Your “Seattle Doesn’t Care If Stafford Has A Thorn In His Paw” NFC Wildcard Game Open Thread

Det/Sea– Let’s be honest. We’re all pretend friends here, right? Does this not look like a Seahawks win etched in stone? Detroit has lost three in a row. They’re one and done the last eight times they’ve donned cleats for an extra game. Qb Stafford is 1-23 (1 and 23!!!) on the road vs. teams over .500. WOOF! The Lions D is dead last in the rankings despite having the finest living room accessory/head coach in the league. I’d like to see Andy Reid emulate a throw pillow! Grit Monster Zach Zenner is going to give it his best but throwing pearls before swine don’t win football games.

GIVE IT YOUR BEST SENTIENT HUMANS!

0 0 votes
Article Rating
Subscribe
Notify of
694 Comments
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
King Hippo

Across the savanna and NEAR THE 50!!

fleshwound_NPG

CIRCUS GRIT CATCH

Spur

ZZ almost dropped it too!

theeWeeBabySeamus

Nawt a catch.

King Hippo

I hope I never get so old and cynical that I don’t stop to laugh at the sight of a fat man running.

fleshwound_NPG
Shogun Marcus

Couple more weeks…

theeWeeBabySeamus

My favorite song by The Killers, there.
/realizes he has a favorite The Killers song
//kills self

herodotus450

My favorite:
comment image

litre_cola
Spur

There we go Fuck Lions!

Dunstan

The last time the Lions won a road playoff game, Al Michaels was only on his second DUI

Doktor Zymm

LET’S GO FUCK LIONS, LET’S GO *clap clap*

Romonobyl

Speaking of Campari, who’s old enough to remember this?
http://2.media.collegehumor.cvcdn.com/dev/53/81/50e38b2421077beb3b4c06486db57274.jpg

JerBear50

I’ll be so glad when Robertson joins him.

Horatio Cornblower

We actually studied that case in law school.

King Hippo

MIGHTY FUCK LIONS!! ARISE!!!

makeitsnowondem

I GOT A FUCK LION NOW COME FUCK WITH ME

fleshwound_NPG

OH HELL NO WHAT IS THAT WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT

https://twitter.com/_nikkijanee/status/817893874475692034

litre_cola

Oh dear god. Just put some hot sauce on them and they will be fine.

Mr. Ayo

Just needs some mayonnaise for dipping

Brick Meathook

comment image

Curse of Marino
herodotus450

comment image

fleshwound_NPG

“Jimmy Graham…they move him to the inside position”

So, the power forward position?

Mr. Ayo

You mean the 4?

Doktor Zymm

The best thing about Campari…”Oh, you want to try my enticingly red/pink girly drink? By all means, take a LARGE sip.”

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

THIS CAMPARI I CALL IT DAN MARINO CAUSE IT’S BITTER AS FUCK.

Horatio Cornblower

Put this on the banner so Marino can finally win something.

Curse of Marino

+1 THERE WAS NO FUCKING FLUB

litre_cola

I love making Campari drinks, when ordered I know the person loves booze as usually Campari is a mixer to another different alcohol. Pro move.

herodotus450

Business idea: set up an offseason charity basketball tournament, invite all past, current, and future football players. Record games. Now everybody was a former basketball player!

Horatio Cornblower

Dave Atell on Jaegermeister

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hYVuc9YnXwI

Spur

I try to see him in Vegas at least once a year.

King Hippo

one only has to have limited Jager experience to know that all he says is Gospel truth…

Gratliff

comment image

Curse of Marino

I hear that Jimmy Graham used to play basketball.

Horatio Cornblower

The hell you say!

Doktor Zymm

BOSE NOISE CANCELLING HEADPHONES CAN’T CANCEL THE NOISE OF COLLAPSING STEEL BEAMS

Beastmode Ate My Baby

That was a nice reception by Jimmy Graham. I wonder if he ever played any other sports.

King Hippo

seems like a tennis kinda dude

fleshwound_NPG

he’s rebounded quite well since switching sports

litre_cola

Jai alai? No one has ever told me so I am assuming.

King Hippo

That South Florida is a dead giveaway ,, smh

Spur

comment image

King Hippo

I saw him in Raleigh, many years ago. WITH a date. That’s a good weeding-out mechanism.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

So I’m drinking my “end of season” bourbon.

Ah, Basil Hayden. Eases the pain.

Brick Meathook

comment image

Gratliff

Debating between Bill Burr or Dave Attell as a theme
comment image
comment image

Mr. Ayo

Attell!

King Hippo

DAVE ATTELL. Goddamn is that man funny as shit.

JerBear50

That’s a win-win.

Spur

Is Superstore any good? I keep meaning to DVR it but can never remember to.

King Hippo

I noted that NBC done gave Abed a new show, which is nice, but also that it looks like dreck, which is awwww.

Romonobyl

Anyone else binging watching Narcos on Netflix?

Beastmode Ate My Baby

Haven’t watched S2 yet, but the 1st season was very good.

Brocky

its alright

comment image

Curse of Marino

Dan Patrick is such a stuffed shirt.

JerBear50

Yet still the most enjoyable of that group by far.

Mother Puncher

In order to watch football, I have to rub ms. Puncher’s feet. She is currently dressed exactly like Mike Tirico.

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

I first read that as “rum puncher’s feet” because I am a feckless drunk that sees references to alcohol in every facet of life.

herodotus450

comment image

Gratliff

comment image

Curse of Marino

“How can the Lions win?” “Stop letting Rawls do stuff. Also catch balls.” – I can be a football commentator

Curse of Marino

“CATCH OF THE YEAR! JUST IGNORE THE BLATANT UNCALLED OFFENSIVE FACEMASK”

Beerguyrob

“Touchdown Seahawks”, ironically.

LemonJello

Rodney Harrison can die choking on Tony Dungy’s syphilitic dick.

litre_cola

Or just hang himself with it.

Curse of Marino

I’m just gonna wait 5 minutes into the 3rd Quarter before I boot up Netflix and watch Captain America 3.

theeWeeBabySeamus

Translation: Porn

Curse of Marino

Thats for later.

Doktor Zymm

HAHA Illinois Obamacare exchanges ads…sad face…ah shit

King Hippo

it’s ok, decent rudimentary healthcare wouldn’t protect us from the Chinese nukes that are coming anyhoo

Rikki-Tikki-Deadly

Vanessa Hudgens can get it.

Dunstan

That Progressive commercial is pretty lame right up until “laugh harder”

fleshwound_NPG

comment image

Romonobyl

Where did those come from?

LemonJello

The lesser known Progressive “Name Your Size” tool?

Gratliff

“They say she’s a little retarded, but those titties ain’t retarded!” – Dave Attel

King Hippo

Fuck Lions of NOT GETTING SHUT OUT Destiny!!

fleshwound_NPG

Also, the wife bought tickets to see Heart this summer

…which included a backstage meet n greet. I got to be within 2 feet and eye-to-eye with Nancy Wilson.

herodotus450
Brick Meathook

comment image

Curse of Marino

“Bro your stuff is on fire”

“GODDAMNIT I”M NOT GAY AND FLAMER IS A BIGOTED SLU”

“Whoa dude I meant your house is on fire”

“Oh”

“Isnt Olivia home?”

“Aaron Rodgers shrugs*

Brocky

so did we all forget that god hates detroit or….

Romonobyl

Mrs. is watching Enter the Dragon on the cable box machine. Jackie Chan ain’t got shit on Bruce Lee.

Horatio Cornblower

Jackie’s still alive, so there’s that.

Brocky

but so is courtney love…

Curse of Marino

That catch is gonna be replayed all week and all offseason.

Spur

Should have definitely been offsetting penalties. Lions always get fucked…

Horatio Cornblower

Just ask Cecil.

Horatio Cornblower

Hannah Davis, who the I’m only not dating because of the “Derek Jeter stink” mentioned below.

http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2015/11/05/01/2E1E2CB800000578-0-She_sure_knows_how_to_steal_the_spotlight_Hannah_Davis_had_so_mu-a-70_1446685595577.jpg

Well that and my wife’s objections, Hannah’s objections, Derek’s objections and my goddamn attorney’s failure to file a timely objection to that restraining order.

Unsurprised

Goddamn lawyers.

Beerguyrob

It’s a good thing all the boys on “Project Runway Junior” are all gay. I don’t know how that show could deal with emerging manhood.

Brocky

huh, i never knew heart from from the seattle area

Horatio Cornblower

You are probably also unaware that Jerome Bettis hails from Detroit.