Well, well, well-here we are again. Rise and shine, beasties because the NFL has got a treat for you! I’d suggest you have a bland breakfast of some sort since you don’t want it causing too much damage on the way back up. So tapioca it is! Man, do I hate tapioca. You know what? A nice bagel and cream cheese should do the trick. Let’s go with that. Now let’s go… TO THE GAME!
Min/Cle: By now you’ve heard that a gas leak in the kitchen forced the Brownies to get up in the middle of the night. The place they were staying at sounds like the most English-y spot ever-PennyHill Park in Bagshot. The more religious of the Browns players were surprised to discover that the Bible in the night table drawer was replaced with a copy of Charles Dickins’ The Pickwick Papers. For Cleveland it just gets worse and worse as things tend to get when you’re living in an 0-7 hole. The 311 on qb Kizer is just that-3 TD passes against 11 interceptions. With the exception of one time, each game he’s started has begun with a 3-and-out. The lone exception was a ‘drive’ four plays long. His pathetic wr crew hasn’t done him any favours either-they’ve got 13 drops total among them. How is Kenny Britt still starting in this league? Can I pile on some more? Sure. The team is without its best player in Joe Thomas and will also be missing starters at the dt, de, cb and safety positions.
Everson Griffin has nine sacks in seven games and is looking to get more while going up against the awesomely-named Spencer Drango. The latter sounds like the guy that Arnold lied to about killing last in that movie. Rb’s Murray and McKinnon have done well in Dalvin Cook’s absence as they both have a 100 yarder under their respective belts. Qb Case Keenum has had his ups and downs as one would expect of a perennial back-up but the guy is 4-2, cut him some slack.
Type away, my pretties!
Play the Browns is fucking better than a bye.
It would make sense for the Browns to go back to back 1-15 seasons with their only wins being the fucking Chargers…
FUCK YOU HUE JACKSON THIS IS WHY I TAKE DELIGHT IN EVERY LOSS: http://www.cleveland.com/browns/index.ssf/2016/10/hue_jackson_defends_bringing_i.html
Do you think if we convince President Trump that the Browns donated to Hilary Clinton, we could get him to place them on the No Fly List and they stay in London?
I think it would be enough if you just tell they’re literally browns.
THIS BROWNS FOOTBALL TEAM, I CALL IT THE CUBA NATIONAL BASEBALL TEAM BECAUSE THEY ARE RUN BY AN INEPT GROUP AND SOME OF THE TALENTED PLAYERS MAY RUN TO A NEUTRAL EMBASSY AND PLEA FOR ASYLUM TO AVOID GOING BACK HOME!!!!
Oh yeah.
All this game is missing is a Brown being blinded by a flag in the eye.
NO ONE MAY SEE THE TRUE VISAGE OF BLEEEERGH.
Stole my joke………punk…..
This guy is an American hero.
Imagine the numbers Crowell could put up on an NFL team…
More interestingly, imagine the numbers Cromwell could put up! He’d be surrounded by roundheads!
This is a history reference that I get.
Why do we call all (most?) porn actresses “porn stars” but only a very few non-porn actors/actresses “movie stars”?
Because movie stars are saved for the very best and some porn stars are better actor/actresses than some mainstream ones.
This feels like a commentary on Jessica alba and Olivia munn
So is Hue Jackson the worst Head Coach in NFL History or is there someone worst? Defend your arguments.
new thread?
But you’ll miss the Brown comeb-HAHAHAHAHAHA!
Oh fuck you Hue…you are fucking 1-22. This call is not going to change fuck all. Stop dragging this train wreck out…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7xzU9Qqdqww
Do you think they just performed a knee transplant, and that’s why Bradford is out indefinitely while they’re saying Bridgewater might be back after the bye?
That would explain Bradford’s odd story of passing out and waking up in a bathtub full of ice.
Everton, back to vile shite.
http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-d5b1ObyoP54/U8Oy84SMgVI/AAAAAAAAAcc/PEgPoEX-I3k/s1600/Eye+Cups.gif
…..you know some times i wonder how the browns can be this bad.
And then I watch them play
It’s still a mystery how a team can be that poorly managed to create such consistently awful play
Its intentional.
I honestly believe it. Why spend money and effort for a 10-6 team when you can be cheap as fuck and make more money by fielding a 4-12.
Oh who am I kidding…I would fucking kill for a 4-12 season…
I imagine it’s the same with Cinci and Chicago, at least. Be as cheap as possible, no scouts (or general manager), just draft whover Kiper says to, never sign big free agents but still bring in that revenue share (which is more than enough to cover a payroll at the top of the salary cap). The nfl media/marketing take care of ensuring that your fan base grows, so why try to actually win when it’s such a crapshoot anyway?
It’s absolutely intentional. Haslam knows how to operate a racket better than anyone.
Shared profits. The NFL is rather socialist,
!st time i heard this I thought it was Peter Gabriel
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bhtoDhlffsE
A fictional threesome you didn’t know you wanted
Yeah, but the one of the left has massive father issues and severe emotional problems, especially with her anger.
The one on the left blue herself
Redshirt: “Oh, I’m full. I can’t eat another bite.”
Half Eaten Pizza: “Quitter.”
Redshirt: “WHAT DID YOU SAY TO ME?!”
Huh, showed that pizza.
Booze store is open!
[waits to go because he doesn’t want to be the first one there/is in complete denial]
/Scotchnaut opens the booze store door
NORM!
“I’ll take everything on the second shelf on the left and the top shelf of the cooler. Thank you.”
It’s pouring here today and we’re supposed to get 3″ of rain through tomorrow. Which, yeah, in the Carolinas is a light drizzle but up here in Connecticut where we don’t have webbed feet and gills it’s more of a big deal.
Anyhoo, yesterday I winterized the cats’ outdoor shelter. An old shelving unit with two levels, a couple of cat-carriers stuffed with fleece blankets and wrapped with towels, the whole thing wrapped with two folded-over tarps and each end closed off on an angle with plywood covered with two more tarps. The lower level even has a 6″ lip/dam supported by bricks to keep out any water.
This morning one of the cats is in the basement and the other, more feral one has stuffed herself into a den she built herself under a piece of an old lawnmower that I chucked in the woods.
Fucking cats.
Hiiiisssssssss
— Jay Cutler
Now the London fixture on teevee box muted, two game/match threads on home laptop, Everton on work laptop (with sound), slightly hungover.
I think I am gonna have a stroke.
Have a stroke? Which device is the porn on?
This was a game for far longer than I thought it would be. Hey look-it’s a low bar!
Do they sell anything edible at Applebees?
Bourbon.
Free mints at the hostess station. Those won’t give you too much cancer.
What does it say about their rep that I’ve never been and yet feel the need to tell you not to go?
I hated Applebee’s even when I was in undergrad and had no taste whatsoever. They manage to fuck up ribs, even
The beer.
Applebees changed their menu a while ago. I actually had a decent burger the last time I was in one. Which, admittedly, was probably well over a year ago at this point.
I’m going to lose today to a team starting three (3) TEs. I suck.
Everton wearing the Detroit Lions kit again, it’s actually pretty cool, as far as away kits go
Uhh…dear Google Maps, I’m pretty sure KFC is not a sports bar
Kyle looking like Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer because he just guided the Vikings to a touchdown. Ho! Ho! Ho!
well, I sure as shit didn’t need THAT
that’s what happens when you give to NOT McKinnon, assdicks
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VRa_PwL2aws
I would accuse the officials of bias…. but you know…
Browns
I have to say, watching this on the BBC with absolutely no ads is really refreshing. They seem to have done a decent job getting not-idiots in the studio for all the breaks too.
I think it’s obligatory to post some version of this every London game:
Dammit, now I gotta go get something to eat!
Back in my grocery stocking days, the international food section always allowed for great comedy
Matt Groening will stop at nothing to get that succulent merchandising money.
MOAR McKinnonDOWN please
Texan players are going to rip off their Texan logo today!? We must have a livefeed of this.
TO REVEAL A 500!!!
I thought there was a variety of things being discussed?
If they even take the field, they’ve lost.
Guess this Diggs thing isn’t happening today. Keenum only has eyes for Theilen.
Yep, mistakes made by me.
If you have Kyle Sloter as your back-up FF QB, congratulations, you really suck at FF.
Maybe that league gets points for having a Frisb-golf expert on the team
It’s like the Niners and Browns exist to keep the NFC race close. Fully expect the Eagles to shit the bed against San Fran in an hour.
Seems unlikely, but that would be a very entertaining Eagles type thing to do
The Eagles fan mentality easily allows for complete faith in the winless Niners soundly beating the league-leading Eagles.
I think that type of thinking is common to a lot of fandoms. Football teams are all fickle bastards
Correct.
Powell vs Atlanta or Jones Jr vs. Steelers at the flex. Yeah, I’m 2-5, what of it?
Atlanta’s defense is horrible.
probably Powell, he seems like a mudder