Your Sunday Night NFL Football “Piece Of Resistance” Open Thread

Don’t know why I bother to teach French to you guys but, oh well.

Pats/Cards-Both Brady and Gronk are out of this one so we’ll only hear about them 40% of the time. Yay! Cards hc Arians is 11-2 against the AFC. If the Pats win the division championship, guess who I’m cheering for? (perhaps I’m getting a wee bit ahead of myself) Arizona’s O looks like world-beaters. Rb’s Johnson and Johnson are above average and so is the wr trio of Fitz, Brown and Floyd. The D is solid and cb Peterson can take out your #1 receiver. The Pats start the season 0-1? Let the showerfreud* begin!

*some German word I may have misspelled

 

 

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Doktor Zymm

Ew, what’s on Belichick’s elbow?

LemonJello

Some of the herpes that’s on his lip?

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

I would just assume some strange disease from whatever 50 year old mom from Boston he tricked into bed

theeWeeBabySeamus

Nite folks. Hopefully Tawmmy will be crying later and will be forced to fellate Giselle when the plane lands.

But I’m outta here either way.

Covalent Blonde

Good night, mon ami! Sleep well!

theeWeeBabySeamus

Bite me

Gratliff

This old throwback from when Arizona knocked the Eagles out the last time Philly was considered a real threat.
http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_NwMmft2Mlzg/SXehTtEwwUI/AAAAAAAAAp0/wW6LEv-9fMA/s400/fitzgerald-predator.jpg

Covalent Blonde

Sweet fuck… as much as I hate giving credit to anything related to USC football, that was outstanding passing!

Buddy Cole's Halftime Show

That was what Peter Jennings wished he could say during the OJ chase

BrettFavresColonoscopy

This may be the scotch talking, but today has been a lot of fun. Good work, everyone.

Sharkbait

Might wanna cover that Fitzgerald guy. He seems pretty good at footy.

Beastmode Ate My Baby

The Palmer-to-Fitz action is great. Too bad one or both of them will be on IR before the season is done.

Gratliff

Before the quarter, god willing.

Gratliff

Fitzgerald just stomping on what little hope I had of coming back. He fucks my real life teams and fantasy teams.

King Hippo

Fitty does so much to make Carson Palmer almost seem competent (in the stat line). He’s a fucking magician.

Old School Zero

Didn’t they have Fitty AND Anquan Boldin for a while? That’s like QB bailout heaven.

King Hippo

No coincidence, one of Kurt Warner’s “Hall of Fame” years

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Two minutes in Arizona: how Blax’s lady describes their lovelife

Doktor Zymm

I visited Minneapolis once, it was an enjoyable city. Maybe I should try going to a game there this year in the new stadium.

Buddy Cole's Halftime Show

Built with ennui and Lutheran passive-agressiveness.

Covalent Blonde

I like to think of “schmegabytes” as code for “I reply to all in a group text or email.”

Doktor Zymm

It’s yet another synonym for “I’m proud of being ignorant”

Doktor Zymm

I don’t think that’s how beer is supposed to work….

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

Corona isn’t really beer anyways. How would they know?

Doktor Zymm

Excellent point.

Buddy Cole's Halftime Show

“SAYS FUCKING WHO?”

– Bernie Kosar

Old School Zero

Garroponope

Doktor Zymm

So, Chicago has the Magnificent Mile, there’s a Miracle Mile, and some other miles with a modifying adjective starting with ‘M’. Why does no city in the world have a Kickass Kilometer? If you’re gonna go metric, that’s no reason to abandon alliteration.

Mr. Ayo

Killer Kilometer
Kangaroo Kilometer
Krazy Kilometer

Buddy Cole's Halftime Show

Favre had a Falsified Foot

BrettFavresColonoscopy

:slowclap:

Covalent Blonde

You know what’s fun? 4.5 minutes sans TOs. That’s fun! This feels fun.

WCS

Bruce Arians: Proud Graduate of the Andy Reid School of Clock Management

Buddy Cole's Halftime Show

The diploma is a broken watch.

Dick E. Phuck

AKA University of Phoenix

BrettFavresColonoscopy

I guess we can add Magnificent Seven to the list of films that didn’t need to be remade but were anyway

Buddy Cole's Halftime Show

Bill Belichick looks like the guy who takes your bets at OTB and then tries to finger your wife when you go take a pee.

Covalent Blonde

“Thanks to the hernia my man has from lifting my stupid amounts of rubbish he has some ED problems now…”

Beastmode Ate My Baby

I heartlessly mock what I call the “limp dick” ads.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

At least they’ve moved on from separate bathtubs. “Use our dick pill to masturbate next to someone in water.”

Croooow

Cris is so shamelessly rooting for the Patriots.

Doktor Zymm

Delay of Game is abbreviated as DOG which is GOD backwards!!!!! COINCIDENCE!?

Old School Zero

HAIL BLEERGH!

WCS

GAWD IS OHHN OWAH SIDE NO ONE DENIES THIS

WCS

YOU CONVERT A THIRD-DOWN AND YOU CONVERT A THIRD-DOWN AND YOU CONVERT A THIRD-DOWN

Doktor Zymm

Conversation overheard on the plane :
“Fucking Detroit, I hate Matt Stafford he’s such a dick”
“Yeah, yelling at his receivers like that, but what do you expect he’s from Georgia”

I refrained from saying, “Yeah, you gotta yell at your receivers like Marmalard does, that’s LEADERSHIP!”

BrettFavresColonoscopy

5 yard sacks are usually only found on the cover of National Geographic

Old School Zero

Oh damn

Moonbatting Average

That’s a spicy meatball

Old School Zero

Oh, Frank Lloyd Wright? Neat. Did you know Andrew Luck is an architect, too? Here’s his version of Fallingwater:

http://farm8.staticflickr.com/7435/11898839745_36be273df7_o.gif

Sharkbait

Fitty is the reason why everyone’s 1A team to win the Superb Owl this year is Arizona when inevitably most of our teams get eliminated right?

King Hippo

Thursday. Bills. Jets. Somebody has to win!

WCS

4-4 tie

Beastmode Ate My Baby

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Sharkbait

Meteor 2016 makes an early debate appearance.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

They should lock all the fans in after the game and never let anyone out.

Buddy Cole's Halftime Show

The gene pool since it’s a Thursday night game in Buffalo.

Duchess

Ya know guys I am kind of getting tired of Chris Collinsworth talking down to everyone about every bad play.

Brocky

I don’t think his brain allows him to not be condescending as much as possible

theeWeeBabySeamus

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I Will Dye Blonde

Can you post non-Kristen Bell pics… I’m missing Debbie Harry… Wait, no Moose tonight? Damn, maybe he is dead in HRTN.

Doktor Zymm

Okily, I have eaten of the pizza, I have dranken of the wine, and I have watchethed of the football. Verily, shit be good.

theeWeeBabySeamus

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Brocky

So, am I the only one who is kinda hoping NE goes 4-0 without brady? the rest of the AFC east lost today, and we know none of them had a serious chance to begin with, so there’s more long term entertainment value in dissension among the idiotic boston faithful

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

I think the Patriots are the one team I really just hate. Maybe they could all get cancer and die slowly

Brocky

Don’t get me wrong, I hate them to, but I hate them because of sportscasters more than anything else, as opposed to colts and packers fans.

C’mon, short term loss long term gain!

Shogun Marcus

We know the PAT is 33 yards now. Stahp.

Croooow

Next thing you’ll tell me is that the yellow line is unofficial.

Buddy Cole's Halftime Show

33 yards is also the distance Bill Belichick keeps from the nearest minority.

Or so I hear.

Shogun Marcus

That’s Chip Kelly.

ThePirateSloth

Was that penalty called “gaping”?

heh

Doktor Zymm

How many lords a leapin’ are there?

Old School Zero

Fitty?

Beastmode Ate My Baby

Twelve…five…three…

AAGH! TOO MUCH PRESSURE

theeWeeBabySeamus

eleventy billion. ALWAYS go with eleventy billion.

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Fitty always good to take a shot or nine

hippofant

My mouth is literally still hanging open from that catch.

Doktor Zymm

As long as you close it before something flies in there.

Doktor Zymm

That thar is good footballsing

makeitsnowondem

CRACKERS FOR FITTY

Old School Zero

Larry Fitzgerald: Not Dead Yet

WCS

fitty good

Sharkbait

Dear liver:

I’m sorry, it’s not my fault. It’s New England’s.

Sincerely,

Sharkbait

WCS

Cris just admitted to having brain damage. Does that count as self-awareness?

theeWeeBabySeamus

Sliding scale. For him we’ll call it a win.

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

He already forgot he said it.

Buddy Cole's Halftime Show

It’s like Roethlisberger admitting to “Silly Dick”

Old School Zero

Has there been a better player with a more generic name than David Johnson?

Dick E. Phuck

Lawrence Taylor

theeWeeBabySeamus

Fuck that U*NC pussy. So to speak.

King Hippo

I think that’s why he lasted so long in the draft

BrettFavresColonoscopy

Ray Guy?

Buddy Cole's Halftime Show

Come on, former punter Scott Player?

Croooow

David Johnson is the man.

King Hippo

and after he does that circus play, what do they do? Go away from him completely two plays in a row.

King Hippo

SEE!!!??

Doktor Zymm

Neat.

Covalent Blonde

Come on, Pyrrholuxia! Do it!

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theeWeeBabySeamus

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theeWeeBabySeamus

Jeebus was a huge duck…little known fact.
http://gifsec.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/03/Ducks-GIFS.gif

WCS

HAIL BLEERGH

Also, greetings, you miscreants.