Your “It’s A Color Rush-Tastic!/ RAMMIT!” NFC West Showdown Open Thread

RAMS/49ERS:

That recently-displaced St. Louis football squad finally gets to leave the aloof and disinterested confines of whatever that stadium is that they now play in. The Empty Seat Convention (“this place is so roomy!”) that occurred the two previous Sundays wasn’t embarrassing for the league higher-ups at all, mostly because that is not an emotional response that they’re capable of. The Rams blew out the Colts and came within 7 of the ‘Dacteds so it would seem that the guy that looks like Gronk’s off-season wingman-HC Sean McVay(“I was born in ’86. Feel old yet?”)-has them pointed in a direction that isn’t rock bottom. This is a team that can be 7-9 this year and actually feel good about it. To his further credit he’s given up on Tavon Austin (16 snaps in two games) and rolled the dice on Sammy Watkins. The latter hasn’t done anything yet but as I said about Chris Hogan, it takes a bit of time to bleed the Buffalo from one’s system.  Qb Goff sports the league’s highest passer rating (146.8) on throws over 20 yards so he can throw the deep ball with precision. That’s a start.

The 0-2 Niners have yet to score a TD this year. Their game last week vs. Seattle was like Burning Man for somnambulists. Rb Hyde is doing his part by running at a 7 yard per carry clip and I figure he’s the one that finally crosses the goal line for San Fran this week. The RAMMIT D gave up 5.9 yards per run last week but Aaron Donald is rounding into shape so we’ll see how things develop. ‘Pedestrian’ describes qb Hoyer’s play and what he might look like in Donte Stallworth’s headlights.

Let’s make the best of this. If you’d like to weigh in on politics, comedy, Hot Ones, your 70’s porn star figurine collection or anything else afore the game you should give ‘er below.

 

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Gratliff

Also dat catching

hippofant

Have the 49ers caught a fucking slant all game?

Gratliff

Whoa. Cut that shit out. This isn’t reddit.

ballsofsteelandfury

I fucked that joke up

Romonobyl

Odd you would say that when I’m watching a special about Viet Nam on PBS.

King Hippo

We been crackin’ wise (and discussing more generally) LBJ in the open threads this week

Romonobyl

Haven’t had the chance to participate. It’s a pretty good series, most PBS historical presentations are above-average watchable.

LemonJello

“Must…refrain…from…commenting.”
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King Hippo

We needs a defensive TD

WCS

Jeebus Criminey, #GEOSTORM looks impressively terrible.

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LemonJello

Would you call it a….

/removes sunglasses

shitstorm?

YEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH1!!!11!!!!

The Maestro

Oh, sure. The Thursday night games only get good once my evening hockey starts up for the season. Thanks, NFL.

LemonJello

I think this a one-off, it probably won’t happen again this season.

ballsofsteelandfury

Don’t call this good. This is two third graders fighting in the schoolyard and you calling it boxing.

Senor Weaselo

Shit, that’s good, but you’re already on the banner.

The Maestro

“Can’t they fight in the showers instead?”

– J. Sandusky

King Hippo

Baby Buster – 36.47 points FOAR Hippo.

Gratliff

Dat tackling

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Romonobyl

He’s playing again?
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Gratliff

Wrong Dat for the quality on display

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King Hippo

Again…HAVE A NIGHT

Moose -The End Is Well Nigh

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Duchess

Movie Confession:

I have seen Full Metal Jacket like 5 times and never once made it past basic training.

Senor Weaselo

I didn’t make it through a full sitting of Big Lebowski. But in fairness, we had been drinking beforehand, and then we played the Big Lebowski drinking game, and my beverage of choice was a combination of Mountain Dew Voltage and Dubra vodka that I called Volt Tackle.

ballsofsteelandfury

that’s more of a weed movie, not alcohol.

LemonJello

I’ve never seen more than gifs of Big Lebowski. No ragrets, too.

Brick Meathook

The Big Lebowski kicks in on the third viewing. It’s a well documented phenomenom.

Brick Meathook

I’ve never seen “Ferris Buehler’s Day Off”

LemonJello

That’s really the better part of that movie.

King Hippo

I really dig the M-I-C-K-E-Y-M-O-U-S-E part at the end, though. Also, “I think it represents the duality of man, sir.”

LemonJello

We’d sing F-U-C-K-E-D-A-G-A-I-N, usually when the trucks failed to show up and we had to hump back to the barracks after a week in the field.

ballsofsteelandfury

Guys, I don’t know how to put this… I’m…I’m worried about Hippo. He… thinks the Rams are… good.

LemonJello

I’d say prescribe something, but it’s more likely that there’d be some weird drug interaction and he’d grow a second penis.

On his forehead.

I guess we have to just let this madness run it’s course.

King Hippo

I’m MOAR opiate than man at this point

King Hippo

Not so much good as…interesting? And better than the 3 garbage pails they share a division with.

ballsofsteelandfury

I disagree on Seattle. They may not be great, but they’re a couple of levels above the rest.

King Hippo

The OL has gone from bad to maybe worst in NFL, and I think the defense may only be decent now. It’s just Charmslinger v. the world,

ballsofsteelandfury

Losing by 8 at Lambeau is acceptable. They did this last year too. Started slow then got going.

King Hippo

yeah but GB has same problem. Both tackles missing. Rodgers was running for his life both games so far.

But Packers should get healthy, SEA is just bad. We shall see if they adjust, you are right they did last year.

blaxabbath

God – this game is so boring that, as Al said, “And there is Goff’s jersey on display at his high school.” I thought, “Interesting. His high school used the new Rams uniform design for their jerseys.

LemonJello

“Tonight, the role of Al Michaels is being played by Mike Tirico.”

herodotus450

Only Garrett I recognize is… well I don’t know his last name, but this one
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blaxabbath

I have seen zero Blade Runner films.

litre_cola

There is more than one?

LemonJello

The original (1982) and the soon-to-be released sequel.

Duchess

they made one but it was recut 30 times… George Lucas has called it a ridiculous cash grab and blatant exploitation of its devoted fan base and approves of it all.

ballsofsteelandfury

I’ve seen bits and pieces but never the entire movie. I always end up getting bored and switching the channel.

herodotus450

I’ve always been too bored to explain my opinion on the movie, but that sums it up perfectly.

LemonJello

SHAN’KHLOR makes her presence known

Gratliff

Holy fuck. How many Celeks are there?

blaxabbath

Is there a grittyier position in sports than slot receiver? Middle-inning reliever?

Senor Weaselo

Brian Scalabrine?

herodotus450

I’d still go with Fullback. Forward passes are the work of the devil. Or whoever starches everyone’s shirts inbetween cricket days.

King Hippo

He thinks “they are starting to like footbaw again” in SF? REALLY??

blaxabbath

I don’t believe that.

Mostly because that crowd’s only association with SF is that it’s the place where they send their credit card payments.

blaxabbath

Hand it to Hyde!

Brick Meathook

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LemonJello

Jaquiski Tartt ISN’T a Key & Peele made up name?

ballsofsteelandfury

So, we’re all agreed that Don T is really lucky he can’t see or hear of this game tonight, right?

litre_cola

Maybe that magical Burger King has a generator. I mean they sell sandwiches so it is truly mystical.

King Hippo

We need to make a pilgrimage to DonT’s magic BK one day. It can be our Mecca.

King Hippo

I mean, the fashion choices are quite objectionable. The football has exceeded my admittedly low expectations/

LemonJello

Most painful and slow method of death: Collinsworth deserves it.

Senor Weaselo

Does Omicron Perseid 8’s fleem exist?
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King Hippo

JEEBUS, RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRAM IT!!

Romonobyl
Senor Weaselo

Can Maestro and I just get depressed at the headline?

Romonobyl

That’s more than enough info. Remember, Atlantic signed Led Zeppelin.

Senor Weaselo

I wrote a paper in econ my senior year of HS on Ertegun, I know.
/Shit, that was a long time ago.

herodotus450

SHouldn’t it be “This Heaux,” though?

herodotus450

Also, Rebecca Black has NOT aged well.

Romonobyl

That’s what happens when you treat every day like it’s Friday.

Doktor Zymm

I’m going to go sleep and them maybe wake up in the middle of the night for sex but probably not and go RAMMIT I think? Damned if I know what the hell is going on.

LemonJello

Up is down, yadda yadda etc…

Senor Weaselo

That’s… possibly good hustle? Do we have hustle percentages? Wouldn’t you be in charge of that anyway?

Romonobyl

I often wake up in the middle of the night wanting sex, but I’ll usually go into the bathroom so I don’t disturb my wife.

LemonJello

A true scholar and a gentleman.

+1 fedora tip

King Hippo

yeah, fuck him I am owed a GurleyDOWN

Gratliff
King Hippo

Baby BusterDOWN will suffice, me start him too.

Gratliff

Goddamn what a run

Doktor Zymm

Whatever happened to so and so network buying the first half of the Thursday games? Did they realize it’s only assholes like me that watch them?

herodotus450

twitter or amazon has them now? And some are simulcast locally? Too complicated, don’t caaaaaaaaaaaare.

King Hippo

shut-ins like us are who uses teh amazon!

King Hippo

The coin that told me to start Baby Buster did a good. This is better than holding my breath on Black HODOR! or suck-ass cocksucking Cousins.

Gratliff

Are the Rams actually this good on offense?

Sharkbait

Its the 49ers. No.

King Hippo

But reasonably effective? I think maybe so. They could get to 9-7. That would suffice for their division, which is ass-flavored shit.

ballsofsteelandfury

Ok, when you get to 11-5, we’re calling an intervention and cutting you off the pills.

King Hippo

I almost feel like RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRAM IT!!! is better off with Baby Buster throwing it. My, how times have changed.

Gratliff

He’s got that Eye Discipline

Shogun Marcus

So did Sammy Davis Jr!

King Hippo

He’s giving Cris tingles in his butt cavity, ain’t he?

Mr. Ayo

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Brick Meathook

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Doktor Zymm

Are you lookin’ at me?

litre_cola

Brocky may not have too much to bitch about in his post,. Against Maestro he has Gurley.

King Hippo

He could lose by that non-TD that should have been challenged!

Doktor Zymm

My birthday is tomorrow! I’m OLD! I still have to go to work! I want booze and hugs for my birthday! I’m quitting in a week anyway, so those don’t have to be HR compliant hugs!

herodotus450

If you get drunk BEFORE going in, technically it’s not drinking at work.

Doktor Zymm

What if I put booze in food? That’s eating at work!

LemonJello

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I don’t think this counts.

Doktor Zymm

Why the bed of lettuce?

King Hippo

THAT’S GOOD ALCOHOLISM HUSTLE!!

herodotus450

“I don’t know how that got there, though it is a VERY old loaf of bread…”

Sharkbait

That’s solid work advice.

Sharkbait

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LemonJello

Well, Happy Birthday (Early, 1 each), Frau Doktor!

Senor Weaselo

Will you accept Internet hugs in the level of HR compliance of your choice?

King Hippo

SF coach challenges THAT and RRRRRRRRRRRRRAM IT!!! guy won’t challenge to get a fucking touchdown

Gratliff

Best non-JJ Watt on a Fat Guy tackle of the year

litre_cola

That is a great tackle.

Spur

am out, i have to be in the whale’s vagina in the morning and then a drive back to vegas, Goodnight ladies and gents.

King Hippo

What is that pseudo-bomber jacket that McVay is wearing? Is that fashion risk a nod to the OKC thing??

LemonJello

Sweet dreams and safe travels!
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Obviously, this is supposed to be in response to Spur, below. But the same wishes to you, too, Yer Majesty.

SonOfSpam

Rick Wilson‏ on Twitter:
Has no one noticed that the Paul Manafort is an anagram for “Anal Trump Oaf”?

SonOfSpam

Gotta head to the airport to pick up Mrs SOS, but dammit, I don’t wanna miss any of this masterpiece (the open thread, not the game)

Sharkbait

At least WE make this shit good.

Doktor Zymm

I will be located half way between the current monstrosities and the piratish ones. I will eventually see both. But the Raiders first cause Vegas.

King Hippo

Fucking Oklahoma City bomber, fucking up my already near-certain fantasy win!

Doktor Zymm

I like big BOOZE AND I CAN NOT LIE (Also Butts)

King Hippo

Why didn’t he challenge that shit? He was in!

litre_cola

Pretty happy I am not playing against Gurley in any league

MikeWallaceAndGromit

HAIL BLEERGH

blaxabbath

Normally I’d bitch about the quality of TNF but then I realize that SF would be just as shitty after a Week 2 bye.

Duchess

I’ve been kicking myself in the balls for the last 2 hours instead of watching football and it looks like I made the wiser decision.

Doktor Zymm

Neat, congrats on the flexible quads

LemonJello

Or condolences on the low-hanging balls…