NFL News:
- Zach Orr is coming out of retirement, after being told by doctors that his congenital spinal condition is not as bad as first feared.
- His risk as been downgraded to “just like anyone else who plays that position”.
- Luckily, he has a crack medical team behind him.
- The Eagles are also giving LeGarrette Blount a weight incentive.
- I guess because he no longer fears the capricious hand of a vindictive
mastercoach.
- I guess because he no longer fears the capricious hand of a vindictive
- Drew Brees is tired of all those fat kids in his jersey, so he started a flag football league.
- It’s a co-ed youth flag football enterprise called the Football ‘N’ America League.
- It’s also a way to get kids into the game without contact at an early age.
Well, I’m off on vacation. I got my wife Adele tickets for Christmas, and the concert is at Wembley on July 2. (I had to do something – she caught me on the internet at 2:00AM; I said it was ordering tickets, because why else would I be constantly hitting refresh?) The Canadian embassy is hosting a party in Trafalgar Square on July 1, so I’ll be hitting that.
After that, it’s off to Italy to meet up with my brother & his wife, for a week in Tuscany at the villa he’s rented.
After that, down to Rome for a couple of days before flying home. It’ll be like I’m my own Gothic invasion!
The hardest part of the whole thing has been convincing the mothers that, despite the recent news, we are going to be fine. My “If they didn’t lock up every guy named Seamus in the 80s, they’re not worried about guys named Ahmed in the 21st Century,” didn’t change their minds but did let them know I heard what they said. At least my mother-in-law is staying at the house to look after the dog, so that’s a comfort. To be safe, I’ve moved the porn & good booze to the crawl space in case the rest of the family visits.
See you in mid-July, unless I get blowed up.
The volunteers filling this space will likely make you wish I’d never return.
Tonight’s sports: Curse Cthulhu, there’s not even a national baseball game tonight. (In America.)
- Beisbol:
- Orioles at Blue Jays – 7:00PM | Sportsnet
- Dodgers at Angels – 10:00PM | Sportsnet1
- Futbol:
- U.S. Open Cup Soccer 2017:
- FC Cincinnati vs. Chicago – 8:00PM | ESPN2
- U.S. Open Cup Soccer 2017:
See you in a couple of weeks. Until then, this Saturday
HAPPY CANADA DAY!
Training for The Wheelchair Assassins of Southern Québec
Did he flip off the engineer at the end?
Is that zone 7?
Evening lizard people. Generous pours of free wine at a rooftop overlooking the city is a wonderful thing, but I think I am the wine version of bourble though not enough to hurl on the train. I hope.
Wine drunk is a good drunk
Is that Markie Post?
Yes.
http://farm5.static.flickr.com/4118/4778303640_8884ef01c8.jpg
Sounds like a great way to spend a Wednesday night.
Somebody’s gotta go back and get a shit load of handcuffs!
Howdy neighbors!
Who’s got two thumbs and..
Wait a second…
/removes left thumb from asshole
Who’s got two thumbs and tickets, flights and rooms to see the Vikings at Birdmurderdome against the Elite Flaccos in October?
This motherfucker!
Let’s go to the frozen wastelands and rape and pillage and drink and.
Well we’re gonna drink.
Bullee dat!
Road trip and Boots on the Ground in October.
Hell yes!
It’s around my birthday too!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sv0XGMCeU-I
h
ttp://caught.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/01/hot-dance-gif.gif
yea!!
*ahem*
Ma’am.
Where are the handcuffs when you need them?
Probably still dirty from last time
Needs moar Earl Weaver.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0J170GnvF8U
Sometimes I kind of wish the book of Revelations would come true asap so all this religious right assholes would have to watch as they get left behind.
http://anythinghorror.files.wordpress.com/2013/10/jecrcf4.jpg
Fuck it, I give up. That’s the fourth pic I re-posted that still isn’t showing.
Needs to be a .jpg, .png, etc.
That said; I am also having trouble. Must be Venezuelan hacking.
Don’t forget the s
Oh, after the http? I wasn’t aware that made a difference. Any idea why it’s not in there when I copy the image address?
No clue. Just check when copying here.
http://i.imgur.com/Ktctbho.gif
Hi
The Portland Thorns walloped FC Kansas City 3–0. This is good.
Woah, these are real teams. And there’s apparently professional women’s soccer teams. And this is a real result.
According to all twelve people who watched.
(There were many thousand leaving the stadium as I walked past)
((Also, I was at the sold-out game last week vs. Seattle. It was also part of the Pride celebration, which I’m sure you can imagine had zero overlap with the fans of professional women’s sports.))
(((hehehe)))
You sat through a women’s soccer match AND you had no chance of getting laid from it? I’m not sure if that’s admirable or a serious character flaw.
They didn’t take a liking to his snatch.
It was free food and I got to hang out with other lawyers practically on the field.
Oh, well clearly I didn’t realize that you also got to hang out with lawyers. You sure buried the lede on that one. Now I get it completely.
Mornin.
Gothic Invasion is what I call it when I hook up with a rockabilly chick.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aTqN2nCHilc
This definitely inspires me…to go get more whiskey.
Then my work here is done.
Also “Fuck you.” Well, maybe that is just implied in some cases of “Good morning.”
“didn’t change their minds but did let them know I heard what they said.” That’ll get ya on the Son Hall of Fame. Hope you and Mrs. Guyrob gave a great trip. When in Rome,
Is there a less attractive fictitious love interest than Olyve Oyl?
You may be on to something.
I have an Uedipus complex
Well, you know what they say…
I mean, yes, I know it’s the Padres, but is it really too much to ask to have the only local team left on at the local dive bar? I’ve asked three times, and at this point this is the only answer I’ll accept:
A Cincinnati sports team won a high profile game on prime time cable TV?
What is the expected reaction? Its been so long; I forgot how to respond to success.
Drink happily, as opposed to, you know…
http://junkee.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/08/Steve-Buscemi-Sobbing-and-Drinking-Reaction-Gif.gif
Grandpa looks a lot younger since he got that little fuck robot.
Erin Gray made strange and wonderful things happen in young Spanky’s pants.
She DOMINATED the TV camel toe category for years.
http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-9GUxDcau3YM/VoiWOmZ8XUI/AAAAAAABspU/ywMd9OBA73U/s1600/Erin_Gray_sexy.girl.photos.filminspector.com_17.gif
Why is Big Bang Theory?
http://generated.inspirobot.me/049/aXm1673xjU.jpg
Stupid sexy ‘s’….
I image searched that and I don’t think several of the pictures that popped up are actually from the show……
This last season of Sherlock is fucked.
Yup. The end is underwhelming. I hope there’s another season to wrap it better.
Just got around to checking my lottery ticket.
I didn’t win. So I guess i still gotta put up with you assholes a while longer.
That’s my default signature on my work email.
Hehe
Where’d you get a picture of my prom date?
Wow. I can’t remember the last time I heard Cincinnati Sports Fans this excited and the score is 0-0. If Bengals-Bears was 0-0 in the 4th Quarter, the fans would be asleep in the stands.
In case you’ve ever wondered why bad things happened to the Bengals…
http://www.cincinnati.com/videos/sports/nfl/bengals/2017/06/28/bengals-50-curse-bo-jackson/103241312/
Not the reason I had in mind, but whatever.
Methinks the whole…”Mike Brown is team owner” is a far more likely reason for all the years of ineptitude.
Paul Brown passed on Bill Walsh as Head Coach. The beta West Coast Offense was done in the early 70s Bengals.
Its runs in the blood.
How long before the self-inflicted shotgun blast to the face was this?
I’m not saying there’s a connection or anything, but…..Charles looks awfully happy.
No idea. When was Nirvana on SNL?
No idea. I was usually high back then.
/lol’s at “back then”
September 1993, so about six months before he woke up sober, realized he was married to Courtney Love and did the only reasonable thing to do in that situation.
Courtney Love takes too much flak I think. I mean compared to any male rock and roll star, doing the same shit, people wouldn’t freak out as much.
Plus I think people tend to forget that she had a lot of talent before drugs and shit took their toll.
Mick Jagger is every bit as reprehensible as a person as Courtney Love…and people never give him shit.
Now granted, Jagger has a lot success, but I would argue that fucker has sold out WAY more…
I agree with you that Jagger deserves a lot more shit than he gets. As for Courtney…Hole was great, but there’s some mystery around how much the music actually had to do with her. There’s at least one Nirvana song (Old Age) that she took for Hole after Kurt died, and Billy Corgan (yeah, I know) wrote a few solo songs for her.
She was one hell of a frontwoman when she got on stage though, I’ll give her that.
https://youtube.com/watch?v=dxiLXiWRqQs
John Popper has bigger tits tho.
Yeah…this bot is insane…
I’m thoroughly inspired now.
I think I would prefer my son coming to me and saying he wanted to be a crack addicted, male prostitute than attempt to play college and pro football.
Health long term wise…that has to be better right?
College athlete just outta school and male prostitute will have the same health care plan soon.
I was really surprised when I got to the fleet, but at least in the nuke arena, it seemed like at least 1/3rd to half of my coworkers were ex-college athletes that got hurt and then were quickly cut. So then ended up in the military because they had zero chance of securing employment, education, and even the most basic medical coverage.
https://youtube.com/watch?v=JF1chLj1fro
Dispatch from the front STOP City named after a lord, state named after a king STOP And they call themselves true Americans STOP Been accosted by numerous transsexuals in every lavatory STOP I guess they were right all along STOP
Before the yelling…..
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uHkvD7-u7y8&ab_channel=RonTunning
This might’ve been posted already, but I just saw that Gronk roasted David Ortiz for the first time earlier today and further endeared himself to Boston by making some really dumb racist jokes, including the definition of an anti-Semitic Dad Joke that he probably tells Edelman twice a day during practice.
https://www.boston.com/sports/boston-red-sox/2017/06/22/watch-rob-gronkowski-and-dustin-pedroia-roast-david-ortiz
You can only skip so much of the bloviating, but I suggest you jump a little past the minute mark to avoid the worst of it.
So there’s an AI that was made to generate random inspirational quotes over serene pictures…and it’s apparently gone completely insane.
I’ve spent the past 20 minutes generating random stuff like this:
inspirobot.me
I can’t tell if it’s more Emmitt Smith or more Trent Green.
Just looked at my friends fiancee and told her that I personally rank all weddings on how nice the chair covers are. She told me to get fucked. I then retorted with “tell me about the top 5 then”.
She left, angry but I think I saved him some money!
smh i bet they dont even match the centerpieces…
We can still ask that every guy named Seamus is locked up now though, right?
Someday they’ll read my letter and DO SOMETHING!
Ahmed? I thought his name was Rob.
Like my coworker Dave. Dave was born in Beijing. Dave was told by canadian immigration that he looked like a Dave. So his Canadian passport says Dave Yu.
I wanna post a photo of my truck now, but I’m too lazy to go hunt it down on the server.
[insert photo of Dave the truck here]