NFL news:
- Now that Josh McDaniels has pulled out (hee hee), the favourite for the 49ers head coaching job is Kyle “Not my old man” Shanahan.
- I’m sure the old man has some time for his boy, to advise on how to wreck a rookie QB.
- I’m not alone in thinking this,
- I’m sure the old man has some time for his boy, to advise on how to wreck a rookie QB.
What woud MLK say about the disgusding lack of nepotism in the NFL today? MY COLUMN https://t.co/9wS8Kw4Twn pic.twitter.com/mMRXkfuVvK
— PFT Commenter (@PFTCommenter) January 16, 2017
- Pete Carroll says Richard Sherman played through an MCL injury for much of the season.
- No word on why he wasn’t strapped up during the game, but I guess the playoff heat can melt steel knee braces.
In the “Much Ado About Nothing” department, people are shocked. SHOCKED! that Mike Tomlin used a dirty word about God’s blessed creatures, the New England Patriots.
- It’s not anything they’ve ever been called before.
- “Bulletin Board material” is such bullshit; they know they’re hated, and play like it.
- It’s too bad Gronk’s hurt, because I’m sure he has a “toss my salad” reference in his back pocket for just such an occasion.
- The worse thing is that it proves to his teammates Antonio Brown can’t be trusted on social media.
- “BEN CAN’T KEEP BOTH EYES ON AB AND CHOCO TACO! WHAT TO PICK?!”
- It’s not anything they’ve ever been called before.
Financial news:
Finally, in the “Oh God; yes, please!” department:
- Rob Ryan is interviewing with the [Redacteds] for their open defensive coordinator position.
- Chip Kelly is skulking around the Jaguars, hoping for an opening on the offensive coaching ranks.
Canada 150:
On this date in 1965, the Canada-U.S. Automotive Agreement, known as the “Autopact”, becomes law after being signed by Lester Pearson and Lyndon Johnson.
- It established free trade in North American built automobiles, and helps cement US auto manufacturing in southern Ontario.
- Creating a single North American market for passenger cars, trucks, buses, tires and automotive parts.
- It became a precursor to the negotiations that would eventually form the Canada-US Free Trade Agreement, which ultimately led to NAFTA.
- Importantly, offshore automakers are not part of the agreement, protecting “Big-3” production in Canada.
- Mexican production is excluded, so Trump’s threats actually help Canada, because any shortfall would be picked up via this agreement.
- It binds Canada to adhere to US, rather than European, emissions standards.
- meaning Canada cannot change to more-stringent regulations without amending or violating the agreement.
- political suicide for any Canadian leader
- meaning Canada cannot change to more-stringent regulations without amending or violating the agreement.
- Importantly, offshore automakers are not part of the agreement, protecting “Big-3” production in Canada.
I’m assuming many people saw this over the weekend, from the Scottish Sunday Herald:
Take it as you will. Needs more Silky Garrard.
Tonight’s sports:
- NHL:
- Capitals at Penguins – 7:00PM | NBCSN / Sportsnet
- NBA:
- Cavaliers at Warriors – 8:00PM | TNT / TSN
- Thunder at Clippers – 10:30PM | TNT / TSN
- NCAA: everywhere; ESPNU had high school games until 6:00 ET;
- of note:
- Seton Hall at Villanova – 6:30PM | FS1
- Syracuse at North Carolina – 7:00PM | ESPN
- of note:
- Australian Open – First Round – 9:00PM | ESPN2 / TSN4
- WWE: Monday Night RAW – 8:00PM | USA / Sportsnet360
- the “go home” show before the Royal Rumble on Sunday
- everything, yet nothing, will happen
- Will they honour former Superstar & alleged murderer Jimmy “Superfly” Snuka?
- the “go home” show before the Royal Rumble on Sunday
They should; THEY WON’T!
Maybe it’s because I was in my 20s in the 90s, but my default insane girl song is Alanis Morissette’s You Outta Know.
If you met a girl that liked that song and, even worse, knew the lyrics by heart, you needed to RUN.
RUN FAR. RUN FAST. RUN WIDE.
I am really having trouble finding Trevor Noah funny.
We’ve all known a Lena Dunham. Those of us who are old enough and went to college parties, and halfway through the party, a woman would put the following song on the sound system. She wouldn’t do it to get us to think, or to get us to change our behavior. She would do it to draw attention to herself, and to feel power of ruining 200 other people’s good time. Lena has pulled this specific move at least once in her life, I’m certain.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=anzGhTNwST0
Fucking liberal arts majors.
How did I go to five years of a very liberal college and never have that happen? Oh right, we’re musicians, put a drink in our hand and we’re fine.
No, you aren’t disliked by everyone and shunned by men because you are slightly overweight and try to make yourself look worse in whatever way you can because you are unique. That fat chick over there has 3 guys that might take her home. People hate you because you spread rumors about everyone of the people stupid enough to call themselves your friends to try to impress some guy that won’t ever give you the time of day by playing the victim card. And you are just shitty face to face to anyone that actually tries to be nice to you..
/ What I am saying is I have met this girl
// Based on one person but actually fits a couple girls I knew
http://big.assets.huffingtonpost.com/2014officespace14.gif
http://s2.quickmeme.com/img/f1/f1dfda25d2f143f2b6f3a2f20c9ff3f9a4ef27188496dd43f083736c52e8559b.jpg
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e6QnK0yql8s
I think i’m becoming immune to the effects of Ambien.
This is not good. I don’t have access to a doctor that will prescribe me propofol.
Have you tried getting crunk with your Ambien?
/Note: That’s probably not a good idea
Have not done so. I’m not above mixing drugs, within reason. But I find the chronic is quite variable in regard to how long it takes me to become sleepy and then how long I stay sleepy. By itself, the demon weed is possibly the worst sleep aide available for my system.
Is that Gordon Ramsay’s grandmum?
she is now.
how the heck ya been porky?
In response to Fronkensteen’s post, I can definitively say that, one of the best perks of being a terrific bar back/sometimes server was that every single bartender let me to help myself to whatever liquor I wanted, every shift. This is how I found I can get completely shithoused on gin and tonic, still take care of everything, and not stinky like a rummy.
I had an Irish kid working for me as a barman during my aforementioned South Africa days (and sexy nights!). I’ve never seen someone get so hammered yet still be able to keep control of the bar.
I’m de facto security at the end of the night. All the night managers are female, the building is big and spooky, the parking lot is a creep’s wet dream (TONS of cover and not visible from the main road) so I stay and sip beers while they count the drawer and shut the lights. Everyone goes home in a limo!
Some beers you drink from a perfectly frosted glass in the comfiest chair in your house in front of a game you’ve been wanting to watch all week. Some you sneakily gulp and stash back in the fry freezer while sitting on a pickle bucket because you haven’t had a table come in for two hours. I figure, either way, you’re getting fucked up.
/shrugs
An aquatic mammal … you know … in a residence … That ain’t legal either.
http://www.themarysue.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/04/boatcaptainspacex-320×235.gif
Unless it’s in a rink, or in my drink, ice sucks.
/fucked the rhyme, don’t care, the fact remains.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=szzVlQ653as
Taken… the show? Jesus fuck, television.
What is, in your opinion, the best action movies made in the 21st century? I have some extra time late at night to myself, and I want to watch some great action movies that I may have missed…
And….. go!
2 chicks at the same time!
John Wick.
John Wick was the Payback-Cowboy Bebop lovechild I never knew I needed.
The first couple Bourne movies, Ong-Bak, John Wick,
Predators was pretty damn good. So was Live Free or Die Hard.
I had major trepidation about both going into them, but, they were both really good.
The first Taken movie.
White House Down was pretty good
The Raid
Serenity
Fuck the 21st century. Go old school and watch Bullitt and The Guns of Navarone. Or slightly less old school with The Rock or The Matrix.
Or fine, Kill Bill.
If you never had to work another day, what would you do (other than the obvious office space answers)?
Travel, take up a nasty coke habit, travel, more coke, travel some more, and then more blow.
Travel. I would mix vacationing (sitting on a beach or other locale doing nothing) with travelling (seeing historical sights/learning culture etc).
I’ve been doing the Office Space answer and it fucking sucks. But since I have no hobbies, local friends or family, or really know shit about fuck when it comes to anything, I don’t have the first clue.
Travel, I guess. I want to be someplace warm.
2 chicks at the same time?
Since I have to give my wife half anyway, this seems like an obvious choice I missed.
No, he has NOT done the Office Space answer. If he did, he would be a LOT happier.
Oh, I meant Peter’s answer of doing nothing.
Never did the 2 chicks at once. Had two shots, blew them both because I’m dumb.
Buy mom a condo.
Pay off my brother’s divorce.
Plan two years of sports road trips.
Help the Sally Ann in Vancouver finish their shelter.
Change my answering machine to “Fuck all y’all!”
Race car driver.
The same thing I did for the most wonderful eighteen months of my life when I lived in South Africa: surf all day and spend the evening trying to hook up with gap year girls on vacation.
THIS is a life well lived.
Learn piano.
Pay off college bills and then set up recitals in as many venues as possible. We’ll go touring, whether solo or with the trio, plus my grandfather’s asked if I’d be interested in playing some in Romania. Basically, I’d get to do what I want to do and not worry about the money aspect.
Money isnt an issue?
I’d become a gym rat, learn Spanish and Arabic and get more involved in charity/activist stuff that I couldn’t do now
Tell the NIH to go suck a dick cause I don’t need their fucking grant money any more
Because I’d be funding my own research
Ok, first I would buy myself an Eastern European trophy wife. Then….
Lots of karaoke.
Wait when did the All-Star Game break out in Pittsburgh?
They must have had the goaltending sliders on minimum
I think it was 80s flashback night.
I hate being sick. Send booze.
Hot toddys help.
You too, huh? I’ve had a headache all day.
Who says that Alex Smith is afraid to throw it downfield?
That is fucking pathetic
“F**k it, I’m not throwing it downfield.”
“F*ck downfield, I’m not throwing it.”
Principal: Mr. Goodell, what you’ve just said is one of the most insanely idiotic things I have ever heard. At no point in your rambling, incoherent response were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. Everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it. I award you no points, and may God have mercy on your soul
Came across this over the weekend. I hope it shows up because it’s probably the funniest thing I’ve read — in terms of content and completely hitting me unprepared — since Fuck It! I’m Going Deep!
How is he so good at Twitter?
Well, first you have to be a piece of shit.
Granted, he sort of is one for good, but so the fuck what?
Me thinks by still playing their starters Golden State is giving a huge Fuck You to the Cavs
All of these Jeopardy contestants are failures.
Anyone here have a google home? Is it worth the price tag?
Depends what you want to do with it. If you want to control a lot of things in your house, then yes. If you just want an assistant connected to the Internet, you should get an Echo, which is way cheaper.
I think I’m in love with this girl.
So: F/M/K: Spicegirls edition
Who ya got?
Fuck Toni Basil, marry Marge-oram Simpson, kill Tila salted-rim Tequila
/What, basil is a spice
//so is marjoram
///so is salt
Posh/Ginger/Sporty
As much as I hate Crosby, gotta say I think I hate Malkin even more
C: All of the above?
The Scots have to be some of the funniest motherfuckers on this planet
O.J. is HUNG
Fred Goldman just came upon reading that.
“OJ! They said you was hung.”
“And they was right!”
So:
– they just tributed Jimmy Snuka
– the Rumble is in two weeks.
And, the Caps & Pens are playing a fun one.
This ice football match is wild
Just turned it on. 7-7. Wow.
SPOILER ALERT!
Not surprising a company that gave tribute to Benoit would give tribute to Snuka
There’s the Jimmy Snuka tribute. Ugh.
Did they show a trashy hotel room with some cops slowly closing the door saying, “Nothing to see here?”
“Brother.”
No, but it did get an extremely awkward smattering of applause from the 15000 people watching it live. So that was enjoyable.
One benefit to smark fans.
Question about F/M/K.
Fuck is fuck (once) and kill is kill. Is marry just that you get to marry? Or is it implied that you get to have sex numerous times?
Anyone want to clarify?
I always read it as person you could actually be with for more than one night.
Also, hi.
So would you guys bang Meghan Trainor?
I sure would.
By the way, who’s Meghan Trainor?
I like them a bit thick but honest to god the whole “white chick singing black” is fucking annoying as hell to me.
And that goes double for Australian white chicks rapping Black.
Nah. I’m good
Hey all… how’ve you been? Sorry I’ve been absent for a while. Real life and all that.
Also, regarding Snuka: he’s a monster piece of shit. He treated his remaining fans like shit whenever he was in my local area (an area which also holds the dubious distinction of deciding NOT to try him for that alleged homicide thing you mentioned), and doesn’t deserve to any whitewashing bullshit the WWE will try to get away with to “honor” him. Fuck Snuka.
Hope everything’s okay, dude.
Keeping it wrestling-oriented, here’s Lana attempting to breakdance while Rusev looks on unamused.
https://www.instagram.com/p/BPN3Dg7AA4_/
Let’s talk about a non-domestic murderer wrestling icon making news today. KURT ANGLE AND HIS BROKEN FREAKIN NECK GOING INTO THE HOF!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DhPFQzxhWeY
I am very okay with this.
There is not a team left that I am okay with winning the Superbowl…so with that…I think I am done with the NFL until next season.
Even Atlanta?
“I Guess the Pats Bandwagon Got Bigger”.
Not by one it hasn’t, of this I assure you.
When will a coach or player say “We want to make Tom Brady wish he’d never been born”? You know they’re all thinking it.
/Oh the taeks that would come
Also Brown’s probably gonna get fined, and I’m surprised Ginger Hammer hasn’t suspended him and Tomlin for life yet for speaking ill about the P*ts.
There’s some kind of a Rae Carruth joke to be made here, but I’m too flu-addled to make it work. I guess a Tyreek Hill reference would work too, if you want to be more current.
They may let the Snuka tribute go cold.