Your “They Just Fade Away” Friday Open Thread

NFL Notes:

  • Yeesh. Second-year Eagles WR Nelson Agholor is accused of raping / sexually assaulting a dancer at a strip club near the practice facility. Even worse for the Eagles is that there are reports of two other players with him at the club prior to the incident.
    • UPDATE (7:15 pm) – one story has the rape claim coming after a disagreement about how much the champagne room cost.
  • Oh – I forgot to mention the “Aaron Rodgers” rule yesterday. It’s a clarification of the rule that says if the coin doesn’t flip, it must be reflipped and the team that had the call cannot change their pick. There’s a Rodgers-is-gay joke in there somewhere, but it seems too forced to try and find it.

    “BUILD IT OR THESE KIDS DIE!!!”
  • The Chargers have filed a petition with over 110,000 names on it in support of a ballot initiative for their proposed new stadium. The fine print probably hooks each of those people for $1000 to help subsidize the stadium, which still sounds better than a Verizon contract.
  • A “Good news” story is Devon Still trying to catch on with the Texans, and his daughter Leah is running blocker on JJ Watt & Vince Wilfork.

Finally, Gawker filed for bankruptcy, so either we:

  1. Buy Deadspin; or
  2. Spam the comments and invite their readers over here.

That’s #UpForAnything thinking! You’ll notice the change when the scroll starts advertising for Hooters.


I “met” Gordie Howe twice in my lifetime.

Once was when he played for the Hartford Whalers, and I got his autograph before a Canucks game. I was 12, and raised on his legend. It was also just at the start of the Gretzky era, so it was at the time of the actual torch passing. In those days, the glass on the sides was only three feet high off the boards, so a little kid could stand on the edge and reach over to hand a player something to sign. Gordie was nice enough to come by the group of kids I was with and sign something for everyone. 

The second time was towards the end. He had been made a symbolic co-owner of the Vancouver Giants WHL team. But he took the role of mentor seriously. He came out 1-2 times a year and sat down with the players to offer counsel. I met him at a season-ticket holder handshake. He wasn’t the man he was, but he was still Gordie Howe. His handshake was still a crusher, and I still called him “sir”.

When it was announced that he’d died, those were the things that popped into my head. Not black & white memories of watching him win Cups, Cameron from “Ferris Bueller” wearing a Detroit Howe jersey despite the movie taking place in Chicago, or the stories from Ted Lindsay’s book “Net Worth” (a very good read) which talk about both his playing ferocity and his individualism, both which some players accuse of helping hold down salaries in the 1960s. It’s a 12 year-old kid meeting a living legend, and a 40 year-old man acting like a kid around that same person years later. There’s always going to be the legend, but I’ve got my own stories.

Because it’s a song with hockey connotations, here’s The Tragically Hip – Fireworks.

And because it’s about faded glory and I fucking love The Kinks, here’s “Celluloid Heroes”.


Tonight’s playoff action:

NBA: Golden State @ Cleveland – 9:00

Get to bed early, because Switzerland plays Albania at 9:00 EDT, which doesn’t sound bad until you remember that’s 6:00 AM Pacific time. I’m also meeting my neighbours at the Legion at 9:00 PDT for the Wales-then-England matches, because I talked a lot of shit during qualifying, and now I have to drink my words. SCOTLAND FOREVER!

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Beerguyrob
A Canadian man-child of indeterminate age, he stays young by selling alcohol at sporting events and yelling at the patrons he serves. Their rage nourishes his soul, and their tips pay for his numerous trips to various sporting events.
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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Wonder if she meant the doughnut to look like that….
http://67.media.tumblr.com/56b2f6eb8145b921b735bf7e6451d4d7/tumblr_o8gpdcxVwb1qa1qsoo1_1280.jpg

Damn sexy doughnut.

Duchess

Just rewatched HBO’s Ali’s Greatest Fight. I tell you what you will never understand Ali’s cultural impact until you get the perspective of it from 8 old white men in robes.

Sill Bimmons

JUST GET IT IN THE AIR TO RIGHT

King Hippo

actually, ya wanna hit it to Holliday in LF. He couldn’t throw out my grandmother, and she’s been dead 7 years.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Jays walk off vs Os in 10, so you can both bite me.

ALXMAC

AW NOAH

Sill Bimmons

MERCER TIES IT UP WOO

King Hippo

Rosenthal is monkeyshit. Yinz is just better than us.

WCS

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
theeWeeBabySeamus

Damn right ouch. Yikes.

King Hippo

I have aloe at my house and am surprisingly gentle, just sayin’

Doktor Zymm

And she already had freckles. SO MUCH SKIN CANCER.

Sill Bimmons
theeWeeBabySeamus

Why do the sperms got pointy heads?
Why are they swimming straight for that blister?
Will you buy me an Cgacaac Cat?
Is the “g” silent in Cgacaac?

Sill Bimmons

None of those questions have what you’d call “answers.”

theeWeeBabySeamus

Just in a silly mood. Just ignore me. Works well for everyone else I think.

Sill Bimmons

I know.

I was also joking.

theeWeeBabySeamus

I know!!!

theeWeeBabySeamus

No…YOU hang up first.

Sill Bimmons

MARTE WITH THE LEADOFF TRIPLE WOO

King Hippo

At the risk of commiting Canadia blasphemy, I must note that the first Gordie pic is remarkably Sandusky-ish.

Doktor Zymm

“Hi, I’m a cat, I’m also the only likable member of my purported family”

Doktor Zymm

Yup, wrong comment reply. Though totally in favor of Candian Blasphemy.

Duchess

“Do you like movies about gladiators?”

herodotus450

Have you ever been to a Turkish bath?

theeWeeBabySeamus

Uncle Gordie would NEVAR!!!!!!

King Hippo

well, maybe that one time at camp…

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Off Topic, I would like to formally register my opposition/disgust with family pets having their own social media profiles. Enough is enough.

Carry on.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

I don’t look near as cute as Cara Delevingne when I do this in a hotel room.

http://66.media.tumblr.com/46fb199b5e601335e35b26ecacbb7bd0/tumblr_o69gw6opkF1tlrqi3o3_250.gif

Duchess

So if Uproxx buys Deadspin we riot!

BrettFavresColonoscopy

A high-scoring but close game? I guess the Cavs aren’t pure garbage.

Duchess

Fucking entitled cats… think they are all king of the jungle.

Spur
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Sill Bimmons

That’s a public urination ordnance I don’t think I’d want to trifle with.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Talk about your “double jeopardy”…amirite????

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

“What?”

_Lance Armstrong

Sill Bimmons

“Huh?”

–Adolf Hitler, of the Bariloche Hitlers

laserguru

Just got home from work.

This just got added to Request Line.

What’s happening DFO All Stars?

Sill Bimmons

1937 Bentley 4.25 Litre Gurney Nutting Sedanca Coupé:

comment image

Sill Bimmons

/reply fail

Spur

McAdoo about to set a record for Finals fouls.

WCS

King Hippo

THAT LOOKS LIKE MY CAT!!!

/definitely was not taken at my house

Spur

Could you imagine how choppy the NBA would be if the refs actually called traveling?

herodotus450

Idea Number 155 to decrease scoring in basketball: The team that commits a foul gets the ball.

Sill Bimmons

Fuck you sideways with a Stihl Carpenter you motherfucker.

comment image

theeWeeBabySeamus

Goddamn!!!
/wants one
//hell…wants TWO

BrettFavresColonoscopy

That sounds like less fun than a cactus dildo.

Spur

Steph still reeling from twitter seeing his ugly ass shoes

Doktor Zymm

I offended/confused some Argentina fans by asking if they were from Munich. SAME FUCKING COLORS AMIRITE?!

theeWeeBabySeamus

Wait, wait, wait….Munich isn’t in Argentina?
/shouldn’t have slept thru geography class

Sill Bimmons
ballsofsteelandfury

Beat me to it.

Stupid phone.

herodotus450

Same rotationally symmetric insignia, same arm salute, anybody could confuse those two countries.

WCS

Britta’d it, indeed.

Spur
WCS

theeWeeBabySeamus

Most serendipitous photobomb in EVAR!!!!
Yeah baby…now slowly slide your hands down to the….
….AAAAAHH…PUSSY!!!!!!

Sill Bimmons

INSANE ENDING HOLY SHIT

Spur

First time watching Planet Of The Apes?
http://i.makeagif.com/media/5-01-2014/K9QN86.gif

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

The 1938 Phantom Corsair was the radical product of Rust Heinz (as in the ketchup company). The Phantom Corsair had many features that were ahead of the it’s time and many others that were little more than curious gimmicks. It featured an altimeter and electronic doors. The exotic shape was able to accommodate four people side by side in the front row but only 2 in the back due to space taken up by beverage cabinets. Rust Heinz designed the radical car on the popular Cord 810 platform and one example was built that he used as his personal car until his death at the young age of 25. The car was intended to go into production at the price of $12,500 in 1938, equating to over $200,000 today.

Today the car exists fully restored in the National Automobile museum in Reno Nevada after a long life of curious modifications, including being painted gold for a time.
http://67.media.tumblr.com/b94324b228912fd5c039d0b41223fda0/tumblr_o7m4b8dW391vvnlapo2_1280.jpg

Sill Bimmons

The 30s were totally rad for auto design:

comment image

1938 Cord 814 Custom Cabriolet

Doktor Zymm

Hell, if I had an extra $200,000 I would buy it. Way better than the shit that costs that much nowadays. I’m all for the lifestyle that works in the auto, rather than the lifestyle defined by the auto. Also…the closed hubs? Snow accumulation?

Sill Bimmons

My guess is a rudimentary stab at aerodynamics as they were just starting to design cars in wind tunnels.

The first?

The 1934 Chrysler Imperial Airflow:

http://media.caranddriver.com/images/05q3/267434/1934-chrysler-cx-lebaron-custom-imperial-airflow-town-sedan-photo-207481-s-429×262.jpg

Sill Bimmons

1938 Buick “Y” Concept:

comment image

Sill Bimmons

Damn, these Bolivian players had better shut up or they’re not going to have a team for the rest of the tournament.

Sill Bimmons

PENALPENALPENALPENALPENALPENALPENALPENALPENALPENALPENALPENALPENALPENALPENALPENALPENALPENALPENALPENALPENALPENALPENALPENALPENALPENALPENALPENALPENALPENALPENALPENALPENALPENALPENALPENALPENALPENALPENALPENALPENALPENALPENALPENALPENALPENALPENALPENALPENALPENALPENALPENALPENALPENALPENALPENALPENALPENALPENALPENALPENALPENALPENALPENALPENALPENALPENALPENALPENALPENALPENALPENALPENALPENALPENAL

JustStopDude

Damn it…sitting at my bar, waiting for my date to show up, and a coworker sits next to me with his wife….

SonOfSpam

Just hit on the wife.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

WCS

SNOOGINS

herodotus450

Now I know why the NBA is so popular! They have the ASL version of the national anthem, they’re catering to the deaf audience that the NHL is notorious for ignoring.

WCS

Also, Gary Bettman makes Roger Goodell almost (ALMOST) likable and seemingly competent.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
SonOfSpam

My favorite kind of beer is the Sculpin bomber I didn’t know about that my wife must’ve bought a few days ago. SURPRISE GOOD BEER IS THE BEST.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

The only penis you WANT to serve limp.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Well done.

herodotus450

Somebody put a note on your spoon!

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Evening, all. About to tuck into some gnocchi, sausage, zucchini, and cauliflower. I’m finally recovered from the weeklong headcold, so I might antagonize myself by busting out some booze for the first time all week…

SonOfSpam

That dog bed looks pretty nice.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

This is completely different than when I took wood shop.
http://66.media.tumblr.com/f556c9443705d6b4747b900c7fb3fc9b/tumblr_o805pa9bMW1qdq0oso1_1280.jpg

/he said wood.

Doktor Zymm

There are some places you really don’t want splinters…

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

I’m thinking they have extra sandpaper.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I don’t know about you, but I consider ALL places to be places where I really don’t want splinters.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Exception for political factions.

SonOfSpam

You have to sand those frequently to get all the sap out.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Ummmm….do I want to ask (and risk knowing that one or more of you might actually know the answer…which would scare me) what that one in the background on the left is supposed to be? Because where I’m sitting, there appears to be a very distinct….let’s say “receptacle”.

SonOfSpam

Russian genitalia may be very different from ours.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

It is an art cock depicting an elephant. A trunk dick, if you will.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Just when I thought it couldn’t get any weirder….

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Not even started.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

Of course my Hot Wheels tract didn’t look quite like this either.

http://67.media.tumblr.com/c630f233d20293716215c2e5d1a63919/tumblr_o6sxswu8AK1tbhgn7o1_1280.jpg

Sill Bimmons

Ugh, she reads Tolstoy.

That means lots of tedious, turgid, tragic foreplay that doesn’t go anywhere for ages.

But those dildos will get used. You can bet kulak on that.

SonOfSpam

“War and Piece”

Doktor Zymm

War and Peace is quite riveting after the first 200 pages. It helps to be trapped on long train trips when classics are the cheapest way to buy english language books. I also read Hardy and didn’t think it was as tedious as people say.

Sill Bimmons

I can’t even get through the first 20 pages of Game Of Thrones.

theeWeeBabySeamus

I once dated one of Gordie Howe’s nieces for a short time. Cute girl. Not much going on upstairs, tho.
Didn’t last long. Neither of us were terribly broken up about it ending. No we’re not still friends…No we don’t hate each other. That’s how alarmingly indifferent to her I was. And presumably she to me.
/true story bro

theeWeeBabySeamus

Also…she said “Uncle Gordie” a lot.

ballsofsteelandfury

During sex?!?

theeWeeBabySeamus

Now THAT was funny. Bravo. 😀
And no.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

comment image

herodotus450

Gave her the ol’ Gordie Howe Hat Trick, if you know what I mean

SonOfSpam

Nice work on the Howe tribute. One of the reasons we love sports to begin with and all that.

Doktor Zymm

Had to stay late at work, but it was just waiting for stuff to run, so I could avail myself of the kegerator. Now at a nearby bar because waiting for the bus was boring and I get extra air miles here, and next to me are people speaking Spanish and rooting for Bolivia! So, go Bolivia!

Also, fried pickles or hummus plate? Or nachos? Or zucchini fries? Or Mini Thanksgiving? The mind boggles at the app selection!

SonOfSpam

You have a kegerator at work? Damn, being a doctor sounds cool.

Doktor Zymm

There was also can and bottle beer leftover from the launch party yesterday. I need to start drinking more work booze, don’t know why I’m paying for the stuff myself. I should bring a growler.

SonOfSpam

/sends in application to Hollywood Upstairs Medical College

WCS

Drinking at The Legion?

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
scotchnaut

Getting hammered tonight in anticipation of working outside all day tomorrow in 30+ Celcius temperatures. For you Americans, that’s like 240 degrees farvidnugen.

ballsofsteelandfury

That’s a pretty sweet 86 degrees south of the border. Not sure what the fuss is.

/lives in SoCal
//them’s perfect beach weather!

SonOfSpam

Right? Sounds like it might get chilly at night.

Doktor Zymm

Meh, having walked around extensivly in 48 C heat in the mid east I pity you not.

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