, and go play football!
“Its up another notch to -4°. At this rate, it will be at freezing by Spring.”
http://www.quickmeme.com/img/14/14e6731f9f27a479eb682108ae9aae762aab4aa20f7405e78ef9307ae9fb13fc.jpg
The only benefit of that joke is the rage I felt hearing it generated enough heat to keep me warm.
But what is it in Celsius?
-20°C
I just had to look this up as well.
I was worried Costas’ face or hair was going to crack in the cold
He’s wearing mittens instead of gloves….. not an ounce of testosterone in that guy.
“You’re going to die.”
http://45.media.tumblr.com/2d7a60cf2c68c270ee4471e219bed162/tumblr_nzd27hhLRP1uofr2ko9_r1_500.gif
ICEBOWL REFERENCE! BLEACH!!!
http://49.media.tumblr.com/4bfaa4d79ff4bc667e0657b1ebcb0a0a/tumblr_mjxhg8OFUc1ronhn5o1_400.gif
Get to spend the early part of the afternoon applying for federal aid for college.
Yay.
Everyone give me money so I don’t have to.
http://56.media.tumblr.com/2acf5ed690f52d2d62dc80173798e35e/tumblr_nylxuj8NVt1skkfpco1_500.jpg
That woman REALLY likes her back getting scratched.
Dear god I got to clean up my apartment…
After the dipshittery of the NFL yesterday, and before what we’re sure to see today, I propose a little reminder humanity can do good, even wonderful things. People’s exhibit A, the ultra-violet images from NASA’s STEREO-A, a satellite designed to stare at the sun, constantly. Here is one of the first images returned, back in July:
http://www.nasa.gov/sites/default/files/thumbnails/image/20150715_062759_n7eua_171.jpg
Counterpoint: The people who think NASA is a waste of money
And complain about it on the things we got thanks to the space program, like better computers, advanced software, and satellite-provided internet?
GOD DAMN IT NOW I HATE PEOPLE AGAIN THANKS BORTLE
And your reminder of how stupid people can really be when it comes to anything regarding space: https://twitter.com/TakeThatEarth
JUST START THE BUCKING GAME SO I CAN MOVE ON WITH MY LIFE!