Your Very Last (For Quite Some Time) Non-NFL Related Sunday Open Thread

Can the football just happen already? No? Guh! I’ll go off on a different tangent. Okay. I’ll say it. You guys are great. I’m interested in 75 to 80% of what you yak about because of your interests outside The Football and your Not-Insane postings about football/your team. You’ve daily re-enforced the notion that I should not take this stupid game *too* seriously and for that I’m grateful. Tell me what you’ve done today or are about to do. Myself and others are Curious Yellow.*

*obscure Swedish film reference because I’m bored

 

 

 

 

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Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

My wife and I refer to Quantico as “Sex Academy”. We both agree that Priyanka Chopra is crazy smoking hot.

John Difool

You’re wife too?

That’s hawt…

Spur

Texas learned how to score points. Fuck.

Spur

Why is Notre Dame still rotating their QBs?

King Hippo

Zaire knows where some bodies are buried??

Sill Bimmons

The Stillers have traded for Justin Gilbert in an attempt to out-Barkevious teh Pats:

http://www.post-gazette.com/sports/steelers/2016/09/03/Steelers-acquire-Justin-Gilbert-in-trade/stories/201609030129

Spur

Dr Congo is a bad quarterback

John Difool

I HAVEN’T SEEN LONGHORN’S STIFFING THE IRISH THIS HARD SINCE THEY SAID THEY COULDN’T SET UP BAR TABS THERE.

Darkest Timeline Zack Morris

I’m about to see Prophets of Rage. If you don’t hear from Internet Dad again, I’m in jail and need bail.

Sharkbait

Jealous. Enjoy the show!

Darkest Timeline Zack Morris

Thanks man – they were great! Highly recommended!

herodotus450

Hey! Shouldn’t there be a True Detective season going on right now?

King Hippo

“Westworld” looks to be their prestige entry of the autumn. Great cast, hope it’s not poop.

herodotus450

Hmm, never heard of it before, or the book it is based on. Was Michael Crichton molested at an amusement park or something?

Spur

Jesus, Notre Dame’s secondary is trash.

theeWeeBabySeamus

That’s Touchdown Jesus to you.

King Hippo

dunno why the Irish nevar seem to expect that play to be run again, but glad for slow larnin’ curve

Spur

Folks!

Sill Bimmons

WOO not Notre Dame!

King Hippo

it’s like, my 2nd alma mater!!

John Difool

Second half of football will feature the Keyser Soze’s of Texas vs. the Dean Keaton’s of Notre Dame

John Difool

Second half football will feature the Keyser Soze’s of Texas vs. the Dean Keaton’s of Texas.

Sill Bimmons
theeWeeBabySeamus

Anyone have any wonderful plans tomorrow? I expect to try to relax and avoid human contact right up until a family member decides their failure to plan should be an emergency for me. So, pretty much nothing out of the ordinary.

Sharkbait

Only thing I’m doing is daydrinking and fish tacos.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Yeah, my most common defenses against the above is get drunk early or hide out at the golf course with phone turned off.

King Hippo

Huzzah, less evil JV NFL squadron!!

King Hippo

I still can’t believe my footy side’s season is ruined because THIS FUCKING GUY didn’t win the starting job. Sad but true, bro…

John Difool

Buuuuuuuuurrrrrrrnnnnnnnn………

Sill Bimmons

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Sill Bimmons

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Sill Bimmons

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Shogun Marcus

I presume that’s the soon to be former? RG 1 1/2? Timings good seeing as the money spigot is getting turnt off.

herodotus450

The only question left is who gets to keep the fan-bought wedding presents

John Difool

Well at least he has his own Mistake by the Lake.

Shogun Marcus

Hey babe…I got good news and bad news. Ok, bad first. I’ve been having an affair. I’m so sorry.
Oh god! I don’t know what to say. I…I…wha…what’s the good news?
I got another gig! We’re going to Cleveland!
Fuck you. HALF EDDIE!!!

King Hippo

WHA’ HAVE YOU DONE FOR ME LATELY??

Shogun Marcus

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BrettFavresColonoscopy

I made a LOT of cocktails last night, not sure I have an appetite for more tonight. What are the rest of you drinking?

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Ballast Point Scottish Ale.

Horatio Cornblower

I haven’t seen that one. How is it?

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

It’s okay. A pretty big step down from Old Chubb, but certainly potable.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Guinness

Sharkbait

I’ve had 2 manhattans. Debating on if I want another.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Yes

Sharkbait

Well, can’t argue with that logic.

blaxabbath

Clears until after Labor Day.

Horatio Cornblower

Treehouse Haze

John Difool

Ice De Hause

Zero fucks given.

Sill Bimmons

Liquid fuckin’ sunlight bruh!

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theeWeeBabySeamus

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theeWeeBabySeamus

I’ve given up liquor for at least the time being. But Vodka is/was my go to.

laserguru

A bottle of cote du Rhone, a lovely French red. Had enough beer for the moment. I’ll switch back when I feel the need to do shots.

theeWeeBabySeamus

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Bloody Lethal

All week I heard about this storm in NY. Where the hell is it?

herodotus450

Been watching football for 8 hours so far this season, already want to kill myself instead of watching one more commercial. IF YOUR UNDERWEAR HAS TO BE DRY CLEANED I’M NOT GOING TO BUY IT!

John Difool

I HAVEN’T SEEN A FOREMAN RUN OVER SOMEBODY LIKE THIS SINCE….

http://stream1.gifsoup.com/view6/20140706/5065125/robocop-toxic-death-o.gif

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

That is superb.

LemonJello

“I’d buy that for a dollar!”

herodotus450

Hot taek: 5 yards is (almost) never worth the timeout you use to avoid a delay of game penalty

theeWeeBabySeamus

Punting also sucks.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Somewhat long and stat intensive, but interesting if you can get thru it.

Sill Bimmons

Sup GREGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG

Sill Bimmons

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herodotus450

You only get 3 timeouts per half, so as long as you gain more than 15 yards per half it’s not worth it. The numbers speak for themselves

Sill Bimmons

So we’re doing Jack Reacher again?

Was this something the world was asking for?

John Difool

I actually asked for Taken 45….or is it 46 now?

Sill Bimmons

When they get to 50 they’re going to just call it “The Taken.”

Mr. Ayo

Taken the L

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Bill Belichick has taken a 45 and a 46 on consecutive nights.

LemonJello

“Grumble grumble, who’s mom is next…grumble grumble?”

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Thanks for your interest in my life, scotchy. I woke up at the asscrack of dawn to debut in an over 30 baseball game. Unrelated, I’m currently icing my back.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

“Icing my back” sounds like a hazing ritual Matt Leinert would institute on newly drafted skill players.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

That drop is what I imagine point shaving looks like.

King Hippo

I can honestly say that, outside of Penn State, no JV side has primary uniform colours any uglier than these two. A true mortal sin against STYLE.

theeWeeBabySeamus

I feel the need to toss Oregon in the ring.
But since their cheerleaders look way not bad in the colors, I’ll relent.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

I don’t know what you’re watching but my counterpoint is Maryland

theeWeeBabySeamus

No meteor yet, huh?

Sill Bimmons

I’ll always have the tiniest shred of respect for the UT system because their law school wouldn’t admit George W. Bush.

King Hippo

what a fookin’ catch by NOT NOTRE DAME WOO!!!

Sill Bimmons

They’ve started locking out university faculty:

http://www.eschatonblog.com/2016/09/the-worst-people-in-world.html

If this happens at a school that actually matters it could change higher education permanently and much for the worse.

Sharkbait

Holy shit that’s a dangerous ass precedent to set.

herodotus450

They don’t even have a $100 Million endowment yet, of course they can’t pay faculty!

herodotus450

And they’re basically GIVING an education away at only 34k tuition per year plus fees.

John Difool
laserguru

I think it was Ingmar Bergmann who directed the film Scotchy made reference to.
I washed the batmobile today and grilled the za’atar chicken and made some yogurt garlic sauce, red onion relish and homemade hummus.
Watched the Cubbies walk off against the Giants to finish a 6-1 homestand against what were supposed to be 2 NL powerhouses SF and Pittsburgh and now I’m just sipping some brews and chilling the fuck out.

You could say today was a good day.

Sill Bimmons

Wow.

You people are going to go into lightspeed past SAWX fans if you actually pull this off.

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laserguru

Dude I’m a life long Cubs and Vikings fan I need a moment.
I’m sure the Cubs will find a way to self destruct spectacularly. It’s in my team’s DNA.

Sill Bimmons

It’s just funny and you can’t tell me it isn’t true.

About Cubs fans, anyway.

As for the Vikings part–dude, that just sucked. I always liked Teddy Bridgewater and hoped he’d stick his thumb in the eyes of some obnoxious Packers fans. Hope he can turn it back around when he gets better.

laserguru

I do too. He just seems like such a good kid.

laserguru

And we had a high of 72 with a light offshore breeze.

Sill Bimmons

See above.

Bloody Lethal
Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Well, at least I’ll get to see some sad cowboys.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I’m not sure if I’m rooting against Notre Dame here because their coach is literally culpable for the death of a student or because the institution willfully ignored rape allegations against a football player so completely that the only way the case got any actual attention was after the victim had committed suicide.

Sharkbait

If you’re rooting against college teams with rape allegations, just turn on college water polo right now.

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

I am sure the water polo teams are just as rapey, it’s just easier to sweep under the rug when it isn’t football

King Hippo

Little column A, Little column B?

Sill Bimmons

Yes.

Sharkbait

Added a little too much mayo in the lobster roll. Still doesnt suck.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

“Doesn’t suck” is just a code word for “elite”.

Sharkbait

Aww man, I just made the Joe Flacco of lobster rolls.

Sill Bimmons

Joe Flacco’s Fathead says this in a giant voice bubble.

Sill Bimmons

I hate all seafood, but it has always seemed like a waste to me to cover lobster meat with mayo.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

You spelled “abortion” wrong.

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

Out of morbid curiosity I went and looked it up. Why is the woman from Children’s Hospital his wife? I thought she was his kid at first. Dying your hair an unnatural color doesn’t mask the 30 year age difference. Also, getting past that it looks terrible.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Oh, I get it, it’s a play on “heaven can wait”. Very amusing.

Sharkbait

Holy shit that looks awful. How does Kevin James still keep getting work?

Sill Bimmons

Because Trump voters.

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

I still can’t remember which of you were talking up “You’re the Worst” the other day, but it is an excellent show and I thank you for it.

Sharkbait

I may have mentioned it a couple times. That show is awesome.

theeWeeBabySeamus

I’ve mentioned it a time or two meself.

Sharkbait

What did I do today? I worked until 3, then got lobsters and proceeded to make lobster rolls for dinner tonight. While wielding a chef knife I made sure to have a manhattan by my side.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

When you said “wielding a chef knife” and “Manhattan” I thought you were going to make some kind of joke about Fitzpatrick Bateman.

Sharkbait

Damnit! Obvious joke is obvious.

Brick Meathook

I cleaned out my kitchen cupboards and refrigerator, and I mean thoroughly.

In addition to realizing that I have 7 different kinds of mustard on hand, I threw out an unopened box of healthy bran cereal that had expired in 2010. I also organized all the spices alphabetically and by container shape & style.

This is the most exciting thing that happened to me this weekend.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I’m currently engaged in a project to clear out my freezer by eating everything in it. Last night I had some falafel and some corn! Tonight we’ll be having tater tots.

The Right Reverend Electric Mayhem

I drafted a stupid demand letter for a stupid client who doesn’t actually want what he insists on demanding. I hope he gets it and is exactly as fucked as I’ve told him he will be.

“Everybody gets what everyone wants. I wanted a mission, and for my sins they gave me one.” -Captain Willard

ballsofsteelandfury

There is absolutely nothing on, so I’m watching NASCAR. I may either 1) fall asleep or 2) turn the TV off and watch a DVD of Deadpool.

Which one will happen first? STAY TUNED!

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

So this morning I did my weekly brunch with my mom so I don’t have to deal with her calling me all the time saying I don’t love her. I brought my dog because he likes hanging out with my moms dog. On the way home I stopped to pick up soda. I parked in the spot you can see from inside the store so my pup would be able to see me other than the 15 seconds I wasn’t visible through the door. 3 min total for the shopping. I get outside to get lectured by some random 50 year old white woman about how I am mistreating my dog, and I am a terrible person. I do the normal “yes ma’am” through the rant while her husband looks at me apologetically. I explain my car was heavily air conditioned and it is maybe 70 out today. She responds with I am gonna call the police if I ever see you mistreat your dog like this again. So I got to scream “Fuck you bitch” at someone not sarcastically today but it happened 5 hours ago and I am still angry at her and I never really get angry. I’ll admit to bitching too much, but I never get really angry. I hate her and hope she dies. My dad had a heartwarming reply when I talked about it before. “She’ll probably get breast cancer and die anyways, let it go”

ballsofsteelandfury

It’s always nice when you can say “Fuck you bitch!” on a holiday weekend.

John Difool

Well at least you didn’t call her a cunt. Women, even old as fuck women turn into estrogen fueled death-bots when you use that.

Something about that word that brings out the Terminator in them.

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

I think I could have gotten away with a cunt if I wanted. I am mild mannered most of the time but my actually mad yelling voice is scary as shit.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

The word that used to set my mom off was “dildo”. Back when we were kids and didn’t know what the word actually meant we’d call each other dildos sometimes and man would she get furious.

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