Your “Please God, Just Let it be Over Already” SNF Open Thread

Whom amongst us isn’t tired of the Broncos?  And a resurgence in Oakland?  Come on Universe!!!!!!

/ducks rotten tomato hurled by Hippo

//nailed by rotten egg hurled by RTD

Yeah, yeah, yeah.  Fine, I get it.  This is a marquee matchup which very well could decide the AFC West outright before is all said and done, or even with tiebreakers.

Ask me if I even care.  Hint:  I don’t.

OK, maybe I care a little, because I am hoping that it won’t be a game in which the suck is so bad that I want to slash my wrists by the 5 minute mark of the 1st quarter.  Not to mention that the meteor still could show up so that’s always something…

Image result for caddyshaCK SO I GOT THAT GOIN FOR ME which is nice gif

Currently, the Broncos and the Raiders are both tied atop the division, along with KC which could barely get past the freaking Jags earlier today.  Jeebus.

Anyway, whomever wins tonight takes a half a game lead for the top spot in the division.  Whomever loses drops a half game into third.  And the whole world will still hate all three of those teams regardless of how it plays out.

Image result for philip rivers gif

Sorry Phil.  SMGDH.

 

Denver @ Oakland

Trevor Siemian has not set the professional footballing world afire necessarily.  But he’s been steady enough to give the Donks a fairly good chance at returning to playing in February.  Which is frankly pretty amazing.  But Derek Carr has been better for the Raiders, but no defense is going to cost them sooner or later.

The big question tonight is can Carr continue his miracle season against Denver’s defense?  I kinda don’t think so.  Time will tell.  If the Silver and Black attack takes care of business tonight, the division is theirs to lose.  Ken Stabler is impressed.  Oh no, wait…he’s dead.

Jim Plunkett is impressed. (Saved It!!!!!!)

Basically, these are two teams on opposite sides of the coin in every way.  But the eye test tells me that Oakland’s offense is not as stout as Denver’s defense.  And that Denver’s crappy offense has a slight edge on Oakland’s crappy defense.

The equalizer might be home field for Oakland.  Vegas sees that equalizer as well, thus Oakland is a -1 fav at home.

Like I said….Go Meteor!!!!!

But failing that, let’s call it…..

30-24…Denver takes over sole possession of the division at 7-2 and further solidifies their playoff picture.

Jerks.

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theeWeeBabySeamus
An unapologetic, even if often manic-depressive (it's a requirement given his choices of sports teams), fan of NC State University, the Baltimore Ravens and the Baltimore Orioles. When not parked in front of the computer and/or TV, can often be found on the golf course shouting obscenities to no one in particular.
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Sharkbait

That was some weaksauce PI there….

King Hippo

play with your fancy-ass camera, it was obvious on the naked eye replay, you dumb chucklefucks, now let us get the embarrassment over with

Brocky

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King Hippo

not even close. FUCK

blackroseMD1

Donks, wtf you doing? It’s the Raiders. STAHP!

Sharkbait

Raiders: Anything you can herp, we can derp better.

Spur

That picture made me think that Madden had died…..I miss Pat Summerall

Brick Meathook

And Tom Brookshire

Sharkbait

M for Matour?

Brick Meathook

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King Hippo

The fuck Kubes accept that penalty fer??

King Hippo

whew, that’s a relief/stay of execution

Spur

Just a reminder, the Texans passed on Carr.

Romonobyl

I know now that I live in Texas. One of the lead stories on the local news is about what to do with extra deer meat. I wish I was kidding, and I live in a larger city.

Spur

You make jerky. What the fuck is wrong with these so-called Tejanos/Texans?

Unsurprised

I’m sorry, but your state needs to be nuked from orbit.

Unsurprised

Damn. If only some intelligent, handsome gentleman would ever get around to making better gifs.

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Spur

Hairspray Live!
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Spur

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LemonJello

A’ight all, the bourble is telling me it’s time for bed.

Should I get some scotch for the end of the world on Tuesday?

Unsurprised

You should have some for every occasion

LemonJello

True. I shall correct that deficiency.

Spur
Unsurprised

Oh good, my totally legal copy of Westworld is available. Later, folks.

Old School Zero

Trevor Siemian never should have quit on his accounting degree.

King Hippo

Does OAK have 15 guys on the field or something??

LemonJello

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Romonobyl

jpegged,,,

Sharkbait

More cider and brandy? Yes. More cider and brandy.

Romonobyl

And then a reading by the Franklin stove sire?

Shogun Marcus

I should think so Smedley. Then a sound rogering before I retire.

Sharkbait

Not gonna lie, I’d like to have one. Or a fireplace.

Spur

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LemonJello

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Unsurprised

Go Trojans

Shogun Marcus

Damn ref! You don’t aim the frag AT the player! How many times you gotta be told?

Shogun Marcus

I found Waldo!
…you see, Waldo is what I call my REDACTED

Brocky

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Old School Zero

Horrible flag. Ball was uncatchable. HAIL BLEERGH!

Sharkbait

Come on safety!

/Sorry Hippo

King Hippo

fuckity fuck fuck

Old School Zero

Touchback? Bullshit.

I vote King to inherit the leg version of the Sex Cannon moniker, because I think his dancing just got us all pregnant.

Sharkbait

Sexy Leg?

Hey baby, we’re kicking it deep?

Senor Weaselo

Something about pinning down?

Spur
Romonobyl

If that was Antonio Cromartie she’d be expecting twins by now.

Gratliff

Fuck me. Trump’s speaking in Michigan. He would feel like 90% less crazy if every thing coming out of his mouth wasn’t hyperbole. It’s not “I’m not racist.” It’s “I’m the least racist person ever.” It’s not “Cities are more dangerous than they should be.” It’s “You can’t walk through a store without getting shot.” He’s trying to cut out the middle man by writing the late night punchlines himself. A true pioneer of vertical integration.

Romonobyl

Got this morning’s MotorWeek recorded (I only recently stopped saying “taped”. I’m almost old enough to vote for Trump, but not Bernie). Cool, a Corvette. Are they still cool?

Shogun Marcus

Much better than they used to be.

King Hippo

also a testament to not drankin’ this evenin

Sharkbait

You sir, have remarkable willpower.

King Hippo

I’m really quite remarkably angry at this point. Tis a testament to how much I’ve generally given up on life how I can keep it inside.

Romonobyl

I slipped off the wagon a bit and picked up a 24 ouncer like I’m all gangsta and shit. I promise not to go full Denzel on Flight though.

Unsurprised

But Denzel got Nadine Velasquez to go full frontal in the very first scene of that movie. He’s a fucking superhero.

Romonobyl

The best part of that entire movie.

Brocky

Got yelled at on facebook cuz of that scene:

cousin’s super religious girlfriend: Ugh had to walk out of that movie for a bit, started off with nudity, really wasn’t expecting that

aunt (who is of course friends with every girlfriend her sons have ever had its a shame, they really don’t make decent non-kids movies anymore.

various inane comments

Brocky so you’re saying the first 5 minutes are worth it alone?

14 notifications later,

its too fucking easy sometimes man…

Brocky

and my grammar appears to be missing a few colons.

thankfully my regular one is still, well,… you know

Brocky

*remembers bears haven’t won a title since 85*

*remembers broncos have won 3 titles sense then*

*clenches fist repeatedly*

Romonobyl

Lost interest in this contest, let’s check the DVR queue!!!

Sharkbait

Safety for the safety gods?

Spur

Am out of beer and it’s only 7:30! Fucking Daylight Savings!

WCS

/has had six gin and tonics at parents’ house
//sees it’s 22:34
///would be happy, but, needs to get up at 06:00

King Hippo

OUR CHILDREN ARE WATCHING, Marquette King ,, smgdh

Sharkbait

Since when do punters dance?

Old School Zero

Since we finally have a good one with some soul in him. Closest we’ve had before were some Australians. Marquette King is my favorite Raider.

Shogun Marcus

Zymms nfc north question leads to a bigger question. Who’s the nfc sacrifice to the (probably) *shudders violently* p*ts in February?
Dallas? Self-implosion imminent, prolly aided by jerrah.
NY? Ugh…that movie sucks despite past results.
Uhh…ideas?

Beastmode Ate My Baby

Vikings?

Shogun Marcus

Unless ap and a new o-line are walking through the door…don’t think so.

Marc Trestmans Windowless Van

It won’t be the Vikings, have you not watched any of their last 3 games? But to answer who will defeat the other redact eds in the playoffs we might need an AFC team to step up.

King Hippo

Detroit!!

Shogun Marcus

Are you made of ALL the oxy?

King Hippo

let’s just say as much as is humanly possible

Sharkbait

cdn1.bostonmagazine.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/10/Simpsons_2717_TheTown_Sc_1026_hires2-e1475602840968.jpg

WCS

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LemonJello

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King Hippo

I don’t have enough oxy to Heath Ledger, but perhaps I should at least try…

Unsurprised

TNF Browns vs. Ravens is going to cause mass suicide and carnage like the masks being exposed to the silver pumpkin in Halloween III

Unsurprised

The fuck? “the network’s coverage of the Tampa Bay vs Atlanta game scored a 2.1 rating in adults 18-49, three tenths higher than last week’s 1.8. The pre and post-game specials scored 0.8 and 0.7 ratings also, keeping in line with the same pattern as the previous weeks.”

http://tvbythenumbers.zap2it.com/daily-ratings/thursday-cable-ratings-november-3-2016/

I HOPE YOU FUCKERS ARE SATISFIED

King Hippo

were you not GET HYPE??