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Your Sunday Night NFL Football “Piece Of Resistance” Open Thread

scotchnaut

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Don’t know why I bother to teach French to you guys but, oh well.

Pats/Cards-Both Brady and Gronk are out of this one so we’ll only hear about them 40% of the time. Yay! Cards hc Arians is 11-2 against the AFC. If the Pats win the division championship, guess who I’m cheering for? (perhaps I’m getting a wee bit ahead of myself) Arizona’s O looks like world-beaters. Rb’s Johnson and Johnson are above average and so is the wr trio of Fitz, Brown and Floyd. The D is solid and cb Peterson can take out your #1 receiver. The Pats start the season 0-1? Let the showerfreud* begin!

*some German word I may have misspelled

 

 

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Doktor Zymm

Ew, what’s on Belichick’s elbow?

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LemonJello

Some of the herpes that’s on his lip?

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Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

I would just assume some strange disease from whatever 50 year old mom from Boston he tricked into bed

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theeWeeBabySeamus

Nite folks. Hopefully Tawmmy will be crying later and will be forced to fellate Giselle when the plane lands.

But I’m outta here either way.

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Covalent Blonde

Good night, mon ami! Sleep well!

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theeWeeBabySeamus

Bite me

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Gratliff

This old throwback from when Arizona knocked the Eagles out the last time Philly was considered a real threat.
http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_NwMmft2Mlzg/SXehTtEwwUI/AAAAAAAAAp0/wW6LEv-9fMA/s400/fitzgerald-predator.jpg

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Covalent Blonde

Sweet fuck… as much as I hate giving credit to anything related to USC football, that was outstanding passing!

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Buddy Cole's Halftime Show

That was what Peter Jennings wished he could say during the OJ chase

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BrettFavresColonoscopy

This may be the scotch talking, but today has been a lot of fun. Good work, everyone.

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Sharkbait

Might wanna cover that Fitzgerald guy. He seems pretty good at footy.

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Beastmode Ate My Baby

The Palmer-to-Fitz action is great. Too bad one or both of them will be on IR before the season is done.

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Gratliff

Before the quarter, god willing.

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Gratliff

Fitzgerald just stomping on what little hope I had of coming back. He fucks my real life teams and fantasy teams.

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King Hippo

Fitty does so much to make Carson Palmer almost seem competent (in the stat line). He’s a fucking magician.

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Old School Zero

Didn’t they have Fitty AND Anquan Boldin for a while? That’s like QB bailout heaven.

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King Hippo

No coincidence, one of Kurt Warner’s “Hall of Fame” years

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BrettFavresColonoscopy

Two minutes in Arizona: how Blax’s lady describes their lovelife

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Doktor Zymm

I visited Minneapolis once, it was an enjoyable city. Maybe I should try going to a game there this year in the new stadium.

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Buddy Cole's Halftime Show

Built with ennui and Lutheran passive-agressiveness.

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Covalent Blonde

I like to think of “schmegabytes” as code for “I reply to all in a group text or email.”

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Doktor Zymm

It’s yet another synonym for “I’m proud of being ignorant”

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Doktor Zymm

I don’t think that’s how beer is supposed to work….

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Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

Corona isn’t really beer anyways. How would they know?

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Doktor Zymm

Excellent point.

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Buddy Cole's Halftime Show

“SAYS FUCKING WHO?”

– Bernie Kosar

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Old School Zero

Garroponope

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Doktor Zymm

So, Chicago has the Magnificent Mile, there’s a Miracle Mile, and some other miles with a modifying adjective starting with ‘M’. Why does no city in the world have a Kickass Kilometer? If you’re gonna go metric, that’s no reason to abandon alliteration.

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Mr. Ayo

Killer Kilometer
Kangaroo Kilometer
Krazy Kilometer

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Buddy Cole's Halftime Show

Favre had a Falsified Foot

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BrettFavresColonoscopy

:slowclap:

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Covalent Blonde

You know what’s fun? 4.5 minutes sans TOs. That’s fun! This feels fun.

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WCS

Bruce Arians: Proud Graduate of the Andy Reid School of Clock Management

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Buddy Cole's Halftime Show

The diploma is a broken watch.

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Dick E. Phuck

AKA University of Phoenix

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BrettFavresColonoscopy

I guess we can add Magnificent Seven to the list of films that didn’t need to be remade but were anyway

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Buddy Cole's Halftime Show

Bill Belichick looks like the guy who takes your bets at OTB and then tries to finger your wife when you go take a pee.

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Covalent Blonde

“Thanks to the hernia my man has from lifting my stupid amounts of rubbish he has some ED problems now…”

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Beastmode Ate My Baby

I heartlessly mock what I call the “limp dick” ads.

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BrettFavresColonoscopy

At least they’ve moved on from separate bathtubs. “Use our dick pill to masturbate next to someone in water.”

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Croooow

Cris is so shamelessly rooting for the Patriots.

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Doktor Zymm

Delay of Game is abbreviated as DOG which is GOD backwards!!!!! COINCIDENCE!?

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Old School Zero

HAIL BLEERGH!

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WCS

GAWD IS OHHN OWAH SIDE NO ONE DENIES THIS

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WCS

YOU CONVERT A THIRD-DOWN AND YOU CONVERT A THIRD-DOWN AND YOU CONVERT A THIRD-DOWN

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Doktor Zymm

Conversation overheard on the plane :
“Fucking Detroit, I hate Matt Stafford he’s such a dick”
“Yeah, yelling at his receivers like that, but what do you expect he’s from Georgia”

I refrained from saying, “Yeah, you gotta yell at your receivers like Marmalard does, that’s LEADERSHIP!”

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BrettFavresColonoscopy

5 yard sacks are usually only found on the cover of National Geographic

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Old School Zero

Oh damn

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Moonbatting Average

That’s a spicy meatball

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Old School Zero

Oh, Frank Lloyd Wright? Neat. Did you know Andrew Luck is an architect, too? Here’s his version of Fallingwater:

http://farm8.staticflickr.com/7435/11898839745_36be273df7_o.gif

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Sharkbait

Fitty is the reason why everyone’s 1A team to win the Superb Owl this year is Arizona when inevitably most of our teams get eliminated right?

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King Hippo

Thursday. Bills. Jets. Somebody has to win!

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WCS

4-4 tie

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Beastmode Ate My Baby

comment image

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Sharkbait

Meteor 2016 makes an early debate appearance.

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BrettFavresColonoscopy

They should lock all the fans in after the game and never let anyone out.

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Buddy Cole's Halftime Show

The gene pool since it’s a Thursday night game in Buffalo.

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Duchess

Ya know guys I am kind of getting tired of Chris Collinsworth talking down to everyone about every bad play.

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Brocky

I don’t think his brain allows him to not be condescending as much as possible

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theeWeeBabySeamus

comment image

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I Will Dye Blonde

Can you post non-Kristen Bell pics… I’m missing Debbie Harry… Wait, no Moose tonight? Damn, maybe he is dead in HRTN.

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Doktor Zymm

Okily, I have eaten of the pizza, I have dranken of the wine, and I have watchethed of the football. Verily, shit be good.

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theeWeeBabySeamus

comment image

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Brocky

So, am I the only one who is kinda hoping NE goes 4-0 without brady? the rest of the AFC east lost today, and we know none of them had a serious chance to begin with, so there’s more long term entertainment value in dissension among the idiotic boston faithful

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Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

I think the Patriots are the one team I really just hate. Maybe they could all get cancer and die slowly

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Brocky

Don’t get me wrong, I hate them to, but I hate them because of sportscasters more than anything else, as opposed to colts and packers fans.

C’mon, short term loss long term gain!

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Shogun Marcus

We know the PAT is 33 yards now. Stahp.

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Croooow

Next thing you’ll tell me is that the yellow line is unofficial.

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Buddy Cole's Halftime Show

33 yards is also the distance Bill Belichick keeps from the nearest minority.

Or so I hear.

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Shogun Marcus

That’s Chip Kelly.

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ThePirateSloth

Was that penalty called “gaping”?

heh

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Doktor Zymm

How many lords a leapin’ are there?

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Old School Zero

Fitty?

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Beastmode Ate My Baby

Twelve…five…three…

AAGH! TOO MUCH PRESSURE

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theeWeeBabySeamus

eleventy billion. ALWAYS go with eleventy billion.

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BrettFavresColonoscopy

Fitty always good to take a shot or nine

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hippofant

My mouth is literally still hanging open from that catch.

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Doktor Zymm

As long as you close it before something flies in there.

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Doktor Zymm

That thar is good footballsing

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makeitsnowondem

CRACKERS FOR FITTY

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Old School Zero

Larry Fitzgerald: Not Dead Yet

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WCS

fitty good

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Sharkbait

Dear liver:

I’m sorry, it’s not my fault. It’s New England’s.

Sincerely,

Sharkbait

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WCS

Cris just admitted to having brain damage. Does that count as self-awareness?

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theeWeeBabySeamus

Sliding scale. For him we’ll call it a win.

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Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

He already forgot he said it.

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Buddy Cole's Halftime Show

It’s like Roethlisberger admitting to “Silly Dick”

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Old School Zero

Has there been a better player with a more generic name than David Johnson?

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Dick E. Phuck

Lawrence Taylor

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theeWeeBabySeamus

Fuck that U*NC pussy. So to speak.

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King Hippo

I think that’s why he lasted so long in the draft

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BrettFavresColonoscopy

Ray Guy?

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Buddy Cole's Halftime Show

Come on, former punter Scott Player?

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Croooow

David Johnson is the man.

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King Hippo

and after he does that circus play, what do they do? Go away from him completely two plays in a row.

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King Hippo

SEE!!!??

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Doktor Zymm

Neat.

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Covalent Blonde

Come on, Pyrrholuxia! Do it!

comment image

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theeWeeBabySeamus

comment image

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theeWeeBabySeamus

Jeebus was a huge duck…little known fact.
http://gifsec.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/03/Ducks-GIFS.gif

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WCS

HAIL BLEERGH

Also, greetings, you miscreants.

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