Woof! So many delightful games! (I wrote this around noon-I have no idea) Here’s a preview of another NFC Championship Game. I can hear the wailing and gnashing of teeth from Cowboys fans near and far. And yes, they have a point. We’ll see how things shake out over the course of the season. TO THE GAME!
Packers/Falcons: Green Bay corners House, Rollins and Randall will draw straws to see who gets the honour of covering the most physically dominant wr in the game today (RIP Megatron) Hey, didn’t you think that Calvin Johnson was going to ‘retire’ the one year and come back? I’d have lost the house on that one I was so sure. Where are we? The Pack also has something called a “Nitro” package whereby they throw 6 db’s on to the field at one time-I’m curious to see that. Rodgers has done his part the last two games vs. Atlanta-he’s got a 7-1 TD/Int ratio and over 100 yards rushing. Between the ankle problem and coming down with the flu, the player whose name makes me giggle like a four year-old-Bryan Bulaga-may not suit up tonight. Look, I know in my heart of hearts he’s not a Beluga whale but some small part of me thinks that. When they start ascribing human characteristics to the guy I just lose it. Man, I’ve really lost the thread here.
Okay. Worst. Game. Preview. Ever. In my defense, I’m more alcohol than man at this point. Enjoy the festivities and comment like the unrepentant bastards that I know you are.
Beep Beep, dudes!
I came to expect more from Rick & Morty. Oh well, it was still interesting.
I thought buying a ticket on StubHub for a game at StubHub Center was inter-dimensional, but today I bought a ticket from a scalper in front of StubHub Center. That’s like the unified field theory of ticket buying.
GREGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG pencils this in the NOTEBOOK
Where’d you get 2,640-1, Al? And did you have any action on it?
That’s just his BAC.
OK, time to go get high and watch TV with the cat.
None of which is a euphemism.
Does the cat get high?
Would it really make a difference?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ERm_WNxGs1U
FIF
Probably would make a difference to the cat.
“And now, Matt Ryan can milk it for all it’s worth.”
Aaron Rodgers: *sigh*
Just in time to switch to Rick & Morty
I can’t watch that tired. I waits for Monday.
I don’t particularly feel the need to watch the rest of this game. Good night all!
Later.
problem w/ GB doing a Sherman’s March is they can’t force a stop
SVU is still a thing?
HollywoodAmericans loves rape.Ha! Aaron HAS TO throw to Adams now.
I actually know a bunch of people that went to UCF. They’re all crazy.
Same.
Same.
Stop, he’s already dead.
“I don’t know, I think the dead guy won the fight.” -The Canelo-GGG judge
The Donger Need Food.
A refreshing change of pace from the folks at Westboro
“Trent Green got hurt?!”
~Trent Green
Aw yeah. Sean Spicer out there getting his comeuppance.
BARTENDER NEEDS TO CUT HER OFF.
Celebrities are lining up for pictures with the miserable little fuck. This is our reality. I want to hate fuck his eye socket with the eye still in it.
Are we sure they know it’s actually him, and not the SNL version of him?
Ha! Nice.
That’s why I was attempting to make a joke.
“Wait ’til they get a load of me. Which they will, when I shove my butt in their face while they’re in bed.”
Rams vs 49ers in prime time is like punching your girlfriend just to see if she’ll come back.
I thought that would be Ravens-Bengals.
“And the answer is YES” – Multiple locker room/front office voices
No, Ravens-Bengals is punching and hoping she doesn’t come back BUT ALSO THAT BITCH BETTER NOT TALK GODDAMMIT SECURITY VIDEO????
THE GAME WILL STAB YOU IN YOUR SLEEP?
The suicide hotline will be extra busy this Thursday night.
I’ve been on my mobile since thurs night. Don’t entirely know how my fantasy roster is set — but know I had a couple guys have monster/disaster games — or how the points sit but I know I have an opponent who I know NOTHING ABOUT.
It’s s crazy feeling to know you have no control over this, the outcome is ultimately unimportant but still you’re both excited and calmly accepting of what the results will be when this is all revealed in its own due time.
This right here is the meaning of life.
Interestingly, that is also Norv Turner’s coaching philosophy
Am I the only one that can’t do yoga classes because I get an erection?
just self-harm right before
That makes it even more of a problem though.
YOGA PANTS WET SPORT WARNING!
YOGA PANTS WET SPORT WARNING!
YOGA PANTS WET SPORT WARNING!
or spot, whatever.
I’ve heard Caitlyn Jenner and Chelsea Manning have the same problem…
And why exactly can’t you do yoga with an erection?
I’m not sure I understand the problem.
No. Half the class has stopped going because you keep getting erections.
THAT WAS NIIIICE.
So everyone just saw the nationally-televised dick joke commercial, right?
We have ads?
How the fuck is there still 1 quarter left???
Vengeful God?
Toyota just used the John Cena theme to hawk the Camry. If you excuse me, I think I need to sell my Corolla now.
Toyota has perfected “You Can’t See Me” technology.
Isn’t that the opposite of what they should be doing?
I want my flying car, dammit. Marty McFly said I’d have one by now.
Also; go Broncos.
Arso; go Bloncos.
FTFY
I shoulda seen that one coming.
LOL. Sorry, had to.
“It is youl duty.”
-The Ghost of Hines Wald
Collinsworth: This is what Atlanta can do. They can run up a big lead and then grind you down.
THE REST OF THE GODDAMN WORLD: 28-3
How do these dudes not hear themselves?
Its hard to hear yourself speak when your head’s up your own ass.
Ook ook!
OOK?
Did you know that in the 60s-70s, comics with gorillas on the cover sold at a markedly higher rate, and so DC’s editor-in-chief eventually had to put a cap on how many covers could have apes on the cover each month.
Crazy! I don’t get comics at all. Even tried to get into them as a kid but never took. Love the idea. Love the stories I do hear about. Something it sounds like a pretty fun subculture to be s part of.
Just never got into comics.
Better to be comic fan adjacent so they can tell you what few comics are actually worth looking at
Gorilla Grodd I do believe!
See! Harambe deserved to be killed!
All right everyone, dicks back in.
Wait a fuck…Cincinnati comes to gb next week.
Cincy looking at kaep.
Gb is where all this kneeling mess started if I’m not mistaken…
SHEEPLE WE ARE THROUGH THE LOOKING GLASS!
That was really fucking funny. One of the best through the looking glass I’ve ever read.
Yes, but bad things have a tendency to happen when Cincy goes to Green Bay
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y-Wf7SHmgOE
HEHEHEHE I’M THE KICK PERSON NOW
Folks
And this is why we leave Trump alone.
I like literally every other person on that list more. I fucking hate that show and everything about its fans.
It’s just incredible to see who else was nominated. There’s real talent in those lists and yet it’s CBS’s lowest common denominator crap winning.
This is like a beer festival where Blue Moon wins every goddamned year just because it’s the peak of most folks’ preference.
Not even most folk — like, Mormon people are the judges.
“And for the 20th year in a row, the award for Best Ale goes to Flat Diet Ginger!”
But, it’s such SMART comedy! You can tell because they make a reference to quantum mechanics in between BAZINGAs!
Was looking for a good twitchin Ren Hoek pic, but stumbled across the incredibly questionable cap from Pokemon.
Holy shit. That fap warning is amazing.
http://uncyclopedia.wikia.com/wiki/File:James_breasts.jpg
What? He didn’t win in ’12 for Werewolf Transformations????? I demand a recount you cheating bastards.
Maybe Don Cheadle will cut him.
blech
Oh damn. That’s hot.
So I’m a month in to running on an eliptical for 30 mins every other day and I’ve hated every moment of it. At what point do I not want to kill myself? Is it really worth it? Is death so much worse?
Never.
Yes.
It depends.
You got bum knees or something?
I recommend upping to 4-5 days a week and a little intensity never hurts. It’s amazing the noticeable improvements you’ll experience and that should make it more bearable.
Actually, intensity may be why I don’t get as much out of it as I should. I crank the shit out of resistance and probably lose a lot of cardio in the process.
Mix up your cardiovascular workouts.
Zone out to music and feel what your body is doing.
Mostly sweating and telling me I’m an idiot for doing this. My body makes good points.
Do you have a pulse monitor/ recorder? That way you can bank your improvements.
It’ll always be boring and unpleasant as shit. Gotta find some way to do it while also distracting yourself. I do tennis or small group classes. Yoga doesn’t suck but isn’t super cardioish unless you’re doing a fast paced Vinyasa class
I did yoga in college to knock out that pesky PE credit during my last semester there where I was the only male in a class of 30. Was easier to get motivated for it back then, but I never kept it up after the class. The meditation techniques are the only thing that really stuck. Teacher was a hippy of the highest order
remember the most important part:
Go intervals. I throw on my little iPod shuffle and go one song at a moderate pace, one song fast and alternate back and forth on the treadmill.
1) Get a mid or back row eliptical.
2) Hope you have a good gym where attractive women workout
3) Enjoy the show
1) Go to the back row
2) Hope you go when attractive women work out
3) Enjoy the view
But the answer mostly is no.
For anyone watching The Orville – I once got the guy who plays LaMarr to go all-in against me after I flopped a royal flush.
Long story short, that’s how Rikki will get royalty checks for The Orville!
He’ll be getting 7 cents a month all the way to 2021!!
What ‘lister’ are you exactly?
So I can tell people I dickjoke blog with such a level celebrity.
The man has shared an elevator with the AT&T girl. YOU MAKE THE CALL!
Questions:
1. Other people in the elevator or just him and my future ex-wife.
2. Where was the elevator? Popular place or residential?
3. Was idle conversation started or was she reaching for her mace?
Just him.
Residential.
Yes, but he’s married, so…
Seems legit.
Really just passed her on my way in while she was on her way out. Residential – same building as poker and she is friends with the host but has never actually played.
M, maybe M-and-a-half.
Nice play. Normally people would run away after a flush on the flop, let alone with paint. They wouldn’t have a high flush because you had the highest flush.
What was the pot for?
It’s a $10 buy in game, so maybe total chip share amounted to $7 or so. He’s actually quite a good player and usually moneys.
Oh, okay. Still pretty good that you got someone to call with a Royal Flush on the board. Every time I catch Quads, the table runs away.
As the price of beer continues to rise, if I had the right kind of brewing skills, I’d have a brewery that does like Designer Imposters but for beer. And then we’d just make all your favorites under one roof and they’d be cheaper.
You’d think eventually food science will improve to the point where they could just add a bunch of chemicals together to replicate things.
Ester beer!
We used to paint beers and have an Easter Beer hunt at my dorm. Except one year they bought toxic paint so we played beer can baseball instead.
I’m sure it’s being studied extensively by AB-Inbev.
Jelly belly could make it happen.
Doesn’t break my heart to see Green Bay get humiliated on national TV again. At least the Bears have the common decency to get humiliated in regional coverage.