TGISF…aka Your “Post-Valentine’s Day Sexy” Sexy Friday Open Thread

So, Valentine’s Day has come and gone.  And you, gentle kommentists, thought you were in the clear.

You did the dinner or the flowers or the candy or the whatever it is your girl loves.  Or maybe you did all those things, you lover boy you.  And your girl was looking at you with that look.  That happy enough that “you’re gonna get the good loving tonight” look.  You done good, son….

 

 

 

 

But don’t break your arm patting yourself on the back…..

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cu1JMbSLPvc

 

Because I’m here to tell you there’s something you’ve overlooked.  Trust me.  A little later, we’re gonna talk about it.

Revenge Sports

Baseball’s almost baaaaaccckkkkk.  Pitchers and Catchers are already in, position players will trickle in this weekend.  My 2nd annual shitty prediction post will be upcoming in a few weeks, no doubt.  Cubs and Red Sox fans will love me.  Which is great because there’s nothing I love more than making those two fanbases happy.

College Baseball actually kicks off THIS weekend for many teams.  My team’s home opener isn’t until next weekend tho.  Jerks open up in Hawaii this week and didn’t take me.  Dumb stupid heads.

The NHL is mostly unchanged since last week, if I’m being honest.  Big game tonight between the Pens and the Jackets tho (7pm NHL Network), with only two points currently separating the two for 2nd place in the Metro, 5 pts off the pace of the Caps.

Otherwise it’s a very light NHL Slate tonight.

The NBA is what it is.  I might watch some in May.  I have no interest until it’s down to the Cavs/Celts and Warriors/Spurs.  And I’ll have only marginally more interest then probably.

Why are they even still playing the regular season?  Oh, that’s right.

Even Lighter NBA Slate….

That’s because it’s All-Star Weekend!!!!!!!!!!

NBA All-Star Game – East vs West

Inspired by the work of makeitsnow, this is a piece of semi-original art by tWBS.

Yup, one more notch for Pat McCrory.  Nice job, fucktard.

Tipoff: Sunday, February 19th, 8pm

TV: TNT

I really don’t know or care who’s playing, but if you care you can find out here.

NBA All-Star Weekend 2017 Predictions: Will Klay Thompson defend 3-point crown? (CBSSports.com)

Meh…can’t say I rightfully give a shit.

And in college basketball, the ACC will have at least one new coach next year.  Thank Christ.

Mark, if you need help packing, or an extra pickup to get you out of town quicker, just holla’.

Post-Valentine’s Day Vengeance

It’s all in the title, folks.

Sooooooooo…..tell me.  What did you overlook?  Why should you be worried right now?

I’ll tell you why…. Because you’re a stupid guy who doesn’t know shit about shit when it comes to women.  Go look at those pictures up there again, only this time with the assumption you’ve fucked up and you’re gonna pay….eventually….

See what I mean?

Look, I know many of you think your girl is/was happy with your V-Day efforts.  And some probably really are.  But trust me, some are not.  And some of you (you know who you are) totally tanked it and already know she’s gunning for you.

And that’s not even the worst part.  Those situations can be somewhat predicted and/or mitigated.  Or if all else fails…avoided (see ya in a couple weeks hon, I’m headed to Alaska to help tag water buffalo).  No no, the worst part is all the girls out there who didn’t have boyfriends/dates for Valentine’s Day.  They my friends, are the unpredictable X-factor this weekend.

But take heart because there could be a payoff if you’re also single yourself….

For you guys who are NOT single, go home right now and do something nice for YOUR gal in case she’s pissed.  Hint:  If she looks like this she probably is….

So how does one spot the Post-Valentine’s Anger?  Well, it’s really nothing new.  You’ve been seeing it since you were in grade school.  You just never noticed (or cared) because you’re a guy.  But remember this young lady?  The one who sat behind you in fourth grade who didn’t get a Valentine from you and proceeded to kick your chair all day every day for 2 weeks?

Well, she grew up to be this girl, who now lives 3 doors down from you….

She also now owns a car and has a SHITLOAD more estrogen coursing thru her veins….

So as you can see, it’s important to not only spot her, but to know what type she is.

Type?

Yes, type.

Is she a Screamer?  This we can live with.

Same with the Screamer/Gesturer.  No imminent risk, just walk away.

The Hitter is to be respected, but really all ya gotta do is stay more than four feet away and be ready to move just in case….

But the Thrower, on the other hand, while not one to necessarily fear per se…..well, let’s just say don’t turn your back on her and back away slowly….

But weapons change the game.  As is true with so many things, I suppose.

The Stabber is serious business of course, but really the defense is just Hitter/Thrower combined.  Keep your distance and don’t turn your back.

Which brings us to the Shooter.  Now you don’t need me to tell you that if this is your view….

You’re pretty much dead already.  But at least that’s the last thing you’ll see.  You can go to your grave knowing that others have done worse.

But if you’ve got some distance (and also are not trapped in a hallway choke point, of course), you’ve got a shot.  In such a scenario, I do highly recommend the Babou defense until you find some cover….

 

It’s important to remember that where a girl lands on the scale between Screamer and Shooter depends upon a great many factors.  Said level also frequently escalates, but rarely de-escalates.  This seems simple enough, but it is important.  If she pulled a knife on you once…..

Also….If it’s YOUR girl coming at you with weapons, my guess is either you’ve really fucked up or she’s crazy.  Or both.  Knowing you guys, almost definitely both.

Also very important to remember is that weapons can be hidden…

So if in doubt, frisk yo’ girl and act like it’s foreplay (and who knows?  Maybe it is).

Angry Sexy

So if you’re out and about this weekend and you encounter a girl who looks like these, be wary of your surroundings on par with the above scale.  Watch for weapons, of course.

But if YOUR girl looks like THESE….????

Goddammit Barry, that’s not funny. I’m trynna work here….go home and enjoy private life and quit fucking with me…..

Where was I?  Oh yeah….if YOUR girl is pissed at you?

Talk to her.

Trust me, she wants you to talk to her.  And if you ever want to see this again….

And if you don’t want Easter to look like this…..

Yeah, but….

Just keep trying…..Because you want this next Christmas…..

 

Not this….

 

If all else fails and she won’t talk to you, suggest Sexy Boxing.

Fantasy

 

Reality

(meh, it was worth a shot)

((at least now she’s laughing))

This week’s tWBS original is a very special selection.  Firstly, I love the Moon, and photograph it often, trying to get better at doing so.  But truth be told, it’s rare that I get a shot of the Moon that I find remarkable in one way or another.  Seen one Moon Pic (no not that kind) seen ’em all.

But occasionally, circumstance/timing and weather can change that.  Anywhoo, captured on a cold January night in ’15, it’s a little over two years old.

It’s entitled -Mama Quilla- which is significant both to this entry (LOL) as well as to something which will be upcoming (I hope) from Mr. ballsofsteelandfury and myself…though only he’ll get that joke for now.  But I give you the Incan Moon Goddess of Female Menstrual Cycles…..sooooooo…..WOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!

 

– Mama Quilla –

*Additional special hat tip to Mr. balls for his suggestion for this week’s TGISF theme.  I was floundering for some reason or another this week.  😉

Hmmmm, I haven’t given you any depressing music to listen to yet, have I?  That can’t be right, can it?  Well, you’re not getting any, either.  Time to be happy whether we like it or not….

So…..suck it.

Have a good weekend, folks.

Love ya’s

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theeWeeBabySeamus
An unapologetic, even if often manic-depressive (it's a requirement given his choices of sports teams), fan of NC State University, the Baltimore Ravens and the Baltimore Orioles. When not parked in front of the computer and/or TV, can often be found on the golf course shouting obscenities to no one in particular.
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Brick Meathook

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Unsurprised

Those words don’t go together.

WCS

This one of the funniest things I’ve read on this site this week.

Unsurprised
Senor Weaselo

Another remake of The Longest Yard?

Unsurprised

It looks more like someone took the opening scene of The Last Boy Scout and built a movie around it.

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Brocky

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Brocky

oh man, I know the scene but I can’t remember the name.

the one with the evil ice cream right?

entropy

The Stuff!

Brocky

that’s the one, gracias!!!

Unsurprised
Brick Meathook

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Unsurprised

Metal as fuck.

entropy

Best line from this week’s “The Expanse:”

“Me crush ass to dust, bumpah!”

Brick Meathook

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entropy

Sweet, sexy ankles…..

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Brick Meathook

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Brocky

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
entropy

Moar Angelica Celaya, because she is FINE:

http://media2.whosaystatic.com/626353/626353_800wc.jpg

Unsurprised

Watching Buddy Cole is making me feel better.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DJ4oMe5bPIw

Brick Meathook

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Brick Meathook

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Brick Meathook

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Senor Weaselo

I just thought of a new genre called sumo rock. It’s just sumo wrestlers stomping around like getting into a sumo stance. And also playing instruments. They’ll sell ones of records! Maybe even severals!

Unsurprised

Hakah Rock

Low Commander of the Super Soldiers

What’s that? My roof is still leaking after I was promised that it would have been fixed two weeks ago? Oh, well, it’s about time you talked to my representative.

http://i8.glitter-graphics.org/pub/678/678198ofmyfss20w.jpg

BOLTMAN KNOWS LITTLE ABOUT ROOF REPAIR, BUT BOLTMAN KNOWS A LOT ABOUT HOW THE HUMAN CIRCULATORY SYSTEM FUNCTIONS, AND HOW DIFFICULT THAT CAN BE TO CLEAN OUT OF AN XXL JERSEY! OHHHH YEEEAAAHHHH!

Brocky

Scratch what I said earlier, I did solve that mystery

the joke was how long I went without knowing

Low Commander of the Super Soldiers

He is just some dude, possessed by the ROCKEN-IST, SHOCKEN-IST OLD ONE THIS SIDE OF YUGGOTH!

Low Commander of the Super Soldiers

I’m just glad you learned something today.

entropy

OK. No more depressing politics bullshit. I’ve been rewatching Constantine, and I forgot how fuckin hot Angelica Celaya is:

http://www3.pictures.zimbio.com/gi/Angelica+Celaya+Billboard+Latin+Music+Awards+1psdXjT6gBvl.jpg

Brocky

RIP George the Animal Steele, Lighting shit on fire in heaven now

http://s.mlkshk-cdn.com/r/20K8

entropy

Chewing turnbuckles for the LORD!

Brocky
Unsurprised

Is that what you call them?

Brocky

Turnbuckle pad I guess, because I think a turnbuckle can be any kind of tension joint that tightens by twisting.

but yeah that’s the commonly accepted name.

Unsurprised

I was trying to make a cunnilingus joke.

Brocky

hey man, ain’t no joke, that causes cancer

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Brick Meathook

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Unsurprised
Unsurprised

Who wouldn’t do that?

Brocky

trump supporters would say they wouldn’t, because you know….lying

Unsurprised

Just like no masters ever raped their slaves

Brocky

“U can’t rape Property!

actually uncle steve, this fine gentleman from the state troopers says you can, so he’s gonna have to take you in for what you did to your sheep there.

Unsurprised
entropy

Fun fact: the brunette, Kate Micucci is from a little town to the North of where I live… and would probably not be welcomed there just for the contents of this video.

Unsurprised

Fun Fact, she has a sex scene with Malin Akerman, the hot blonde from Watchmen.

Unsurprised

The worst part about being alone is that it’s so easy to lose perspective. It’s nearly impossible to be pleasantly surprised or even just delighted by something or someone just because.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CY0Qjx5K53o

entropy

In case you felt the need to read about the responses to Shep Smith’s once-a-decade conscience attack: don’t. You’ll be a LOT happier that way.

WCS

That would involve going to foxnews.com, so nah, I’ll pass.

entropy

Not Shep’s actual statement, the responses to said statement. I keep wondering just how crazy people can get, and I am somehow surprised to find there is no bottom to this well.

WCS

No, I completely understand your original statement. I find myself much healthier if I avoid anything Fox News related.

entropy

Gotcha. I’m getting more and more depressed, because sooner or later, this madman is gonna get impeached, and then we’ll have The Electric Kool-Aid Acid Pence in charge, and shit will be not only evil, but truly weird, as well.

Unsurprised

Nah. We’ll all get killed because these fucking assholes are too stupid to manage a lemonade stand. They’ll mishandle the first global or domestic crisis that hits us so badly we will all be dead. If we’re lucky.

From the Former Director of US Foreign Disaster Assistance:
https://twitter.com/JeremyKonyndyk/status/832616259598610432

But, hey, MEMES!
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Unsurprised

Humanity is too sick to survive.

Senor Weaselo

How strong are the taeks?

WCS

I am definitely getting too drunk for this time o’ night.

Brocky

Evening…..

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GLOVES!!!!

Get it?

Brocky

all good man, but let us not forget our patriot saint of sexy glove wearing…

http://cdn.resharelist.com/media/sexy-kate-upton-pictures-051.jpg

Senor Weaselo

Oh, I bet the list isn’t that long… hey where’d you get a 4-foot parchment scroll?

Brick Meathook

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WCS
Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Senor Weaselo

I’ll take a spiky bat, thank you.

Senor Weaselo

No front flips by the pool!

Unsurprised
entropy

Hey all. Happy Friday and such.

Brick Meathook

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Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Unsurprised
Unsurprised
Brick Meathook

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laserguru

“I’m telling you now…”

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh
Unsurprised

Wu-Tang ain’t nothing to fuck with.

Brick Meathook

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Unsurprised
Beerguyrob

This will be funny forever.

Unsurprised

I feel terrible.

ballsofsteelandfury

Is it?

A) stomach
B) headache
C) diarrhea
D) depression

Unsurprised

Depression

ballsofsteelandfury

I find that posting pictures of beautiful girls helps.

Unsurprised

It usually makes it worse for me.

ballsofsteelandfury

E) ennui
F) existential angst
G) you screwed someone over
H) OWIE IN OUCH SPOT

ballsofsteelandfury

The thing i love about the new AFL Watch package is that you get Australian commercials. Those are fun just by themselves.

Unsurprised
laserguru

Greetings folks!

Just wanted to give a weather warning.

We’re getting the piss knocked out of us by a storm and it’s heading East.

It’s an angry motherfucker.

You’re welcome.

ballsofsteelandfury

I’m safely inside in my warm bed watching AFL. The storm can lick my taint.