GB @ Was: The weather in Washington, UK is 41 degrees but it feels like 34. However I don’t think that it’s going to be an issue for this game. It’s been quite some time since the Slurs hosted a playoff game. This’ll give you an idea:
-Bread was only .25 but you had to slice it yourself.
-Women holding mics on the sidelines were called ‘assistants to someone that matters’ or ‘wanton hussies’.
-The NFL called concussions ‘a figment of everyone’s fevered imaginations’.
-Dan Snyder was in grade school, mixing Lysol and tap water together, labeling it as ‘lemonade’ and selling it for a buck a glass to his classmates.
-speaking of school, Tom Coughlin was walking uphill thru 4 feet of snow to a one-room schoolhouse.
-bananas hadn’t been invented in a Monsanto hothouse yet.
Those were the days, huh? Contrary to what every Packers backer thinks/the expectation of the casual NFL fan/common sense/all that is good and right in the world, Wash has an enormous advantage at the QB spot. Over the last 10 games Rodgers has a 57% completion rate and a 16TD/6INT ratio. Over that same span Cousins’ passes have found their mark 72 percent of the time and his TD/INT ratio is a “am I reading this right?” 23-3! But wait! The Slurs didn’t win a single game against a team that was over .500. Also, of Cousins 11 picks, 7 came against the blitz. There is a team playing today that blitzed the 5th-most this year. I’ll give you a second or two to figure out which one it is. Hint-for this game only the Pack D has named themselves “The Cousins Fuckers”. Now that you’ve got every single relevant bit of data related to this game, well, start with the typing!
Giada slight nip slip, you’re welcome
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g7FI6_3ZU_8
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v74/Nickasinsaltlick/4ead075a43.gif
TOO LATE VINEGAR STROKES
Due to my deteriorating eyesight, I cannot read this.
Three minutes to kickoff, three minutes til “Breath” ends, then “River of Deceit” to start the game….. I can drunk-plan the shit out of a playlist!!!!
http://www.gifsoup.com/webroot/animatedgifs/132268_o.gif
“You know why Carl runs so fast? You can run, but you can’t hide from yo’ true self, Mr. Lewis.”
“Hello, the books has been read and the library’s closed.”
Awesome
I should go full on Professor and breed some Atomic Monsters to play sports on teams I support.
http://img2.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20071229210713/en.futurama/images/thumb/c/c9/AtomicSupermen.png/500px-AtomicSupermen.png
Holy fuck. Michio Kaku in a commercial. How did that happen?
Astrophysics don’t pay for shit.
Fuck you, Science Channel.
It’s true. Loads of physicists left academia and are data scientists now. Though I would assume Kaku made a packet off his books. I read Hyperspace when I was 13, it was a big part of why I became a physics major.
Irony?
Was kinda bored in between games, had a couple whiskys due to Blax’s dog passing away andlooked at the soon to be Mrs. Cola, said “Wanna do it?” She said yeah, prior to this question she was reading an article on sexless marriages.
NICELY PLAYED!!!!!!
That’s…poetry.
Well done.
Just cracked the Half Acre Imperial Stout. I like it much more than the Avery. Let syrupy and sweet and more dry and crisp.
Plus, the bottle art has kitties!
I’ve got Newcastle or Bulleit. Starting with the beer and we’ll see what happens.
I love all of you folks.
I’m going to start some heavy drinking now.
START?!
I did that whole fucking game completely sober.
Why? I have no idea.
A QB named Cousins, an offensive team name and they have an O-Lineman that has the last name a Nazi General would have in Lichtensteiger?
Washington is clearly Trump’s favorite team
Right before Walsh shanked that kick I told my wife I had a terrible sinking feeling it would happen.
RTD is an old gypsy woman!!
http://vignette3.wikia.nocookie.net/en.futurama/images/0/05/Futurama_robot_gypsy.jpg/revision/latest?cb=20120324230515
I actually expected him to make it but I thought Seattle would return the kickoff for a touchdown.
Always optimists us Vikings fans.
I can’t think of a theme for pics today. I will continue what I was doing last night. Another Gillian Jacobs
http://media1.popsugar-assets.com/files/2012/10/43/3/301/3019466/9799f3d548ee6a35_MV5BMTMyNDI1NTA1M15BMl5BanBnXkFtZTcwMTk1MTY4NA_._V1._SX640_SY427_.xxxlarge/i/Gillian-Jacobs-Cherry-Daiquiri-Choke-2008.jpg
Couldn’t find a SFW gif. Have a second one of the same scene
http://www1.pictures.zimbio.com/mp/3P6dlw4Sj-sl.jpg
Chloe don’t know better
Chloe’s just like me
(Only beautiful)
Jesus the singles soundtrack was awesome.
Maybe I should have gone out for this game. The baseless optimism of other Skins fans might distract me from my sense of impending doom. Oh well, too late now.
Cannibal sammich time.
The whole Fox studio cast picked the Slurs.
Oh God, they’re fucked.
This was my exact thought.
Howie picked the Packers. Whats his face just got it wrong
Why is Rob Riggle doing this?
To make the rest of the guys look funny by comparison?
Can’t hold down a job at 7-11?
Don’t Americans treat former G.I’s like shit? So he needs the cash for his PTSD disorder.
How was Rob Riggle and his sub-Adam Carolla shtick ever on the Daily Show?
I hope this time is no different
http://www.[*Redacted] sgab.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/10/aaron-rodgers-concussion.jpg
Flashback to when David Alan Grier and Marlon Wayans made a Richard Gere gerbil joke during super bowl halftime: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2OKwRsnWO84
That was the single greatest halftime show in the history is the NFL.
Men on Film!
Hadn’t realized we jumped threads, so again:
http://40.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_manoi8KPyD1rq3b5ko1_r1_500.png
God bless the cluelessness of celebrities
I think she got it. She freaky like that.
Considering her reputation, I actually think she knew exactly what it meant.
perfect.
Me neither.
So I’ll say again….this is Deelightful.
That’s awesome! I’m 99% sure she is self-aware enough that she meant that in the right way.
Erin Andrews’ nasally voice is the wind beneath my wings.
I still credit all the success of this season to the fact that they hired a GM
No question. McCloughan the real MVP
http://i.imgur.com/Yjdmi.gif
Aaron Rodgers just bought a new glass closet apparently.
Oh hell. They have “You Like That” towels. This game is gonna be painful.
“This game is going to be painful.”
– a young woman at a bar, under her breath, as she watches Kellen Clemens approach to hit on her.
Kill the audio. YouTube channel all the way or you’re gonna be smashing shit by halftime.
I gotta have the audio on. It’s like poking a bruise to see if it still hurts.
I am searching for some home-team sanity in this Wild Card Weekend and my final hope lies with the team owned by Dan Snyder.
It’s very strange, isn’t it?
Kirk Cousins is a modern day Dilfer. He needs to be broken before he gets a Superbowl ring. NEVER AGAIN!
Dilfer won on a defense — ours is meh. Our success is “good offense against bad teams”.
Dilfer never had a season close to as good as Cousins. Cousins is this season’s Nick Foles.
http://cdn.makeagif.com/media/9-20-2015/eoV8Sl.gif
She is rather fetching.
60 degrees in January, previous Wild Card game on TV was -2, and Erin rocking the trenchcoat and the turtleneck from hell.
Random quasi-sexist hot taek.
I don’t like Erin Andrews. Her voice annoys me, her interview skills suck, she was awful whenever she tried to anchor, and she reminds me of every irritating sorority girl I’ve ever met.
None of what you said about her is wrong.
Very true. On the plus side, her BF has access to a lot of coke.
Over/Under on Cousins turnovers and my subsequent BAC?
2 TOs, .20 BAC
I can’t pick a number, but I’ll confidently say the relationship will not be linear.
Drove my kids to the gym between games with stern warning to be back to the car by 4:45. Like anybody gives a fuck what I say or care about.
I care! I played river of deceit TWICE because of you!
Huzzah!!
Third time coming up at kickoff, because, let’s face it, both of these teams chose this shit.
Always good to see a parent who understands what fatherhood is all about.
Imma go put my Kerrigan jersey on. BRB.
“Me too”
– Jeff Gillooly
Strong taek. Lead-pipe strong
Rocking #21 Burgundy and Gold!
FRED SMOOT #21-4-EVA!
FIRST STEP TO THE SUPER BOAL, COOOOOCH!
1000 years from now WASPS will worship Payne Stewart as the second coming of Jeebus.
DOK ARE YOU PROPERLY ATTIRED?!
I’ll take 2!
-Jerry Lee Lewis
I can wear the same shirt to meet my friend’s cousin Kirk from Appalachia
There is no god.
Sorry about that, my friend. That was horrible.
Gary Anderson breathes a sigh of relief.
Not only is there no God, but try to get some beer in Canada after 4pm on Sunday.
/stolen from W. Allen
You’re right, but still … Walsh can go fuck his-self.
Feel better.
We have to come up with a new name for this one.
“The Miss” has been used already.
Laces Out is probably available
Consolation all around. Y’all shoulda had that game.
Thanks.
This fucking team man.
I want to apologize in advance for allowing those assholes the opportunity to keep playing.
HERE WE GO, GOD-AWFUL CHARACTERIZATIONS OF NATIVE PEOPLES, HERE WE GO! CLAP CLAP!
The New Zealand Dirty Aborigines are my favorite rugby squad.
Waiting for my over-hyped Skins to blow this game. No way it beats Wounded Knee, but we suck when we’re favored.
Oh. Oh DAMN.
I was actually kind of grateful for the Bengals fuckup, since the Skins PROBABLY can’t fuck up as bad as that. It’s good to have a “it could be worse” example ready.
http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_mdlq3s4vxM1qapai9o1_400.jpg
Dok, you staying home?
Yeah, I would have to already be at the Skins bar to get a seat. My TV is way better anyway and I already paid for the booze at my house.
Also, based on the night I had after going out for the last Skins playoff loss, this is probably the safer option.
Careful, they may take that as a challenge.
Can a person get in Bourble by themself?
Absolutely.
Hi, I’m entropy, and I am full on in bourble
(My iPad now recognizes this word. That is probably its own issue).
Absolutely. That happened almost constantly when I was in college.
I’m still not 100% pat on the definition. Is it when the drink gets you in trouble, whether socially or with the S.O.?
No SO any longer (she was, well, unstable), but I am definitely “20 minutes past dark pissing off the deck” drunk, which has its own stories, so maybe I should slow down some?
Then again, moderation has never worked for me.
FULL STEAM AHEAD!!
I got in bourble with myself last night. Found my glasses in my change jar this morning. Took 30 mins to find them.
Houston: I suck
Cincinnati: I suck harder
Minnesota: OH, LEMME TRY THIS GAME
Traci Lords: Everyone clear the fucking field, k?
Jared: gentlemen…BEHOLD!
Sasha Grey warming up on the sidelines
At least if the fans start throwing trash on the field at Fedex they’ll just be improving the running surface.
https://twitter.com/drewmagary/status/686293269148381184
Go Pack Go! /pisses on throwback Eagles hat to get the colors right
Sooooo, Washington will win, right? Right?
Only if there are some gaping holes in the GB run defense.
http://i.imgur.com/GTRyD.jpg?fb
Pictured: Upcoming [*Redacted] s collapse.
Strahan just called the [*Redacted] s “The Hottest Team in the League Right Now”
That’s a kiss of death, isn’t it.
Favored? We’re fucked.
Into the flood again, same old trip it was back then…..
Fucking great song.
Hells yes, but in a minute, I’m leaving my theme for the Singles soundtrack. Soundgarden “Birth Ritual” FTW!!